Vent about bad friends...

[JerseyBallerina]

Last night, two of my friends went out with a group of people. I knew all of them but we're not really friends. They got ready at my place (one of the friends is my roommate) and talked to me about where they were going, who they were going with, etc. Never once did they ask if I wanted to come or ask if I had plans for the night.

Then the group of friends came by to pick them up. One guy was already drunk and he wanted to know why I wasn't coming. I was not dressed to go out and at this point, I was mad. I just said I didn't want to. He kept pushing it because he was so drunk and then my friends asked if I wanted to come but everyone was already halfway out the door. I know they only asked because he made a big deal out of it.

Then they came back to my apartment to use the bathroom before going out to another bar. Still, no invitation. My roommate even came into my room to tell me what happened at the first bar.

They've been over my place all day talking about what happened. The three of us just had dinner and the whole time they were laughing about what everyone said. And when you're told what people said when they were drunk, it's not nearly as funny as when you actually see it.

This is probably going to be the topic of conversation for a week because one of guys kept saying he loved my roommate and now she thinks he actually does. They've been talking for two hours about what happened and how sloppy a drunk this guy was and I'm just getting more aggrevated and annoyed by them.

I'm not really looking for advice because I don't know what you have to give but I just needed to vent.

 

[freckles and boo]

Your "friends" sound very immature. Frankly, whenever anyone of any age gabs about drunken exploits it makes me cringe. Besides, how clueless are they that they didn't think to include you? Pretty rude.

 

[mommasita]

Definitely would not be friends of mine. .Sadly I did this behavior quite OFTEN, but with all my friends..
Hugs

 

[ChrisnSteph]

It doesn't sound like you really missed much, and I agree that your friends sound pretty immature. I'd be glad I missed the mess!

 

[powellrj]

truthfully, when this has happened I just nonchalantly say because I wasn't asked.

 

[DMickey28]

I, too, would be aggravated by not being asked ... even if I didn't want to go!!!

I have a group of "friends", I guess they really are just the SO's of my husband's co workers but I thought we were becoming friends. DH and I are the only married ones of the group and we are soon going to be parents!! This group of girls just started doing "Ladies Nights" two weeks ago. I didn't go to the first one b/c I had a very bad day and well, I am 8.5 months pregnant! So then we all, DH's co-workers and the SO's, went out to dinner that Saturday. Good Times ... I randomly get a group email on Tuesday and the next girls night that Wednesday and switching it to Thursday. This was the first I heard of it, based on the thread it seemed like it was on going and I was just added to it ... . They were also planning a beach day today ... I responded back to everyone, general stuff asking about what they are up to. I also put an few lines about how I was sorry that I am not being part of things right now but I am so tired and 9 months pregnant right now ... that I can't wait to hang out and have some drinks once DS is born ... blah blah blah. Not too touchy feel but some stuff .. NO RESPONSES ...

Now I feel sad ... So, the moral of my story ... doesn't change and "friends" are sometimes on "friends" when they want ... like once DS is born and they will all want to babysit for the first month before we are boring again!!!

 

[ziggystardust]

I totally get it. I have 2 roommates and while I totally love them when ever there is a group of 3 someone is always going to feel left out. Lately I've felt like that person a little. The only thing i can hope is that they're not doing it intentionally but I have no way of knowing that for sure.

 

[Mono~rail]

Probably not what you want to hear, but I think if this is worst you have to be upset over, you have a pretty good life.

 

[JerseyBallerina]

Yeah, I know my life could be a lot worse and I know I shouldn't be complaining about something that's so stupid but I've had a really bad week and this is just the icing on the cake. And it wasn't like they didn't invite me and then it was over. A couple of people they went out with just came over and they're screaming and laughing about what happened.

And they keep trying to involve me in the conversation. I try to look uninterested but they keep telling me stories about what happened and no one can agree because they were all drunk and no one remembers and they all arguing their point.

They must be really dense because I'm not responding, not asking questions, and I even started to read a magazine while they were talking but they keep talking to me.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

A couple of people they went out with just came over and they're screaming and laughing about what happened.

And they keep trying to involve me in the conversation. I try to look uninterested but they keep telling me stories about what happened and no one can agree because they were all drunk and no one remembers and they all arguing their point.

They must be really dense because I'm not responding, not asking questions, and I even started to read a magazine while they were talking but they keep talking to me.

Given the circumstances, I think I'd rather watch paint peeling than listen to this. Sorry you're stuck there.

 

[alliecats]

Yeah, I know my life could be a lot worse and I know I shouldn't be complaining about something that's so stupid but I've had a really bad week and this is just the icing on the cake.

Complain about whatever you feel like complaining about. Everyone needs to vent now and again and you don't need to apologize for it.
Sounded like really rude behavior to me...but I bet they would have been even worse drunk!

 

[Nancy]

Just come right out and tell them, I have no clue what you're talking about cause I wasn't there, and I wasn't invited until you were walking out the door.

Some people need to be told pretty bluntly before they get it.

 

[Mono~rail]

Yeah, I know my life could be a lot worse and I know I shouldn't be complaining about something that's so stupid but I've had a really bad week and this is just the icing on the cake. And it wasn't like they didn't invite me and then it was over. A couple of people they went out with just came over and they're screaming and laughing about what happened.

And they keep trying to involve me in the conversation. I try to look uninterested but they keep telling me stories about what happened and no one can agree because they were all drunk and no one remembers and they all arguing their point.

They must be really dense because I'm not responding, not asking questions, and I even started to read a magazine while they were talking but they keep talking to me.

Bless your heart, you poor thing. How awful!

 

[lulugirl]

Your friends were rude.
I thought you lived w/ your parents, did you just move into an apartment this week?

 

[Alyssa88]

Don't ever feel sorry for venting, this is obviously somehting that upset you and it is ok rant about it. People are affected differently by events, and it is wrong for someone to try and judge what you have been through.

I also hate when people go on and on about how drunk or high they were. I have a friend who will go on and on for days about funny things that happen that night, as if I wasn't there experiencing it all. I don't get it.

I am sorry they were so rude, they should have asked you to come along. I aggree that you should try to be blunt with them. Right now I htink you are being passive-aggressive (I should know- I am the queen of passive agressiveness, lol) and they are too dense to understand.

 

[DeterminedOne]

Rather than try and give you advice I will post my own vent about bad friends. I loaned a friend $40 on Wednesday that was supposed to be paid back on Friday. When I spoke to this friend on friday he mentioned how he got new rims for his truck and all the other bills he had to pay that day. Never one mention of the $$ he owes me. Haven't heard from his since Friday. GRRR!!!

 

[JerseyBallerina]

I live in the apartment when I'm away at school but with my parents when school is out.

And if you are the queen of passive agressiveness, I am the princess, lol. I hate getting into conflicts with my friends and I know this will start something. My roommate is a drama queen who looks for trouble wherever she can find it. We're only living together for two more months and I don't want to make our situation uncomfortable. For now, I'll stick to being as uninterested as I can be and see how long this lasts.

 

[JerseyBallerina]

DeterminedOne, I hate when there is a money issue between friends. It's so awkward to bring it up and more often then not, you never see that money again.

 

[Disney Doll]

You're having quite a bad week, JB, between the skeevy old man stalker and the lousy friends!!!

 

[JerseyBallerina]

^^Yeah, the one good thing that happened this weekend was that he stopped calling me. I keep making excuses for them, like they didn't think I would want to go out after dealing with that but at least ask.

To be honest, I probably wouldn't have gone anyway but that shouldn't matter. I'm just sick of everyone at this point, lol.