Why do people send their kids to school sick?

[cjbcam]

I absolutely hate when people send their kids to school sick. I have four kids and when they bring something home from school it takes a while for it to make it through everyone. We used to live in a different city and the school they went to there was very strict on people not sending their kids sick. If you did you would be called to pick them up. This worked awesome, my kids hardly got sick. School is not there for child care. It's there to provide an education. So for me the excuse that you couldn't take time off work or whatever doesn't fly with me. What does everyone else think?

 

[bumbershoot]

Because they cannot take the time off. Doesn't matter info doesnt fly with you.

In a different time, once I was ten I could stay home by myself when sick. And I did. There was no other option. That sort of thing is frowned upon now. If I worked an didn't homeschool I would lose my job pretty quick. Because when DS and/or I get sick, we are not capable of doing much for usually a full week. We are actually still behind in learning from last year because we kept bouncing nasty colds back and forth and we are both so useless when ill.

 

[cjbcam]

Because they cannot take the time off. Doesn't matter info doesnt fly with you.

In a different time, once I was ten I could stay home by myself when sick. And I did. There was no other option. That sort of thing is frowned upon now. If I worked an didn't homeschool I would lose my job pretty quick. Because when DS and/or I get sick, we are not capable of doing much for usually a full week. We are actually still behind in learning from last year because we kept bouncing nasty colds back and forth and we are both so useless when ill.

It's not the schools problem if you can't afford to take time off work. There are other options like you finding a sitter. Even you say you were so sick last year you are behind in learning from being sick and I know from experience that kids who go to schools that are strict about not letting kids coming to school sick get sick way less often. Like I said school is not a form of child care.

 

[mousehunter3]

Totally agree. Same thing with daycare. We have a triple whammy- school, daycare, and our workplaces. People send their sick kiddos to both and people come into work sick. Same with people just being out in public when they are sick.

People need to be consider of others. We don't all want to share your germs. Stay home and keep your kids home if you or they are sick.

Last year, several stains of illness traveled through our family over the course of a few months. It is really frustrating.

 

[mjkacmom]

Depends on the definition of sick. I'm a SAHM, but when my kids were little, they were little boogie-heads. At least one of them was sneezing, had a runny nose, cough, etc. If I kept them home, I would've been homeschooling. Fortunately, they have built up very strong antibodies, and are rarely sick now.

Now, I follow the rules of 24 hours vomit free/fever free, and 2 doses of antibiotics before going back after a strep diagnosis.

 

[Betty Rohrer]

j have had jobs where you could go and get a sick child at school after school called but could not take off to stay with sick child, one was in child care. I have even had parents at the day care tell me to wait an hour then call them at work and they would come and get their child. but one other thing to remember a lot of sickness is passed on the day before child shows signs. so even though child shows no signs on Monday but gets sick either Monday night or Tues day morning you child was exposed on Monday. we saw this so many times by the time child spikes the fever the damage was already done and wa would see it a week later.

 

[luvmy3]

It depends on the level of sick for me. If my kid has a cold then I send them in. If they have a fever, or are vomiting I'll keep them home.

 

[3Gsandme]

Some parents don't care if they send their kids to school sick and miserable.

Some parents don't have a choice but to send their kids to school sick and miserable.

I'm so glad I'm a SAHM. If someone is sick, no biggie, but we're lucky. My brother and sister in law are out of vacation time for 2013. If their daughter gets sick, they have some hard choices to make that I don't envy. And, I'd take my niece all day, every day but we live out of state.

There's nothing you can do to make the parents who don't care care enough to not send sick kids to school and there's nothing you can do to change employment policies and circumstances that leave parents unable to take time off for their sick kids.

 

[SEA333]

I absolutely hate when people send their kids to school sick. I have four kids and when they bring something home from school it takes a while for it to make it through everyone. We used to live in a different city and the school they went to there was very strict on people not sending their kids sick. If you did you would be called to pick them up. This worked awesome, my kids hardly got sick. School is not there for child care. It's there to provide an education. So for me the excuse that you couldn't take time off work or whatever doesn't fly with me. What does everyone else think?

A. You MUST be a stay at home mother to even ask a thing like this, and to be to so judgemental.

B. I have been all - stay at home, work from home, and work out of the home, and let me tell you....when I stayed at home, it was an easy decision to make. It was also MUCH easier when it was only my oldest in school (he is 4 years older tha #2, and #3 is 19 months younger than #2)

C. When I was a stay at home mom: My kid had a cough that kept them up all night? They stayed home. My kid's eye was a little red? off to the Dr to rule out pinkeye. My kid threw up Sunday morning, but never had a fever and was fine the rest of the day? He stayed home Monday. You hurt your ankle at football practice last night? Why don't you stay home and put some ice on it.

