Update 11/23/02 Good News - Mailing letter to my biological father tomorrow

[Tiffany]

Update as of 11/23/02

So he could not get the whole day off tomorrow the 24th so we cannot meet in person tomorrow. We will be talking to each other the begining of next week and hopefully he will be able to get time off of work and we should be able to meet in person over the long Holiday weekend.

Thanks again for all of the support.

Tiffany

Hi All,

I have no memories of my biological father not even a picture. I do have a name, birthdate, job at the time of my birth and this week I was able to track down an address and telephone number and some additional information about him. Well, I have written the letter and my husband will be putting it in the mailbox later on this morning.

Need a little pixie dust that after 30yrs he will answer the letter. According to my mother the last contact he had with her was around the time of my second birthday July of 1972.

He has also had two other childern that I have found out about by two other women. So I guess I have two half brothers out there. I will be sending letters to them after I give my father a chance to respond to his letter first.

Anyone out there been in this type of situation? Looking for their biological parent or parents? I guess siblings also. The fact that I have two other brothers it just hitting me.

Thanks for listening/reading.

 

[DisMNagain]

I was *found* by my biological daughter 7 years ago.

Feel free to PM me if you want. I'd be glad to share with you about where we all sit now, 7 years later.

 

[tiggerlover]

I've never been in this kind of a situation, but wanted to send some pixie dust and good thoughts your way. Best wishes, I hope everything turns out well for all involved.

 

[Mamu]

Sending some Pixie Dust your way.

 

[EROS]

Best of Luck!!!!

 

[helenabear]

I haven't been in this situation, but I wanted to wish you and all involved the best of luck!

 

[Tony-NJ]

everything works out for you! Sending pd your way!

 

[montessori]

I have a friend who was found by her sister after 40 years.
This girl searched out and found my friend and her mother.
These girls have the same mother and father. The parents were going through a divorce when the mother became pregnant (these things do happen) and the mother gave the little girl up for adoption.
My friend knew nothing about it until her sister contacted her mother and her mother told her what had happened.
It was shocking but they have gotten together a few times and it's working out just fine.
I guess a person would have to be ready for rejection when contacting someone in a situation like this. Some people may not be at the right place in their lives to handle it, and the person seeking out the relationship has to be strong and know that it isn't anything personal against them.
Of course, it works out wonderfully many many times and I hope it does for you!
Good luck!

 

[Tiffany]

Originally posted by DisMNagain
I was *found* by my biological daughter 7 years ago.

Feel free to PM me if you want. I'd be glad to share with you about where we all sit now, 7 years later.

Thanks for the offer DisMNagain. I just sent you a PM.

 

[snoopy]

My brother was found by his biological daughter two years ago. The mother had always claimed he wasn't the father, but we all knew differently since the child was the spitting image of him and our family. She took the child and moved away, and we never saw her again until a year ago. She is now 17 and has a lot of problems, which very well could have been prevented if her mother had just told her the truth so many years ago. She did finally tell her the truth at age 15, such a vulnerable age for teenaged girls.

Its been a bit difficult on my brother, who is now married and has two other kids. We have welcomed her into the family, but she does have some emotional problems that we are trying to iron out. We want her to feel comfortable here with us, but its hard for her, I guess. We have a large and close knit family and I think its a bit overwhelming to her. We plan to change that though. My brother will have her over the summer, and she mentioned that she would like to go to Community College here, so we hope to get to know her better then.

Good luck to you! Let us know how it turns out.

 

[Tiffany]

I would just like to say thank you to all of you who have sent Pixie Dust my way. You guys are great. I cannot believe how much support I have been shown just in the last few hours.

 

[Tiffany]

Originally posted by montessori
I have a friend who was found by her sister after 40 years.
This girl searched out and found my friend and her mother.
These girls have the same mother and father. The parents were going through a divorce when the mother became pregnant (these things do happen) and the mother gave the little girl up for adoption.
My friend knew nothing about it until her sister contacted her mother and her mother told her what had happened.
It was shocking but they have gotten together a few times and it's working out just fine.
I guess a person would have to be ready for rejection when contacting someone in a situation like this. Some people may not be at the right place in their lives to handle it, and the person seeking out the relationship has to be strong and know that it isn't anything personal against them.
Of course, it works out wonderfully many many times and I hope it does for you!
Good luck!

