UPDATE pg. 2.. Oh my! What happened to my trip???

[snoopy]

Great news, C. Ann.

 

[DMRick]

We'll be together for the parades and Wishes, but other than that there will be no "togetherness"

You are a better person than I to still believe the mil will be sweetness and kind. This is your DD mil..think about it and the past. Re read what she said to you in that phone call. She'll have to control her son. She'll have to butt into everything and tell her son what to do LOL. Poor you guys. I was hoping your dd would have a nice relaxing, stressfree, non confrontational vacation.

 

[Kallison]

Have fun - don't take any crap from those IL's!!

 

[marymrg]

C.Ann - I hope all goes well with your trip. You all could use some sunshine. I read the post about your mil's phone call..........It was probably her precursor to inviting herself (guilting her son into it).

I think I would've said, sorry, maybe another time. Even with ground rules established ahead of time, with that many people (some who don't want to get along - read mil), sometimes things don't always go as planned. I think it would be great to have your sil go, without his mommy. He would have a better time without her. (or so it seems from your previous posts) He is going to be in the middle of it, because his mother will orchestrate it that way.

Do you really believe son-in-law will talk to her about her "lack of pixie dust" issues? And, if she does, will you trust her to keep her mouth shut?

I hope you prove me wrong. Really, it sounds like you need to have a break from what life has dealt all of you this past year. Happy planning!!

 

[dianeschlicht]

Sounds like a great time. We will be there at the same time!

 

[FINFAN]

You're doing great CAnn.....We are a family of 4 and have agreed that wewill need to split at times this Christmas trip...due to crowd volume if nothing else! I, myself, ALWAYS take an hour or so at MK and find a nice bench and sit and just take it all in, BY MYSELF! I have met some of the nicest folks doing this and it is an attraction all it's own to let my imagination wander to put a "story" to each family/group I see go by...and also gives my feet a much needed rest! Sounds like your DD, DGD and SIL are going to be most supportive of any plans you have, and you have been very selfless in taking up anyones time. This will be so fun! That's awesome that it may cost less....how cool is that? I think it is planning out extremely well....WAY better than if it were my family....we'd have to add the expense of a personal therapist to the trip!LOL!!!!

Pam

 

[C.Ann]

First of all, I want to thank all of you who are happy for me in regards to this trip - and I would also like to address those that have "concerns" - before I give you all the update..

The first thing that we all need to remember here is that Disney World is open to the public.. Therefore, anyone (including the in-law's) can go anytime they want - invited or not.. They chose to go at the same time that we are for obvious reasons - our granddaughter - and from what I understand there will be other areas of interest they will be visiting both on their way down and on their way back.. With the motor home and the liberal bank account they have to work with they are able to do this and I'm happy for them.. Life is short and we all have to live it to the fullest while we still have our good health..

When I posted the other day about the MIL's phone call, I truly believe that it was a major case of envy - that we were going (DD, granddaughter, & I) and that she was not.. Although I would have handled it differently, I can certainly understand her being jealous that DGD was going to have the opportunity to experience something so very extra special and she wasn't going to be there to see it..

After my SIL made the impulse decision to go along too that is when the in-laws decided that they were going to drive down during the same time period.. None of us could have very well said, "You know what? WE own Disney World and therefore YOU can't go while we're there.." That's just plain silly and with my DGD seeing them every single day of her life, it's not like we could have kept this trip a "secret" until we left.. The in-laws are both retired and can pick up and go on a minutes notice, so they still could have said, "You know what? We're going to go down too.."

The Sept. 2001 trip was definitely a tough one - for many reasons - and not just the in-laws or my SIL's grumpy attitude.. Not only were the in-laws along, but 3 of my SIL's aunts as well.. However, that was my son-in-law & DD's trip - NOT mine - and therefore, I didn't have a lot of say in what should or shouldn't be done.. I came along as a "guest" and felt as though I should act like one..

Son-in-law did in fact have a nice chat with his parents already and informed them that he was coming along on MY vacation this time around and therefore I would be making the decisions and he would be going along with whatever I planned.. He made it perfectly clear to his parents that NOTHING would revolve around "their" schedule - rides, shows, eating times, etc. - but they were free to go off on their own and do whatever they chose.. We would not be setting up times and places to "meet up" with them and if they wanted to be where we were at any given time then it would be up to THEM to track us down (via cell phone) and do so..

Last night the in-laws decided to stay at the lake one more night (with our DGD) and drive me home today as I had gone up with my DD originally and they left last night.. We talked about the trip at the campfire last night and then again today (on the way home in the motor home) I made it perfectly clear where I stood on this trip.. It's great that they're coming down - great that they'll experience the excitement of our DGD - but this is MY trip and it won't be manipulated by anyone else (of course I used "nicer" words to get that across to them - LOL).. They were fine with that (they actually have some solo plans of their own) - and understand that SIL, DD & DGD have been invited to go on MY vacation and it just so happens that "they" have chosen to be there at the same time.. Most evenings they plan on heading back to their motor home early (they don't stay up late at all) and will probably leave the MVMCP long before midnight..

The way I feel about it personally is that negativity breeds negativity and as a counselor once pointed out to me, there is something called "self-fulfilling prophecy".. If one goes into a situation with a negative attitude there is a 99.9% chance they are going to HAVE a negative experience.. Also - if you "convince" yourself that a situation is going to be "bad" you can MAKE it bad subconsciously (thus the self-fulfilling prophecy)..

