When do you decide to send food back?

[Vylette Rose]

Twice this summer, my DH sent back food in restaurants, once at an Outback and then at Yachtsman Steakhouse. Now, I almost NEVER send back food at a restaurant....maybe twice over the course of 50 years of eating out! But my husband is more particular and has over the years send it back several times over the 30 years I've known him. I've always sort of thought he was over-reacting. And it drags out the meal and means he finishes much later than I do.

But both times he told me he was thinking about sending his food back this summer, I asked to taste it, and I actually had to agree. Both times, his meat was really substandard. At Outback, we both had the exact type of steak, but mine was worlds better. His was mealy and course. At Yachtsman, he had a more expensive steak than mine, and it taste like nothing. It was tough and flavorless (not to mention 60 bucks!)

So, what's your barometer on when to send food back? Does the cost matter? (Like for $60, the steak should be really great?)

I'm a chef, and can tell you that quite a bit more goes into a steak than price. How it's cooked, the grade of beef, whether it's properly seasoned, and even different cooks on the same line can affect the steak.
As for when I would send it back- if it is not cooked as ordered (doneness, temp, seasoning etc...), if it doesn't meet my expectation (within reason), and, obviously, foreign substances on the plate.
You should never be afraid to send it back, I would say that if you are, you are probably not at the restaurant you should be.

 

[PoohsHunnyBee]

Average spot or not. Food should be cooked to your specification. Now if you get a deal for a really cheap cut of steak and it's tough or really fatty, well, you get what you pay for. But again, it should be cooked the way you want it.

I agree that it "should" be that way, but unless at a high-end steakhouse (where I would expect steak to be done exactly as ordered), I typically order steak medium because I am generally happy when it is medium rare to medium well. If the steak is outside that range, it's unacceptable regardless of what restaurant it is. But if I wasn't ok with not getting exactly the doneness I ordered, I would have sent back a lot of steaks and burgers and that's not worth my time. Do I just have bad luck? Do some people seriously get the perfect amount of pink/red every time?

 

[Disneylover99]

I agree that it "should" be that way, but unless at a high-end steakhouse (where I would expect steak to be done exactly as ordered), I typically order steak medium because I am generally happy when it is medium rare to medium well. If the steak is outside that range, it's unacceptable regardless of what restaurant it is. But if I wasn't ok with not getting exactly the doneness I ordered, I would have sent back a lot of steaks and burgers and that's not worth my time. Do I just have bad luck? Do some people seriously get the perfect amount of pink/red every time?

For me, it's easy. Since I like it well done, I emphasize that I don't want to see any pink in my steak or burger. That's pretty easy to get right.

I can see how the degree of pink would vary in a medium steak though and I agree it's probably not always going to be cooked to your perfect standard of pink/red.

 

[kathy_876]

If I'm going to send food back. I'm leaving the restaurant with out eating. Once got a cold burger from Ruby Tuesday. Called the manager and said we were leaving. Left money for drinks and out the door we went. Sending food back leaves an opportunity for the food to be messed with. Not taking a chance.

 

[hopeful4fl]

When you go to a restaurant, specially at Disney where their claim is best customer service and their prices reflect that, my expectation is one close to perfection. I LOVE steak, and if it is not rare, which is how I order it, I send it back.
Most of the side dishes I can deal with. Hard to screw up veggies or rice. At least at Disney, I have never had any issues with anything else.
I would also not expect the waiters to screw with your food. Then again, I am an optimist.

 

[ncc1701]

We sent back at Rose and Crown twice. First time DH's Shepherd Pie was cold (not even lukewarm) . The next time we ate dinner there my fish wasn't cooked all the way through . After that a restaurant we used to like is off the dinner list. May go back for lunch someday depending on the menu.I only send back if it is undercooked , cold or not what I ordered. Usually it only happens every couple of years not a regular event.

 

[PoohsHunnyBee]

For me, it's easy. Since I like it well done, I emphasize that I don't want to see any pink in my steak or burger. That's pretty easy to get right.

I can see how the degree of pink would vary in a medium steak though and I agree it's probably not always going to be cooked to your perfect standard of pink/red.

That makes sense to me. No pink is definitely easier to get right and less open to personal interpretation of "some" plus sending a steak back for an extra minute or two on the grill generally eats up less time than the kitchen needing to start from scratch.

 

[Lori74]

most of the time i let the wait staff offer to fix it, when they ask how things are, i tell them i'm not happy, almost always they offer to make it right, if they don't offer, i often just leave it. unless its truly unedible, then i will definitely ask for it fixed or my money back. i'm kinda fussy, so i try to be specific when i order and let them know what i would like. this is a great question! i've been torn about the open face sandwich at bog breakfast, it looks great but if they over toast the bread, i won't eat it and not sure if i should ask for it to be fixed if it is overdone, however, as expensive as it is, i should enjoy it!

