We go back to the room and change into swimming attire. Shall I post another picture? Anybody want to judge a swimsuit contest? Right. I didn't think so.
The OKW pool has a neat little winding slide. My kids would have loved to go down it again and again and again. I'm relaxing in my own lil world, just kinda floating around lazily in the middle of the pool. I'm minding my own biznezz, when RS comes up behind me and says "Watch out. You're about to get splashed!"
Before I can say
, I find myself drowning in a avalanche of water. In my lazy, floating down the river mode, I never realized that a man of generous proportions was gleefully making his way down the slide and I was in his direct line of splashing.
After some coughing and sputtering, RonStoppable suggests that we take a turn on the slide.
I will try to give you a visual. It enhances the TR experience, I'm told. Sorry, that's the best I could come up with.
"You go first. I'll hold down the fort here."
So, Rs climbs the steps and gets in line with all the little kiddos and sure enough I see him splashing into the water with a childlike grin on his face.
I'm tempted, but not convinced that a lady of my gentile nature should attempt such a feat, but after much
(2.3 seconds) coaxing, I was convinced this would be a WONDERFUL idea.
RS asks me if I want him to go with me. "Good Lord, NO! You have to clear the waters and grab my bathing suit top, in case of a wardrobe malfunction!"
Sheesh, I thought that would have been a given, but you know how men are.
Just as I was about to climb out of the pool, I looked back, but RS urged me forward.
"Go. Getouttahere."
Go, I did. Up the stairs without any child to accompany me. The only adult up there without a kid. Some little guy in front of me gives me the once over and says "Is it your first time?"
"Yes" I try not to giggle "Any tips?"
"Lay back and cross your arms. And hold your breath on the way down."
"I guess you've been down this slide a few times."
"I've been down it all week. Piece of cake. Dont be scared" he advises.
"I'll do my best." I say.
Slowly the line continues forward and finally it's my turn. I sit down, but then I remember the advice of my slide riding instructor, so I push myself forward and then lie down, cross my arms, and hold my breath.
Heyyyy, this is kinda fun. I feel like a kid again. I'm nearing the end. I think hitting the water is not going to be a problem. Except it is. I have no idea what happened. My legs went one way. My arms went another. I forgot to hold my breath and the next thing I know I was completely submerged under the water. I had no clue what was right side up or upside down. I grab my bathing suit top. If I die, at least it wont be flashing the crowd, I surmise. (Just call me Roxy?)
I feel two hands underneath my arms lifting me out of the water. I emerge and gasp for air. I hear laughter. AT ME? Are people watching? YES! I am still clinging to my bathing suit top and a good thing too, b/c somehow the string at the neck has come untied. Oh yes it did. No lie.

(I am very intuitive. I KNEW that was going to happen)
"Why are these people laughing at me?!?!" I demand of RS.
"Because it was cute. You weren't awkward or flying through the air or anything.

Besides they aren't laughing at you. They are laughing
with you!"
Except for one thing.
I aint laughing.
"Tie me up and get me outta here". That sentences sounds wrong, but it's a good thing, trust me.
"Do it one more time." RS urges "That one didn't count. It's like getting bucked off a horse. You have to get right back on, or you'll never do it again."
For some reason I feel like I have to prove to the rest of the OKW guests, that I can make a graceful landing at the end of the slide, so I give it one more shot.
Whilst at the top some guy in front of me says "That was quite a splash you made the last time"
I give him a sneer and mutter "Thanks"
Now I am so worried about how I'm going to "land" that I forget to enjoy the ride. There is a valuable life lesson in there, I'm quite sure. This time I do fare a tad better. It wasn't a total wipeout. Don't get me wrong, there was still a big splash, and I still went completely under while my bathing suit top was being guarded more closely than all the gold in Fort Knox, but when I emerged from the water (all by myself, tyverymuch) there was no laughter. One mom even said to me "You're braver than I am. I wouldnt have gone the first time, and then I REALLY wouldn't have gone the second time, especially since the first time was such a disaster"
Great. My first time was a disaster. I bet I'm now a story that people will share with their families for years to come. "Remember that lady at the OKW pool? Remember how disastrous she looked as she sailed off the slide? Remember how her husband had to pull her out of the water? Good thing she grabbed that top."