Who asked for YOUR input???

[joybeth]

December 15 was the last day of our vacation and we spent a wonderful day at EPCOT. My daughter is in her second year of college and recently discovered that she likes sushi. My sister was nice enough to treat us to sushi at Tokyo Dining for our last meal before heading out on ME. We had just started enjoying all of the beautiful sushi rolls when my daughter wondered aloud what the orange stuff was. Well, my sister and I were well aware that it was roe, but I knew that if we shared that detail while we were eating to my picky eater daughter she would not eat any more. We just sort of changed the subject. Just then the couple next to us were getting up to leave. The young woman leaned over to my daughter and said "it's fish eggs, I know because I used to work at a Japanese resteraunt!" My daughter looked at her in horror and the woman said "I know, isn't that gross!"

Needless to say my daughter pushed her plate away and didn't eat another bite. My sister planned this lunch especially for my daughter. This stranger's input spoiled our last meal on our vacation.

Why did she think this comment would add any "magic" to our day? ugh!

jb

 

[disneyjunkie]

I bet she didn't mean any harm. She was trying to be helpful. I may have done the same thing. To be honest, it would have never occured to me that a 19/20 year old may react the way your daughter did.

 

[meliss8599]

She probably thought neither of you knew what it was b/c neither one of you provided her w/an answer. I'm sure she only thought she was being helpful, providing someone with a little tidbit of knowledge.

I know it's upsetting and it's a shame she ruined sushi for your daughter but I'd be completely floored if that was her actual intention. FWIW, I stopped drinking milk for the longest time b/c a teacher told us how much bacteria (even though it was good) floats around in milk. I got over it in time just as your DD may.

 

[vicki_c]

Some people just have to stick their noses in where they don't belong. That stinks. We have the same type of issue with one of our kids and food - and I would have been really mad if someone did that to me.

 

[MichelleVW]

December 15 was the last day of our vacation and we spent a wonderful day at EPCOT. My daughter is in her second year of college and recently discovered that she likes sushi. My sister was nice enough to treat us to sushi at Tokyo Dining for our last meal before heading out on ME. We had just started enjoying all of the beautiful sushi rolls when my daughter wondered aloud what the orange stuff was. Well, my sister and I were well aware that it was roe, but I knew that if we shared that detail while we were eating to my picky eater daughter she would not eat any more. We just sort of changed the subject. Just then the couple next to us were getting up to leave. The young woman leaned over to my daughter and said "it's fish eggs, I know because I used to work at a Japanese resteraunt!" My daughter looked at her in horror and the woman said "I know, isn't that gross!"

Needless to say my daughter pushed her plate away and didn't eat another bite. My sister planned this lunch especially for my daughter. This stranger's input spoiled our last meal on our vacation.

Why did she think this comment would add any "magic" to our day? ugh!

jb

I bet she didn't mean any harm. She was trying to be helpful. I may have done the same thing. To be honest, it would have never occured to me that a 19/20 year old may react the way your daughter did.

Seriously, I probably would have done the same thing..

 

[chartle]

The woman was probably just trying to be helpful.

Also the couple probably didn't have any kids so they didn't pick up on your "change the subject" tactic.

If they did and still made the comment then yes they were trying to stir up trouble which they didn't have a right too.

Thats the job for people like older brothers.

 

[disneyjunkie]

Some people just have to stick their noses in where they don't belong. That stinks. We have the same type of issue with one of our kids and food - and I would have been really mad if someone did that to me.[/QU But the OPs daughter is an adult not a kid.

 

[MichelleVW]

Some people just have to stick their noses in where they don't belong. That stinks. We have the same type of issue with one of our kids and food - and I would have been really mad if someone did that to me.

The Op's DD is not a child....she is an adult. I don't see the big deal.

 

[joybeth]

I bet she didn't mean any harm. She was trying to be helpful. I may have done the same thing. To be honest, it would have never occured to me that a 19/20 year old may react the way your daughter did.

I didn't think that she meant any harm, but I think it is in bad taste to insert yourself into a conversation that you were evesdropping and to make a comment about the food being gross. It's not something I would do.

I guess it's just me..

 

[sjs314]

It is a shame that your daughters meal was ruined by another patron who was just trying to be helpful. I also would not have expected a woman of college age to have that type of reaction, I have to wonder if the woman had said caviar instead of fish eggs if your daughters reaction might have been different?
I know my one Ddil "suddenly" now loves sushi, and she is one of the pickiest eaters in the world, but sushi is the new "in" food with the 25-35 age group it seems.

I honestly do not think the woman meant any harm at all.

 

[GovieMom]

She probably thought neither of you knew what it was b/c neither one of you provided her w/an answer. I'm sure she only thought she was being helpful, providing someone with a little tidbit of knowledge.

I agree. And it's too bad your daughter stopped eating after that. I can see a younger child doing that maybe, but since your daughter's an adult I'm sure the person meant no harm.

 

[DisneyRookie2007]

No harm was intended, especially since you didn't volunteer an answer yourself.

 

[vicki_c]

I didn't think that she meant any harm, but I think it is in bad taste to insert yourself into a conversation that you were evesdropping and to make a comment about the food being gross. It's not something I would do.

I guess it's just me..