 

[robinb]

We would send back food if:

• It wasn't cooked properly (over- or under-done)
• Wasn't hot (obviously doesn't apply to things that aren't supposed to be hot)
• Wasn't what we ordered

We would never send something back if we simply didn't like it. That's not the restaurant's fault.

Just about any restaurant from McDonalds to a top-end steakhouse will occasionally have a mis-step in the kitchen. One time shouldn't be enough to write-off the restaurant. If a restaurant repeatedly fails then its time to move on.

I have sent back food for all of your reasons *plus* I have sent back food because I didn't like it. IMO, it is the restaurant's fault. I am an adventurous eater and I choose a dish based on the description. If it doesn't taste like I expected it to taste and that taste is bad, I will tell the server that "I'm not really digging this.". I am always offered a replacement dish. I'm at the restaurant to eat and if I can't eat the food because it tastes bad I won't hesitate to ask for something else.

 

[PoohsHunnyBee]

I have sent back food for all of your reasons *plus* I have sent back food because I didn't like it. IMO, it is the restaurant's fault. I am an adventurous eater and I choose a dish based on the description. If it doesn't taste like I expected it to taste and that taste is bad, I will tell the server that "I'm not really digging this.". I am always offered a replacement dish. I'm at the restaurant to eat and if I can't eat the food because it tastes bad I won't hesitate to ask for something else.

An item can fit the menu description and still not be what I expected. For example, I like peanut butter and banana, but I know I don't like them combined. If I was unaware of my distaste and ordered an item with that combination, it would taste bad to me. Other people enjoy that combination and would think it tastes good.

I wouldn't have any problem with letting my server know I don't like it or accepting a complimentary substitute if offered, but I wouldn't expect them to offer. That's my ordering mistake, not the kitchen's fault, and I would be willing to eat the cost.

 

[cluvsdisney]

I'll send food back if it's not how I ordered it - steak over or under cooked, a sauce or topping was added that I asked to be excluded, etc. Only once I had to send something back that was cold.

It's so dumb but I used to have the hardest time getting a quarter pounder with no cheese at the McDonald's near my train station. I would order a quarter pound hamburger with no cheese and it was still prepared with cheese. I just don't eat mcdonald's anymore.

 

[xlxo]

Sending food back leaves an opportunity for the food to be messed with. Not taking a chance.

Agreed.... the biggest horror is what extra seasoning they put on.

Medium and Medium rare can vary between restaurants/chefs. I love sushi, but some family members get freaked out when they see blood in beef/pork. If it's undercooked, I will ask it to be packed up and I'll reheat it at home. Won't be returning for a long time.

I order medium well for my sanity.

 

[jodifla]

I didn't think about what they would "do" to the food...seriously? In any kind of decent restaurant?

 

[NoScreenJM2]

As someone who has made their living in Fine Dining restaurants for many years I say.... Always send your food back if it's not prepared correctly. Also feel free to kindly explain that you just aren't enjoying something and would like to order something else. This will almost never be an issue. What you should never do is complain about something after you have consumed it, or at the end of the meal when there is nothing to be done. I tell my guests to always tell me if they are unhappy with something. Yes this means they will have to wait for a new dish, but I'd rather that happen than be stuck with a meal I do not enjoy. Complaining after the fact to me is always read as someone looking to get something for free. Main advice be nice and explain. But as long as you are willing to wait they should happily accommodate your request.

 

[TiffanyA]

Wow, I am probably considered the nightmare customer. I send a LOT back. I live a paleo lifestyle for my health (everyone on my father's side has dropped dead of either a heart attack or some form of heart disease) and this is the only thing I have found that helps control my spiraling high cholesterol.

Now my diet is mostly meat and veggies. I also have food sensitivities, which I never realized until I eliminated so much. I am pretty specific about what I want to see on my plate. I will, of course, choose something close to my diet. It's not like I order a pizza and send it back when it comes out with a crust. Honestly, if it's a piece of bread I can easily put off to the side, fine. But if it's not something I can easily remove, I will send it back.

For steak, I do not enjoy it over medium. I specify medium rare and tell the server I'd rather it be more rare than medium if they want a range. I grew up hating steak because my father will only eat it well-done for fear of food poisoning. My husband, then boyfriend, introduced me to medium rare steak when I was in college and oh my, I was aghast at what I had been missing out on. Any steak I order is likely from an expensive establishment (with steak, I think you get what you pay for), and if I'm paying big bucks for it, I want to get what I asked for.

 

[Jhondy210]

I rarely send food back. In fact, I only remember one time I sent food back and it was a steak.

