Well that sucked!

[Bebella]

This. DH and I have been together for almost 10 years. We don't exchange gifts. Not for anniversaries. Not for birthdays. Not for Christmas. The result is bliss. No worry. No anxiety. No disappointment.

Exactly this. My husband and I have been together for 15 years, married for 4 (we're 31) ...and we only exchange birthday gifts. He usually gets me the same thing every year (a gift card to the spa I like) and that's perfect with me. He was never very comfortable with buying gifts, and I'm a procrastinator so I was always scrambling last minute, so we just decided not to do gifts anyway....It's now a little more complicated with our kids, trying to come up with a gift to give each other from them since they're still so little, but I always go by the saying "If you don't have any expectations, you won't be disappointed."

I agree with another poster too...sounds like it's time that you two stop exchanging gifts. If he can't recipricate in the manner that you want, then you need to stop exchanging so it's not a disappointment.

 

[livie1205]

I lucked out , DH is pretty great at gifts .I think he knows me better then I do lol I have been working out a lot so he got me some compression capris and shirt but he got size small, I said " I don't know if I have got this far yet " and laughed , tried them on and they fit perfect !

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I agree with another poster too...sounds like it's time that you two stop exchanging gifts. If he can't recipricate in the manner that you want, then you need to stop exchanging so it's not a disappointment.

Yes that is always an option too.

 

[sunshinehighway]

I agree with everyone else who says you need to talk to him about it. Its one thing to buy bad gifts but it seems like there's more to it than that. If he had issues with Christmas and gift from childhood and wants you to make an effort to make Christmas special for him them there's absolutely no reason he should be so clueless about giftgi ing that he buys you something he knows won't fit.
Nobody's even mentioned the drone yet. He took a gift for his child and acted carelessly with it and lost it. That's really irresponisble and dad for the kid. It sounds like sad cares most about having his own special Christmas. Maybe you should have a talk with him about growing up and getting over his childhood issues.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I agree with everyone else who says you need to talk to him about it. Its one thing to buy bad gifts but it seems like there's more to it than that. If he had issues with Christmas and gift from childhood and wants you to make an effort to make Christmas special for him them there's absolutely no reason he should be so clueless about giftgi ing that he buys you b something he knows won't fit.
Nobody's even mentioned the drone yet. He took a gift for his child and acted carelessly with it and lost it. That's really irresponisble and dad for the kid. It sounds like dad cares most about having his own special Christmas. Maybe you should have a talk with him about growing up and getting over his childhood issues.

Or you can shock him into reality and get him ill fitting clothes, crap for Christmas and/or nothing.

Sometimes you have to dish out what you have been given to get a point across to some people. Provided you have tried speaking first about it.

 

[sunshinehighway]

Or you can shock him into reality and get him ill fitting clothes, crap for Christmas and/or nothing.

Sometimes you have to dish out what you have been given to get a point across to some people.

Maybe. He sounds really selfish though so I doubt he'd get the point,

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Maybe. He sounds really selfish though so I doubt he'd get the point,

Well there is always my way.

Buy what you want for Christmas, wrap, put under tree and do not tell DH what it is.

 

[sunshinehighway]

You got me there.
Unless he gets all mad that she bought herself better gifts.
Honestly i can't even imagine an adult ( and a father at that) having to have Christmas made special for him because he can't get over childhood issues.
How much of a jerk do you have to be to buy your wife two crappy presents and then lose your sons toy when playing with it. He sounds like a brat.

 

[awalker1015]

I'm a pediatric oncology nurse, I get it! But, really, who else can I say this too? I certainly don't want to burden my family and friends.

And you don't need to apologze or explain yourself for posting a harmless vent on a Disney board. Fellow nurse here. I work with end stage renal patients every day and I know how fragile life is and how grateful I am for my blessings. But I'm still entitled to vent as are you and don't let anyone else try to shame you into feeling otherwise. Neither of us need schooling in compassion.

 

[Planogirl]

Besides how does anyone know whether the OP has bigger issues in her life that she doesn't want to share here? Does everyone here never vent?

I'll vent. The posts chastising the OP get on my nerves. Now I feel better.

 

[AnnaFloridaLover]

88

Going crazy, over all the safe zones in college.

It's actually an expression in our household. It means that we have too much stuff to do and not enough time.

You are lucky you are in good enough health to do the things you do. There are people who are incapacitated and can't move. Quit whining.

