When do you consider someone an alcoholic?

[bcbmommy]

Sort-of a hard question to answer, I know. But my friend and I were talking about this today. She had about a 2-year struggle with alcohol several years ago. It started with wine, then she had some junk happen in her life, and that made it escalate. At the end of that 2-year stint, she ended up going to rehab for several weeks, and has been sober ever since. She posed the question to me today, because someone else had said to her that she couldn't have been an alcoholic if she only drank for 2 years. I think it has her wondering, and to be honest, I've wondered the same thing at times. I think it was a really, really bad time in her life, and the alcohol made it worse, but she just couldn't get off that hamster wheel on her own. She told the person who asked her, that yes, she probably could just have one drink now and not want another....but why chance it. Honestly, it doesn't usually seem to bother her that she can't drink....but she did say that when she and her dh went to a work-sponsored weekend getaway where the booze was constantly flowing, that she felt like focusing so much on not having a drink was making her want a drink. lol. She put it a little more eloquently than I just did, but you get the idea. Anyway....I'm just wondering what you guys think.

 

[morgan98]

Just for the record, I like a drink as much as the next guy.

I don't think how long you drink is what determines if you are an alcoholic. It is what drinking does to you and the fact that you cannot stop when you want to or should is what makes you an alcoholic.

 

[gemini2727]

I think if I had needed to go to rehab to stop myself from drinking too much before, I probably wouldn't chance it either. And I would probably consider myself a recovering alcoholic at that point.

 

[Mizzoufan]

I think when you have to start hiding how much you are drinking from people.

 

[minnie mum]

The internet is full of definitions of alcoholism Here's how the AMA defines it:

Alcoholism
Definition

Alcoholism or alcohol dependence is defined by the American Medical Association (AMA) as "a primary, chronic disease with genetic, psychosocial, and environmental factors influencing its development and manifestations."
Description

Alcoholism is characterized by:

• a prolonged period of frequent, heavy alcohol use.
  
• the inability to control drinking once it has begun.
  
• physical dependence manifested by withdrawal symptoms when the individual stopsusing alcohol.
  
• tolerance, or the need to use more and more alcohol to achieve the same effects.
  
• a variety of social and/or legal problems arising from alcohol use.

Obviously your friend meets more than one of these criteria. You don't have to have been a falling down drunk for many years to be an alcoholic. Kudos to your friend for being able to maintain her sobriety.

 

[Disneylover99]

At the end of that 2-year stint, she ended up going to rehab for several weeks, and has been sober ever since. She posed the question to me today, because someone else had said to her that she couldn't have been an alcoholic if she only drank for 2 years.

That person would be wrong.

 

[christineann]

I was married to an alcoholic, and he finally agreed to go to AA. He came home from a meeting and said, "I'm not going back, because you're not an alcoholic unless you drink all day long." Yeah, I'm sure they said that (sarcasm).

I left him 21 years ago today. It was the beginning of the journey for my kids and me to living free from emotional abuse and violence. Yay us!

 

[DisReno]

I think definitions of an alcoholic are changing...there are many who think that you can manage problem drinking....much like a diabetic manages their sugar intake. If you plan for it, and are responsible, than you can drink. I don't know...I just know that AA doesn't work for the majority of people and it's a very outdated philosophy.

 

[Disneylover99]

I was married to an alcoholic, and he finally agreed to go to AA. He came home from a meeting and said, "I'm not going back, because you're not an alcoholic unless you drink all day long." Yeah, I'm sure they said that (sarcasm).

I left him 21 years ago today. It was the beginning of the journey for my kids and me to living free from emotional abuse and violence. Yay us!

Good for you!

 

[Buzz-Light-Beer]

I really like drinking an alcoholic beverage every now and then and I have seen friends who have drank way more then me during a period of time not hardly bother with drinking at all. The way I determine if someone close to me is an Alcoholic or not is if the Alcohol they are drinking is affecting there daily lives. Like if they are missing work, hiding alcohol around the home so they can drink all the time, drinking on the job, having to have alcohol in the car on the ride home from work. This sort of activity in a person determines to me if they are an alcoholic because the alcohol has started to run there lives. Someone can drink for many years and never have it control there lives. Others can start drinking and immediately cannot stop and it takes over there entire lives and in most cases ruins them.

