What's the wackiest gift you ever got?

[princess pooh]

I guy I went on a blind date with showed up with a travel size bottle of shampoo and conditioner in a gift bag . The shampoo was made for frizzy hair and mine is stick straight.

I admit I gave my own bad gift. When I first got engaged I gave my mom a book...The Idiots Guide to Being the Mother of the Bride. I don't know what the hell I was thinking!

 

[liamsaunt]

I thought of another one.

When I was five, one of my mother's friends gave me a can of coffee for Christmas. Chock Full O Nuts coffee, in fact. When I first opened it, I thought maybe she meant to give it to my Mom or Dad. Nope, it was for me. So then I thought maybe she put a toy inside the coffee can, so I took off the lid. Nope! It really was a can of Chock Full O Nuts coffee! What is a five year old supposed to do with a can of coffee?

She was an odd woman.

 

[Stepharoonie!]

Oh, no. I have every single one of you beat on this subject.

My ex-inlaws were crazy as loons. Sorry, they really were...are...I still deal with them because of my daughter.

Anywho, for Maddy's first Christmas, she received a water cooler bottle (one of those giant ones you would find for an office cooler) that was spray painted a pepto-bismol pink, had her name stuck on it in those gold and black mailbox letters, and a gold ribbon with an elastic from a candy box on the top of it. It had a $1 gold coin in it. Was told this would be a GREAT way to start her savings account...then my ex FIL's dog (yes, DOG!) gave him $400 in gold coins. Ummmm...okay.

She also received a clown mobile (I HATE clowns!!) which was missing two clowns. So, there were three clowns and two dangling strings.

She needed sippy cups the next year, so she received them...along with chew bites on every one of them.

I got slippers, complete with the grungy toe imprints inside. Underwear...not only too big, but VERY used, complete with various stains on the crotch.

Ex husband got a 24 piece tool set, missing all but 5 tools.

He also got a giant oversized Japanese dragon parka, which had a chewed up ball point pen in one pocket, and a used snot rag in the other.

That same year, he got a wallet from them that was SO OLD that when he closed it, the plastic snapped down the middle. I also got an old Eckerd's photo album, complete with coupons for $1.00 off my next picture developing service...too bad they expired in 1982.

Oh, how could I forget about my dreamcatcher? It had obviously been hanging up somewhere where someone smoked 24 packs a day, as it was sticky with tar and stunk to high heaven. I made a comment that the only thing it would catch and bring me would be bad dreams.

Oh, there's lots more...but my absolute favorite would be my ex FIL standing in front of me, telling me he was going to go to Victoria's Secret to get me some bras, but "I don't know how big your hoogies are, so just run over to my house and pick out whatever you want from my bottom drawer." EEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!

 

[MELSMICE]

Oh, no. I have every single one of you beat on this subject.

My ex-inlaws were crazy as loons. Sorry, they really were...are...I still deal with them because of my daughter.

Anywho, for Maddy's first Christmas, she received a water cooler bottle (one of those giant ones you would find for an office cooler) that was spray painted a pepto-bismol pink, had her name stuck on it in those gold and black mailbox letters, and a gold ribbon with an elastic from a candy box on the top of it. It had a $1 gold coin in it. Was told this would be a GREAT way to start her savings account...then my ex FIL's dog (yes, DOG!) gave him $400 in gold coins. Ummmm...okay.

She also received a clown mobile (I HATE clowns!!) which was missing two clowns. So, there were three clowns and two dangling strings.

She needed sippy cups the next year, so she received them...along with chew bites on every one of them.

I got slippers, complete with the grungy toe imprints inside. Underwear...not only too big, but VERY used, complete with various stains on the crotch.

Ex husband got a 24 piece tool set, missing all but 5 tools.

He also got a giant oversized Japanese dragon parka, which had a chewed up ball point pen in one pocket, and a used snot rag in the other.

That same year, he got a wallet from them that was SO OLD that when he closed it, the plastic snapped down the middle. I also got an old Eckerd's photo album, complete with coupons for $1.00 off my next picture developing service...too bad they expired in 1982.

Oh, how could I forget about my dreamcatcher? It had obviously been hanging up somewhere where someone smoked 24 packs a day, as it was sticky with tar and stunk to high heaven. I made a comment that the only thing it would catch and bring me would be bad dreams.

Oh, there's lots more...but my absolute favorite would be my ex FIL standing in front of me, telling me he was going to go to Victoria's Secret to get me some bras, but "I don't know how big your hoogies are, so just run over to my house and pick out whatever you want from my bottom drawer." EEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!

Whoa, Steph!!! I think we have a winner!

 

[Stepharoonie!]

Oh, believe me...there was so much more that I got from them, and NO ONE ever believed my stories until I'd trot out the goods to show them...

 

[Stepharoonie!]

My MIL usually gives me an assortment of small gifts, all wrapped in one box. One year the treasure included window valances with matching napkins. The valances didn't fit my window, nor match my decor.

My niece, who is a teacher, told me a funny story recently. One of her teacher friends, received as a Christmas gift from a 3rd grader, a sandwich bag full of weed. The child had no idea what it was, but just said that Daddy was giving it to all his friends, and she thought teacher would like some too. (Another child brought her parents' personal vibrator to school to play with. She thought it was amusing to watch it bouncing on the floor).

A girl that still works for my husband's comic store is hit on by a lot of men there...last Valentine's Day, a customer gave her a very pretty red bag with massage oil, batteries, and a realistic looking vibrator. She's not the quiet type, so she read him the riot act