When to make unwilling kid ride?

[mickeyluv'r]

"since the dawn of recoded history, we've been inventing the future one step at a time.
So let's travel back in time together. I'll show you how our ancestors created the world we know today, and then it will be your turn to create the world of tomorrow...
The ancient Greeks were great inventors of the future....With lessons learned from the Greeks, the Romans create a powerful empire...
To send a man to the moon, we had to invent a new language....
After 30,000 years of time travel, here we are...poised to shape the future of this, our Spaceship Earth....I do know [the future] will be quite an adventure....

 

[Turn the Page]

I weighed in on this earlier but I'm going to change my stance just a bit.

I have been thinking about what we should do if DD5 decides she doesn't want to go on certain rides. She has never been any rides other than those that we have at the county fair (and something akin to the Texas State Fair it is not). We're talking kiddie rides here. She has never been on anything remotely resembling a roller coaster. So, our first day at MK I plan to take her on Barnstormer pretty early on and see how she does with it. If she doesn't like it, I will not make her go on BTMRR, SM, or anything like that.

That said, if she decides she doesn't want to go on IASW the Little Mermaid ride, or Winnie the Pooh......sorry kid, you're going. It will depend on what I know of the ride. I know there is absolutely nothing on either of those rides for her to be afraid of. We will play HM and Dinosaur by ear but the rest of the dark rides, especially those in Fantasyland, that involve nothing she is afraid of, she is going. Unless she develops new fears out of the blue in the next seven days of course.

 

[mickeyluv'r]

This is one of those threads where some see the glass as half full, and others see half empty.
There is a difference between true trauma/panic attacks and stretching your comfort zone.

But I say again, one of the most pervasive themes in all of WDW is the idea that risk=reward. I mean that's practically the theme of every fairy tale ever written.

"Any wish is possible all it takes is a little courage to set it free....
When you wish upon a star, your dreams come true."

 

[niffer5150]

the rule for us was always that you have to try something at least once before you make any proclamations. nothing at disney is going to hurt you as long as you follow the rules. everyone in our home pretty grounded in reality and reason so fear rarely gets a foothold when it comes to rides. the only thing kiddo didn't like was space mountain but she would still ride it because "it's just a few minutes long. i can do anything for just a few minutes." she still shut her eyes tho. however, forcing a sobbing, hysterical child on a ride isn't going to help. they need REAL help like coping skills or careful desensitization.

 

[DaniMoon]

Try it, you might like it. My son willingly went on Tower of Terror, but Spaceship Earth freaked him out. The only ride he has said he will NOT go on again this trip is Dinosaur.

YouTube has been helpful. Fear of the unknown is a biggie for him, so seeing what to expect helps a ton. Also, we are taking ear plugs along this time, as we've come to realize that things are just too loud for him. So hoping that helps, too.

I do push, but don't force.

 

[mickeyluv'r]

I'll also second the idea of giving kids TOOLS to conquer their fears. Most ride effects can be easily reduced simply by covering your ears or closing your eyes, and laughter. Teaching your kids to laugh at the special effects is one of the most powerful tools in the world!

There's a fine line between making allowances and teaching kids to fear/avoid harmless fun. To me, projecting unnecessary fear on children is just as damaging as kids thinking they are immortals. Both extremes are dangerous.

I've LOVED the Haunted Mansion since I was a kid myself.

Now conversely, one of my elders witnessed an actual gruesome accident on a broken amusement ride as a kid! So he came at a few rides with an actual appreciation of the risks. Still, he always made the distinction between real risk and simple fear of the unknown.
poorly maintained carnival rides= real risk.
Broken seat belts = real risk.

Glow-paint puppets = not a risk!

 

[ttintagel]

And screw everybody else who has to listen to your kid shrieking instead of enjoying the ride audio! Because itis all about you and your fun!

 

[maxiesmom]

And screw everybody else who has to listen to your kid shrieking instead of enjoying the ride audio! Because itis all about you and your fun!

You are assuming the child will shriek. Also, I have heard many a shrieking adult on rides, a quiet ride is something you can't guarantee.

 

[tsme]

I don't think any child should be "forced" on a ride. I've seen it done at Disney & not only was the child terrified (screaming, clawing anything to not get one, & crying) & probably scarred for life (I'm assuming), but so were all the people watching. I'll never get that image out of my mind, nor will my DD. It's fine to try & talk a child into it, or coax, but not okay to drag a child on a ride. IMHO.

 

[edk35]

Never......our youngest son now 16 was slowwwwww to tackle the bigger "Disney thrill" rides...but with each trip he added something on. He rode space mountain for the first time in 1st or 2nd grade ONCE (then it took a few years to get back on it) but it took him forever to ride Thunder, Splash, TOT, R&R and Everest but then each trip he would try one I think Everest was the last one. IT was frustrating but we had to just let it go. Of course sometime in late elementary/early middle school he mastered them all. Now he rides the crazy rides at Six Flags.

 

[luvsJack]

I'll also second the idea of giving kids TOOLS to conquer their fears. Most ride effects can be easily reduced simply by covering your ears or closing your eyes, and laughter. Teaching your kids to laugh at the special effects is one of the most powerful tools in the world!

There's a fine line between making allowances and teaching kids to fear/avoid harmless fun. To me, projecting unnecessary fear on children is just as damaging as kids thinking they are immortals. Both extremes are dangerous.

I've LOVED the Haunted Mansion since I was a kid myself.

Now conversely, one of my elders witnessed an actual gruesome accident on a broken amusement ride as a kid! So he came at a few rides with an actual appreciation of the risks. Still, he always made the distinction between real risk and simple fear of the unknown.
poorly maintained carnival rides= real risk.
Broken seat belts = real risk.

Glow-paint puppets = not a risk!

