Especially for Kim...but for all to enjoy...some "Zing" and some giggles!!! (and this blows the heck out of my last 2 short posts!)
1. Two vultures board an airplane, each carrying two
> dead raccoons. The
> stewardess looks at them and says, "I'm sorry,
> gentlemen, new rules are:
> only one carrion allowed per passenger."
>
> 2. Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One
> went to Hollywood and
> became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in
> the cotton fields and
> never amounted to much. The second one, naturally,
> became known as the
> lesser of two weevils.
>
> 3. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, but
> when they lit a fire in
> the craft, it sank, proving once again that you
> can't have your kayak and
> heat it, too.
>
> 4. A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old
> West. He slides up to
> the bar and announces: "I'm looking for the man who
> shot my paw."
>
> 5. Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused
> Novocain during a root canal?
> He wanted to transcend dental medication.
>
> 6. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel
> and were standing in
> the lobby discussing their recent tournament
> victories. After about an hour,
> the manager came out of the office and asked them to
> disperse. "But why?"
> they asked, as they moved off. "Because," he said,
> "I can't stand chess
> nuts boasting in an open foyer."
>
> 7. A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption.
> One of them goes to a
> family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes
> to a family in Spain;
> they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a
> picture of himself to his
> birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells
> her husband that she
> wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband
> responds, "They're twins
> ! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."
>
> 8. These friars were behind on their belfry
> payments, so they opened up a
> small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone
> liked to buy flowers from
> the men of God, a rival florist across town thought
> the competition was
> unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but
> they would not. He went
> back and begged the friars to close. They ignored
> him. So, the rival florist
> hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious
> thug in town to
> "persuade" them to close. Hugh beat up the friars
> and trashed their store,
> saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop.
> Terrified, they did so,
> thereby proving that Hugh, and only Hugh, can
> prevent florist friars.
>
> 9. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most
> of the time, which
> produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet.
> He also ate very little,
> which made him rather frail and with his odd diet,
> he suffered from bad
> breath. This made him ....what? (Oh, man, this is so
> bad, it's good) "A
> super callused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis."
>
> 10. And finally, there was the person who sent ten
> different puns to
> friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns
> would make them laugh.
> Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
>
>
>
NO sweatshirt for Karen either 
Is it obvious? 