D. Working outside of the home goes a little more like this: your eyes look a little pink. You were outside all day yesterday in the grass and you have allergies. your eye is not crusty or ozzing. You are going to school.

You threw up at 6am Sunday, but don't have a fever and ate dinner just fine last night? You are going to school.

Coughing? Runny nose? you are going to school.

You hurt your ankle at football? Let me call your friend's mom and see if she will drive you home after school today.

Fever? Sore thoat with white spots? No school for you - let's go to the Wellness Clinic at Target as soon as they open since the DR cannot get you in until tomorrow.

Throwing up on Tuesday morning? I'll call into work this time, DH, next time, it's your turn. Hopefully, this is only a 24-hour thing.

E. Times all of this by 3 for three kids. I am lucky that my employer gives us unlimited sick days, but I still try to NOT take advantage, and save them for when my kids really do need to stay home.

My youngest child (2nd grade) has asthma. He has been in the hospital a few times, once for three days. Each time, he caught the "virus" that caused his asthma to flare up from school because none of the rest of us were sick at all. Do I panic when I get the note home that the flu is going around my asthmatic child's classroom? Heck yeah!!! Does it make me want to post nasty things to parents on a discussion board?

Not really. I think we all need to settle down a little.

***Edited for a disclaimer: I'm not attacking stay at home parents or starting a SAHM vs. WOHM debate. All I am saying that, in my experience, it was a LOT easier to make a snap decision to keep my kid home when I was actually AT HOME. Working out of the home causes parents to really think about the options/benefits/drawbacks of every decision.

 

[luvmy2babies]

Two children, one elementary age, one preschool age. I work full-time out of the house and I’m widowed so no dad in the house or out of the house for backup. I don’t know anyone I can call at 6am for same day care of a sick child.

If I know it’s allergies or a regular cold, I’m treating it, but it’s an every 12 hour med and they are going to school as long as they have remained fever free and have slept relatively well. My son has allergies and sometimes wakes up looking like he has been in an alley brawl, but he’s on meds for it and the redness generally clears by 9am or so from what I have noticed on the weekends. I let them know when he gets there the reason he looks that way and tell them if he seems very uncomfortable to call me. If I kept him home, he’d be bouncing off the walls all day. He also though has reactive airway disease so if he’s wheezing we’re home because he has to have the nebulizer every 6 hours. But after his diagnosis we got a preventive med and I’ve been able to keep wheezing at bay. Of course if anyone is spewing from either end, they stay home.

My school aged child is Dyslexic and ADHD. Unless she is really miserable she needs to be in school. Regular homework is enough. Piling on makeup work when we could avoid it, would be a nightmare. Thankfully they are hardly sick now, but that wasn’t always the case. I have never violated any sick policy at either child’s school, and if either child is “miserable” they don’t go, but they don’t stay home with everything they get either.

 

[Crystal824]

DH and I both work outside the home. If DD has a fever or is vomiting, we will try to keep her home, but a cold. Heck no. You only get so many days off from work. It is easy to say call a sitter, but you don't usually know your kid is sick until the day of the illness. It isn't as easy as it sounds to find a sitter for that same day.

 

[plutoloversmom]

I agree about what you are saying about sickness spreading through the schools, but don't adults do the same thing by going to work sick? Maybe we should all get more sick time so we can spend the time to get better an to take days off when our families are sick and need us. I still can't figure out why people say schools are not daycares? That us exactly what they are. This was due to child labor laws being put into effect and women joining the work force. In order to keep children from being unsupervised and running the streets school attendance was enforced and became mandatory. It was also a way that Uncle Sam could attain a more educated work force. Sorry about the rant I just hate when people say that schools aren't meant to be daycares when the history of American education states the opposite.

 

[Gracie09]

If my kids have a cold and no fever et., they go to school. One of my daughters has crap lungs and when she gets a chest cold she "throws up" mucus and then is fine. No fever, no issues eating so if she feels fine she goes. Any fever, actual vomit, etc they go. My kids love school and hate staying home. I am a sahm.

