Tyler Perry's story of abuse

[MizTink]

http://www.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/Movies/10/06/tyler.perry.abused/index.html

i'm so glad more people are publicly speaking of childhood physical and sexual abuse. especially from a man. women talk about it much more than boys/men. i believe that more people can stop the cycle and heal the abused children if more people are educated.
it happens. A LOT. and to boys as well as girls. IT NEEDS TO STOP, and we can't stop it if the victims are too afraid or too ashamed to talk about it.

thank you Tyler Perry (as well as Oprah and all the others who have spoken up)

 

[Let'sGoFlyAKite]

http://www.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/Movies/10/06/tyler.perry.abused/index.html

i'm so glad more people are publicly speaking of childhood physical and sexual abuse. especially from a man. women talk about it much more than boys/men. i believe that more people can stop the cycle and heal the abused children if more people are educated.
it happens. A LOT. and to boys as well as girls. IT NEEDS TO STOP, and we can't stop it if the victims are too afraid or too ashamed to talk about it.

thank you Tyler Perry (as well as Oprah and all the others who have spoken up)

I watched the one yesterday with the 200 guys that have been abused. I literally bawled OUT LOUD. It's brought up a lot about what happened to me (when I was 12) and I have finally addressed the issue because this has made me feel empowered....even though I'm a woman, hearing Oprah say to those men "It's NOT your fault. It was NEVER your fault" was SO COMFORTING. It's like even though I didnt get any support from my mother when I told her, I got the support I needed from that show and I'm really leaning on my husband more than ever and he's really helping me to cope with it. Wish more people would be willing to speak up.

 

[minkydog]

As sad as his story is, I can't help but think of the millions of little girls who are enduring sexual abuse. When 200 guys or even just one guy who happens to be famous admits that he was a victim it touches hearts. However,girls are more than twice as likely to be victims. In fact, 1 out of 4 girls experience sexual abuse before the age of 18. Look around you--how many friends do you have. Do the math. One out of FOUR. Where is the outrage and indignation for them? Don't get me wrong, I am very very empathetic toward Tyler Perry. I would say I can't imagine his pain, but unfortunately, I can. I just wish someone had had the guts to stand up for me. I wish someone had stood up for my little sister and all the girls out there who silently endure degradation at the hands of adults who should be taking care of them.

Sadly, I have not been able to talk to my own mother about this. But in her way, she victimized me as much as my abusers. She knew and she did nothing. Well, not nothing. She beat me within an inch of my life for "being bad." I was frigging 10 years old. And because I was taken advantage of on a regular basis by someone I loved I learned to have no boundaries. When the next guy and the next came along who did the same thing, well, I didn't know how to fight back. It seemed to be something that we girls just have to endure, like a rite of passage. As an adult I've had to learn to set those boundaries. I've had to learn appropriate ways to give and receive love. About a year ago I was finally able to understand that the things that were done to me were illegal. Imagine that.

I'm glad Tyler Perry is speaking up. Perhaps his story will reach those people who can help boys AND girls. Perhaps they'll speak for the silent ones and prosecute the offenders. It's time for children to be seen AND heard.

Off my soapbox now.

 

[nmmom95]

Minky & Let'sGo...

I will never understand how someone could hurt a child. I admire your strength.

 

[cm8]

As sad as his story is, I can't help but think of the millions of little girls who are enduring sexual abuse. When 200 guys or even just one guy who happens to be famous admits that he was a victim it touches hearts. However,girls are more than twice as likely to be victims. In fact, 1 out of 4 girls experience sexual abuse before the age of 18. Look around you--how many friends do you have. Do the math. One out of FOUR. Where is the outrage and indignation for them? Don't get me wrong, I am very very empathetic toward Tyler Perry. I would say I can't imagine his pain, but unfortunately, I can. I just wish someone had had the guts to stand up for me. I wish someone had stood up for my little sister and all the girls out there who silently endure degradation at the hands of adults who should be taking care of them.

Sadly, I have not been able to talk to my own mother about this. But in her way, she victimized me as much as my abusers. She knew and she did nothing. Well, not nothing. She beat me within an inch of my life for "being bad." I was frigging 10 years old. And because I was taken advantage of on a regular basis by someone I loved I learned to have no boundaries. When the next guy and the next came along who did the same thing, well, I didn't know how to fight back. It seemed to be something that we girls just have to endure, like a rite of passage. As an adult I've had to learn to set those boundaries. I've had to learn appropriate ways to give and receive love. About a year ago I was finally able to understand that the things that were done to me were illegal. Imagine that.

I'm glad Tyler Perry is speaking up. Perhaps his story will reach those people who can help boys AND girls. Perhaps they'll speak for the silent ones and prosecute the offenders. It's time for children to be seen AND heard.

Off my soapbox now.

