Why does life have to hurt so bad sometimes?

[BMNABrinx]

I don't know if I have ever hurt this badly in my entire life. My grandmother was diagnosed on Dec. 7th with stage 2 Diffuse large b-cell lymphoma. She had a bone marrow biopsy that came back clean and an echo that showed her heart strong enough to tolerate chemo. She had her first chemo treatment on Dec. 17th and on Sunday she was admitted to the hospital for complications from the chemo. She is 79 years old but was doing well up until Sunday night. They have taken such good care of her and she was doing much better this morning. Now things have changed again. She is talking but not making much sense and says that she is just waiting to "go home and see Jesus". I don't want her to suffer and I would like to be selfish and keep her here with me at all costs but I know I can't do that. It just hurts so badly because she is one of my very best friends. I have been with her through the whole ordeal and I just wish there was more that I could have done.
They say her vitals are still good but I believe she is giving up now. She is tired and doesn't want to fight anymore. I'm still praying but it is so hard.

Thanks for letting me "talk" a little.

 

[safetymom]

It's tough watching a loved one struggle with illness. It is out of your hands. I will say a prayer for all of you.

Please keep posting your thoughts. It really does help.

 

[BMNABrinx]

Thank you very much for the prayers. My grandma passed from this live into life everlasting early this morning. Today is very hard. I know that as time passes it will be easier but there will always be an empty spot. I know that she is no longer suffering and has been reunited with so many of her friends and loved ones. I will see her again someday but right now I feel lost. I was able to go to help with the arrangements, as much as I could anyway. My thoughts are still very scattered and emotions very raw.
Thanks again,
Mis

 

[safetymom]

I am sorry to hear your Grandma passed away. Just try to be good to yourself and just try to take life in small steps for awhile. Take comfort in your memories of her.

 

[Mackey Mouse]

I am so sorry to hear about her passing, it must be hard for your family right now. She is at peace....God bless her.