***VENT***Upset by what I've seen

[dislal]

I have been volunteering this week at my kids elementary school for the book fair, and we noticed that a lot of the little things(erasers,bookmarks, pens, pencils) are missing, so today we really started watching them and there was at least one to two kids per class stealing these things

This is not an inner city school it is a little country area with about 90 kids per grade. If one of us adults was sure we saw them stealing we would tell the teacher and she would call them into her office and ask them and everyone of them would give back whatever they had stolen over to the teacher

I just wonder what are parents teaching these kids at home or what aren't they teaching them. WOW!!!

This just really upset me today and I needed to get it out I guess!

 

[happygirl]

I have been volunteering this week at my kids elementary school for the book fair, and we noticed that a lot of the little things(erasers,bookmarks, pens, pencils) are missing, so today we really started watching them and there was at least one to two kids per class stealing these things

This is not an inner city school it is a little country area with about 90 kids per grade. If one of us adults was sure we saw them stealing we would tell the teacher and she would call them into her office and ask them and everyone of them would give back whatever they had stolen over to the teacher

I just wonder what are parents teaching these kids at home or what aren't they teaching them. WOW!!!

This just really upset me today and I needed to get it out I guess!

I don't always think the parents are to blame. I think it sad that kids feel the need to steal such useless thing

 

[Ohiodislover]

Did these children have $$ to spend, or were they just taking to be taking? How old were they?

I understand and agree that it is disturbing. But did anyone look into why this was happening? Was there any trends, or did everyone just decide that these kids have lousy parents?
.

 

[mickeyboat]

DD9 came home this week really upset that one of her classmates was stealing things out of her desk - we're talking a mechanical pencil and erasers. After repeated requests to ask her teacher to get them back for her, the teacher told the class that whoever had her things could put them in her cubby during recess so that no one would know who took them. The items were in her cubby after recess.

At girl scouts a couple weeks ago another troop gave our girls a little gift - a daisy patch. Of 10 patches, 2 came up missing about 10 minutes after the gifts were opened. I am fairly certain I know what happened to them.

DD10 was out sick last week and several personal items in her desk were destroyed when she returned - ripped erasers, chewed on pencils. She was not happy that her friends would do that to her.

When DDs were in 2nd grade, I purchased enough silly putty for every child in the class to have one. The teacher used it to help with dexterity. One child stole several pieces and was caught with them in his backpack.

While I too am horrified that children don't seem to be taught to respect others' property, it doesn't surprise me anymore when kids steal stuff.

 

[Mom23Disneybelievers]

Your elementary school sounds just like ours! It is a common problem with the book fairs. I have been chairing them for years. We are sure to keep all of the little pencils, notebooks, and other junk right in front of the register. We also have a couple of parents volunteeers circulating around while the kids are shopping. I have a lot of thoughts on the "why" this is happening, but who really knows? I just find it is better to try to prevent the thefts, rather than have to deal with issues that come about once they have happened.

I have also started doing them in the middleschool, now that my oldest child is there. This past book fair, I had a teacher bring in an 8th grade boy that had PILES of erasers and other crappy toys. He must have filled his pockets. The teacher noticed the kid with the stuff and brought him in to return the it and to explain himself and apologize. The kid was MORTIFIED. The kicker was that he did it on a dare!

 

[surfergirl602]

On the other hand, I've seen kids pick up these small items in front of the register, not even knowing that they had to pay for them, after all, it was a "book" fair, not a pencil fair. They workers, parents, whomever had to remind them that they weren't free, but needed to be purchased, so maybe some kids just really don't know. I remember having to explain to my kids a few times while we were looking at books that those small things were there for people to buy if they wanted to, and weren't limited to just books.

 

[Tinijocaro]

I just wonder what are parents teaching these kids at home or what aren't they teaching them. WOW!!!

This just really upset me today and I needed to get it out I guess!

Don't assume the parents are at fault. Kids want things and sometimes will go to any length to get it, even if it goes against what they've been taught. It's a chronic problem-I caught a 5th grade student stealing $10.00 out of another kid's coat while watching a movie in the dark. Another really great student of mine was found out to have been writing some major graffiti on the bathroom walls-highly intelligent 5th grader who is extremely well-respected at school.

Heck, my own son stole a small toy out of the class prize box when he was in kindergarten.

 

[EMom]

We live in what could best be described as an affluent town. No economically disadvantaged kids at all. DD10 is in 4th grade and one girl has a serious case of five finger discount. I've been to the kid's house....it's worth several hundred thousand dollars and the family is most certainly not hurting for cash. She dresses in the latest styles, etc. Plain and simple, she steals like a bird attracted to shiny things.

Some kid in the class appears to be addicted to red felt tip pens because most of the kids are missing only the red ones....no others. They use red INK pens for marking papers, so the felt tips are not being used then, only for coloring. DD said it's been happening for ages. Just the red ones disappear, one by one. I kid you not, amazingly Miss Five Finger Discount still has HER red felt tip. (I asked.) Coincidence? Maybe....... DD finally went to her "home" stash of felt tips and took the red one from it for school. I am counting the days until it is kidnapped.

DD has also told me that another girl told her she went into her mom's purse and took $5 and the mom never noticed. Again, I know the family and the house is likely close to a million and money is not in short supply. Seriously, mommy probably has so much cash in her purse that she wouldn't miss a $50. Me, I rarely carry over $25, so I notice it all. The child has everything. There is no need to steal at all, yet she did.

