When to give up your seat on the bus

[PatsMom]

But who cares what others think? I know I waited for another bus for a seat and I'm happy to get one.

Amen to that - I agree 100%. I waited for a seat and I really don't care if others think that I am rude for not giving it up.

 

[Disneyhappy]

This is always a touchy subject and again, there are varying opinions. This thread has been much tamer than ones in the past as people have been quite passionate in their opinions.

To me, it all comes down to personal beliefs and I do not let bus etiquette rule me in aboslutes (i.e. I neve give up our seat or I will always give up my seat.) Whether people agree or not with DH and I in this day and age, we have taught our DH14 to be chivalrous. I personally can not recall the last time my DH or DS sat on a bus that was SRO. They always give up their seat no matter how tired they may be and my husband has a bad knee (5 surgeries). I usually give up my seat as well if I feel there is someone else who could use it more than me. It is an obvious very subjective assessment on my part but it is my conscious I am dealing with and have to reconcile with. There are also times that I am so exhausted once I reach that bus line that I will not give up my seat. My conscious is bothered but the two voices in my head. The voices usually reconcile with each other because of all the other times I have given up seats. Again, this is just how I deal with it. Everyone is different and are dictated by different values. No judgement here - I accept we all have different values/ethics. This is probably why the government steps in. While I do not remember the exact Federal statute, there is a law that requires people on public transportation to give up their seat for the disabled and elderly. I have seen it posted on public trains in my business travels but not on WDW buses. "Elderly" can be subjective also. I doubt someone has ever been cited for violating the statute but I suppose it can empower the bus/train operator to ask someone to give up their seat for someone who fits within the statute.

Robo- Interesting question. In the past, I know that I chose to get onto a packed bus fully expecting to stand, only because it was the lesser evil in my mind than waiting for the next bus because I was very tired. Standing on the bus I could lean on a seat or a pole that I did not have waiting in line. Sometimes, someone was kind enough to offer me their seat. Most times I would decline because it was the choice I made to stand. If I was that exhausted that I needed a seat and I waited for the next bus, I would keep the seat. However, if I ever found myself that exhausted, I think we would pay for a cab. On those times when I do have a seat and I see other people coming on board for SRO, holding kids or just looking totally exhausted I will usually give up my seat. I can relate to that desperation because I have been there and done that - just wanting to get on that bus and back to my bed! I know people will argue to leave the parks before that level of exhaustion hits. For those that can predict the time before exhaustion kicks in, kudos to you. For my family and I, sometimes, we do not realize we have reached that point until we are walking to or waiting at the bus stop and it hits us.

In the end, while there may be a correct legal answer, there is no correct ethical answer. Sometimes I wish I did not have the conscious I did so I could be seflish sometimes without feeling guilty. It is propably a combination of my personality and the way I was raised. However, I do not judge and fully respect people who feel no reason to give up there seat. That is their choice and do not expect them to have to defend their position. And while it may not be consistent with my values, I am in no position to say my values are better than someone elses. In my oinion, that is some Greater Being's decision but then, again, that is a whole other thread!

So in answer to the OP's question, only you can decide what is the right thing to do in the situtation at the time it occurs.

I am now stepping waaaaayyyyy down off my soapbox!

 

[mousebit]

Those same people that CHOSE to stand on the bus are the ones compromising their own safety. Their choice, not mine. We do the smart thing and wait for another bus because we know it isn't safe to stand. Those folks have the same option to do the right thing.

Yes, I agree. BUT sometimes you have to realize that not everybody knows what you know. You can call it an act of ignorance if you want, but the point is should a small child be injured because his/her parents made a foolish mistake while an able-bodied adult sat comfortably nearby and watched? It's such a small gesture...

 

[momtoBrandon&Jacob]

I couldn't believe the amount of healthy, able-bodied men who refused to give up their seat to a woman. My husband would never dream of sitting while a woman is left standing!

We even actually had a bus driver announce, "Ok men. Who is going to be a gentleman on this bus and give up their seat to the ladies?" I almost cheered out loud!

Ok, my husband always gives up his seat, holds the door, etc for whoever looks like they are in need and honestly, it grates on my nerves. He grew up to be very respectful of the opposite sex, elderly, etc. but I think there should be a limit. There is no reason for him to stand and have a female in his age range who is not pregnant or holding a baby to sit. This is the 21st century people!

 

[hello kitty]

This thread truly fascinates me. Like a fly drawn to *you know what* I am.

There are people who will actually ask for your seat? Where does one find the nerve!?!

 

[DaisyD]

Yes, I agree. BUT sometimes you have to realize that not everybody knows what you know. You can call it an act of ignorance if you want, but the point is should a small child be injured because his/her parents made a foolish mistake while an able-bodied adult sat comfortably nearby and watched? It's such a small gesture...

