Unhelpful Replies

[Big Kid]

There is a trend on the DISboards that is bothering me of late. It is replies to posts that are unhelpful, unkind, and/or judgemental.

I see examples that fall into these general categories:

1) Your question is beneath me / you should know the answer / the information that you are requesting is easily available if you were not too lazy and/or stupid to look it up.
1a) People ask that question all the time so you ought to search the forums rather than ask it again.

2) You asked a question that implies a choice that you have made. I disagree with your choice so I will disregard your question and debate you about your choice. For example, a question about travel time from Resort A to Park B via bus or rental car receives responses that the OP is out of his or her mind for either taking the bus or renting a car (and usually both in the same thread).

3) People who are not like me are ruining Walt Disney World for the rest of us (who are more deserving of having WDW be our way).

4) Though I have never met you, I can tell from your fifty-word post that you are a bad person and deserve the misfortune which you are complaining about.

5) It makes me feel superior when people who do not plan as thoroughly as some of us fanatics miss out on some of the magic. I will not share what I know so as to hoard all of the pixie dust for myself and the people who will appear in my scrapbook.

I respectfully request that my fellow posters give some thought to the effect that your words may have on the people who read them, and refrain from responding negatively to sincere questions. Please take into consideration that the person asking the question which annoys you:

may not have been to WDW before,
may not have enough time to plan every detail of his or her trip,
may not be a student of WDW,
may have different preferences than you do,
and almost surely has different life experiences, resources, and expectations than you do.

I do not, of course, suggest that we cannot disagree with each other or express our own opinions; this is the internet after all. But I would really appreciate it if folks would start their own threads to do so. If my post annoys you, for example, please consider starting your own thread about naieve people who dream on that the DISboards are all about sharing our enjoyment of the happiest place on earth.

Please and thank you.

 

[Piglet843]

So pretty much everything on DisBoards ...

 

[DrCavin]

You forgot to add If you dont have 1000+ posts you should be ignored... oh wait you dont have a 1000+ so I guess I should ignore you...

 

[foolishmortal]

so have you ever visted other message boards? they are all basically the same.

 

[jksgrammy]

so have you ever visted other message boards? they are all basically the same.

Unfortunately, I have to agree with above poster.

 

[Piglet843]

There is a trend on the DISboards that is bothering me of late. It is replies to posts that are unhelpful, unkind, and/or judgemental.

I see examples that fall into these general categories:

1) Your question is beneath me / you should know the answer / the information that you are requesting is easily available if you were not too lazy and/or stupid to look it up.
1a) People ask that question all the time so you ought to search the forums rather than ask it again.

2) You asked a question that implies a choice that you have made. I disagree with your choice so I will disregard your question and debate you about your choice. For example, a question about travel time from Resort A to Park B via bus or rental car receives responses that the OP is out of his or her mind for either taking the bus or renting a car (and usually both in the same thread).

3) People who are not like me are ruining Walt Disney World for the rest of us (who are more deserving of having WDW be our way).

4) Though I have never met you, I can tell from your fifty-word post that you are a bad person and deserve the misfortune which you are complaining about.

5) It makes me feel superior when people who do not plan as thoroughly as some of us fanatics miss out on some of the magic. I will not share what I know so as to hoard all of the pixie dust for myself and the people who will appear in my scrapbook.

I respectfully request that my fellow posters give some thought to the effect that your words may have on the people who read them, and refrain from responding negatively to sincere questions. Please take into consideration that the person asking the question which annoys you:

may not have been to WDW before,
may not have enough time to plan every detail of his or her trip,
may not be a student of WDW,
may have different preferences than you do,
and almost surely has different life experiences, resources, and expectations than you do.

I do not, of course, suggest that we cannot disagree with each other or express our own opinions; this is the internet after all. But I would really appreciate it if folks would start their own threads to do so. If my post annoys you, for example, please consider starting your own thread about naieve people who dream on that the DISboards are all about sharing our enjoyment of the happiest place on earth.

Please and thank you.

Oops - almost forgot the rule...
Personally I think it would be a pretty boring message board sometimes if not one single thread or reply contained any of the above...
And I can honestly say that because I've been a victim of at least one or two of those...

 

[pilesoflaundry]

How Many Forum Members Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?

1 to change the light bulb then post about it
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could've been changed differently
1 to move it to the Lighting folder
2 to argue and then move it to the Electrical folder
7 to point out grammar/spelling errors in post about changing light bulbs
5 to flame the spell checkers
3 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue whether it's a light bulb or lightbulb
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is Lamp
15 "know it alls" who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb is perfectly correct
19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take the discussion to the lightbulb forum
11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
36 to discuss the dangers of changing light bulbs without a professional opinion
5 to post a disclaimer that they are not light bulb experts, nor do they play one on TV and that anyone planning on changing their own light bulb should consult a professional
7 to post URLs where one can see examples of different light bulbs
4 to post that the URLs were posted incorrectly and then to post the correct URLs
3 to post about links they found from the URLs that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add, "Me too."
5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
4 to say, "Didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
13 to say, "Do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs."
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again

This will apply to just about every single message board. So does most of what you are saying. They are all the same, it's not just a trend and it's not just the disboard.



