6_Time_Momma
<font color=blue>Still crazy after all these years
- Joined
- Mar 24, 2001
- Messages
- 3,968
(UPDATE at the bottom)
I don't know if anyone remembers my post about my neice possibly being removed from her home and my mom and dad struggling with the decision of taking custody of her or not, but here is an update.
At the time of the hearing in Sept, the judge decided to give her mom another chance. They offered her every program they had--counselling, parenting classes, money management, financial, etc.
When I went to pick up Olivia from my mom's today, my mom was crying.
B's caseworker called my mom today and said another hearing was scheduled for this Thursday. She was going to recommend removal from B's mom and was 90% sure that the judge would follow her recommendations. She basically asked my mom if she and dad would consider taking custody of B. Seems in addition to the neglect, that there is an investigation going on as to inappropriate pictures being taken of my neice by a "friend" of her mom.
The caseworker told mom that unless B's dad (my brother) or mom and dad or another family member (me and my DH) would take custody, that B would go into foster care.
My mom talked to dad and both agreed they can't let her go into foster care. So, more than likely (assuming) the judge agrees, my mom and dad (who is retiring in April) will be parents again.
Obviously, while they feel this is the right thing to do, it is also extremely hard on them. They planned on travel, relaxation, etc during their retirement, not parenting.
My brother is not capable of caring for her. I haven't had a chance to talk to my DH yet, but I am not sure if we could take her on either, but I feel bad that my mom and dad will now have this responsibility.
It's going to be tough either way. One of her sister's will likely go to her dad. Neither one of her other sister and brother have father's listed, so they will be going into foster care. So, she will lose her mom and her brother and sisters. She already has some behavior issues, so mom told the caseworker flat out that she wants B in counselling if she takes her.
I expect that even if mom and dad take custody that we will be pretty involved too, as mom asked if I would help out with school matters, watching her if they do any travelling, etc.
So, all in all, I ask for your prayers for B and her brother and sisters, and for my mom and dad, as they embark on a journey they did not expect to be taking 2 months from retirment.
UPDATE:
Okay, so here's the update to my update. Today was the hearing, and the judge agreed with the caseworkers reccommendation and removed all four kids from their mom. B is now home with my mom and dad. Mom said it was pretty bad at the courthouse with the kids and their mom crying and such.
All three of the other kids went to foster care. The one sister's dad didn't want her, so she went too.
She came with no clothes or toys, so mom and dad stopped off to buy her two outfits and some underwear, shoes, and socks. The social worker said she could get some clothes and toys from the house (motel) tomorrow, but more than likely mom wouldn't want them as most were pretty undesirable. (She also had to buy a box of lice treatment).
So far tonight B has had a few crying jags of missing her mom and brother and sisters, saying she's never been away. My mom is telling her that her mom still loves her, but needs to get some things taken care of and fixed before she can take good care of her.
Anyway, she starts school on Monday....another big stepping stone. We're going over Sunday for dinner. I plan on buying her an outfit and toy to bring her. My daughters have been giving me several suggestions as to what toys we need to buy for her.
My mom says it'll all sink into her (Mom) in a few days and she'll probably call me with her own crying jag.
I just reinforced that we'd be there for whatever help she and dad needed.
I don't know if anyone remembers my post about my neice possibly being removed from her home and my mom and dad struggling with the decision of taking custody of her or not, but here is an update.
At the time of the hearing in Sept, the judge decided to give her mom another chance. They offered her every program they had--counselling, parenting classes, money management, financial, etc.
When I went to pick up Olivia from my mom's today, my mom was crying.
B's caseworker called my mom today and said another hearing was scheduled for this Thursday. She was going to recommend removal from B's mom and was 90% sure that the judge would follow her recommendations. She basically asked my mom if she and dad would consider taking custody of B. Seems in addition to the neglect, that there is an investigation going on as to inappropriate pictures being taken of my neice by a "friend" of her mom.
The caseworker told mom that unless B's dad (my brother) or mom and dad or another family member (me and my DH) would take custody, that B would go into foster care.
My mom talked to dad and both agreed they can't let her go into foster care. So, more than likely (assuming) the judge agrees, my mom and dad (who is retiring in April) will be parents again.
Obviously, while they feel this is the right thing to do, it is also extremely hard on them. They planned on travel, relaxation, etc during their retirement, not parenting.
My brother is not capable of caring for her. I haven't had a chance to talk to my DH yet, but I am not sure if we could take her on either, but I feel bad that my mom and dad will now have this responsibility.
It's going to be tough either way. One of her sister's will likely go to her dad. Neither one of her other sister and brother have father's listed, so they will be going into foster care. So, she will lose her mom and her brother and sisters. She already has some behavior issues, so mom told the caseworker flat out that she wants B in counselling if she takes her.
I expect that even if mom and dad take custody that we will be pretty involved too, as mom asked if I would help out with school matters, watching her if they do any travelling, etc.
So, all in all, I ask for your prayers for B and her brother and sisters, and for my mom and dad, as they embark on a journey they did not expect to be taking 2 months from retirment.
UPDATE:
Okay, so here's the update to my update. Today was the hearing, and the judge agreed with the caseworkers reccommendation and removed all four kids from their mom. B is now home with my mom and dad. Mom said it was pretty bad at the courthouse with the kids and their mom crying and such.
All three of the other kids went to foster care. The one sister's dad didn't want her, so she went too.
She came with no clothes or toys, so mom and dad stopped off to buy her two outfits and some underwear, shoes, and socks. The social worker said she could get some clothes and toys from the house (motel) tomorrow, but more than likely mom wouldn't want them as most were pretty undesirable. (She also had to buy a box of lice treatment).
So far tonight B has had a few crying jags of missing her mom and brother and sisters, saying she's never been away. My mom is telling her that her mom still loves her, but needs to get some things taken care of and fixed before she can take good care of her.
Anyway, she starts school on Monday....another big stepping stone. We're going over Sunday for dinner. I plan on buying her an outfit and toy to bring her. My daughters have been giving me several suggestions as to what toys we need to buy for her.
My mom says it'll all sink into her (Mom) in a few days and she'll probably call me with her own crying jag.
I just reinforced that we'd be there for whatever help she and dad needed.