For this reason - child, adult - whatever - it's rude to interject yourself into someone else's conversation. So to me:

1 - eavesdropping - rude, but most of us do it
2 - putting yourself in someone's conversation - uninvited - bad manners
3 - making a comment of the nature she did - even worse.

 

[WDSearcher]

OK ... first off ... who takes a picky eater to a sushi restaurant?

Secondly ... not a child. Most 20-ish YOs I know would have either known what the orange stuff was or, after finding out, would have scraped it off and continued enjoying their sushi. They wouldn't have pushed away the plate and pouted.

I would imagine that the other person was simply sharing some knowledge, the very same way most of us say we share knowledge about Disney with total strangers. I mean, if you had been standing in line somewhere and this very same person had "butted in" to tell you a new secret they'd discovered about getting into the first row at Soarin' or how to speed up an online reservation, you probably wouldn't have cared at all that they offered up their unsolicited input.

It's not like the person was sitting there thinking, "ooooooh ... I know! Let's totally ruin this person's last day by telling them they're eating fish eggs!!" Come on. Lighten up.

The stranger didn't spoil your last meal. You let it spoil your last meal.

 

[catne]

I started to agree the woman was probably just trying to be helpful...right up until she injected the comment that the food was gross. It is never helpful to tell someone the food they are currently eating is gross. That's rude by any etiquette maven's definition. It's also rude to eavesdrop, and generally it's considered rude to eavesdrop & then intrude on private conversation you're overhearing. If you have to eavesdrop, at least pretend you're not listening!

So no, she wasn't being helpful...she was being rude.

As far as whether or not the info recipient's age should have any bearing on the subject. No. There are plenty of adults who are perfectly happy to try new things as long as they do not know what they are. (Two of my adult kids (22 and 32 yrs old) are like that, as well as a 50-something friend, and a 60-something relative also fall in this category.) I always figure it's better to be ignorant-adventurous than to just flat-out refuse to try new foods, lol.

 

[pickles]

I guess, since I am a picky eater ,I am more offended by the fact you were willing to trick and lie to your child(and really now friend aged person) than the honest(tho unwanted opinion of the person next to her)


If I had been in your daughters shoes I probably would have gotten up and walked out once I found out you were trying to trick me. who does that to someone they love?

Whole world always feels like its their job to get a picky eater to eat things they dont like or dont want to like

If your daughter is eating sushi she isnt that picky in my book!!

 

[Max Webster]

Why did she think this comment would add any "magic" to our day? ugh!

jb

I bet the lady did that to ruin your daughter's magical vacation. Some people just plain stink. Sometimes I get so mad I just want to spit!



Max

 

[LuvLDM]

The things that people let irritate them is astonishing to me.

 

[joybeth]

OK ... first off ... who takes a picky eater to a sushi restaurant?

Secondly ... not a child. Most 20-ish YOs I know would have either known what the orange stuff was or, after finding out, would have scraped it off and continued enjoying their sushi. They wouldn't have pushed away the plate and pouted.

I would imagine that the other person was simply sharing some knowledge, the very same way most of us say we share knowledge about Disney with total strangers. I mean, if you had been standing in line somewhere and this very same person had "butted in" to tell you a new secret they'd discovered about getting into the first row at Soarin' or how to speed up an online reservation, you probably wouldn't have cared at all that they offered up their unsolicited input.

It's not like the person was sitting there thinking, "ooooooh ... I know! Let's totally ruin this person's last day by telling them they're eating fish eggs!!" Come on. Lighten up.

The stranger didn't spoil your last meal. You let it spoil your last meal.

First of all, my daughter has enjoyed sushi in the past and requested to have sushi on our trip. We didn't just take her somewhere that she didn't want to go. Sushi can contain exotic ingrediants such as eel, or it can be pretty westernized like a California roll.

If the woman was trying to be so helpful I would expect her to use the correct term such as "fish roe" or even cavier, NOT fish eggs. And to follow it up by calling it "gross" she was obviously trying to get a reaction, not being helpful.

There was no pouting that went on....the day was not ruined.... Some "helpful" stranger just put a damper on what had been a fun meal.

I think it is totally different share helpful or interesting items with other people and I have done so frequently. There is a difference between telling a fellow diner that there desert looks beautiful, as opposed they are "eating fish eggs, GROSS!"

If you can't see the difference then you must be one of "those" people.

jb

 

[DaisyMaisie]

I would not expect an apparent adult eating raw fish to be grossed out by fish caviar. I also would not refer to someone's food as gross. As far as inserting oneself into the conversation if you were speaking loudly enough to be accidentally overheard I don't have a problem with it at someplace like Disney World. I would probably say "excuse me I could not help but overhear that is fish eggs...like caviar."

If your daughter has some kind of egg aversion, why not try telling her not to eat it in the first place.

On the bright side at least this happened with family at not when she was out with adult friends. Imagine if she was eating caviar, someone told her what it was and she spit it out...

I can see avoiding the truth about what they are eating with a four year old (and even then if they liked it I would probably tell them what it is afterward). But by not telling your daughter the truth you are setting her up to have the same thing happen when she ends up eating sushi in a situation you can't control in the future. Can you imagine if she told a date or boss she loved sushi, and then refused to eat it half way through? There is roe on the outside of simple rolls that she might encounter in an office party situation etc.