And I think I just contributed to it too

 

[MIGrandma]

While I know how things go around here, I do understand where the OP is coming from. There was one thread recently where the OP stated something that annoyed her, and she was just wondering if it annoyed others as well. Most people were nice in their answers, and even with opposing views they were nice about it. But some were downright rude and nasty, like they felt that their opinion was the only one worth anything. I think it's fine for people to disagree, and of course there are going to be many views on any certain subject. But to be rude and/or nasty to the OP simply for their opinion, just not right IMHO.

 

[LilyWDW]

so have you ever visted other message boards? they are all basically the same.

Heck, I would go as far to say, have you ever visited anywhere else on the internet...

The rule about message boards is this... if you don't want people to disagree with you or you don't want people to discuss things within your post, then don't post. Any information given on a message board is free game. Expect answers and opinions, even those that don't match what you want to hear.

Also, I don't think it is too much to ask that people read stickies or at least TRY search. I know the search feature on most message boards are just horrible, but that is still no reason not to use the stickies.

 

[Bonnie40]

Heck, I would go as far to say, have you ever visited anywhere else on the internet...

The rule about message boards is this... if you don't want people to disagree with you or you don't want people to discuss things within your post, then don't post. Any information given on a message board is free game. Expect answers and opinions, even those that don't match what you want to hear.

Also, I don't think it is too much to ask that people read stickies or at least TRY search. I know the search feature on most message boards are just horrible, but that is still no reason not to use the stickies.

Couldn't have said it better myself!

 

[Magic Mom]

Heck, I would go as far to say, have you ever visited anywhere else on the internet...

The rule about message boards is this... if you don't want people to disagree with you or you don't want people to discuss things within your post, then don't post. Any information given on a message board is free game. Expect answers and opinions, even those that don't match what you want to hear.

Also, I don't think it is too much to ask that people read stickies or at least TRY search. I know the search feature on most message boards are just horrible, but that is still no reason not to use the stickies.

Per the OP, you should have started a new thread to mention this.

 

[Guy Incognito]

There is a trend on the DISboards that is bothering me of late. It is replies to posts that are unhelpful, unkind, and/or judgemental.

I see examples that fall into these general categories:

1) Your question is beneath me / you should know the answer / the information that you are requesting is easily available if you were not too lazy and/or stupid to look it up.
1a) People ask that question all the time so you ought to search the forums rather than ask it again.

too often, that's actually an accurate description.... when someone posts a thread asking "what is (insert food/beverege/item)?", my first thought is: It would take you 10 seconds to enter that into a google search and find out what it is right away.... (I don't bother posting on it, 'cause I'd just attract whiners calling me 'mean and nasty' or the like )


now, if they want to spark a conversation about that item, phrase the question differently (maybe "what do you think of [xxx]?"), but if you just want to know what something is, it's a lot quicker to do a search yourself on the net.

 

[bicker]

I see examples that fall into these general categories:

1) Your question is beneath me / you should know the answer / the information that you are requesting is easily available if you were not too lazy and/or stupid to look it up.
1a) People ask that question all the time so you ought to search the forums rather than ask it again.

I agree with the other posters who said that it is not unreasonable to expect folks to read FAQs and use the Search (especially after all the hassle we went through to get a working Search feature for the DIS). However, the proper response to someone not reading the FAQ and not Searching is either (1) Ignore the question [a perfectly valid response, under the circumstances - being helpful is two-way street - the person asking for help has to do their part, in order for helpers to be obligated to help]; or (2) quote the FAQ, and/or post the Search Results yourself. I tend to do #2. As a matter of fact, that's kind-of what I did in the second half of this message: http://www.disboards.com/showpost.php?p=37708164&postcount=7

2) You asked a question that implies a choice that you have made. I disagree with your choice so I will disregard your question and debate you about your choice. For example, a question about travel time from Resort A to Park B via bus or rental car receives responses that the OP is out of his or her mind for either taking the bus or renting a car (and usually both in the same thread).

I get this all the time. On every forum online. About every topic. I've tried myriad different approaches, including but not limited to clearly listing specific aspects of the inquiry as immutable, to no avail.

Note that this scenario is similar to, but rather different in context to, the scenario where someone is looking for ratification of a bad choice. "Please help me defend in my own mind something that I want to be the right answer, even if it is the wrong answer." Doing that is not being helpful. In that scenario, being helpful is helping that person understand that they are essentially looking to delude themselves. It is important that they recognize the fact that by making a certain choice they're taking on the risk, or the inevitability, of a more negative result than if they made a different choice.

3) People who are not like me are ruining Walt Disney World for the rest of us (who are more deserving of having WDW be our way).

This one intrigues me. I'm not quite sure I know what you're referring to.