 

[cjbcam]

A. You MUST be a stay at home mother to even ask a thing like this, and to be to so judgemental.

B. I have been all - stay at home, work from home, and work out of the home, and let me tell you....when I stayed at home, it was an easy decision to make. It was also MUCH easier when it was only my oldest in school (he is 4 years older tha #2, and #3 is 19 months younger than #2)

C. When I was a stay at home mom: My kid had a cough that kept them up all night? They stayed home. My kid's eye was a little red? off to the Dr to rule out pinkeye. My kid threw up Sunday morning, but never had a fever and was fine the rest of the day? He stayed home Monday. You hurt your ankle at football practice last night? Why don't you stay home and put some ice on it.

D. Working outside of the home goes a little more like this: your eyes look a little pink. You were outside all day yesterday in the grass and you have allergies. your eye is not crusty or ozzing. You are going to school.

You threw up at 6am Sunday, but don't have a fever and ate dinner just fine last night? You are going to school.

Coughing? Runny nose? you are going to school.

You hurt your ankle at football? Let me call your friend's mom and see if she will drive you home after school today.

Fever? Sore thoat with white spots? No school for you - let's go to the Wellness Clinic at Target as soon as they open since the DR cannot get you in until tomorrow.

Throwing up on Tuesday morning? I'll call into work this time, DH, next time, it's your turn. Hopefully, this is only a 24-hour thing.

E. Times all of this by 3 for three kids. I am lucky that my employer gives us unlimited sick days, but I still try to NOT take advantage, and save them for when my kids really do need to stay home.

My youngest child (2nd grade) has asthma. He has been in the hospital a few times, once for three days. Each time, he caught the "virus" that caused his asthma to flare up from school because none of the rest of us were sick at all. Do I panic when I get the note home that the flu is going around my asthmatic child's classroom? Heck yeah!!! Does it make me want to post nasty things to parents on a discussion board?

Not really. I think we all need to settle down a little.

***Edited for a disclaimer: I'm not attacking stay at home parents or starting a SAHM vs. WOHM debate. All I am saying that, in my experience, it was a LOT easier to make a snap decision to keep my kid home when I was actually AT HOME. Working out of the home causes parents to really think about the options/benefits/drawbacks of every decision.

I was not attacking anyone but u seem to like to. It's not my fault if your kid gets sick and you can't take off work. You are responsible for your kid if you can't take a day off then you should have a back up plan. My family shouldn't have to suffer because other people irresponsibly send their kids to school sick. Kids wouldn't get sick as often if people would keep them home when sick. It's a fact. Stating a fact isn't attacking anyone.

 

[FlightlessDuck]

The student has already missed too much time.
The student doesn't have fever.
The parent doesn't think the student is contagious.




Finally, this thread should be on the Community Board.

 

[Gracie09]

I was not attacking anyone but u seem to like to. It's not my fault if your kid gets sick and you can't take off work. You are responsible for your kid if you can't take a day off then you should have a back up plan. My family shouldn't have to suffer because other people irresponsibly send their kids to school sick. Kids wouldn't get sick as often if people would keep them home when sick. It's a fact. Stating a fact isn't attacking anyone.

You must not realize that most illness are contagious at least 24 hours before symptoms. So your little Johnny or Mary will have been exposed before another student would even be showing symptoms.

It's a luxury to be able to stay at home in this day and age. I am fortunate because when my daughter was very sick I was able to quit my job to care for her. Not many people have that ability. It easy to sit back and say just keep the kid home when you aren't struggling to make ends meet and may not have sick or vacation time as many low wage jobs don't. And don't start the whole you shouldn't have kids if you are in that situation because if you have learned nothing else over the last eight or so years you should have learned that people lose jobs through no fault of their own. And finding one of comparable pay and benefits it's not easy. So yeah I get why people may want to send their kid back to school when it could mean the difference between feeding them three meals a day or two meals a day that month or even keeping you low wage job so you can stay off govt assistance. But don't ever think it's an easy decision for most parents to make. We all want to bundle our kid up on the sofa and feed them soup until their better but reality is such that not every has that luxury

 

[kenthanson]

Single parent who works in low wage fast food industry where no benefits like sick days are given. Now single parent has three children to feed, cloth and house, if they miss a day of work they get fired because company has no use for people who don't show up, regardless of the reason. Compound this with the family lives in a new city with no support system like grandparents, friends, etc... and add to that the family couldn't afford to pay for a day sitter anyways because of the little amount of money that the family has, what's the options for the parent? Now after you tell me your side of the story I'll fill you in on the rest of it.