, abuse is never easy to deal with, and it seems to always stay with you no matter what

 

[Robindianne]

As sad as his story is, I can't help but think of the millions of little girls who are enduring sexual abuse. When 200 guys or even just one guy who happens to be famous admits that he was a victim it touches hearts. However,girls are more than twice as likely to be victims. In fact, 1 out of 4 girls experience sexual abuse before the age of 18. Look around you--how many friends do you have. Do the math. One out of FOUR. Where is the outrage and indignation for them? Don't get me wrong, I am very very empathetic toward Tyler Perry. I would say I can't imagine his pain, but unfortunately, I can. I just wish someone had had the guts to stand up for me. I wish someone had stood up for my little sister and all the girls out there who silently endure degradation at the hands of adults who should be taking care of them.
.

Ditto 3 of 4 girls (3 of 5 sibs) in my immed fam. Too too common

 

[WebmasterMaryJo]

I think what makes it so hard is the sense of betrayal that comes from sexual abuse from those who are supposed to be watching out for us.

 

[Let'sGoFlyAKite]

Minky, just so you know...I felt that the Oprah show DID speak up for BOTH sexes. Although they were just speaking to men that day, Oprah has spoken about this subject with women on other shows, and honestly, it really does help, to hear ANYONE tell you "I'm sorry that this happened to you" (even though our mom's have not said it) When someone says "It's NOT your fault"!! It's comforting to hear, if we take those words as being spoken to US. (even though our moms SHOULD have) So when Oprah said it, I just started crying like a baby, and it finally got through my head. I have felt MUCH better since then. I feel like I can leave this ugly chapter of my life BEHIND me now. So for you, Minky:
'IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT' "YOU WERE AN INNOCENT HELPLESS CHILD"
"I'M SO SORRY THAT THIS HAPPENED TO YOU"

 

[Snoopymom]

Years ago Oprah had a therapist on. I can't remember the exact details but she had an exercise to do to help victims.

You close your eyes and imagine yourself as a child, take your time, imagine what you look like, what you are wearing, how you're wearing your hair, standing in front of your home you grew up in or sitting in your favorite chair, as many details as you can remember...

and then you give that child a hug, tell her that everything will be ok, tell her it's not her fault, do everything you wished your mom or someone who should have been protecting you should have done.

I remember that Oprah and everyone got extremely emotional, it seemed very break through like, and really helpful.

They used to interview Tyler Perry on a local radio station here and I thought he was such a great guy before I even knew who he was and what he's been through.

Hugs!

 

[Let'sGoFlyAKite]

Years ago Oprah had a therapist on. I can't remember the exact details but she had an exercise to do to help victims.

You close your eyes and imagine yourself as a child, take your time, imagine what you look like, what you are wearing, how you're wearing your hair, standing in front of your home you grew up in or sitting in your favorite chair, as many details as you can remember...

and then you give that child a hug, tell her that everything will be ok, tell her it's not her fault, do everything you wished your mom or someone who should have been protecting you should have done.

I remember that Oprah and everyone got extremely emotional, it seemed very break through like, and really helpful.

They used to interview Tyler Perry on a local radio station here and I thought he was such a great guy before I even knew who he was and what he's been through.

Hugs!

wow. thats powerful

 

[minkydog]

Minky, just so you know...I felt that the Oprah show DID speak up for BOTH sexes. Although they were just speaking to men that day, Oprah has spoken about this subject with women on other shows, and honestly, it really does help, to hear ANYONE tell you "I'm sorry that this happened to you" (even though our mom's have not said it) When someone says "It's NOT your fault"!! It's comforting to hear, if we take those words as being spoken to US. (even though our moms SHOULD have) So when Oprah said it, I just started crying like a baby, and it finally got through my head. I have felt MUCH better since then. I feel like I can leave this ugly chapter of my life BEHIND me now. So for you, Minky:
'IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT' "YOU WERE AN INNOCENT HELPLESS CHILD"
"I'M SO SORRY THAT THIS HAPPENED TO YOU"

Thank you very much for that. I'm 54 years old and I'm just now finally getting to a place where I can understand and process this stuff.

Years ago Oprah had a therapist on. I can't remember the exact details but she had an exercise to do to help victims.

You close your eyes and imagine yourself as a child, take your time, imagine what you look like, what you are wearing, how you're wearing your hair, standing in front of your home you grew up in or sitting in your favorite chair, as many details as you can remember...

and then you give that child a hug, tell her that everything will be ok, tell her it's not her fault, do everything you wished your mom or someone who should have been protecting you should have done.

I remember that Oprah and everyone got extremely emotional, it seemed very break through like, and really helpful.

They used to interview Tyler Perry on a local radio station here and I thought he was such a great guy before I even knew who he was and what he's been through.

Hugs!

Thank you for this suggestion. It's hard to do and very emotional work. I think if you do it over and over again,perhaps at some point you can start to actually *hear* yourself and believe it. It's a process--baby steps.