In contrast, I grew up in a poor family and knew better than to steal. First, it was wrong. Second, heaven help me when my parents got ahold of my thieving rear end.

 

[shortbun]

Whoa, I volunteered from K to 5th on a weekly basis at least and I never noticed stealing or heard of it from the teachers. OTOH, now that DS is older, a couple of his classmates have stolen larger items and been caught because they are just stupid about it. These were poor kids stealing for pocket money-selling the items they stole for cash which I abhor but at least understand their goal. What is the reason these little ones are stealing do you think?

 

[Disneyadore]

Don't these parents never ask themselves how all these objects they never bought or were given as a present suddenly are in there child's possession?

Things just don't "magical' show up so I certainly would like to know were my kid got those items.
I guess many parent are just "seeing blind" as we call it.

 

[disneyjunkie]

This is not an inner city school it is a little country area with about 90 kids per grade

Would it be understandable or ok if the kids lived in the inner city?


Some kids can't control the impluse to have what they see. I don't think it has anything to do with inner city vs country or the parents.

 

[golfgal]

I have been volunteering this week at my kids elementary school for the book fair, and we noticed that a lot of the little things(erasers,bookmarks, pens, pencils) are missing, so today we really started watching them and there was at least one to two kids per class stealing these things

This is not an inner city school it is a little country area with about 90 kids per grade. If one of us adults was sure we saw them stealing we would tell the teacher and she would call them into her office and ask them and everyone of them would give back whatever they had stolen over to the teacher

I just wonder what are parents teaching these kids at home or what aren't they teaching them. WOW!!!

This just really upset me today and I needed to get it out I guess!

I am POSITIVE at some point and time your children have taken something that was not theirs. I wouldn't be so quick to bash other people's kids.

 

[Acklander]

I always thought that was a phase kids went through. I'm not saying EVERY kid does it, but enough kids do it at least once for it to be considered somewhat normal to take something that's not yours.
I don't think it's a reflection on the parents on what they're being taught or not being taught as far as right and wrong.

 

[Mickeypooh99]

I think it is a phase. I have a little boy I babysit for, and he was stealing legos from my boys a couple years ago. He was 8 at the time. This little boy had buckets of legos at home. His Grandma would buy him any set he asked for. Yet he would come to our house, and pocket my boys legos. He wasn't very discreet about it either, and I would catch him daily. He would just fill his pockets with the pieces he wanted. It was so sad. I thought I was going to have to stop babysitting him. His dad was so mad. I actually felt sorry for the kid when his dad picked him up one day. I don't think it was the parents fault in this case. Eventually he stopped, but I had to keep him out of my boys rooms for awhile until I could trust him again.

 

[Mickey'snewestfan]

This is not an inner city school it is a little country area with about 90 kids per grade. QUOTE]

As an inner city special educator, who has also previously in one of the ritziest private school, my kids are no more likely to do this than anyone else. This feels like an accusation or an expectation which hurts.

I know you meant no harm by this comment, but imagine what it's like for a moment for kids to grow up with the whole world expecting nothing but the worst from them. My kids have sooo many things to overcome, adding an expectation that they'll be criminals to it is too much.

 

[VAN]

Let's not get off track. Someone who could not afford something that was needed would at least be an "excuse" for stealing.

Stealing is wrong and is done for many reasons. When the more affluent kids steal, they are probably doing it for attention. Just keep stealing until they are caught and then - only then - do they get attention.

For whatever reason, our children are not learning that this behavior is not acceptable and will not be tolerated in the adult world.

It's sad ... very sad. But a reality in the world we live in.

 

[Arkansan]

My DD attends a "middle school" with 5-6 grades only. This fall at her book fair, the kids were not allowed to bring their backpacks or book bags into the room where the books (and pencils, etc.) were kept. I assume this was to deter theft from the book fair. The irony--she put her jacket on top of her book bag in the hallway and it was stolen!

When she came out to retrieve her things and get to class, she said her jacket was missing and it was clear someone had gone through her bag. She had nothing else taken, but also nothing of value in the bag. We talked about how sad it is that some kids don't have coats and think they need to take someone else's things. (Not the stealing necessarily, but that kids don't have necessities is true here--I just got an e-mail this week from my DS's elementary school asking for donations of mattresses for some children that have been sleeping on the floor! Next week the school social worker will be giving new spring/summer clothing--including underwear--to children that don't have any. There is a LOT of poverty and a lot of "wealth." The disparities are wide and growing here.) Anyway, DD was really glad her "mean parents" wouldn't let her take her cell phone to school that day!

Fortunately, she found the coat in the lost and found a few days later. She is very tiny and the Aeropostale jacket had 3/4 sleeves (full length on her) so I think it was too small for whoever took it or they felt bad and returned it. Either way, it worked out and it taught my DD a good lesson about being more careful with her things. I do wish, though, that the school would have had someone watching the book bags. If someone wants to steal something--no matter how old they are--they will find a way.

 

[lustergirl]

Would it be understandable or ok if the kids lived in the inner city?


Some kids can't control the impluse to have what they see. I don't think it has anything to do with inner city vs country or the parents.

I agree. Some people don't think before they post. I guess it would be okay if these kids were from the inner city where it is believed that all kids are poor. Oh quite contrare- I live in the inner city and my son goes to a private catholic high school. It bothers me that people live in such bubbles. Around here in Buffalo if something bad happens in a neighborhing suburb you have people get on the news and say things like "This doesnt happen in our neighborhood." That is so sad