Sorry but when we wait forever for another bus we are not giving up our seats. We cannot stand on a moving vehicle. Not safe for US and we just can't balance. If someone got on the bus and said something I would certainly tell them it isn't safe and that they should wait for another bus like we do.

 

[mousebit]

Sorry but when we wait forever for another bus we are not giving up our seats. We cannot stand on a moving vehicle. Not safe for US and we just can't balance. If someone got on the bus and said something I would certainly tell them it isn't safe and that they should wait for another bus like we do.

Then you shouldn't. If you cannot hold on and balance well you should not get out of your seat - that defeats the purpose by putting you at risk. I don't because I simply can't. BUT, my 210 lb, 6'2" healthy husband is strong and feels comfortable with standing and is more than willing to give up a seat rather than watch a young mom struggle with a child, knowing that they could both be hurt. AND I am more than willing to share a seat with my granddaughter if it comes to that. Doesn't hurt us a bit. Doesn't make us heroes. Just isn't a big deal.

 

[DJT]

We don't want to stand on the busses, so we just wait for another bus.

This happened to us in December. DH and I ended up giving our seats to two mothers holding sleeping babies. We always give our seats to mothers holding babies and to older people. We stood more than we sat on those buses!

 

[pooh2001]

YES - We give up seats to people with a child being held in their arms, pregnant women, older folks, anyone with a disability.
We are a DH, DW and teens all capable of standing and holding on to an upper rail.
My teen DS even loves to stand on the monorail- even if there is a seat.


In Church - if we see an elderly couple, we even have given up our seats.
I can not see 70 year old couples standing for an hour Mass.

Be polite - you never know when you will need the same favor.

 

[taximomfor4]

My DS (12) prefers to stand and looks for any reason to give up his seat. DH usually gives up his seat as well. I will for an elderly person or someone holding a baby.

What bugs me is when you have two parents and 2 toddlers and they take up 4 seats while a bunch of people stand. It really isn't that difficult to hold your kid for 15 minutes, and if you are that concerned about, "safety," rent a car and strap the darlings in car seats.

I personally cannot imagine thinking a child doesn't belong in a seat. Some cities have a rule that small children MUST be in their own seats, not on parents laps, for safety.

And some of us are outnumbered by our small children. To put one on my lap, and have 2 that I cannot support in the event of quick curves/turns, etc cost my dd a good bump on the head on our first trip. We now put the 3 younger kids into 2 or 3 seats, and I sit with them. If the bus turns sharply, I plant my feet hard and throw an arm each direction, in front of all 3 kids. On occasion, we have begun trying to put the 3 younger kids in seats while I stand in front of them. That, we feel less comfortable with because if the bus turns sharply, I may not be able to help block all 3 kids with my knees.

I just don't get the anger over a 3 yr old in a bus seat. I would choose to believe that each parent is doing with their child what they think is the best thing to do. We protect our children, and feel we are making the safest choice to have them in bus seats alongside me. We are very careful to teach our kids courtesy, but this, to me, is a safety issue.

 

[Darcy03231]

As everyone in my family is capable of standing we will always give up our seats to the elderly/disabled/pregnant/very young or parents holding infants/toddlers.

 

[ducklite]

No one should EVER feel obligated to give up their seat, unless they are sitting in one of the seats marked that they are priority for handicapped and elderly passengers.

Otherwise in all honesty, if you've waited for a bus, you have every right to take a seat. Those waiting behind you have the option to wait for teh next bus if they want or need a seat.

And no one should ever judge someone for not giving up a seat, you never know if they ahve an invisible disability. And to tell someone to give up a seat--that's just beyond rude--I wouldn't give up my seat to a 96 year old one legged blind person with triplet 6 month olds hanging from around their neck if they had the gall to demand I do so!

As long as I'm feeling well, I will give up my seat for a woman with an infant (not kids old enough to stand and hold onto mom or dad for support though--and if they are tired, well so am I, mom and dad should get some common sense and leave before the kids are dropping) or an elderly or obviously disabled person. I won't give my seat up to pregnant ladies though--pregnancy is not a disability, and frankly if the woman is high risk she should either plan her day better or probably not be at WDW to begin with. I went through most of my pregnancy riding the city bus back and forth to work, often standing, and never expected anyone to give me a seat. I certainly survived. (And I walked another 3/4 a mile to work after I got off the bus as well!)

The exception to that is if we've already let others pass ahead of us and have waited for the next bus. In that case I will only give the seat to an elderly person or someone with an obvious disability. The parents can wait for the next bus--like I did. And I don't want to hear "but the kids are tired." Parents should have had enough common sense to leave earlier.

Anne

 

[taximomfor4]

Forgot to say: about waiting for the next bus, we have a towel we sit on for parades. Well, at the bus stop, when we choose to wait for the next bus, we sit on the towel right there in line.

 

[dzorn]

If you must STAND and WAIT in the queue for the NEXT bus, why not just STAND and RIDE on the FIRST bus?

