U.S. DISRUPTS AL QAEDA NETWORKS FALL TV SEASON
Raid in Karachi Yields Cache of Sitcoms, Dramas
A successful raid by U.S. forces in Karachi, Pakistan has completely disrupted the al Qaeda networks fall TV schedule, the Pentagon revealed today.
The U.S. seized a cache of sitcoms, dramas and a game show hosted by Osama bin Laden that many al Qaeda insiders had hoped would be the surprise hit of the 2002-3 television season.
Speaking in Washington, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld said that the international terror group had been planning to launch a fall TV schedule full of pro-terror entertainment programming in the hopes of toppling NBC from the top spot in this years Nielsen race.
Given the number of well-crafted dramas and sitcoms we seized in the raid, there is little doubt that al Qaeda was planning to aggressively counter-program NBCs highly successful Must See TV lineup, Secretary Rumsfeld said.
But Rumsfeld indicated that in the aftermath of the successful U.S. raid, the al Qaeda network was likely to finish near the bottom of the ratings heap, just slightly ahead of UPN.
One of the sitcoms seized in the raid, Everybody Loves the Shoe-bomber, features would-be al Qaeda shoe-bomber Richard Reid as a middle-aged shoe-bomber named Dick Reid, trying to juggle his job as a shoe-bomber while raising three teenage daughters with raging hormones.
While some Hollywood TV insiders called the shoe-bomber sitcom promising, they were less impressed by the Osama-hosted game show, Who Wants to Be A Militant?
We showed the Osama program to a focus group in San Diego, said Alison Cregan, a programming executive for CBS. At the end of the day, they didnt find bin Laden very likeable.
**** READ THE BOROWITZ REPORT IN YOUR NEWSPAPER ****
Raid in Karachi Yields Cache of Sitcoms, Dramas
A successful raid by U.S. forces in Karachi, Pakistan has completely disrupted the al Qaeda networks fall TV schedule, the Pentagon revealed today.
The U.S. seized a cache of sitcoms, dramas and a game show hosted by Osama bin Laden that many al Qaeda insiders had hoped would be the surprise hit of the 2002-3 television season.
Speaking in Washington, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld said that the international terror group had been planning to launch a fall TV schedule full of pro-terror entertainment programming in the hopes of toppling NBC from the top spot in this years Nielsen race.
Given the number of well-crafted dramas and sitcoms we seized in the raid, there is little doubt that al Qaeda was planning to aggressively counter-program NBCs highly successful Must See TV lineup, Secretary Rumsfeld said.
But Rumsfeld indicated that in the aftermath of the successful U.S. raid, the al Qaeda network was likely to finish near the bottom of the ratings heap, just slightly ahead of UPN.
One of the sitcoms seized in the raid, Everybody Loves the Shoe-bomber, features would-be al Qaeda shoe-bomber Richard Reid as a middle-aged shoe-bomber named Dick Reid, trying to juggle his job as a shoe-bomber while raising three teenage daughters with raging hormones.
While some Hollywood TV insiders called the shoe-bomber sitcom promising, they were less impressed by the Osama-hosted game show, Who Wants to Be A Militant?
We showed the Osama program to a focus group in San Diego, said Alison Cregan, a programming executive for CBS. At the end of the day, they didnt find bin Laden very likeable.
**** READ THE BOROWITZ REPORT IN YOUR NEWSPAPER ****
