who wears the pants...really?! argh....

[disneyworldsk]

We all wear the pants Pete!
gotta call you out on this one (yes you Pete!) towards the end of this week's podcast! This poor guy Paul how you embarrassed him. I'm sure his wife wears a skirt too....?! tisk tisk. Come and follow me into 2021 and let's be equals, even if it seemed poor Paul fell into this one, he did not.
Come now men, women work and women wear pants and women sometimes are in charge in certain ways in relationships and that's okay too....1950......

 

[disneyland_is_magic]

I didn't mind it. Relationship humor is funny to me.

I will say I have notice though they seem to be taking a "Disney is safe" and it's fine to travel here but I notice few of them have left the state of Florida in the entire year to travel elsewhere. I think Craig rented a cabin somewhere in LA and that's the only one I can think of. So I do think Pete's joke fell flat, totally missing non-locals can't just spontaneously plan a weekend trip, because we need to build in quarantines on the pre and post sides of it. Pete says he doesn't eat indoors, and I fully respect that, but on a vacation I think that would be pretty unrealistic. So Pete teasing anyone, even in jest, is a little silly. Paul and his wife have already been to Florida recently so I know they feel comfortable traveling. But still, it's not a viable spontaneous, seat of your pants decision (too soon?) it once was for people.

So I think a good response for Paul, would have been a gentle ribbing back, "Well my boss says we can, when you hop on a plane and leave Florida, Pete."

 

[OfCourseTheresAlwaysMyWay]

Pete's comment also rubbed me the wrong way. Didn't jokes about women "wearing the pants" go out of fashion around 1991? Aren't we a little past that?

Do Paul and his wife not live in Florida? I'm not as familiar with him as I am with the other panelists.

I like the idea of having someone who doesn't live in Florida on the show. It would reflect the experience of visiting Disney World for what I suspect is a majority of the audience.

 

[sethschroeder]

Maybe I am out of the loop as never thought about it.

Now that you are bringing it up I understand your point of view. Can't say I have used that slang really before anyways.

Another one is someone being whipped in a relationship. Is there negative connotations to that saying that is somewhat similar but not exactly the same.

 

[The WDW 3]

I don’t think that it was a women working/providing joke that Pete was making. I
I thought it was funny.

 

[disneyworldsk]

Funny, can be yes, of course, and I am a lighthearted person, sexist jokes have been funny to many. However, I felt it threw Paul off and was awkward for him as a guest and as a listener it slighted me as a female. Unfortunately "it's just a joke" though can be offensive or hurt whoever the punch line is in that joke. Paul felt he had to defend himself and explain away his at home work schedule issues which was humbling.
Paul (not even sure who he is maybe not properly introduced) is new and to say oh hey you are so emasculated in your house your woman calls the shots is what the phrase means. which was funny back in the day, not so much in our times, archaeic ideology which can be funny to certain age points but not Paul's age and not the modern women of today.
Many old jokes from back in time were funny and still are to some, sure, but to perpetuate them with thousands listening to you on a popular medium is probably not a modern worldly choice I would go with for a host, it's sexist at the most, eye rolling to say the least for me. Hosts have great power in their words, phrasing, jokes so that should be pointed out when some things are said that are keeping women "in their place".

 

[SorcererHeidi]

I wasn't going to comment, but then I decided to. As with a lot of issues in life, I can see both sides of this. And that can be a positive at times, and can be a burden at other times. I will say I personally was not offended, but the more i think about it, the more my gut reaction that I did feel while watching was "Woah, that may not offend me personally, but may not have been the best thing to say" has grown. Not that I'm more offended, but the feeling it may not have been "smart" to say something like that on camera has grown the more I think about it.

I worked in male-dominated professions (and I use the word "dominated" as both a descriptor of quantities of gender, AND an adjective for general environments) my entire life, so had to grow a VERY thick skin, and put up with a LOT of "I was just joking" and "suck it up" attitudes, including LOTS of sexist - and sexual - attitudes and jokes - I would NOT have made it otherwise. And I even admit to participating at times, to "go along, to get along". It became so ingrained in me that when I would sometimes have others - female or not - point something out to me that had simply rolled off my back, it was always pretty much a shock, and was actually pretty embarrassing that others actually saw me as "weak, complicit, and complaint" with that type of behavior.

So - yeah - while it may not be offensive to me, as a single, strong, head of household my entire life female, maybe that's part of the problem?

And - last but not least - I did feel Paul's surprise and discomfort at the remark, and felt sorry, and uncomfortable for him. I, however, do NOT think Pete meant it with any malice, and would feel bad about it if anybody called it to his attention. He definitely does NOT strike me as mean-spirited, or a misogynist in the slightest (although I doubt you were trying to say that, knowing you as I do, @disneyworldsk ). I think it was just a misfired ribbing of a co-worker.

 

[TheMaxRebo]

I am generally not one that gets too bent out of shape by "jokes" like this - don't think they are a good thing but also feel there are worse things out there

That said, I do agree that there is significant power int he words that hosts with a platform use - and an opportunity there as well

As an example, a Fantasy Football podcast I listen to recognized they had a platform and made a conscious decision to change some of the words that they were using and were accepted in that community

I also fully agree with @SorcererHeidi that there was no mallace meant by Pete

 

[GeneralTso]

I see many fans on here idolize Pete and it's a little weird.
Pete! I need to hear your rant! Please rant!
He's just a guy, with a lot of very strong opinions. He's funny, he's a savvy business owner and a huge Disney fan and expert.
He also blows it sometimes and I've seen him own that.
He's an out, gay man and in my opinion, has very elevated and progressive views about human rights and gender issues. He made a comment that was "off" and it made his guest obviously uncomfortable. OK, so he's not perfect. He never claimed to be.