Thanks montessori. I am somewaht prepared for no response from by biological father but not 100%. My mother said that he never denied I was his child it was just that he was young and just faded out of the picture after my second birthday when he found out my mother was dating someone else. My mother and my biological father were no longer in a relationship at this point. The someone else ended up being my stepfather but we never bonded for many different reasons and after my mother divorced him we no longer speak.

Well, I guess all I can do now is wait and see. That is why I think I need all of the Pixie Dust that I can get.

 

[Tiffany]

Originally posted by snoopy
My brother was found by his biological daughter two years ago. The mother had always claimed he wasn't the father, but we all knew differently since the child was the spitting image of him and our family. She took the child and moved away, and we never saw her again until a year ago. She is now 17 and has a lot of problems, which very well could have been prevented if her mother had just told her the truth so many years ago. She did finally tell her the truth at age 15, such a vulnerable age for teenaged girls.

Its been a bit difficult on my brother, who is now married and has two other kids. We have welcomed her into the family, but she does have some emotional problems that we are trying to iron out. We want her to feel comfortable here with us, but its hard for her, I guess. We have a large and close knit family and I think its a bit overwhelming to her. We plan to change that though. My brother will have her over the summer, and she mentioned that she would like to go to Community College here, so we hope to get to know her better then.

Good luck to you! Let us know how it turns out.

Thanks snoopy. I am a bit older then your nice as I am 32yrs old and have been married for almost 9 and half years now. I am not looking for anything from him. I would just like to know the other side of my family. My mothe never lied to me. I was about 6 or 7 when I saw wedding pictures of my mother and the man I called "daddy" and I was in the pictures not as an infant but as a toddler (25mos). I guess I asked how I could be in the pictures if marriage is suppossed to come before the babies and my mother told me that "daddy" was not my biological "daddy". As I got older I asked more questions and she always answered honestly. I would make one sided family trees when we had to make them from health classes. Now that I am 32 and settled and have a very blessed life the only that is missing is me not knowing the other half that makes up who I am. My research uncovered that I have at least two other sibilings and it would be nice to meet them since I did not bond with my stepfather or my half brother that came from that marriage.

Thanks to all again for listening and for the support. I will let you all know how it turns out.

If anyone has any advice I am open please share your experiances good and bad.

 

[JohnTBap]

I hope that everything works out so that you can find peace in your heart.

 

[Tiffany]

Originally posted by JohnTBap
I hope that everything works out so that you can find peace in your heart.

Thanks for the good wishes JohnTBap.

 

[kdibattista]

We have been going through ALOT of crap with his mom and stepfather. He finally decided to find out for himself what really happened 30 years ago. He found an address via US Search and Fedex'd a letter. His dad called right away. He lives about 2 hours away and everything has turned out wonderfully. They call each other several times a week and visit at least once a month. This will be our first Thanksgiving with them and we can't wait. I wish you the best and hope everything works out just the way you want it to.

 

[Poohbear123]

Best of Luck to you and the outcome of this. My 2 kids real father deserted them at the age of 2 and 3. Its a long story, but he has NOT been in thier Lives since than and they are 21 and 20 now. I have NO idea where to begin looking for him, nor do I want too, myself, as he is/was NOT a nice person. If my DD wants to look him up, more power to her, but my DS knows his Step-Dad as DAD!

 

[Kitty 34]

Good luck to you. I sure hope everything works out for you!

 

[snowball22]

I have a half brother and sister that I have never met. I never knew about them until a family friend let it slip when I was 18 that my father had been married twice before and had a son with the first wife and a daughter with the second. I would like to find them and meet them but I am quite scared about the whole situation. Good luck and let us know how it turns out.

 

[Tiffany]

Originally posted by kdibattista
We have been going through ALOT of crap with his mom and stepfather. He finally decided to find out for himself what really happened 30 years ago. He found an address via US Search and Fedex'd a letter. His dad called right away. He lives about 2 hours away and everything has turned out wonderfully. They call each other several times a week and visit at least once a month. This will be our first Thanksgiving with them and we can't wait. I wish you the best and hope everything works out just the way you want it to.

Hi kdibattista,

I used US Search also to get his address, phone number and some other info. It looks like he is currently married and has another child that is about 22yrs old. I know that my biological father also fathered another child a boy in 1969 so it looks like I have and older brother and a younger brother. My mother is 99.9% sure that the man I am sending the letter to is my biological father. I am gald everything worked out well for your husband.