IMHO, you have to make a determination of what the kid is scared of and why. DD was afraid of fire because of her experience of our home burning and nightmares of us actually being in the home at the time it burned. Nothing was projected on her, it was her fear by her own experiences. After a few controlled experiences with fire she was able to work through it but forcing her to experience a theme park attraction with any fire in it wasn't going to help her in the least. When she saw a hint of fire she would get hysterical. There was no covering her eyes, laughing, singing or anything else that was going to change her fear at the moment. She simply wanted OUT of whatever we were in. So we just avoided those things.

Before our next trip we worked through that fear.


If a child is truly afraid of heights, you can force them to ride Expedition Everest but assuming they are suddenly going to get over it is unrealistic. I know because I am like that child. I am afraid of heights. Dh is not and seems to think if I would just "do it" I wouldn't be afraid. Not true at all. Tried it, didn't happen, not trying again unless its something I want to do, not at someone else's suggestion.

Just because you don't fear it doesn't mean the fear is not very real to the child or other person.


If your child is afraid of glow paint puppets then figure out why and work with it, don't subject everyone else to a screaming, fearful child. And don't make your child feel like they are less because they are afraid of something. And if the child doesn't suddenly "love" the attraction as you promised, you may find yourself with a child even more fearful of trying other attractions.

 

[Vemnox]

When I worked at Soarin' we wouldn't even start the ride if there was a kid in absolute hysterics. There were plenty of scared kids but most of them we could just get down on our knee and talk to and they'd concede. Of course, Soarin' is just a big swing in front of a movie screen so we're not talking ToT here...

 

[jacksonsmom]

I seen the CMs tell a father that he had to take his child off of the Rapids in AK. The kids looked to be about 5 yrs old and was just SCREAMING!!! It was horrible and the poor kid was yelling "no, no, no"
I know my family was ready to tell the CMs we wanted off the ride because no way this kid was going to calm down.
A CM came over and to make sure we were all buckled in and when the kid would not calm down, he said they had to leave. He couldn't let them go on the ride with the kid like that.

The father argued a bit, but finally did leave. My family and another father and daughter both told the CM "THANK YOU"

I always had an agreement with my son, He agreed to give all rides a chance and I agreed if he did not like it, he would not have to go on it ever again.
He went on Tower of Terror at 3 yrs old, Space Mountain at 5 yrs old (when he was tall enough)....He went on all the thrill rides when he reached the height requirement. Very excited on the trip when he finally got tall enough to give Rock & Roll a chance.

Needless to say he still loves those rides at 16.

 

[smellyia]

Thankfully, my kids are thrill seekers - DS at 2 was trying to get on Barnstormer last week lol! I wouldn't force them on anything, BUT that being said, we don't miss out as a group because of 1 person's fear or fit. That 1 can sit out and parents can switch. My DD hasn't ever been able to actually "sit out" even if it's for missing a meet for characters she's seen a dozen times. I wouldn't supplement the waiting with something else that's "fun" for the kid who is scared. It's not punishment, but we all need to conquer our fears and be respectful that this is a group trip with multiple goals. Now, if it's a height issue obviously I will beg and bribe to assuage the disappointment of the lack of an inch!

 

[Planogirl]

I never forced DS to ride anything, however I did reason him onto the Haunted Mansion. He was against riding it but I just knew that he would love it and I was right.

Normally I wouldn't force anyone to ride anything though.

 

[HadesTX]

I remember the first time we went to WDW... we had no children & were in line for the Haunted Mansion. A man was holding a little boy about 2 years old & the kid was very nervous & didn't want to go in. As soon as the doors opened he was crying. When we got to the stretching room he was screaming & thrashing around. He was upset the entire ride. I felt horrible for him. DH & I swore to never do that.

Fast forward about 10 years or so... and DH was the one holding DD (about 4 years old?) and she was very nervous. He kept telling her nothing was scary & that it was a funny ride. Cue the wolves (or coyotes?) howling. Crying child.

I took her & left the line. He was so mad (very hot and tired didn't help either). I made him take a walk to simmer down while I sat on a bench & talked to her about what the ride was like & that I would hold her or her hand the whole time if she wanted to try it. She rode it & it's still to this day her favorite ride. But, if DH would have made her ride it while he was acting a fool she would have hated it.

There were other rides she just wouldn't go on & I didn't force it. No big deal.

 

[MakiraMarlena]

My friend's son rode Peter Pan when he was three or four years old. He cried because it was dark inside. He cried and clung to his mother for the whole ride. When he got off the ride he was still crying. Then he asked to go on it again.

I think she knew perfectly well that he was going to do that.

parents, you know your kids. You don't need to force them, but for the most part you know when they are really scared and when they are not.

 

[houstonmama]

Never.... Would you like it if someone forced you to do something you didn't like or want to do? I don't like rollercoasters. I would be extremely upset if someone forced me to get on so why would I force someone else to do something they don't like? Because they are a child? Children have a right to say no, not to something like homework obviously or going to school but if they don't want to get on they shouldn't be forced to.

 

[tlwfun89]

my girls now college age rode all rides from about 7 years old for some reason they trusted us that if we would do it and they were assured we would never place them in unreasonable harms way

 

[tlwfun89]

the rule for us was always that you have to try something at least once before you make any proclamations. nothing at disney is going to hurt you as long as you follow the rules. everyone in our home pretty grounded in reality and reason so fear rarely gets a foothold when it comes to rides. the only thing kiddo didn't like was space mountain but she would still ride it because "it's just a few minutes long. i can do anything for just a few minutes." she still shut her eyes tho. however, forcing a sobbing, hysterical child on a ride isn't going to help. they need REAL help like coping skills or careful desensitization.

I agree with this statement whole heartedly