Want to Send Someone Special To Disney World

[disykat]

So now you know that she's prohibited from accepting a gift over $25, yet you are still going to offer her a trip to WDW? I see no purpose, except your own gratification, in going ahead with the gift.

You are putting her in a very uncomfortable position. She will jeopardize her career if she even considers accepting. Therefore, she'll probably refuse but very likely feel awkward with you from now on.

If you really are just grateful and generous then ask her what equipment you might donate to make her job easier. Then make the donation through the school.

I agree. I don't see how it could possibly be seen as generous to do something that you've been told, even by her own employer, is inappropriate and not allowed. You could cost her her career, or at the very least, her reputation.

As a substitute teacher, a parent once wrote me a glowing review. She sent it to me and a copy to the prinicipal. Guess who never worked at that school again? Seriously, those kinds of things are looked upon with suspect, even if the intentions were good. Even the fact that this professional had a conversation with you about her inability to afford WDW could be seen as inappropriate by some. It's easy for me to see how it could have come up, but very easy for someone to misinterpret as well. Even Ellen, Oprah, etc. are not giving these things to people they are professionally involved with.

 

[DOREEN1779]

I hope that is sarcasm because wink and a nod kind of situations that you are suggesting get people fired.

All these "suggestions" people have for getting around policies do not change the nature of what the gift is and can have serious consequences when people start playing games like this.

Beyond policy, I would never be comfortable accepting something like that from someone. It's just too much even though the intentions are good.

A bad attempt at sarcasm. I used the wrong icon. All gifts over a certain amount can be looked upon as "kickbacks" and not worth it. Also, the therapists I have are privately paid.

The best gift you can give is a letter to the school acknowledging all that she has done for your family and what a great therapist she is, why you believe she will be a tremendous asset to the school and detail why. It will go a long way.

 

[Nayan]

Why do you not believe there is a risk?

I saw these kinds of things end badly more than once during my years of experience. Just the appearance of impropriety is enough to cause a problem.

Posters are not angry or jealous, they are trying to convey very legitimate concerns but some people seem blinded because Disney is involved.

Exactly. Plus, try to explain to your husband that because you accepted a gift you got fired and your reputation as a speech therapist is now trashed. She may love her job but she also might need it badly to make ends meet. So then she would have a very angry husband, no job, bills piling up but oh yeah, she has a gift card that she will now probably never use to Disney. Bad, bad idea.

 

[Allison]

A bad attempt at sarcasm. I used the wrong icon. All gifts over a certain amount can be looked upon as "kickbacks" and not worth it. Also, the therapists I have are privately paid.

The best gift you can give is a letter to the school acknowledging all that she has done for your family and what a great therapist she is, why you believe she will be a tremendous asset to the school and detail why. It will go a long way.

Thank you for clarifying.

 

[ceecee]

I would disagree that. I've seen several school employees fired and/or denied tenure over ethics violations.

I'm a little confused as to who the Therapist supposedly works for currently however - is she employed by the School District or is she currently part of Birth to 3 Intervention?

It's happened here. She has her answer, she called the school board and if she is in fact an employee of that school that is the answer.
A free trip to Disney is not worth your career!!!

 

[diamondpixienc]

I would price out what it would cost and put it on a Disney Gift Card. That way even if they cant go right away they would atleast have a huge portion of the total cost already paid for. What a great gift of appreciation to give BTW

 

[lost*in*cyberspace]

Sounds like a lot of jealously in here.

Jealous of what

I am really surprised by the number of posters who are encouraging the OP to give such an inappropriate gift to the speech therapist, expecting her to ignore the rules of her employer and jeopardize her job, as well as disregarding the code of ethics for her profession. There are reasons for these rules and codes. I would hope the whole issue is moot, because if this woman is as good as the OP states, she won't even consider accepting this. It will just be an embarrassment for the OP.

 

[vicki_c]

I can't believe this is even still being encouraged when the OP called the school and found out it's not okay? There shouldn't be any need for encouragement after that, and I can also not believe the OP got that answer and said she's going to do it anyway (although I understand the continued discussion about trying to talk her out of it).

 

[Colormyworld]

Edit: Didn't read the thread carefully enough. It'd probably be best to just stick with the kind letter to the supervisor and, if you'd like, a Disney gift card that is an acceptable amount (<$25).

 

[deegack]

Just ask her boss first and make sure it's okay. I think it's wonderful.

If her boss says it's okay, buy it for her but in a way that she could still reject it if she wanted to. Like give her that says surprise that you are buying her a trip. Then if she rejected it, you wouldnt lose your money.