I sent back the steak because I ordered medium well and it came back rare. The manager promised to get it right and the next steak he sent out for me was also rare. I mean it was bright red! I was mad at that point because we had been at the restaurant for over an hour, the waitress never re-filled our drinks, and then the steak was screwed up twice! So, I asked for the bill for the sodas and appetizers. The restaurant took care of our bill, which was nice of them, but I will never go back to this restaurant again.

 

[TheRustyScupper]

We send back food to the kitchen without hesitation,
. . . if it is not as we ordered it (example: steak not medium-rare, or not rested properly and leaks juices)
. . . if it is not appetitizing in appearance (example: it looks like it was just thrown on the plate)
. . . if it is cold

NOTE:
When we send food back, we "mark it" so to not the same food coming back to us.
Our usual method is to put a slice in the steak or cut the vegetables

 

[elaine amj]

I'm a chef, and can tell you that quite a bit more goes into a steak than price. How it's cooked, the grade of beef, whether it's properly seasoned, and even different cooks on the same line can affect the steak.
As for when I would send it back- if it is not cooked as ordered (doneness, temp, seasoning etc...), if it doesn't meet my expectation (within reason), and, obviously, foreign substances on the plate.
You should never be afraid to send it back, I would say that if you are, you are probably not at the restaurant you should be.

As someone who has made their living in Fine Dining restaurants for many years I say.... Always send your food back if it's not prepared correctly. Also feel free to kindly explain that you just aren't enjoying something and would like to order something else. This will almost never be an issue. What you should never do is complain about something after you have consumed it, or at the end of the meal when there is nothing to be done. I tell my guests to always tell me if they are unhappy with something. Yes this means they will have to wait for a new dish, but I'd rather that happen than be stuck with a meal I do not enjoy. Complaining after the fact to me is always read as someone looking to get something for free. Main advice be nice and explain. But as long as you are willing to wait they should happily accommodate your request.

I agree. That said, I try to be reasonable and I don't send food back often. But if it means enough to negatively impact my dinner, then yes, I will give the restaurant a chance to make things right. And if I do, I send it back early. If I am more than halfway through it, it obviously didn't bother me that much.

Recently, we ate at Emeril's Tchoup Tchop at Universal Studios. I had a reasonably positive experience. We loved some parts of our meal and some parts just didn't work out. That said, the manager went out of his way to try to make up for it - I was impressed that he cared enough. If I hadn't made my dissatisfaction known, I would have left with a negative experience. There were a couple of missteps and I mentioned it in passing but brushed it off. The final straw came when my dessert was nothing like what I expected. This time, I complained - the Waffle Sundae Sandwiched tasted just like frozen Eggo waffles. The manager came by pretty quickly, assuring me they were freshly made on waffle irons. I was even less impressed since their recipe must be rather dreadful then. I told him it was fine as we would just enjoy the ice cream but he insisted I try a different dessert. He brought out an Acai bowl and it was incredible. Emeril's hypes itself as a gourmet place with good chefs. The first dessert was blah. I would have accepted it in a place like Applebees. The second melded flavors together in an delicious way, something I expect from Emeril's branding. (by the way, if you ever eat there, get their celery root puree. Sounded completely gross but was mashed potato on steroids. I was tempted to lick the plate!)

 

[cbg1027]

I've always believed leaving food on the plate sends a bigger message than sending it back.

That doesn't send that message at all. The biggest message food on the plate says is that restaurant portions are absurdly large and the guest only ate what they wanted.

I worked as a server for three years. No one thinks food on the plate means you didn't like or or that something was wrong. Like most people, most servers will assume nothing is wrong with your food if you do not speak up and TELL us that.

 

[Nancyg56]

I send food back if I cannot eat it. If I choose to keep food that is beyond redemption that usually means that I have decided that I am not giving that restaurant another chance, and that is something I have only done twice in my life. I pay for my meal, and I am through.

For the most part, cold food or meat I cannot chew or that is way to over for me goes back. I will say that no one in my family will dine out again with my DS and his DW because she has never met a meal that she will eat the first time around. Every time she sends something back, disrupting everyone else at the table. There has never, not one time, been an instance that we all dine out together and she is happy wth her plate. She has not done that if it is just the two of us, but I think she is afraid of me.
One valentines night Dh and I were dining out in a nice restaurant in town. WE seldom went out during the week, so this really as kind of special. The guy seated next to us was going off of the server, he sent his prime ib back no less than three times, and nothing made him happy. The last time th server brought him a new plate he started berating he again, and my DH just had enough. All of a sudden he looked at the guy and told him to just be quiet and eat! Honestly, my DH is usually that guy who says nothing, but he is pretty intimidating when he does, all 6'6",265 piunds of him. The guy put his nose down, stopped complining and ate!