I will NOT go into this trip with a bad attitude.. The ground rules have been laid down for everyone - including my SIL.. Nothing has changed - I will do what I want, when I want, where I want.. Those who think they will enjoy it and want to come along are free to do so - those that don't want to can choose to do something else.. I can't decide who can or can't go to Disney World at any given time - however, I can decide HOW I will respond to any situation and that response is MY personal responsibility..

I'm still planning the "meet" for after the MVMCP ends on Dec. 2nd and I would love to meet up with whoever is interested.. In-laws are NOT interested and will be leaving the party early.. My friend from Florida would love to meet my fellow DIS'ers - as would my SIL, DD and granddaughter.. Be forewarned though - my DD is going to be checking you out VERY carefully.. She wants to make sure my cyber friends here on the DIS aren't serial killers - LOL!!!

I'm going to Disney - we're going to have a blast - and that my friends, is the end of THAT story..

Oh - and I DID get the MVMCP tickets ordered tonight for Thursday, December 2nd so it's a definite.. If you're interested in meeting, please let me know..
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We're going to Disney!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Serena]

 

[msteddom]

C. Ann, I just got back yesterday from a trip that sounds similar to the one you're planning. I was originally going to go solo, then my aunt and her daughter wanted to come. Then my other aunt was feeling left out so she and her three children decided to join us. Then my mother decided that there was no way that her sisters and her daughters were going ona trip without her, so she and my dad joined us for a few days. All told we were a group of 9. The trip definitly had it's frustrating moments but it turned out really well. Just remember that this won't be you last trip to WDW (God willing) and that you will get to do things more your own way next time. Good luck!


Melissa

 

[binny]

Have a wonderful time C Ann. With your wonderful attitude and spirit I KNOW you will have a great time and those around you cant help but be happy!!

 

[marymrg]

It sounds like you have everything worked out and the ground rules are out in the open! Happy planning.

 

[C.Ann]

Originally posted by marymrg
It sounds like you have everything worked out and the ground rules are out in the open! Happy planning.

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LOL.. No need to "stand corrected".. I can certainly understand the concerns expressed by you and some others and I appreciate the fact that you cared enough to even BE concerned.. But the bottom line is that I can control my vacation if I choose to do so.. If I let others run rough shod over me then I would have to hold MYSELF accountable - not someone else..

Granted - MIL can be rude, a pain in the butt, etc. - but - so can my SIL, my own DD, my DH, and even ME!! It's how I choose to handle it that counts..

I'm going to Disney in December - a dream come true.. I'm going to MVMCP - another dream come true and I'll have my SIL, DD and DGD there with me too boot - another dream come true.. I'm going to stay on Disney property for the very first time - something I thought I would NEVER do.. I'm trying to get a "meet" together with some of the great folks on this board - another dream come true..

I feel GREAT about this trip - I don't have ANY qualms at all - and my DGD is SOOOOOOOOOO thrilled that all of the people she loves the most in the world are going to be there, how could anyone feel negative about THAT?

"Responsibility - the ability to respond in any manner you choose.." That's the secret key to true happiness..

 

[KimRaye]

Originally posted by C.Ann
I'm going to Disney - we're going to have a blast - and that my friends, is the end of THAT story..
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We're going to Disney!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WELL SAID, C.ANN! You WILL have a blast!!

 

[kejoda]

C.Ann your an amazing woman with a great attiude! I know you'll have a great time.

 

[DMRick]

Sorry, if my negative attitude was a downer..however, everything I posted was based on your postings and private IM's over the past year about the in law, and I was thinking about you and your dd's happiness. Hopefully, everyhting WILL work out and be just as magical as you wish, and your positive attitude will override anything the mil says or does. You certainly deserve to have a good time after the year you have had.

 

[C.Ann]

Originally posted by DMRick
Sorry, if my negative attitude was a downer..

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Your negative attitude (which by the way, is NOT the title I would put on it) wasn't a "downer" for me at all.. I'm honored that anyone on these boards would care enough about me and my feelings to express their concerns.. That could never be construed by me as being "negative" - or being a "downer"..

You & I didn't "know" each other back when I went to Disney with the "gang" in 2001, but I can tell you that from day one I had some VERY strong misgivings.. Mainly because I was a "guest" on someone elses vacation and therefore felt I pretty much had no say about anything at all..

I don't have any of those misgivings this time.. Not one single qualm - because this is MY vacation.. Anyone who comes along - or happens to be there at the same time - is free to do what they want on their time.. I've already made my plans and no one is going to change them..

I feel really good about this trip and I'm hoping that my first stay on Disney property at such an incredibly GREAT cost will encourage me to make more trips down there in the future when the SW airfares and the room rates become available at the same time.. (Ummmmmm - like "someone" I know here - LOL) I'm also going to try to wander around alone for a bit while I'm there too - maybe take a bus to the parks or something - to get a feel of how I would do alone..

'Course if I end up being a "frequent flier" and taking multiple trips to Disney each year, you know who I'm going to "blame" - right? LOL

Its gonna be okay because..................................



We're going to Disney!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Kallison]

I think any negative attitudes or perception of them was due to the fact that people care about you and want you to have a wonderful trip. I hope it all works out, I like the emphasis on "MY trip", that is the way to do it.

 

[Sandy V.]

C.Ann - you are a very wise woman, and you have a tremendous attitude. The world needs more people like you!

I hope you have a wonderful time on YOUR vacation!!

You are so right - no one else can make you miserable unless YOU let them!