 

[gottaluvPluto]

88


You are lucky you are in good enough health to do the things you do. There are people who are incapacitated and can't move. Quit whining.

I wasn't whining. I am expressing my enjoyment. I love having my kids and foster kids. It is a lot of work, but very rewarding. And yes, I know how lucky I am that I can walk and I'm very healthy. I have cousin in her 20s that lives in a nursing home with MS. I have friends that lost limbs to fight for our freedom. So no whining here.

 

[pat fan]

I wasn't whining. I am expressing my enjoyment. I love having my kids and foster kids. It is a lot of work, but very rewarding. And yes, I know how lucky I am that I can walk and I'm very healthy. I have cousin in her 20s that lives in a nursing home with MS. I have friends that lost limbs to fight for our freedom. So no whining here.

Pretty sure she was being sarcastic/funny (hence that funny smiley) but I could be wrong.

 

[gottaluvPluto]

Pretty sure she was being sarcastic/funny (hence that funny smiley) but I could be wrong.

Yeah, I figured she was trying to be funny. Although, you never know. Always best to explain.

 

[TLSnell1981]

There have been quite a few occasions, that DH has given me something in the wrong size. I can forgive him, as long as, it's smaller....not larger.

 

[hereyago]

Has drone displacer always have this problem?
If so, has it been discussed ?

Also, ok his issues from childhood arent an excuse for him now. He is an "adult".

His happy butt needs to go get your son another drone and not
touch it.

 

[gottaluvPluto]

Has drone displacer always have this problem?
If so, has it been discussed ?

Also, ok his issues from childhood arent an excuse for him now. He is an "adult".

His happy butt needs to go get your son another drone and not
touch it.

Was the son not with him when the drone was flown? Maybe they both lost it.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

Was the son not with him when the drone was flown? Maybe they both lost it.

In the OP, she says she bought DH a drone, then she goes on to say DH lost the son's drone.

Were there two drones?

 

[TLSnell1981]

What's the point in that though? Isn't the thought behind the gift the real point not getting stuff?

This is how I feel. It's the thought that counts.

 

[usd2bmd]

DH bought me a sweater that he knew wouldn't fit (bought a petite on purpose, told me I could exchange it) and a piece of costume jewelry. I told him, buy something pretty at X store in a Medium. A nicer ladies clothing store with plenty of pretty items in a medium. I'm not petite, I'm 5'6" tall and a solid size 12.

I'm pretty simple when it comes to jewelry, have 2 rings that I wear every day, wear earrings once a year. There is a jewelry line that I do like that is not costume but is not expensive. The catalog comes to our house regularly. I have never bought a piece of costume jewelry in my life. It looks like plastic.

I was devastated on Christmas morning, as he continued to open present after present.

I spent $400+ on him, including the Star Wars BB-8 droid that I knew he would love. Packages regularly arrived from amazon and he knew they were for him as they were bought on my amazon account, not our joint account. I wanted to surprise him and I also didn't want to be on our joint account to accidentally see what he was getting me. That laugh is on me.

He has issues from childhood surrounding Christmas and I gave him $400 from my personal fun money account to go and buy things for our 2 kids, this was after all of the Santa list items were purchased. It's important for him that the kids have lots of gifts to open. Remember, he bought me 2 gifts, one of which he knew wouldn't fit.

And then he managed to lose our 12 year old son's drone within the first hour of playing with it. It's gone for good.

We've been married for 18 years. Thanks for listening.

I'm sorry. I can relate. My husband grew up one of two children and I grew up one of six, so our views of Christmas were somewhat different. He has gotten very good at shopping for me and listening when i point out things I like. My bad gifts are always from my mother in law. She always asks what I want and I always tell her either gift cards or cash. I do this because she and I have completely opposite taste in clothes and jewelry and this saves me from having to ask for the receipt to exchange it (which she never has).
This year my gifts from her were two scarves, one with butterflies on it that is just not my taste and a pink one with Tinkerbell on it. Now I love Disney but the scarf (IMO) is appropriate for a 7 year old. I also got a bathrobe...The bathrobe was a free gift with fragrance purchase at Ulta before Christmas. I didn't get the fragrance, just the bathrobe. I have a feeling that all of my gifts were free gifts for her. A few weeks before Christmas she asked my husband what I wanted, then called a couple hours later and asked me.,we both told her the same thing.
I wish your Day had gone better. I believe that everyone deserves to get something that will surprise them and make them know they are loved and thought about.