When were you last victim of a mommy driveby

[testifyoncruises]

DP and I were at dinner at a crowded restaurant last night. DD, 6, had to go to the bathroom and we let her go on her own.

A mother came by our table and spouted off that she could not believe we would let a child as young as our DD go to the bathroom by herself. She went on to spout all these "what if's". DP and I looked at her and told her that we do not live our life on what if's and told her basically to go pound sand.

DD came back proud she had gone by herself and for remembering to wash AND dry her hands.

Hates mommy drivebys.

 

[Jennasis]

Uh oh...here it comes.

How you doin' ToC?

 

[npmommie]

Never been a victim of a mommy drive by, nor would I ever do a mommy drive by.
BUT, you can tell me to pound sand too if you want, but I would never let my 6 yo go to the bathroom alone in a crowded restaurant.

I would at the very least have to go along to check out the condition of the bathroom, ladies bathrooms are notoriously dirty places

plus I do think 6 is a little young to go off alone in a crowded place.
jmo

 

[MizTink]

DP and I were at dinner at a crowded restaurant last night. DD, 6, had to go to the bathroom and we let her go on her own.

A mother came by our table and spouted off that she could not believe we would let a child as young as our DD go to the bathroom by herself. She went on to spout all these "what if's". DP and I looked at her and told her that we do not live our life on what if's and told her basically to go pound sand.

DD came back proud she had gone by herself and for remembering to wash AND dry her hands.

Hates mommy drivebys.

no words, just......... and and

 

[HelenePA]

Ut oh... I let my 4 yr old son go to the bathroom alone the other day at Friendly's! In the mens room and all! I did watch him to in the door and then went back to our table to wait for him... Guess what? he made it back just fine!

 

[JESW]

Add me to the camp of Moms who would never let their 6 year old go to the bathroom alone in a crowded restaurant. I would have been the Mom watching your kid to make sure she was ok and wondering why someone let her go off alone. I would survive your "pound sand" comment .....and never mind, I won't add anything else .................

 

[cheermom1]

you know I think it is great that you are letting her do things on her own...I remember when I was a kid and I HATED i mean HATED it when my mom would go with me. I was mortified

I HAD to do everything on my own..my dd is the same way and I LET her b.c I remember how I felt and see the pride on my kids faces when they do something that they are so proud of doing...

 

[npmommie]

you know I think it is great that you are letting her do things on her own...I remember when I was a kid and I HATED i mean HATED it when my mom would go with me. I was mortified

I HAD to do everything on my own..my dd is the same way and I LET her b.c I remember how I felt and see the pride on my kids faces when they do something that they are so proud of doing...

at least walking them to the door, isn't interfering with their ability to go in pee, and wash their hands on their own, then you are there to see that they get out no problems.

watching out for our kids is not hindering them in any way.

a 6 yo has a tiny butt, what if they are in there and have a problem??
who is going to help them?

 

[Acklander]

don't you love it when your kids are so proud of themselves??? They just beam

Another one here who lets my child go to the bathroom by himself.

 

[princesspiglet]

I often let my DD7 go to the bathroom by herself and have done so since she was 5. I always watch her go in and wait at the table and watch her come back out. She is always proud to go by herself and I am not going to be a helicopter parent. Now, I would not let her go say at a concert or large venue area, but at a local resturant? Sure, no problem.

 

[PRmamiDEdos]

It's hard trying to get your kids to be independent beings. I'm so afraid to let them go to the bathroom on their own. I will if we are close by and we can see who's going in and out and we also keep track of the time they're in there. I remember my sister and I being able to walk away from my parents in a restaurant when we were young but we live in different times.

 

[mickeyboat]

My DDs go to the bathroom without me, and have been doing it for since they were about that age. I generally have them go together, though. I don't live my life in fear that my child is going to be stolen from a restaurant bathroom in my town. I also don't worry that they will face an unsurmoutable problem in the bathroom. They don't need my help at home, I don't know why they would need help in a restaurant?

 

[Minnesota!]

I am just starting to let my son go into the bathrooms alone (he is 5.5). He doesn't want to be in the women's with me anymore than I want him in there. So I will walk him to the door and let him go, or if I can see the bathroom, I will let him go alone. If DH is along, DH goes in with him, anyway, because 9/10 he has to go, too.

You did nothing wrong.

