Who didn't wear a wedding dress? Thanks for the idea, C. Ann!

[KJ Luvs Pluto]

I wore a prom dress. Twenty seven years later, I'm still married to the same man so the dress or the type of wedding just doesn't really matter in the long run.

That being said - AshleyW - love the dress picture, that would be very pretty for a wedding.

 

[themilesfamily]

My aunt wore a beautiful blue suit. She carried yellow daffodils. She looked beautiful.

She said she could either have the big white wedding OR brand-new furniture for her house. She picked the furniture.

Now her mom was extremely disappointed and sad about that -- she wanted to see her daughter be a traditional bride. But my aunt was pretty determined to do things how she wanted.

 

[WeLoveLilo05]

So then why haven't you? As you can see from this thread, it doesn't have to be anything big or traditional. It could even by during lunch break from work with a JP.

I say you need to talk to him or just go out and start planning that beach wedding. Is it him or you that hasn't made any moves yet?

Well I don't even know where to begin really, my dad said he would pay for a small wedding at that mentioned place. Fiance keeps asking me to do all the research but isn't that something we are supposed to do together, and since my dad offered to pay shouldn't he be there to to talk about the money aspect of it?

 

[Imzadi]

Well I don't even know where to begin really, my dad said he would pay for a small wedding at that mentioned place. Fiance keeps asking me to do all the research but isn't that something we are supposed to do together, and since my dad offered to pay shouldn't he be there to to talk about the money aspect of it?

You are talking about two MEN here. Some of them really aren't into all the frou-frou stuff. Sounds like you got your ideas of how planning weddings should go from all those bridal magazines. There is no wrong way to plan your own wedding - if you get it to happen and everyone is really on board about it & happy.

What I hear is you have two men on board who want YOU to do the initial research, then bring them the finalized 5-10 favorite picks. They don't want to get into all the preliminary stuff. They don't know the difference between ivory, ecru and white napkins and that a ruffled hem could be $10 more a batch than the plain hem. You narrow it down to the top 4-5 choices then bring it to DF to make the final decisions.

Then you go to Dad and say, "Dad these are the choices we are thinking about and they come in these prices..." Then let him have a heart attack about the prices, or be happy about choice C, etc. He can't give you a money estimate right now, since you have no research in front of you. What if your perfect small wedding is $3000 more than the price he pulled out of thin air. You are afraid to tell him, and he really would pay for it, but he just didn't know what the prices are? They want YOU to do some research.

If you find DF begins dragging his butt about your choices and preliminary plans, like it's really been all talk for 5 years, you'll soon know. Then you have different decisions to make about your future. . . But, it doesn't sound like that is what's going on.

I see you are in Jersey. Remember, we tend to have more elaborate weddings (even the smaller ones,) than down south, or in other regions. (There were old threads where they do things waaaay differently.) So, when you are making your preliminary plans, do say to DF, "Do we pare down on this? Should we have this at all?"

 

[PrincessSuzanne]

Well I don't even know where to begin really, my dad said he would pay for a small wedding at that mentioned place. Fiance keeps asking me to do all the research but isn't that something we are supposed to do together, and since my dad offered to pay shouldn't he be there to to talk about the money aspect of it?

My Dh preferred to be left out of all that stuff. He went to choose a suit and our bands and I think that was it, everthign was up to me and mom and he liked it that way. I don't really understand these men that want to be apart of all the wedding stuff.

There were already to many hands in my wedding with DH's father and step-mother planning the rehearsal dinner at a place we didn't even like.

But, if I had to do it all over again, we would hav gotten married on a Sunday afternoon either after morning services or just prior to evening services in our church. Very few people showed up and it just seemed a waste to me after it was over, even though we didn't spend alot of money.

OP, I did wear a traditional dress, one of a kind, but it wasn't expensive at all ($200). A friend of the family made it.

Suzanne

 

[kafitty]

Well I don't even know where to begin really, my dad said he would pay for a small wedding at that mentioned place. Fiance keeps asking me to do all the research but isn't that something we are supposed to do together, and since my dad offered to pay shouldn't he be there to to talk about the money aspect of it?

check out one of my absolutely FAVORITEST blogs ever, offbeatbride . com...LOTS of people doing thing there that are way "different", and more often than not, on the cheap!

also, lots of non-traditional wedding garb there!