 

[christineann]

Good for you!

Thanks

 

[tvguy]

Tough question. I went to college with many people who drank to excess for 4 years in college, then either stopped drinking or fell into the one or two drinks a week cycle. I don't consider them alcoholics.

Maybe the people I have considered alcoholics probably were more correctly "functioning" alcoholics. One guy I worked with had a 32 ounce plastic Slurpee cup filled with straight vodka at his work station every day, 5 days a week. He did his job flawlessly, and drinking attitudes were different in the 1970's. The bosses ALL had mini-bars in their offices. He drank that way for his entire adult life and lived to age 85.

My MIL drank every night until she passed out ....did it for 30 years, got up every morning and went to work like nothing happened. She finally quit drinking when her THIRD husband threatened to divorce her.

 

[ash_xox]

I was married to an alcoholic, and he finally agreed to go to AA. He came home from a meeting and said, "I'm not going back, because you're not an alcoholic unless you drink all day long." Yeah, I'm sure they said that (sarcasm).

I left him 21 years ago today. It was the beginning of the journey for my kids and me to living free from emotional abuse and violence. Yay us!

I recently got out of a relationship with a violent alcoholic. It's something to be commended! Congrats on having the strength to not go back. I wasnt married, there arent kids but I still think about forgiving him every day.

 

[mrs moon]

When it stops becoming a pleasure!

 

[PollyannaMom]

I think it's when the alcohol becomes more important than the people in your life.

 

[Disney Doll]

In general, if you think you have a drinking problem, that generally means you do.

Every alcoholic I have ever known or cared for might SAY they didn't have a problem, might pretend to the works that they didn't have a problem, but deep down they knew they did.

 

[usd2bmd]

I think what makes you an alcoholic is different for each alcoholic. I know some people who are functioning alcoholics but they're still alcoholics. I think reading your post the telling sign was that she was so focused on not drinking that she wanted it that much more. If things have been good for her since rehab, why chance it?

 

[lauradis]

Sort-of a hard question to answer, I know. But my friend and I were talking about this today. She had about a 2-year struggle with alcohol several years ago. It started with wine, then she had some junk happen in her life, and that made it escalate. At the end of that 2-year stint, she ended up going to rehab for several weeks, and has been sober ever since. She posed the question to me today, because someone else had said to her that she couldn't have been an alcoholic if she only drank for 2 years. I think it has her wondering, and to be honest, I've wondered the same thing at times. I think it was a really, really bad time in her life, and the alcohol made it worse, but she just couldn't get off that hamster wheel on her own. She told the person who asked her, that yes, she probably could just have one drink now and not want another....but why chance it. Honestly, it doesn't usually seem to bother her that she can't drink....but she did say that when she and her dh went to a work-sponsored weekend getaway where the booze was constantly flowing, that she felt like focusing so much on not having a drink was making her want a drink. lol. She put it a little more eloquently than I just did, but you get the idea. Anyway....I'm just wondering what you guys think.

Good for your friend. I dont think she was what people think of a full blown fall down cant function alcoholic. But she was using wine/alcoholic to self medicate, which can be a hard cycle to break. No difference if she would have started taking "little mother helper pills" to relax her mental troubles.

I think that being a "functioning alcoholic" is ok as long as that person is ok with it.

We as humans use all kinds of things to self medicate during stressful times in our lives, food, religion, sex, alcohol, pills.

 

[AnAmericanInDisney]

When you are doing something everyday or almost everyday; whether its drinking, smoking pot, or any drug; and you can't remember how to act or feel like yourself without it, you have a problem. I know people who cannot be in a social situation without some chemical, and that's a problem.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

If you get delirium tremens or the DT's when you stop.