Because the queue waiting for the next bus ususally doesn't make sudden stops that can cause you to fall over and lose balance.


We usually wait for the next bus. I will ususally give up my seat if I think it is a safety issue. Children should not be standing and parents should have the sence to know it, but they will crowd them on a bus when they should just wait for the next one.

Denise in MI

 

[hematite153]

I grew up in a big city and rode buses and subways to get to and from school. Thus, I am generally quite comfortable standing on buses. I used to be good enough at balancing that I didn't even feel the need to hang on.

Thus, I am generally happy to give up my seat to someone who looks like they need it more than I do. However, I also think that many people's needs to sit are not obvious. My DW will always wait for the next bus in order to get a seat because, although she looks perfectly healthy, she has a disease that makes standing/walking more difficult. At wdw she uses a w/c so I suspect that most are okay with the fact that she sits on the buses. However, I have fibro and have on occasion reached a point where I also feel unable to stand. I'm sure it looks funny to have me pushing a w/c yet decide to sit (I think it's only happened once on a SRO wdw bus) but with fibro I always feel worn out so I can't really leave before the exhaustion hits.

I choose to assume that people who are sitting instead of offering their seats to others (who obviously need them) have a good reason for doing so. Whether due to safety concerns, illness/surgery, age, or already having waited for a later bus I don't really consider it my business what other people's reasons are.

 

[I'mNoPrince]

Then you shouldn't. If you cannot hold on and balance well you should not get out of your seat - that defeats the purpose by putting you at risk. I don't because I simply can't. BUT, my 210 lb, 6'2" healthy husband is strong and feels comfortable with standing and is more than willing to give up a seat rather than watch a young mom struggle with a child, knowing that they could both be hurt. AND I am more than willing to share a seat with my granddaughter if it comes to that. Doesn't hurt us a bit. Doesn't make us heroes. Just isn't a big deal.

So you think your 210lb Healthy Husband is less dangerous then say a under 100lb kid flying through the bus. Just the nature of holding on to 1 rail or pole whould cause if something happened for him to end up on top of someone spinning into a seat. This is if he holds on to what he was holding.

This is my entire problem is the safety for all those on the bus . They ask you to remain seated on a non-full bus for a reason .Why should they in the next breath tell you it's OK to stand.

I still hold doors open and show other signs for respect others but that has nothing to do with if they are a man ,woman, or child they all get treated equally with respect.

And yes if you put your child in danger by putting them on a SRO bus then your resposible for their safety not me.

 

[NotUrsula]

Originally posted by jensen:
...But, on the occasions where people were forced to stand, I always made my children give up their seats...

Sorry, bad decision. Based on the ages in your sig, your kids are really too young to be standing on a moving bus. Most kids don't have good enough balance to safely ride standing until they are about 8 yrs. old. The rule of thumb that I've heard recommended is that if they are still young enough to use any kind of carseat in a private vehicle, then they are probably too young to be standing on a moving bus.

If someone needs the seats, then fine, give yours up and stand in front of the children, but don't have the children stand -- not at that age. This is also preferable in safety terms to holding a child in your lap, provided that child is older than an infant in arms.

 

[marivaid]

QUESTION:

What if you decide to wait for the NEXT bus so you CAN sit down,
the NEXT bus arrives and your group then boards it and sits down.

Now THIS bus fills up.

Do YOU now need to get up and stand so that others may sit?


(I'll keep asking this until I get some feedback.)

We chose to wait, this is an option that everyone has, if others choose not to take it and choose to go in a bus that is already packed, they should expect to stand. WDW is not going to run out of buses, there is no need for anyone to stand unless they CHOOSE to.

It's common sense really, if you're pregnant or if you're carrying an infant, leave the park half an hour early and the bus will not be anywhere as packed.

Cabs are always available too.

 

[momtoBrandon&Jacob]

Sorry, bad decision. Based on the ages in your sig, your kids are really too young to be standing on a moving bus. Most kids don't have good enough balance to safely ride standing until they are about 8 yrs. old. The rule of thumb that I've heard recommended is that if they are still young enough to use any kind of carseat in a private vehicle, then they are probably too young to be standing on a moving bus.

If someone needs the seats, then fine, give yours up and stand in front of the children, but don't have the children stand -- not at that age. This is also preferable in safety terms to holding a child in your lap, provided that child is older than an infant in arms.

I totally agree. I would never let my kids stand on a moving bus. And to the poster who said to "strap the darlings in a car seat" it appears that you are the one with the problem so maybe you should ride in a car rather than take a bus - that way you will always have a seat.

 

[clkelley]

And THIS is where the problem gets complex.

What if you decided to wait for the next bus so you could sit down,
the next bus arrives and your group then boards it and sits down.

Now THAT bus fills up.

Do YOU now need to get up and stand so that others can sit?

If the line is long, then the folks behind you KNOW that you waited for the next bus because they saw other folks go ahead of you, so it shouldn't be an issue.