His regrettable comment bugged some people, me as well. I was surprised but I also know his intent is not to hurt and he is not a misogynist. His views on women and heck, the love he shows for his mother is clearly evidence on how he lives his life. This isn't some guy with a covert leaning against women.

I've said enough. I just get fed up sometime. He made a mistake. We all do. Recognize it and apologize and move forward. For those offended, same. Move forward.

 

[The WDW 3]

I assumed it was more of a sexual/sex comment than it was an equal rights comment. A man is seen as being the dominant one due to the basic physics of how sex works. I don’t think that he was saying that a women doesn’t deserve equal pay.

 

[SorcererHeidi]

Not even gonna go there.......

 

[disneyseniors]

Ah, come on, it was a funny comment! I think you are taking this too personally, IMO.

 

[disneyworldsk]

I wasn't going to comment, but then I decided to. As with a lot of issues in life, I can see both sides of this. And that can be a positive at times, and can be a burden at other times. I will say I personally was not offended, but the more i think about it, the more my gut reaction that I did feel while watching was "Woah, that may not offend me personally, but may not have been the best thing to say" has grown. Not that I'm more offended, but the feeling it may not have been "smart" to say something like that on camera has grown the more I think about it.

I worked in male-dominated professions (and I use the word "dominated" as both a descriptor of quantities of gender, AND an adjective for general environments) my entire life, so had to grow a VERY thick skin, and put up with a LOT of "I was just joking" and "suck it up" attitudes, including LOTS of sexist - and sexual - attitudes and jokes - I would NOT have made it otherwise. And I even admit to participating at times, to "go along, to get along". It became so ingrained in me that when I would sometimes have others - female or not - point something out to me that had simply rolled off my back, it was always pretty much a shock, and was actually pretty embarrassing that others actually saw me as "weak, complicit, and complaint" with that type of behavior.

So - yeah - while it may not be offensive to me, as a single, strong, head of household my entire life female, maybe that's part of the problem?

And - last but not least - I did feel Paul's surprise and discomfort at the remark, and felt sorry, and uncomfortable for him. I, however, do NOT think Pete meant it with any malice, and would feel bad about it if anybody called it to his attention. He definitely does NOT strike me as mean-spirited, or a misogynist in the slightest (although I doubt you were trying to say that, knowing you as I do, @disneyworldsk ). I think it was just a misfired ribbing of a co-worker.

correct. of course Pete is never mean or malicious, not in his dna.
but well said regarding your own experiences, so personal and how you wrote it well written and things maybe you say at home as 'funny' shouldn't be perpetuated to the new world of modernist feminism on camera with a larger audience.
Thank you for sharing

 

[disneyland_is_magic]

Just come back to say, Heidi, as always you resonated with me greatly. I do agree, thinking about it further last night I had the same reaction as you. I still wouldn't say I am offended, but it caused me to reflect and my reaction is different then what I first said. Thank you for being open and thoughtful and well, you.

I do agree Pete meant absolutely no harm, but it doesn't sit well now that it's been pointed out to me. That said, if Paul and retorted or laughed it off I would probably still say it was nothing. And is that right or wrong I would change my reaction based on that?

 

[The WDW 3]

Ah, come on, it was a funny comment! I think you are taking this too personally, IMO.

this!

 

[The WDW 3]

Not even gonna go there.......

well..

 

[Tiggerette]

Not even gonna go there.......

I..... can't..... resist! Y'all, while rock crushes scissors, we know that when paper covers rock, paper is dominant. It's less about physics and more about point of view. *okay... that's out of my system*

SorcererHeidi... your signature makes me want to make a casserole. Thanks for the thought provoking culinary sig!

To the idea of intent during the podcast... I do enjoy supporting persons who overall try to make the world a better for everyone. Of course, as humans we're going to have our foibles. Pete has often used depricating humor, and I'm not a fan. It's different than Kevin's acerbic wit. That said, I can disagree with that behaviour without labeling someone. I also see the good sides that Pete offers on his platform: he really dives deep in the causes he believes in, he seems very loyal, he does speak out when there is injustice for marginalized groups. We can all improve, myself included. I welcome difficult feedback, so I can better understand how I can be a more postively impactful person. We are all "works in progress" and sometimes we're also quite happy to stay in whatever place of progress we are in. In that spirit, I affirm the DISteam (and anyone reading this thread) can ignore it, can reflect on it (and then ignore it), reflect and make an adjustment, or any combo. Behaviour is life-long personal journey. Glad to be with y'all on the way.

 

[AlexMouse]

I just watched that episode yesterday, and as soon as Pete made the joke I immeidately thought "oh boy... here come the comments..." Not because I thought there was really an issue there but because these days everyone is offended by everything regardless of intent.

Yes, I know, I'm just an old guy who has the unpopular opinion that we've gone too far with the snowflake culture, but still: sometimes a humorous metaphor is just a humorous metaphor.

There are so many much more important things to get offended about.

 

[PamNC]

went back to listen - I agree Pete didn't mean any harm. I wasn't offended at all by this comment but of course we are all different. It didn't even occur to me which is why I went back to see if I missed something. Pete was just being funny/joking.

 

[disneyworldsk]

went back to listen - I agree Pete didn't mean any harm. I wasn't offended at all by this comment but of course we are all different. It didn't even occur to me which is why I went back to see if I missed something. Pete was just being funny/joking.

Again, of course no harm , he isn't mean or malicious or set out to be hurt anyone. And yes, being funny and joking is of course what he is thinking, which to many is very funny yes. I hate to repeat my OP so I won't , waste people's time, just pointing out something that I did not find funny and why but won't repeat....