Update (Post 14) -- How to Tip the Scales

[NeverlandPixie]

(If I have posted this in the wrong place, please feel free to let me know where it would get better play).

I am trying to convince my best friend to come to Disney with my son and I in early December.

My friend has been separated for about a year and things are very messy. She is stressed to the point that she is physically making herself sick (throwing up at work, etc.) She almost came with me last year during my solo trip but bowed out at the last minute. She is VERY responsible and feels her money could be put to better use (which I understand and just FYI, the cost of the trip is of no concern, she has it and more). However, she really wants to come with us and she's pretty much sitting on the fence, ready to topple over to the Disney side. Her family agrees she needs a vacation, an escape, if you will. And so do her kids (boy 6, girl 7). They've heard it from my son, and me, and are very excited. In fact, her daughter even asked if they could come with us.

The kids have never been to WDW, never been outside of Manitoba, actually. My friend was in MK and PI for New Years about 10 years ago but that's it.

(I hope I've worded this right.)

So, Disney fans, how do I tip the scales?

Thanks.

 

[bridgie04]

Because money seems to be her underlying concern, sit down and do a very careful, detailed budget for her. Factor all things in, transportation, food, souveniers, etc. Consider staying offsite and stretching your accommodation and food dollars even more.

Maybe if you lay it all out and help avoid any surprises she might feel more comfortable.

GL>

 

[bridgie04]

I misread your post.

No advice just good luck and

 

[NeverlandPixie]

Thanks, already done that. She doesn't want to stay offsite at all. I'm already booked at a mod. The money isn't an issue. She just has to justify a Disney trip to herself.

 

[frtchr]

Maybe if you go at it from her kids' point of view, she might fall right off the fence. Kids are much more empathetic than we give them credit for, and if mom is stressed, chances are pretty good that the kids can feel that stress, too. Yes, money can ALWAYS go to something "better" than a vacation (and actually, I don't know if I even believe that myself!) but having quality family time is worth every single penny, IMHO. I hope she decides to go with you, and I hope it's a great trip!

 

[Cruz91]

Tell her to log on to the DisBoards and read a little, then ask a few people's opinions about if she should go or not. I think we all know the answer she'll get in here.

If that doesn't work, tell her what my wife and I have adopted as our philosophies...

1) Money is always best spent on making memories with your familly.
2) Your kids only really want to be with you for a finite period of time before they decide they are way too cool for you. You should take advantage of every minute of that time you can.

 

[Maggie'sMom]

I agree about making this about the kids. Divorce is really hard on kids. (Not that it isn't hard on adults too, but we have a better understanding of what's happening and why.) Point out that this will be stress relief for the kids as well as her. And it's a time when they can make some happy memories together, even in the midst of all this turmoil.

 

[proteus]

Stress is a very bad thing and can cause issues later on. A childhood friend of mine got stood up at her marriage and she died of cancer about 10 years later at a young age. I don't know if it was related but she did go through a year of mental anguish and I'm certain that didn't help.

A distraction like WDW is the best thing, you have to take of yourself and money can't always be the top priority. Put her on some scary rides, and she will forget the past, lol.

 

[NeverlandPixie]

1) Money is always best spent on making memories with your familly.
2) Your kids only really want to be with you for a finite period of time before they decide they are way too cool for you. You should take advantage of every minute of that time you can.

How true! Thanks for that!

 

[mom2my2gr8kids]

I agree about making this about the kids. Divorce is really hard on kids. (Not that it isn't hard on adults too, but we have a better understanding of what's happening and why.) Point out that this will be stress relief for the kids as well as her. And it's a time when they can make some happy memories together, even in the midst of all this turmoil.

I totally agree! My divorce was final in Dec. 06 and I got my settlement mid January 07, the day I got my settlement I called Disney, booked a trip for myself and kids and 2 weeks later I picked them up from school early and said we need to hurry to the airport we are going to Disney! It was the best trip we have done so far!!! Tell her, the stress relief for the kids alone is WELL worth it!

 

[stella27]

Why don't you inform her that you will be taking her kids with you, and that you would love it if she would come along? I think that would do it. Just stress that her children deserve a great vacation after such a trying time, and that you intend that they go. Even if you have to take them yourself.

 

[hollyd99]

Southern Manitoba...flat flat flat.....

Just the sight of a palm tree gets me so excited! Oh and any sort of hill. "oh look, it's like a mountain!".

Even though money isn't an issue, if she waits any longer, plane fares will be even more insane! But besides that, once the plane takes off, you leave everything behind. Just getting away will clear her mind and she would come back with a lot more happiness and could maybe look at her life with new eyes.
I thnk getting her kids nagging at her might add to her stress and not work at all.
I agree with directing her to the boards. I smile and laugh everytime I log on and read other people's stories, It makes me even more excited for my trip!

 

[rt2dz]

I'd stress the kids. Talk about the memories to be made by doing something special. Talk about the learning experiences. Every outing for a child is a learning experience; I'm not talking about the Epcot aspects, although that is worth mentioning. Talk about de-stressing the family.

Oh, and if that doesn't work, try blackmail. JOKE!

 

[NeverlandPixie]

Thanks for all your advice, but I've got an update for you ...

She's coming!!!

We booked our rooms (CBR was the only moderate left with a CAA discount), and are now searching airfares, etc. Even cooler, when we booked, they asked if we were interested in one the new pirate rooms! Checked our ressie email, and there was no additional charge (we'll see what we get when we get there though ... no biggie).

Anyways, we made some dining ADRs (Akerhaus dinner, Garden Grill dinner and Sci-Fi lunch). We're keeping our fingers crossed for an opening at Ohana, Chef Mickey's or Tusker House for breakfast (the kids are all big Stitch fans). We are also trying to get the kids on the Pirates of the Caribbean Adventure cruise at CBR but are booked solid for the three dates we are there. (Just keep calling back, right?)

I'm just so excited I get to take 3 first-timers with us ... and she's letting me do all the planning ... heaven or what?