Why do kids hurt animals? (from the "had to spank my 8 yr old" thread)

[Snoopymom]

This has been bothering me.

A friend's 8 yr old has also hurt their dog and my 4 yr old recently kicked a family member's dog, and he loves this dog...begs to feed him treats and walk him.

Is this really a trait of serial killers? I can't imagine that there are that many future serial killers out there. So, what makes kids do this? Any ideas?

 

[cynsaun]

I honestly don't know. We have two girls that have never tried to hurt our animals, they love them so much. We do, however, have an issue going on right now where a neighbor girl threatened to kill our dog. The only thing I can think in this instance is it is a cry for help, but she is 10 years old.

With your 4-year-old child, I don't think it's a cry for help. I just don't think that little ones understand what they are doing. He probably got frustrated with something the dog did or didn't do, and reacted. By you telling your son it was wrong, hopefully, he will learn from that.

That's just my opinion, though.

 

[ckay87]

I think there's a difference between plain roughness and the intent to kill or torture an animal. I think most kids are just too rough. If it makes you feel any better, they will also hit or be rough with their friends or playmates.

What worries me is that an animal will protect himself if provoked. I'd be willing to bet many or most dog bites come from an animal who's been played with too roughly.

 

[EsmeraldaX]

I think, a lot of children get frustrated with pets because they want to communicate with them, and can't. Our neighbors 4 year old gets a little too rough with Monty sometimes and when he does, we take Monty away. His mother said he also sometimes frightens their cat.

I don't think he is a future serial killer. He shows too much love for the animals. He doesn't hurt them to see them in pain or to intentionally hurt them. He is 4 years old. He doesn't fully understand that these are living things which is why we won't let him near Monty without an adult present at all times. Monty is an incredibly mellow dog who can handle it, I'd be more worry about the child hurting him.

I've seen the child get upset with Monty for not doing what he asks him to. Again, he's 4. When he says "Monty go get the ball over there" and Monty just sits there because Monty doesn't know what that phrase means, the child gets frustrated. And we try to teach the child to say "Monty fetch!" which Monty *would* respond to, but he's little and he doesn't really get why he needs to say anything special to the dog.

If the child was older or intentionally trying to hurt the animal and laughing about it, then I'd be worried. But I think with most little kids, it's really just a lack of patience.

 

[septbride2002]

Okay I am ashamed to admitt this - when I was about 8 years old I swung my cat by her tail. At the time I was thinking she would like it. Ya know how as a kid you would have adults swing you around by your arms until you were dizzy? Well I use to LOVE doing that so I assumed my cat would as well. I can tell you my mother was not happy with me and I got in BIG trouble! She explained to me that I had hurt my kitty and that my kitty wouldn't love me any more if I continued to do that - then I cried. I think I couldn't realize that animals can hurt to since you never see them cry. And none of my animals at that time had ever been seriously injured either so I didn't think you could "hurt" an animal.

By the way I grew up completely adjusted and fine - I now own 3 beautiful cats who have never been swung by their tails.

~Amanda

 

[Southern4sure]

By the way I grew up completely adjusted and fine - I now own 3 beautiful cats who have never been swung by their tails.

~Amanda

Reading this cracked me up........

Southern4sure

 

[Christine]

When I was 4 or 5, I used to drag our cat around by the tail. Needless to say, I was scratched by the cat more than once. I don't know WHY I did this, WHY I was mean to that cat. But, I'm a huge animal lover now and have never even come close to being a serial killer.

 

[janette]

I think it's a different level of mean. There is a big difference between kicking a dog in frustration or swinging a cat to see what will happen and pulling the toenails out of their paw, or putting gasoline on them and lighting it, putting eyes out and other extremely cruel and premeditated acts of violence. Those are what they are referring too when they talk about kids that have become serial killers.

 

[Pete's Mom]

I think the age of the child really matters. IMHO, small children and pets do not mix. Both have bad days and they are bound to clash at some point.

I waited until Pete was almost 7 before we got a pet because I didn't want to take any chances. Of course, I sat down and explained to him what a responsibility it was and how we needed to take care of Luigi. So far, so good. They irritate each other from time to time, but they have never hurt each other. As a matter of fact, they play hide and seek a lot and Luigi "grooms" Pete while he sleeps.

I think sometimes it has to do with the parents. I have seen some children be mean to an animal in the presense of an adult who does nothing to intervene.

