What do you do when stressed?

[jalapeno_pretzel]

I'm not talking about the traffic is so bad stress, or work is extra busy stress. Like overwhelming stress over potentially life changing situation?

I know some that are still able to eat. For me, my appetite completely shuts down and I really almost can't eat.

What do you do to stay sane when all you can do is wait for answers?

 

[LuvOrlando]

Generally I shut down like that too, sorry this is happening right now.
For food I have a microwaved potato or a scrambled egg, to prevent stomach damage there have been times that is all I have had 3 times a day. It is soft and bland and enough to prevent the serious pain that comes from not eating, force yourself because the pain makes it so much worse.

I go to Mass every day, support meetings work too, maybe there is some kind of support for the stressor?

I listen to Harry Potter audio books over and over in my car, audible has them and the story soothes me.
I watch these guys

or

For TV I aim at the most pointless nonsense I can find

 

[jalapeno_pretzel]

Thanks for that, my mind gets out of control and stuck on worst-case sometimes.

 

[ruadisneyfan2]

Thanks for that, my mind gets out of control and stuck on worst-case sometimes.

My mind does that too. It'll go from 0 to 100 in 2 seconds. Dh will say, "Stop it. You already have yourself dead and buried." but it's hard to stay level headed.

I wish I could not eat when stressed. I tend to overeat. Mindlessly.

I hope your answers are all happy news.

 

[Dan Murphy]

What do you do when stressed?

​

 

[princesscinderella]

I'm not talking about the traffic is so bad stress, or work is extra busy stress. Like overwhelming stress over potentially life changing situation?

I know some that are still able to eat. For me, my appetite completely shuts down and I really almost can't eat.

What do you do to stay sane when all you can do is wait for answers?

I try to stay busy, so it makes it hard to focus on the stressor. Start a project you have been putting off, clean a closet, do a puzzle, go for a walk, chat on the DIS.

When my mom passed unexpectedly we had a cruise planned that was leaving in 10’days and I’m so glad we didn’t cancel it as it really was the distraction I needed. If you have the ability to change your scenery for a few days even if it’s a a nearby staycation it could help.

 

[SpaceMan5]

Thanks for that, my mind gets out of control and stuck on worst-case sometimes.

I hear ya and it's not fun at all. My suggestion is to find something that will give your mind a chance to break that negative cycle. Focusing on a game on your phone, Focus on doing one of your hobbies. Redirecting your focus away from the negative thoughts

 

[ronandannette]

I'm a stress-napper. I know some people toss-and-turn but the more upset I am, the harder time I have staying awake. It can render me practically useless in a crisis.

 

[BrianL]

I am prety high-strung and live in a constant state of stress. I know it's bad fo rme, and a lot of it is nothing, but when it is significant it can be really hard. I tend to take very hot showers wher eI fill up the tub and just let it rain on me, preferably in total darkness. It's somewhere I can just be, and I don't have to deal with anything for a brief respite.

My other general stress killer, for when I get so would tight I'd snap a pencil in half by looking at it, is to get a little Vitamin D - D for Disney!

 

[jdb in AZ]

Hand over the chocolate and nobody gets hurt!

 

[LuvOrlando]

Thanks for that, my mind gets out of control and stuck on worst-case sometimes.

Keep reminding yourself worst case scenarios are nothing more than negative imagination, thoughts are not truth, feelings are not truth - they are all just imagination.

The thought that usually jolts me out of those imaginary spirals is the cold hard truth that if I actually had any ability AT ALL to know the unknowable, well, the awful thing in front of me never would have happened because I would have predicted it and prevented it. It is a cold splash of water. Don't get me wrong, sad terrible things still happen but getting caught up in the imaginary responsibility of could have/ would have/ should have is off the mark. Conserve your energy for coexisting with what is in front of you, what is in your control and what you can actually manage. Do not manipulate or try to control anything other than yourself. Just focus on moving through whatever it is and focus on coexisting with the new truths in front of you. Not easy but what is it Churchill used to say, "If you are going through hell, keep going," smart man.

