Weird experience at the mall

[married2mm]

when we were at the mall-last minute shopping before coming back home


A random guy followed us ( I saw him out the corner of my eye) he then sped up, stood in front of me and asked why I used a cane?!

I've never experienced a total stranger querying my medical conditions before - in my head there were many expletives


Has anyone else ever been in such a situation?

 

[gap2368]

wow creepy for sure,

 

[CookieandOatmeal]

That is just plain rude! Hope he didn't ruin your day.

 

[ammag]

What did you say?

 

[Minniesgal]

Could he have been a salesperson about to pitch you something?

 

[minnie mum]

I've had a couple of occasions where total strangers have asked me why I was using a cane, or was wearing a brace on my leg. Totally rude, IMO. Rather than telling them that it was none of their business, I just turned the tables and asked them why they wanted to know such a personal thing about someone they didn't know.

 

[nikkislaght]

Never had anyone question me using a cane.. but had a friend. tell me in a very aggressive and negative tone.. that I was TOO YOUNG to be using a walker, and why not just rent a scooter... all the while sneering at me...
yeah I don't see that ' friend" any more..

 

[BigAlsGal]

I would probably assume he has a problem with impulse control and just answer his question. He might be on the spectrum. Who knows.

 

[BillSears]

I've had strangers come up and ask about my disability. They often then ask if they can pray for me. I'm not a religious type of guy but I thank then and let them pray as long as I don't have to be involved.

 

[redberyl]

People ask all the time why my daughter has a trach, one mother asked me then turned to her daughter and said " see honey if youre curious you just have to ask." I just say "she has sick lungs" and leave it at that. My tone usually discourages further questions. My daughter hates when they ask. Some people honestly dont get how rude they are being. The intensity you described is unusual ; I would agree with the person who suggested perhaps the man is on the autism spectrum

 

[Toffeewoffy]

Years ago I was at the check out at my local store and the man in front of me had only one arm. He was chatting to the girl on the till; they were talking about the awkward questions that young childen ask. He said that he was being stared at quite hard by one child one day and then the little mouth opened ... "Mummy, that man's ..." He girded his loins thinking, 'here it comes'. But instead of '..only got one arm', the child said, "... got a pony tail."

My SiL's got MS, and the number of people she claims practically spit on her telling her she's drunk and/or doesn't need a stick and/or her scooter! I can't believe that people would be that rude: she is a bit of an attention seeker after all (in that she'll claims things that never happened in relation to all sorts of things).

I walk with a stick most places (except at home and round the office at work), but no-one's ever asked me that question. I do walk with a bit of a waddle though, so perhaps they don't feel they need to. If any sort of justification comes up as to whether I'm asking for a seat on public transport, though, I will always volunteer that it's because I've got arthritis in my knees (so I can stand up as long as I'm not on a moving object, but can't stand up on a moving bus/train etc as my knees have no integrity).

The question the OP got - and the way it was apparently asked - does suggest to me that the man was on the spectrum, as they're often blunt to the point of rudeness as they don't have the empathy that 'normal' people have.

 

[mom2AidanAndEli]

I would probably assume he has a problem with impulse control and just answer his question. He might be on the spectrum. Who knows.

This was my thought exactly! I have a brother with autism and I can totally see him asking a stranger why they have a cane. Not trying to be rude or aggressive or anything else--just genuinely curious about such things! And just a simple, "Because I might fall without it" or something similar would send him on his way!

 

[happymommy]

Not quite the same, but my DD used a wheelchair at Disney this past trip (when she was younger, she was in a stroller much older than most kids). She was just (FINALLY) diagnosed with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (after tests after tests, and missing so much school, and finally being homeschooled for the last quarter of this past year). Her joints were hurting, and she had partially dislocated her shoulder, so couldn't handle walking far.

I had posted photos on Facebook of the kids (we were with friends), and my own sister made the comment on one photo, "What's with the wheelchair?". So rude. I couldn't believe she'd comment that!

I saw lots of folks who seemed healthy in rented wheelchairs that trip (never noticed them before - I guess you don't until you're using one!). It was in the 90's every day, so you know some folks can't walk far, especially in the heat.

Next trip, we're renting one for the whole trip from an outside company, so we'll have it at Pop (to walk over to AOA) and to do DTD a couple times. I couldn't care less what anyone thinks!

BTW we also have a permanent hangtag for my car now, to park in handicapped spaces. My DD looks pretty healthy (unless you notice how she walks).

I can understand a little kid asking about it, or someone with limited understanding (autistic or such). But a grown adult asking - none of their business (or my sister's!).

 

[married2mm]

That is just plain rude! Hope he didn't ruin your day.

I was rather taken aback, however my family kept my spirits up.

 

[married2mm]

What did you say?

In his preamble; he asked did I mind...?

My spoken reply was "yes I do mind!"

My unspoken response was a longer version!!

 

[married2mm]

I just turned the tables and asked them why they wanted to know such a personal thing about someone they didn't know.

I wish I'd done this,but I was so surprised by their questions,it threw me.

 

[married2mm]

This was my thought exactly! I have a brother with autism and I can totally see him asking a stranger why they have a cane. Not trying to be rude or aggressive or anything else--just genuinely curious about such things! And just a simple, "Because I might fall without it" or something similar would send him on his way!

I have been around special needs adults and children all my life, and he may well have been on the spectrum. (As a pp said-who knows?)
In my experience,their line of questioning is much more direct and spontaneous.

In fact,last week in Mk a girl said to her mom look at that ladies cane;
her mom looked horrified & I said isn't it great, I've got lots of Mickey stickers on it.

 

[mom2AidanAndEli]

I have been around special needs adults and children all my life, and he may well have been on the spectrum. (As a pp said-who knows?)
In my experience,their line of questioning is much more direct and spontaneous.

I've been around my brother my whole life and, based on what you described in your original post, I can TOTALLY see him doing just this! I can also see a couple of his roommates at the group home doing the same thing!

If he were really curious, he's perseverate on it until he got an answer. That might mean following you for a bit to try to figure it out. Then finally just absolutely needing an answer so coming around you to ask the question. He doesn't have great social skills so wouldn't think anything of stepping in front of you to ask something.

Not saying this is the case here--of course, we have no idea--but just offering that it's a very plausible explanation to what you considered "weird" behavior.

 

[powellrj]

I am stopped and questioned all the time about my scooter. It is unusual because its a Tzora travel scooter in pink. The other day a lady was asking so many questions that when she left, DD said she was waiting for her to ask to try it out! I just smile and answer all the questions I can about it.

I agree it sounds like he could have been on the spectrum.

 

[Lisaloo]

When someone asks me a rude question I respond with "why do you ask". It amazes me how some people think they should be privy to personal information.