Ughhhhhhh!!!!!

[TammyAlphabet]

I have three trips planned. One family trip to VB, one extended family to HH for Turkey Day, and a spring break 06, with my DS and DD and myself to WDW. Okay, my best friend, whom i love, and have known for over 20 years, but doesn't have the means that I have, knows about the vero trip. I told her about the Family Hilton Head trip this morning and her reaction was such a downer...She said, "That is nice for you" with the emphasis on the you. Like, she is disappointed that I am not taking her. I don't have room in the car for her and her DS and even if I did, my mom and brother, who are going, wouldn't go if they thought she was going. (She is a bit like "Debby Downer" from SNL) So, now, I have to keep quiet about it around her so she won't be upset. Isn't that silly?

Am I rubbing it in her face so to speak because I am excited about my upcoming trips or is she being a big baby?

Do any of you have to keep your friends at arms length about your travel plans??? How do you handle "friends" like this?

 

[Laurabearz]

I sometime feel uncomfortable talking about all the trips we have planned here on the DIS....

I try not to talk about them to our friends and family, unless they bring it up... even then I only talk about the soon to come trips, not all the trips that are booked. LOL

 

[kathleena]

Isn't that silly?

Am I rubbing it in her face so to speak because I am excited about my upcoming trips or is she being a big baby?

Do any of you have to keep your friends at arms length about your travel plans??? How do you handle "friends" like this?

Yes, Yes so to speak, Yes but if she's a downer like you say then she probably is just that way and Yes.

As for the last question, how I handle it is to not talk about it. Some friends are friends in some parts of my life and not others and I keep them separate. If she can't be a friend in support of your life - your whole life - then there are parts that you should keep separate.

Well, just my opinion anyway. That's how I see it.

 

[SueOKW]

My best friend would be happy for me - means or no.

But with my regular friends, and people I work with - I don't talk about my trips much... it makes us appear like we must have so much liquidity that we are rolling in dough.

 

[dianeschlicht]

If she is a "best" friend, she wouldn't feel entitled to be invited along. None of my even "good" friends expect that, and my best friend never feels that way. That's why I occationaly invite her along! Most reasonable people would understand the difference between a family trip and a trip with friends.

Being excited about your trip is one thing, but you probably shouldn't mention it to her again. If this is someone you intend to take sometime in the future, you might want to ask her when she might be available in ???? (year) to join you. It might keep her from pouting too much and making you miserable.

 

[lizziepooh]

She may be sensitive to the fact that she doesn't have the money for a trip and may never have it depending on her circumstances. I think sometimes you have to be aware of what you say and how others may be feeling.

I have been in conversations where one gal went on and on about her daughter who got all As, was in Honor Society, band, homecoming queen, football star boyfriend, etc. etc. Another gal in the group had been having so many problems with her daughter (attention deficit, trouble in school, drugs, etc.). While I was certainly happy for the one gal, I felt she was a little insensitive to the situation the other gal was going thru at that time.

 

[spiceycat]

you might try my way - I offer up a DVC trip - 5 nights OKW studio. it will run you around 40 to 55 points. (no easter or christmas time).

don't go with her - just let her take her daughter - she pays for the WDW tickets, her transportation to get there, and her meals.

I love my family and friends - but when we vacation together it doesn't always work.

this Sept - me and mother are going to be in a different resort from my brother and his family - this was done on purpose...

 

[TammyAlphabet]

Thanks for the replies. I could and would offer her the some points for a trip but she couldn't afford to go even then. It is that bad. After I get a better job, I will gladly treat her to a trip. But, until then.....

 

[penguin77]

My wife, two freinds, and I will be there wt the end of May. When one of our other friends heard we were going a couple months ago she acted as if we were moving away permanatly. She even went as far as saying that she wasn't evaen happy for us. "Whatever" I could'nt deal with that as she is a self admitted prude that goes to bed early, hattes to walk, does not like to eat out, and the craziest thing ever she is truly deathly afraid of people in costumes. She breaks down crying at the sight of the easter bunny yet she is mad because we did not invite her to Disney. Oh yeah, and she will be returning from her honeymoon the day AFTER we intend to leave. In short I feal for ya.

 

[spiceycat]

It doesn't matter that she can't go - if you offer her the trip she will think how generous you are instead of how selfish you are....

hey it works for me.

 

[JerJan]

YOUR KIDDING RIGHT???? YOUR "BEST FRIEND?" If she was truly your best friend she would be happy for you and not be a crybaby, sounds like she needs to grow up and you need a new "best friend"! You don't "OWE" her anything...and she shouldn't try to make you feel like "crap" for owning and using your DVC. Just my honest opinion....... you asked.

 

[isyt]

Oh boy, I truely understand. My sisteris divorced fo about a year and we took her and her daughter to Disney last November (she paid for some). She doesn't want to go to Disney by herself and her dd so when I told her of our October trip she wants to come again . The problem is she can't afford it. We are at Boardwalk and don't have any more points to change res so I offered to make a res at Pop but she wants to stay at the same hotel. My DH doesn't want her to come at all. So now I stopped bringing it up maybe everyone will forget.

 

[dianeschlicht]

Oh boy, I truely understand. My sisteris divorced fo about a year and we took her and her daughter to Disney last November (she paid for some). She doesn't want to go to Disney by herself and her dd so when I told her of our October trip she wants to come again . The problem is she can't afford it. We are at Boardwalk and don't have any more points to change res so I offered to make a res at Pop but she wants to stay at the same hotel. My DH doesn't want her to come at all. So now I stopped bringing it up maybe everyone will forget.

Now THIS situation is simple. She can't afford it even if she doesn't have to pay accommodations, so she is out of luck. We have a very dear friend who would never be able to afford Disney either. Same situation, divorce and a son. We have treated her to accommodations twice, but each time, she scrimped and saved and paid her own transportation and tickets. We provided meals at the villa and one meal out for the two of them. They were VERY appreciative, and they would never invite themselves along.

 

[SueOKW]

Penguin - - amazing story - unbelievable, but I believe it. some people....

Don't talk about vacations to anyone - ever.. that's my motto. (The tan is hard to explain when I get back though.)