Why are some people so selfish and ungrateful?

[thelittlemermaid83]

Every year my Brother tells me what to get his GF and its always really expensive, now don't get me wrong I love buying gifts for my friends and family but being a single parent living on a strict budget i have to buy within my means. Also the fact that i despise this woman probably doesn't help much as I don't always look for the best present possible

Last year he told me to buy her some stupidly expensive perfume for around £40 and a game for her DS...yet again i told him to "get off on one" and I got her some bath set from boots. Her face Christmas day morning said it all (It was a nice present, but apparantly not to her taste )

I sent him a text at the weekend and asked him if i could get him and the GF a joint present and if that was ok is there any games on the wii they wanted. He text me back saying no she does not want a joint present and to get her the new Mario game, i told him that its £39.99 most places and there is no way i can afford to spend that on her as i haven't even spent that much on my parents this year.

He then got into a right strop and said i was being out of order and that his GF would be upset.

Am I being out of order? The old hag should be lucky she's getting anything from me. I don't want to lower myself to there standards but I feel like wrapping up a piece of coal for both of them and giving that to them as there presents.

I have explained that money is tight at the moment but they seem to think i'm loaded. If my brother thinks I'm going to use the pittance of maintenance money Ii get from DD's dad on his GF he must live in cloud cuckoo land.

Sorry for the rant , usually able to moan to my mum but shes poorly and she doesn't need the extra stress.

 

[mumloveseeyore]

how rude and ungrateful! presents should be regarded as what they are a gift and not compulsory, buy her what you can afford and if they dont like it then tough! so sorry you are having this stress! Gill

 

[Phil'sFrontier]

People are selfish and ungreatful because they were brought up that way!

 

[buzz for boys]

Moan away hun its very theraputic !
I have a brother where the scenerio is almost identical apart from its for my neice that the very expensive present request comes in !! Last year they requested that I bought her a disney store dress up costume cost me £55 xmas day i was told it was the wrong one she wanted the deluxe one at a mere £100 andthey bought each of my kids a selection pack when i said that didnt seem very fair to me they replied its about the giving and money was tight and I DO HAVE 4 KIDS.
Anyway this year to get round this dillemma where basically i spend money we havent got on my neice and ungrateful family we have decided that noone buys for each other - saves me the hassle of getting the wrong present and getting into trouble yet again Maybe you could try a similiar tact ????

 

[thelittlemermaid83]

People are selfish and ungreatful because they were brought up that way!

My Brother used to be a nice young man untill he met her

 

[thelittlemermaid83]

Moan away hun its very theraputic !
I have a brother where the scenerio is almost identical apart from its for my neice that the very expensive present request comes in !! Last year they requested that I bought her a disney store dress up costume cost me £55 xmas day i was told it was the wrong one she wanted the deluxe one at a mere £100 andthey bought each of my kids a selection pack when i said that didnt seem very fair to me they replied its about the giving and money was tight and I DO HAVE 4 KIDS.
Anyway this year to get round this dillemma where basically i spend money we havent got on my neice and ungrateful family we have decided that noone buys for each other - saves me the hassle of getting the wrong present and getting into trouble yet again Maybe you could try a similiar tact ????

Gosh thats awful, how can they expect you to spend XXX amount on your neice when they know you have 4 kids to also buy for?

I have told them again and again not to buy for me and if they do get Kyra something then don't spend alot.....to the GF its also about who buys my parents the best present. Obv i can't top Michael Buble tickets but I know my mum will love my gift whatever i get her.

 

[holcomb-mania]

Get her a dictionary so she can look up the definition for "gift."

 

[thelittlemermaid83]

Get her a dictionary so she can look up the definition for "gift."

 

[mandymouse]

I agree, it is very ungrateful. What I would suggest is telling them how much you can spend on them as a family, for example £60. Then say, they can either have one family gift for that price, or divide 3 ways so it's £20 each, and leave it up to them to decide

I hope it works out for you Em

 

[natalielongstaff]

Get her a dictionary so she can look up the definition for "gift."

priceless

 

[thelittlemermaid83]

I agree, it is very ungrateful. What I would suggest is telling them how much you can spend on them as a family, for example £60. Then say, they can either have one family gift for that price, or divide 3 ways so it's £20 each, and leave it up to them to decide

I hope it works out for you Em

Thats a good idea Mandy, I will sell that idea to them tomorrow and if she complains then lump of coal it is

 

[Tinks1984]

Oh that's terrible Sometimes I do wonder if people ever see anything more than presents for Christmas? To me it's more about spending time with people I love and don't get to be around as often as I'd like too. About meeting friends, family and having a good old knees up and having fun.

Christmas has become way to gift orientated IMO. And your brother and GF should be happy they're receiving anything at all, let alone demand what they want

I do like the dictionary idea

 

[mandymouse]

Thats a good idea Mandy, I will sell that idea to them tomorrow and if she complains then lump of coal it is

I hope she complains, I want you to send her a lump of coal

 

[Judy in Texas]

Make a donation to a charity in both their names and then give them a card stating what you've done. You are never going to make them happy so don't try. Last time I was in London was Red Poppy Day (not sure that's the appropriate name). Volunteers were taking donations for the UK Coast Guard. They would appreciate your $$. How about the local food bank? Put your money where it will do some good. At least you will know someone appreciated you.

 

[natalielongstaff]

Make a donation to a charity in both their names and then give them a card stating what you've done.

Thats a brilliant idea

 

[thelittlemermaid83]

I hope she complains, I want you to send her a lump of coal

I would have to film the moment she opened it, picture perfect moment

Make a donation to a charity in both their names and then give them a card stating what you've done. You are never going to make them happy so don't try. Last time I was in London was Red Poppy Day (not sure that's the appropriate name). Volunteers were taking donations for the UK Coast Guard. They would appreciate your $$. How about the local food bank? Put your money where it will do some good. At least you will know someone appreciated you.

Thats a really good idea, I will look into that.

 

[Nubbedy]

I hope she complains, I want you to send her a lump of coal

Oh, and me - that would just be priceless!

Agree with you though Emma, it's extremely ungrateful. It should be about thinking of someone and giving them a gift, not what the gift is and how much it cost.

 

[Jets fan]

I would be tempted to go to TK Maxx and get a set of coat hangers for her!

Tina

 

[tennisfan]

They are out of order, its the thought that counts not how much the gift costs. My sister & BIL have told me not to buy for them as I buy the kids more then enough but I will still get them a little gift to open on Xmas day as they are with us but even if I didn't they wouldn't mind.

I have been asked what I would like but the most expensive item I have chosen is a pair of boots which my parents will be getting me, my sister can get me a couple of books & I will be happy as anything.

I think your brother & mainly his GF need to remember the true meaning of the holidays.

Stick with your budget & if they don't like it tough. I have a full time job this year but I still budget for Christmas as i'm not going to stretch myself just for one day

The charity thing is a great idea though

 

[Chilly]

Sending you a hug