Thanks for all the replies. So it seems that V&A has fresher ingredients to choose from. Is there any other difference from Remy? One thing I loved about our experience at Remy was the ability to meet with the mater sommelier earlier that afternoon to discuss wine pairings for dinner. We have a group of 5 and wanted to buy a bottle for each course. It was so classy to just go and have all the food and wine already ordered. It was a great experience. Loved the little stool for your purse and being escorted to the restroom. I assume V&A does all that and more.
V&A used to have two different dining experiences: a 7-course and a 10-course. The 7 course had two options for each course plus some upcharge items if you wanted them; the 10 course was pre-selected with some upcharge items available (they will always show the prices for the upcharge items). Now they do an 8-12 course menu with pre-selected courses plus some upcharge items. The number and selection of those courses will be based on what the chef feels like doing plus what's in season and they're able to acquire plus modifications required for your preferences, dislikes and allergies and usually follows a progression from lighter to heavier proteins (e.g., vegetarian through seafood through poultry and pork through beef or other red meats then cheese course then 1-2 desserts). They will call about a week in advance to capture allergies/preferences. I'm at the point where I will inform them of my allergies and then leave absolutely everything to them.
Because they change menus based on availability and preferences/allergies, everyone gets their own personalized menu - if you have allergies that require a modification to what the menu might normally have had that night, it will be different from your dining companion's menu. So your menu will also display the optional wine pairing that has been chosen specifically to match your courses. If there's something on the menu that you really don't want/like when you see it, they'll do their best to find an alternative, but my advice is to try it. I will even eat ingredients that I don't generally like (mushrooms for example) because something made by a talented chef changes the whole ballgame.
One time a few years ago, DH's menu had an option for an ounce of caviar with blinis, sour cream and egg paired with a glass of iced vodka which he ordered. The next time, caviar was on the menu but no paired vodka listed. He asked for the chilled vodka with that and they had it, no problem (they must keep bottles in the freezer). The next time it wasn't on the menu at all but he asked if it was possible to get caviar and vodka and voila, it appeared. Last time it was listed on his menu. They keep records of previous diners. When they called me the last time they read back to me what it said on my file about allergies and asked if I had any new ones (I did). I wonder if they noted his liking for caviar on his file and added it to his menu specifically because of his past history.
If you want a specific wine or have specific likes and dislikes, you can tell them that when they call you but I've always found the wine pairings to be excellent. V&A often is able to buy wines from small productions so can have access to some very unique wines. If you add any of the upcharge items, they will have another wine chosen to match that. Or you can reject the pairing and ask for one or more glasses to pair with specific courses, or order a bottle or two that will match with all of the courses of the diners so that they can all partake, or they can substitute, or whatever. They'll work with you.
Yes, they will have a stool for your purse, I don't recall if they still escort you to the washroom or not, they'll either match your napkin to your clothes (black if you're wearing dark, white if you're wearing light) or use non-lint-bearing napkins so that they impact your clothing and when you do return from the washroom, they'll get you a fresh one. At the end of dinner, they'll present the women with a rose and they'll bring this big box of chocolates that you choose from so you only get your favourites.