 

[minkydog]

Small children don't really have a lot of empathy. It takes years for them to learn to be kind and to think of others, including animals. I once caught my then-4yo son pulling the legs off baby frogs. Why? Because they were small enough to catch and the legs kinda went "pop." I know--ewwww. It never occured to him that the frogs felt pain or that their condition led to a slow, agonizing death. (Death? what's that?) I came down firmly, but kindly, on his behavior and he never did it again. He is now a very sweet 18yo that not only likes animals, but takes care of his severely disabled little brother. He would be horrified to think that I remember his frog-leg-pulling days.

 

[missypie]

Small children don't really have a lot of empathy. It takes years for them to learn to be kind and to think of others, including animals.

I was just going to say that people who hurt pets don't have much empathy. And as the prior poster said, small children don't have much of that. If a child is still hurting pets as they get older (at a developmental stage where they should understand the pain they are causing), then that should signal that some work on empathy may be needed.

 

[jacksonsmom]

I think sometimes it also has to do with parenting. Since my son was very small he has been told to RESPECT ALL animals. Even when he first started crawling if he even tried to pull the cat's ear/tail/etc he would get a firm "NO".
We always talk about how animals have feelings just like him. They feel pain, just like him.
He knows if I EVER catch him being mean to our cat or any other animal he will be in big trouble.

As far as the OP's orginial question, if the child is a young child (5 under) I just don't think they realize that animals can get hurt too. That is when the parents need to sit down with the child & talk about feelings & being kind to animals, just like most parents do if you catch your child hitting another child on the playground. Of course like most things, one time doesn't always do it, you have to keep reminding them.

If it is an older child, it gets tougher. If they keep abusing/hurting the animal then I think they are calling for help. If it is just a one time thing & it wasn't overly cruel then I think just a good talking too & reminding then that animals are living things too will do it.

I wish I knew WHY kids/adults abuse animals, just like I wish I knew why adults abuse children, that way maybe we could stop it.

 

[Snoopymom]

Thanks so much! I wanted to get ds a dog, since mine was literally my best friend when I was his age, but I think we will hold off until he is older.

He didn't seem to understand that he hurt the dog which shocked me because whenever we're in a stuffed animal isle at the store, he wants to take all the animals home so that they don't have to have all the "kids pulling at them and sleep on a cold shelf in the dark", but then when I think about it, maybe he's thinking of them as people/kids instead of animals, so what you all are saying about empathy makes sense.

I'm a first time mom and a major worrier, so I appreciated your replies. Thanks!

 

[vettechick99]

Not that I think we should blame the brain for actions that are clearly behavioral, but I feel that some people just don't understand how strong physiology is (of the brain specifically). For example, let's also consider that the younger brain hasn't developed enough for some emotions/thought processes. Here is a recent article that talks about how some kids just don't *think* or have yet the ability to really understand the consequences of their actions.

Brain Maturation

The new study found that the first areas to mature (e.g., extreme front and back of the brain) are those with the most basic functions, such as processing the senses and movement. Areas involved in spatial orientation and language (parietal lobes) follow. Areas with more advanced functions-- integrating information from the senses, reasoning and other "executive" functions (prefrontal cortex)--mature last.

This is also a great article...(am I allowed to note these here?)

Teenage Brain

They looked for signs of myelin, which would imply more mature, efficient connections, within gray matter. As expected, areas of the frontal lobe showed the largest differences between young adults and teens. This increased myelination in the adult frontal cortex likely relates to the maturation of cognitive processing and other "executive" functions. Parietal and temporal areas mediating spatial, sensory, auditory and language functions appeared largely mature in the teen brain. The observed late maturation of the frontal lobe conspicuously coincides with the typical age-of-onset of schizophrenia—late teens, early twenties—which, as noted earlier, is characterized by impaired "executive" functioning.

This basically explains why at 16 I had my first drink and thought it was a great idea to get behind the wheel. HELLOOO!!!

 

[totalia]

This will probably cause some people to be very angry with me. Just to warn you ahead of time.

I think that's kids don't have a conscience. Not until they get older. It's not that they enjoy doing horrible things, they just don't know any better. I think that conscience is something taught over time.

Kids will therefore do things that the rest of us consider horrible.

Some kids never develop conscience but most kids don't have any at all.