4) Though I have never met you, I can tell from your fifty-word post that you are a bad person and deserve the misfortune which you are complaining about.

This is bad, but to be fair, it doesn't really happen much.

5) It makes me feel superior when people who do not plan as thoroughly as some of us fanatics miss out on some of the magic. I will not share what I know so as to hoard all of the pixie dust for myself and the people who will appear in my scrapbook.

Again, this doesn't really happen much as far as I can tell. I can't remember a thread like this actually.

Please take into consideration that the person asking the question which annoys you:

...

may have different preferences than you do,
and almost surely has different life experiences, resources, and expectations than you do.

I highlighted these because they apply generally, to everything in life. People should really take your implied advice, outlined here, to heart.

 

[lovesmurfs]

(I don't bother posting on it, 'cause I'd just attract whiners calling me 'mean and nasty' or the like )

Yep. I'd love to use "Let me google that for you" (www.lmgtfy.com), but it really comes off snarkily.

I guess this isn't a particularly helpful reply....

 

[cpbjgc]

It is wrong for Big Kid to point out a perceived lack of civility on the DISboards because:

• Of course no on is civil to one another - it's the internet!
• Other message boards are as bad or worse - so of course we don't have to be civil to one another!

And we would all jump off the bridge because our friend did

The one the OP missed that is my favourite is the use of the smilie. Apparently when you flame another poster for 3 paragraphs, it's all OK and we are all friends because you put the at the end. Where did that come from .

Oh, wait, less than a 1,000 posts - nevermind, I spoke out of turn.

 

[bicker]

The rule about message boards is this... if you don't want people to disagree with you or you don't want people to discuss things within your post, then don't post. Any information given on a message board is free game. Expect answers and opinions, even those that don't match what you want to hear.

This should be a sticky on every forum.

It actually should go further, perhaps: It benefits everyone if for every topic where there is any significant different of opinion, for all sides of the topic to be discussed equally (not even "proportionally", because that biases the discussion toward the most popular perspective, which often serves only to propagate the status quo and preclude innovation, progress, and advancement of understanding).

 

[FoxberryJam]

Everytime someone posts a legit complaint about rude, nasty, etc. replies to an OP (usually by people with 800,000 posts), even though the OP clearly states they have no problem with a respectful discussion of differing opinions, disagreements, etc., people always seem to respond along the lines of "if you don't want people disagreeing with you, or offering differing opinions, dont post". Did the OP not clearly state that they have no problem with people disagreeing with them and offering differing opinions??

 

[bumbershoot]

Yep. I'd love to use "Let me google that for you" (www.lmgtfy.com), but it really comes off snarkily.

I guess this isn't a particularly helpful reply....

I adore it when I see people use that online. I'm not brave enough to, but I admire those who do it.

1) Your question is beneath me / you should know the answer / the information that you are requesting is easily available if you were not too lazy and/or stupid to look it up.
1a) People ask that question all the time so you ought to search the forums rather than ask it again.

I'm sure I've missed some examples, but I only remember seeing that sort of response either after *someone else* has already answered the question (so the OP has their reply and now they have information on how to find things in the future), or after the person saying the above has already answered the question.

Either way, I only ever remember seeing that in conjunction with the actual answer.

When I worked CS at amazon, I would tell them how I'd help them, what happened, how to not encounter the problem in the future (if applicable), and what I had done for them (if something was warranted). The education was absolutely key. Because if we didn't help them learn how to do things in the future, then they'd just run into the same problem in the future! And that's not fun.

Some people liked that. Others didn't. But at least we were giving the education on how to use the site better, and maybe, just maybe, the customer would remember it the next time, and perhaps thank us in their heads. (like the lady that bought a big ride-on vehicle for her son's birthday a few days before his b'day, was lucky enough that it got on a UPS truck when it was supposed to be sent by specialty shipper, and then complained to US that it was going to be late for his b'day, without EVER once looking outside to notice the *ice storm* that had delayed the UPS driver in her upstate NY town...the next year, I bet she ordered earlier, even if she didn't use amazon...I only hope if she did the same thing in the future, she didn't put her 4 year old son on the phone with that CS rep, like she did with me, b/c not everyone would have been as kind as I was to him)

Anyway, how are you going to survive on the Dis if you don't know how to search for answers, even if by doing a control F to search on the page, or just use google. ("disboards" and the keyword on google is a LOVELY way to find posts!)

 

[Carly_Roach]

Who died and made the OP King?

sigh. I miss everything.

 

[MELSMICE]

Wasn't there a thread similar to this a few weeks ago about people being nicer on the boards.

I agree that some posters are always snarky & rude, but this is a message board............brush it off & move on. Ignore those posts that you don't want to read. I've had more than one poster post on threads I started that I found rude & nasty. Maybe it's because I've been on here for quite a few years that I just roll my eyes, laugh & look for useful information instead of getting upset about the rudeness.

This is probably going to come off as rude too, but sometimes it feels like we're on a playground where Sally tattles because Susie isn't being nice to her.