At 6, a child should be able to do everything they "need" to do in the bathroom without any help. Getting on/off the stool, wiping, washing/drying hands.

All we are working on now is getting DS to understand that he doesn't need to make conversation with the men at the urinals, lol!

 

[keerymom]

 

[MizTink]

at least walking them to the door, isn't interfering with their ability to go in pee, and wash their hands on their own, then you are there to see that they get out no problems.

watching out for our kids is not hindering them in any way.

a 6 yo has a tiny butt, what if they are in there and have a problem??
who is going to help them?

help "doing their business" isn't why they need someone else with them.
there are just too many pervs and weirdos out there. i don't even like to let my dd11 go alone! at least a friend or sister goes. at least just to make sure no one else is in there already, or to be there if someone comes in before she's out. UNLESS this is a 1 person bathroom, then even little ones can go on their own.

 

[testifyoncruises]

I often let my DD7 go to the bathroom by herself and have done so since she was 5. I always watch her go in and wait at the table and watch her come back out. She is always proud to go by herself and I am not going to be a helicopter parent. Now, I would not let her go say at a concert or large venue area, but at a local resturant? Sure, no problem.

It was funnny. We were on a cruise last week and not once did we accompany her from the table to the bathroom. People at the table were so complimentary of how we are raising our child. She always made it back just fine. It was in a local place of all things where this mommy driveby occurred.

DD knows what to do if grabbed to get people to pay attention. I am sure we would tell others to go pound sand if they commented on this or how we let our DD play out in our front yard by herself and ride her bike around the block by herself.

If we didn't live off the bottom of a hill, she would be riding her bike to swim practice without us as of last year, but people do drive way too fast down the hill and there are no sidewalks.

But a restroom visit, no big deal to us at all.

I am just curious as when was the last time others were victims of a mommy drive-by and how did you respond?

 

[testifyoncruises]

there are just too many pervs and weirdos out there.

But statistically there just aren't. There is less crime now than in years past.

 

[princesspiglet]

My DDs go to the bathroom without me, and have been doing it for since they were about that age. I generally have them go together, though. I don't live my life in fear that my child is going to be stolen from a restaurant bathroom in my town. I also don't worry that they will face an unsurmoutable problem in the bathroom. They don't need my help at home, I don't know why they would need help in a restaurant?[/QUOTE]

ITA!

 

[Nik's Mom]

I guess it all depends on what part of the country you are from. I'm originally from California, where all you hear are tragic stories of kids getting kidnapped or raped. I certainly would not let my child go to a public bathroom alone at that age. I remember several years back, a 12 year old boy was murdered in a public restroom. His aunt walked him to the door and let him go in alone. She had no idea that there was some maniac in there who was waiting for a victim so he could slit their throat. I think this happened in San Diego. Now, I know that the chances of that happening are slim, but that story was so horrific that I know I wouldn't send my kid in a restroom alone unless I had no other choice.

It seems like the worst stories come out of California. I can tell you about a 5 year old that was kidnapped, raped and murdered. When she was kidnapped, she was playing in her own front yard. I could go on and on with these type of stories. There are some sick and twisted people out there.

Now that we live in Kansas, I see little kids playing outside and walking home from school all alone. It's rare that you hear stories of kidnappings, etc around here, so parents don't give it a second thought. But I certainly wouldn't pounce on that parent and lecture them. It's their kid and their choice.

Now to answer your question as to when I was a victim of a drive-by parent. I don't think I ever have been approached like that. That parent had a lot of nerve to approach the op. Like I said, it's your kid and your choice.

 

[lovesmurfs]

Oh, I learned! When DS was 5, we let him go into the bathroom alone at TGI Fridays. Our table was right next to the restroom, so we figured it was "safe."

Apparently, there was a drunken guy in there, who has having some difficulty hitting the urinal. From what we learned (from the drunken guy), DS commented that he needed to be more careful lmao.

Nothing happened, and drunken guy thought it was so funny that he paid our waitress to bring a milkshake for DS. What "could have happened" was so clear to me that we never let him go alone again.

DD is 10 and I still usually go into the restroom with her. I consider DH and myself fairly relaxed in terms of thinking of "what could happen" but not in this case.

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ETA: I am guilty of once doing a mommy driveby, and would do so again. The woman with the shopping cart in front of me at a grocery store had given her 9 month old (or so) a plastic bag to play with in line and wasn't paying any attention to her daughter.