 

[SEA333]

I was not attacking anyone but u seem to like to. It's not my fault if your kid gets sick and you can't take off work. You are responsible for your kid if you can't take a day off then you should have a back up plan. My family shouldn't have to suffer because other people irresponsibly send their kids to school sick. Kids wouldn't get sick as often if people would keep them home when sick. It's a fact. Stating a fact isn't attacking anyone.

Calling you out on being judgemental for posting an inflammatory thread is really not attacking, nor is answering your question asking for our thoughts. I am also not calling you irresponsible, a bad parent, someone who is making my children suffer, and someone who doesn't plan ahead. I'm all for logical argument and debate, but let's be careful here about the pot calling the kettle black, yes?

As stated, I have been in all situations, and think that I have a pretty good handle of the sociological aspects of why people make the decisions they do regarding their sick children.

Just as an FYI since you seem to think that having a back up plan is SOOO easy - I am the queen of backup plans, so I always have at least three. Me, DH, and our babysitter, who will take my kids mildly sick. BUT - not everyone is so lucky. And, restated as well...my employer offers unlimited sick days, and on those days, I also get to work from home, so I *am* able to stay with my kids when they are sick. I did say, though, that I do not like to take advantage of it, so I do use them carefully.

And I think I can safely say for ALL working parents that the last thing that they want is that sinking feeling upon realizing on Wednesday morning that little junior has a blazing fever. Of course they do not want to send them to school - heck, they don't even want their child to BE sick! They have this ridiculously guilty feeling that they are even DEBATING what to do, because in a perfect world, there would be no hesitation - they would stay by their child's side and nurse them back to perfect health. I feel happy for you that (it sounds) like you have never had to make that choice while your little ones lay below you in bed hoping that your choice means they get your undivided attention the entire day. And I feel sad for all of the parents out there who have had to make that choice to leave their child with grandma or the babysitter, or, GULP!, send their child off to school hoping that they can make it through the day because is is Friday and they can rest on Saturday. The last thing on their mind at that point is other people's kids, sorry to say.


As for making you and your family suffer because of germs and illness - well...welcome to elementary school!!!!!! You won't get around it.

I don't know how old your kids are, but mine are 13, 9, and 7, and I would MUCH rather them be exposed to germs at school than the bratty bully who makes EVERYONE's life miserable by judging and thinking that the whole world revolves around them. Germs, I can handle. Bullies, I cannot.

Good luck with your kids! And remember...homeschooling is always an option!

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

I was not attacking anyone but u seem to like to. It's not my fault if your kid gets sick and you can't take off work. You are responsible for your kid if you can't take a day off then you should have a back up plan. My family shouldn't have to suffer because other people irresponsibly send their kids to school sick. Kids wouldn't get sick as often if people would keep them home when sick. It's a fact. Stating a fact isn't attacking anyone.

Most illness is spread before a person/child even shows signs of sickness. Also stating a fact.

I only keep my kids home with diarrhea, vomiting or fever.
Anything else they are going to school.

 

[cjbcam]

You must not realize that most illness are contagious at least 24 hours before symptoms. So your little Johnny or Mary will have been exposed before another student would even be showing symptoms.

It's a luxury to be able to stay at home in this day and age. I am fortunate because when my daughter was very sick I was able to quit my job to care for her. Not many people have that ability. It easy to sit back and say just keep the kid home when you aren't struggling to make ends meet and may not have sick or vacation time as many low wage jobs don't. And don't start the whole you shouldn't have kids if you are in that situation because if you have learned nothing else over the last eight or so years you should have learned that people lose jobs through no fault of their own. And finding one of comparable pay and benefits it's not easy. So yeah I get why people may want to send their kid back to school when it could mean the difference between feeding them three meals a day or two meals a day that month or even keeping you low wage job so you can stay off govt assistance. But don't ever think it's an easy decision for most parents to make. We all want to bundle our kid up on the sofa and feed them soup until their better but reality is such that not every has that luxury

Most illnesses are spread when you are showing symptoms. Runny nose and sneezing and coughing. In the twenty four hours before you show symptoms yeah you are contagious but you are not coughing and sneezing on people or blowing your nose and opening doors etc. Basic hygiene like washing your hands and such should combat that problem. I would never say you shouldn't have kids if you can't afford it. Most of these so called people who say they can't afford to take a day off or what ever maybe have their priorities wrong. My husband and I have lived really poor and would still stay home if kids are sick. We also would not have tv or video games or cell phones. It's all in choices made. I still think if your kids are obviously sick don't send and make other kids sick.