She did ask her employer. The answer was no more than $25. All doing this would Sonia embarrass the therapist and put her in an awkward situation

 

[sritter78]

I had a student a few years ago whose family owns a house in Orlando. They gave me an amazing deal last summer-9 nights for $1100. Was it inappropriate for me to rent from them since they gave me such a discount?

 

[mrsklamc]

Do the rules say how often you can give a $25 gift? Can you give her a $25 gift once a month?

 

[crisi]

I had a student a few years ago whose family owns a house in Orlando. They gave me an amazing deal last summer-9 nights for $1100. Was it inappropriate for me to rent from them since they gave me such a discount?

If the fair market value of the rental was significantly more than that, and you were under an ethics policy, then yes, you were probably in violation of your employers ethics policy. If the house was going to sit empty that week or the fair market value was in the $1100 ballpark (which a lot of houses in Orlando go for) then no, it wasn't inappropriate. Read your own ethics policy.

 

[TDC Nala]

I had a student a few years ago whose family owns a house in Orlando. They gave me an amazing deal last summer-9 nights for $1100. Was it inappropriate for me to rent from them since they gave me such a discount?

Are you a public employee? If so, does the system you work in have an ethics policy that covers gifts or discounts given by students or families of students? Was the discount so steep as to be disproportionate to what they would normally charge for the house for 9 nights?

Where I work (not a school system) there is actually an ethics officer that we would contact and ask questions like this.

All the OP was being asked to do was check to find out if the therapist, who is an employee of the public school system, could ethically accept a monetary gift of around $1000 in gratitude for the job she did, before actually putting that on a Disney gift card to give her. I don't know what's wrong with that. If she finds out it's against the school system's ethics policy and decides to give it anyway, that's a decision she will have to make and one her therapist will have to make about whether to accept it or not.

Can you give her a $25 gift once a month?

It would then take 40 months (about 3 and 1/3 years) to give her $1000.

 

[sritter78]

Yes, I am a teacher. The discount was about $100 per night based on this years rates. Technically, my in-laws were the ones that rented it.
I NEVER thought of it as a gift. I haven't had their child in class for 3 years and will never have her in class again as they now homeschool.

 

[latmck]

It is amazing to me that OP will go against the school district policy. The school disctict said no more than $25 but you are going ahead any way. Wow!!!
It is a great, generous offer but you are jeopardizing the speech therapist's job and career. As a counselor, I can't accept no gift less than $25 either. When a client's parents give a gift card, I turned it down. I have told the parents that it is against the company's policy and the code of ethnics. Personally, I will feel bad if I took the gifts because I was doing my job as a good counselor. OP, I hope that you don't jeopardize this young lady's career. She can help other kids like she helped your son.

 

[NoNameNecessary]

I don't know what I can say that hasn't already been said.

I'm a teacher. I would NEVER, EVER, under ANY circumstances, accept such a gift. In fact, being presented with it would be awkward and embarrassing and would make me fret about the safety of my job.

I hate to toot my own horn, but I'm a good teacher. I work hard, and I know I change lives. That doesn't mean I'm entitled to gifts. I do this because it's my job, and I'm paid to do it.

To be fair, I would be very uncomfortable accepting a $1000 gift from ANYONE--even from my own family.

Don't assume you can keep this gift "secret". Word WILL get out, and this poor woman will have to answer for it, and will get a written repremand and maybe even get fired.

No, I am not jealous. I'm just concerned for this woman.

 

[crisi]

Yes, I am a teacher. The discount was about $100 per night based on this years rates. Technically, my in-laws were the ones that rented it.
I NEVER thought of it as a gift. I haven't had their child in class for 3 years and will never have her in class again as they now homeschool.

If the school knew, they could investigate it as an ethics violation, assuming such an ethics policy is in place. Who knows how it would have turned out. As your in laws wrote the check, as you haven't had the child in class for a number of years, those factors may have mitigated it.

But they would certainly be within their rights to investigate and make the determination on whether it was an ethics violation. I wouldn't mention it to my fellow teachers, one of them may rat you out.

This sort of thing is one where you really want to avoid any appearance of impropriety. Even if it is not found to be a violation, an ethics investigation is not a pleasant event.

(Don't teachers have to take a course on ethics during their education now? Post Enron, its a huge deal in business school. And its been a requirement for health care for years).

 

[sritter78]

I honestly never thought of it a a gift. She said she would give me a deal as a friend of the family.

 

[crisi]

I honestly never thought of it a a gift. She said she would give me a deal as a friend of the family.

Yeah, I know. People get into trouble with this with the best of intentions, never thinking that there could be impropriety. There are similar gotchas in tax law to be careful of.