What a normal person you are Ian!!!

Wardrobes, how sensible too.
I want to know what hose pipes are called over there, also semi-detached houses too. Do you say car hire or car rental?
Oh, and while we are at it, why take the 's' off maths! Is it not mathematics, or mathematic?
I think hoses are either called just that, hoses or garden hose. If there's a ban I think they say "watering ban." Such things just don't happen in Chicago. Not sure why, unless it's because of the rather large, some might say, great fresh water lake we're next to.
We say car rental not hire. In fact in almost every case where the British say, "hire" we say "rental."
I don't have an answer for the difference between math and maths. If we do say the full word, it does have the "s" on the end making it a plural, but I don't think it resides as a plural in our collective conscious. The "s" might also be dropped because it makes it, as a shortened form, a bit awkward to say, what with the "th" sound followed by the "s".
Many of our words are also different because of the original colonizers. Hence we have the word cookie for a small cake coming from the early Dutch colony and the word "koekje" which means little cake. Or the term for the front steps of a house being called the "stoop" which also comes from the Dutch.
In other cases we retained the original British words that were in use when the first immigrants came over in the 1640's.
Hence we use the perfectly acceptable Elizabethan word "platter" which refer a very specific type of serving dish, whereas the British, lost the specificity and evolved to the generic word, "dish."
We also retained the more British word, "Fall" for the season, where as the English gravitated over time towards the French word, Autumn.
Shakespeare would have been extremely comfortable and used the word "mad" to refer to anger. He would have also thought nothing of conjugating the verb, "to get" with the form "gotten." A conjugation of the verb that fell out of use in the UK, but is very much preserved and alive in the US (and a very useful form of the verb too I might add.).
Marilyn - if it makes you any more comfortable, I am completely bilingual and will be most happy to speak to you and John in UK English, though I have never really been able to master the accent. Even after 4 years of living there.