 

[Simba's Mom]

No suggestions because I also have a very hard time. Just following for suggestions.

 

[Jillpie]

Last Winter, a year ago, my husband of 40 years, who is also my very best friend had to have open heart surgery. Leading up to it, was the worst 3 months of my entire life. I just couldn't imagine possibly facing life without him in it. It gutted me, with every waking minute of the day. So I did what I have done my whole life since childhood. I prayed. And prayed and prayed some more. It was actually a lonely time, because even though I had support in my life and was grateful for that, really nobody could truly understand what I was going through. I can now say, that if anyone ever faces this kind of stress, I get it. Having said that, I couldn't have gotten thru it without the daily support that I got. He came through it like a champ and celebrating his one year anniversary next month, thank God.

 

[Disneefun]

Oof. I feel you. The last two years for me were a pressure cooker of caregiving for dying parents, and a whole host of smaller problems. I can't say I'll win any awards for how I coped, but here's my list.

- For the nighttime rumination and freak outs, I got a sleep headset and either listened to sleep stories on the Calm app, or episodes of old sitcoms. When I'd wake up and start freaking, it was helpful to have something to focus on so I could co back to sleep. Helpful tip that learned from a counselor: Set the volume just low enough so you can barely hear it. If your brain has to work to hear the story, it tires itself out quicker and you'll fall asleep. I was dubious, but it worked.

- Exercise. I'm not talking gym rat levels of pumping iron, but making sure that at a minimum each day I went for a walk, or did a small yoga routine, or a video. Just something to move and burn off some of the anxiety.

- Lego. It ain't cheap, but it's soothing.

- Coloring. Yes, I'm an adult, but you can pry my markers and colored pencils from my cold dead hands.

- Focus on what I can control. I tuned out the news, social media, and all the other garbage going on in the world. When your personal world is falling apart, you don't need all the other negativity honing in. There's nothing I could do about any of it, so I turned inward and focused on what I had to do each day.

- Other hobbies. I took up crochet as something to do in waiting rooms, etc. I suck at it, but it gave me something to do besides worry.

- As for food I just dealt with it. Some days I was hungry, some days not. I just gave myself permission to eat when and (pretty much) what I wanted. I tried to stay healthy but some days if all I wanted was McDonalds, then that's what I had and no judgment.

- I wasn't able to have much of a work life or social life. I had to give up my job and most of my friends moved on or away while I was caregiving. But I kept my ear to the ground for opportunities that I could do when it was "over." Now that it is over, I've joined a local book club I heard about, and taken a part time job writing for a website that a friend mentioned a while back. I've got my eye on a couple of other things, too, but I'm sort of reintroducing myself to the world slowly. It helped to remind me that I would have a life again and I needed to look to the future, as well as dealing with what was going on in the present.

- Scream and cry when you need to, and no embarrassment about it. I broke down in public more times than I can count and when people just looked at me, I just blew them off or said, "Sorry, I'm going through a lot."

- Related to that, don't be afraid to talk about it. When people asked, "How's it going?" I was honest that I was struggling. I shared my experience with people (my parents' neighbors, doctors, people from church, etc.) and every time I did, I got support. It was surprising how many people could relate, or just wanted to offer support or share a resource. I don't think I burdened anyone with my problems, and many stepped up to help. You don't have to suffer in silence.

I wish you well.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Usually distraction tends to work for me.

Putting on a comfort show or movie where you can predict because you've seen it before (normally quite a lot of times) the plot points as that can help your nervous system not have to do as much work and you're not having to intake new information.

Listening to music which is often paired with busy work like deciding now is the time to organize X or I've got a decent amount of shredding to do now is the time

If possible go out in nature even for a short time

As for food so long as you're not actively starving yourself I wouldn't put nearly as much pressure on that, it's possible the more that you focus on "I need to eat" the less you actually want to eat. In the worst of the worst stresses I've had forcing food can initiate nausea which just makes it worse so if I need something then something small like saltines or ritz crackers something easy on the stomach and can be eaten in a small quantity to bridge the gap, not a long term thing to do but something to ease the roiling of the stomach that can happen under such stress.