What do you call your MIL/FIL???

[Sleeping~Beauty]

I call my MIL mom. I never got to meet my FIL, he passed away when my husband was in college. My husband calls my parents Mom and Dad also. It was important for us to be equal in our treatment of our parents.

I'm so surprised to see so much in-law animosity. Is it because the spouse has issues with his/her own parents?

I believe that both of our parents are integral parts of our lives, and try to balance it as such.

 

[PaulaSue]

Pat and Paul

 

[SamRoc]

I call my mother in law Marie (her real name) and she is EXACTLY like Ray Romanos mother Marie in "Everybody loves raymond" my dh and I watch that show and I just roll my eyes, because that character was made after my mother in law!

 

[poohbear1029]

First names for FIL and SMIL, we actually dont currently have a relationship with MIL.

I have noticed recently that DH started calling my mother Mom...which I think really means a ton to her! I think it just shoes what a great relationship they have with eachother.

 

[Stitchfans]

I don't.

Seriously, when I have to talk to them (which isn't often, thankfully), I try to avoid using any name at all. It's worked great for over 15 years, so I figure it's working for me!

Same here. I was wondering how to word it. My MIL is a very cold, uncaring person. My FIL (God rest his soul) I did call dad, he was very loving, kind, and thoughtful man.

 

[lisajl]

I don't.

Seriously, when I have to talk to them (which isn't often, thankfully), I try to avoid using any name at all. It's worked great for over 15 years, so I figure it's working for me!

I'm with you on this one! I've been married for 21 years and don't call them Mom and Dad or by their first names. When they call my FIL will say, "This is Dad, who is this?" I say, "It's Lisa, how are you?"

They are not my mom and dad, thank goodness. Plus, I just feel weird calling them anything.

 

[bigbabyblues]

I call them by their first names.....

 

[djcruz4fun]

Nana and Pap Jim

 

[shamrock30]

I feel better after reading this thread! We've been married for 20 years, but I still try not to call them anything. I definitely can't call them mom and dad. Even if I was close to them, which I'm not, I'd still reserve those titles for my own parents. I feel most comfortable calling them Mr. and Mrs., but I know they don't like that so I call them by their first names if I absolutely have to. DH has always felt very comfortable calling my mother and my late father "mom and dad", but they made him feel very welcome in our family.

 

[Kahana-ri]

I call them by their first names. Every now and then we throw in a 'honey'.

 

[disykat]

I don't think not calling inlaws mom and dad implies any kind of bad relationship.

I really don't like giving family titles - like mom, dad, aunt, grandma - to people that are not those things. It's something we don't do in my family and to me it would feel sort of disrespectful to the real thing to do so. My inlaws are not my mom and dad, they are my mother in law and father in law. I'm certainly not going to call them that.

I think the worst is the poor people that are expected to call them mom and dad even though they don't feel comfortable with it. It's kind of like getting a new step mom who immediately expects you to call her mom.

 

[Disney Doll]

Marge & Bob.

 

[diznygirl]

I feel it's their responsibility to say, "welcome to the family, please call me mom" or whatever. And since my MIL never did that to me, I chose to call her by her first name. My parents - although they are separated - both took it uppon themselves to ask DH to call them mom and dad. It really is about acceptance into the family in my eyes.

 

[Marseeya]

I'm so surprised to see so much in-law animosity. Is it because the spouse has issues with his/her own parents?

That's what it is for me. My MIL is a very sweet woman on the outside, but she's downright clueless as to how badly she's hurt my DH over the years. Some of the things she has done and has allowed to be done to him was just vile. I'm civil to her, but I have absolutely no respect for her.

 

[Chris2597]

My inlaws expected me to call them mom and dad, but I just could not get it to come out of my mouth....I like my inlaws and it isnt that I am trying to diss them but M and D are reserved only for my parents....It really was a bone of contention....and I felt like it was pushed on me, maybe I would have felt differently if I didnt feel that it was pushed on me....and if I was allowed to either call them by their names or in time find a comfortable name for them..I called them Grandma and Granpap for years after the kids were born....but decided one day to make a stand and start calling them their names....It went over like a ton of bricks, but I held my ground and now many years later they have accepted it...My oldest dd is now having the same issue with her IL....They expected to be called M and D....she hates it....now that they have children she has resorted to Grandma and Grandpa. My Son in law calls me mom, grandma and by my name....I have left it up to him what he calls me...

 

[Brianne]

It really boils down to a lack of respect on the part of my in-laws. They weren't happy that DH was getting married, although I don't think it would've really mattered who he was marrying. He was the first of his siblings to be married, so because I was "stealing their son away", that was that. We heard the "we'll be divorced within 6 months" comments among other things, and it never got better after we had the kids. It was all very irritating, but I was nothing but respectful to them---after all, it's his family. It's a shame they couldn't be respectful of the choice he made for his life. It doesn't bother either one of us now---we can usually find the humor in the situation. In the end, we're happy still, so we've won.

My DH calls his in-laws "Mom & Dad" btw---some days I think they love him more than me.

 

[palmtreegirl]

I call my MIL/FIL by their first names, DH calls my parents Mom & Dad.

 

[DisneyJen0504]

I call them by their first names. Dh is super close with my parents so he calls them mom and dad.

 

[momof3disneyholics]

I call mine by their first names.

 

[Laugh O. Grams]

I call mine by their first names.

Me too.