Quinn: OK, fine! You figured me out. Allow me to give you a random, out of character, backstory of my life that nobody knows about. Yes, my real name is Zoomba. I was born within an African tribe where I was heir to the throne, but that wasn't the life for me, so I fled when I was 12 to Germany. It was there I went deep sea diving with scientists from Guam to find the rare polka dotted and striped fish. We never did. By the time I was 14 I had successfully mated a lamb, a zebra, and a duck. I called it a Lebruck. I was on my way to making millions when suddenly my experiment died... because I forgot to give it water. I was humiliated. I couldn't show my face to my peers, so I moved here to Lima to start anew as Quinn Fabray. So there. I saved you time of going through my records. I told you everything.
Lauren: Actually, none of that was in your records.
Quinn: It's not?
Lauren: No. I was just going to make fun of the fact that it's impossible for you to be a brunette when both of your parents are blonde.
Quinn: What?!?
Lauren: What what you just said works too.
Quinn: *Leaves room crying*