 

[WeLoveLilo05]

I guess I just didn't want to do everything alone, kwim. My mom is not a planner, gets nervous about parties and things. For example, of all my mom's 3 kids none of us had a graduation party from either 8th grade or HS. I am actually graduating college in May and we're not doing anything, not that I mind, like I said don't like being center of attention, but thats just the way it is lol.

 

[Silent1CB]

I guess I just didn't want to do everything alone, kwim. My mom is not a planner, gets nervous about parties and things. For example, of all my mom's 3 kids none of us had a graduation party from either 8th grade or HS. I am actually graduating college in May and we're not doing anything, not that I mind, like I said don't like being center of attention, but thats just the way it is lol.

Actually, think of how LUCKY you are that you don't have all these other people pushing their ideas & expectations on to you; and trying to make everyone else happy. You get to plan it how YOU want it. Trust me. LUCKY!!!!!!

 

[Tinkermommy]

I got married by a JOP in an ivory suit. We were very young and had no money. I often tell people I got married for under $50.

DH and I will be married 23 years in June. I have NO regrets about having a big wedding. The wedding is one day but the marriage is forever.

 

[luvsJack]

First wedding: the big, antebellum style white wedding gown. Big church wedding.

Second wedding: Western style skirt, cowboy boots and a western shirt matching dh's. Small wedding at the preacher's home with just family. "Reception" was a big party afterwards at a local night club with a country band.

I remember more about the second wedding and enjoyed it a LOT more.

 

[Northstar]

I wore the fanciest dress I have ever had on my body. Dark red velvet, short, with a plunging back. It cost me all of $250... and that's the most I have ever spent on a dress in my life either!

Small, small wedding, just after moving to a city thousands of miles away from anyone I knew, which gave me a great excuse to keep it to close family and a few lifelong friends. I couldn't wait to get it over with. I also hate being the center of attention, and things like deciding on what kinds of napkins and ribbons and colors and flowers make my eyes glaze over... so going back to the dress, I went into a fancy dress shop, looked over the rack of stuff in my size, and picked out the one I liked best. Took me about 30 minutes including trying on.

Okay, I know I'm abnormal. But I was very happy with my wedding!

 

[MMmomto5]

We were married by a JOP too. I wore a pretty sundress and he wore khaki pants and a dress shirt. We didn't even plan on inviting anyone. Our daugter was 9 months old when we got married and we just wanted the three of us there. In the end we invited our parents and they took us out to dinner that night. I didn't miss all the traditional wedding stuff, and after I planned my aunt's wedding for 260 people, I was glad I didn't put myself through that.

We've always said we would renew our vows on our 15th Anniversary with a real ceremony. Not necessarily a traditional wedding(that seems silly to me now), but more like a renewal on a beach or now that we have become Disney freaks, maybe a renewal ceremony with all 5 of our kids there and a trip to the parks after.

 

[Acklander]

If this is too personal you don't have to answer, jc, those who were married by justice of the peace do you regret NOT having a big wedding?

Never regretted it, even for a moment. I always joked that the reason why I eloped was because of a fear of being stood up at the alter.
I know that a lot of people who say that they're shy so prefer to elope or have a very small wedding, but I'm the exact opposite. I've always been very comfortable being the life of the party and have no problems with standing in front of a crowd, but I think with the marriage I wanted it to be about us, and our marriage,almost as if it were too personal to share with others. I never wanted it to be about the dress, or the party, or all the chaos and stress that goes along with it. I just wanted it to be about the two of us together.

 

[Pooh67_68]

I had a small (150 people) traditional wedding, with big puffy dress. If I had to do it over again I would elope, too many people trying to tell me what to do.




WeLoveLilo my DH did no planning with me, he just said tell me when and where and I will be there.

 

[tae1218]

I had a small (150 people) traditional wedding, with big puffy dress. If I had to do it over again I would elope, too many people trying to tell me what to do.


I feel the same way. If we had to do it over, it would be us on a beach in the caribbean.

 

[m&m's mom]

My wedding dress was an Aracnia, the Black Widow bride, dress. It was black w/ lots of lace "spider webs" all over it. We did have a Halloween wedding after all. MY DH was in a Capt Hook outfit.
1st marriage for both of us but we had been together for 11 years, owned a house together for 10 and had 2 kids before we remembered we forgot to get married along the way.
We would not change one little thing about it. It suited our personalities. Our little DD's were Minnie Mouse and the baby was a Disney Princess.
My sweet Mom has our wedding picture right next to my siblings tranditional wedding pictures.

 

[My sister's princess]

DH and I just got married this January
I wore a "wedding dress", but it was tea length, so not the most traditional.