Troll's Trip Report

[Lil' Lisa]

.

 

[SCtigercock]

That always worked with my dad too...

 

[Tri-circle-D]

That always worked with my dad too...

Epic is good!

My DD's know this trick too.

And so does Mrs. TCD.

It works every time.

TCD

 

[SC DAD of 2]

I Wholeheartedly agree with TCD, that is the cutest baby

troll I've ever seen. However, I did see a baby Ogre one

time that was half as cute.

By the way, great trip report.

 

[takeme2epcot]

I Wholeheartedly agree with TCD, that is the cutest baby troll I've ever seen.

He is kinda cute, isn't he? Even if I say so myself?

To TCD: I will research the RC water tower issue. I just have no recollection of it...and it's not something I'd miss, even as a really young child.

Onward!

So as I mentioned last time, Mr. TCD, the man who created an Internet sensation -- that I actually I saw mentioned on major sites like MSN and CNN -- by photographing the slow decay of River Country, stopped by my site to say hello.

He and I talked a bit about RC and we even discussed his top secret method of infiltration...which will remain top secret.

I reminded him of our bet. You see, in another thread, he and I bet a beer -- to be shared at Crockett's Tavern -- that the new FW DVC will reuse much of River Country. He says no way, that the Disney bigwigs will never use much if anything of the original RC.

We shall see.

Anyway, while we were talking, we were both surprised at how small a world it is. Right we were in mid sentence, my site neighbors Chris and Barbara, whom I had met the previous day, pulled up in their golf cart. They said, "Oh, hi!" and I said hi back.

But they weren't talking to me -- they were talking to TCD!

Turns out that by sheer coincidence, TCD and the folks camping right next to me are old friends!

Later Barbara asked TCD, "Hey, how did you meet Norm?"

And TCD replied, "I met him online."

OK, for clarity, I don't ordinarily meet other dudes "online."

I wish TCD had said, "I met him on a message board."

"I met him online," is what women tell their girlfriends where they met the guy they met on Match.com.

Anyway, later that night, TCD's old friends Chris and Barbara invited Mrs. Troll and me to share their campfire and knock back a few beers, which we accepted. During our campfire powwow, I learned that Chris and Barbara were totally unaware of Mr. TCD's celebrity status here on Dis.

In retrospect, I wonder if TCD appreciates the fact that outed him?

Woops!

Anyway, since I had family visiting, TCD didn't stick around long. He made slight sideways mentions of a possible secret incursion that he might make this trip and then he was on his way.

As I mentioned last time, my great nephew troll Andrew was visiting us at the Fort for his very first time.

And as I also mentioned, baby trolls refer to horses as "hurrs."

And the baby troll wanted to go for a hurr ride.

So we all hopped on the cart and headed over to the TCD Ranch!

And now without further adieu...

Drumroll, please...

I bring you...

Baby Troll Andrew...

On his very first hurr ride!

At the Fort!

See the gentleman in the Hawaiian shirt in the back? This man is a god.

To me, anyway.

His is my oldest brother Lance.

As a kid growing up, I worshiped this man.

And I still do.

When I started this trip report, I mentioned how I hoped Pop's spirit was along with us for the ride.

If he was, imagine how he must have felt -- his two sons, his granddaughter, and his great grandson...

All together at the same time...

...enjoying the Fort that he loved and introduced to us.

Andrew loved his hurr ride:

And it was only $5!

Again, Mr. Disney is giving away the world!

Up next: I do some scouting of the eerie River Country area and I recount a story of tragedy striking when Pop & I go down Whoop 'n' Holler Hollow!

 

[graciejane]

I have to admit that I check every evening for new additions to the Troll Trip Report...it has become rather addicting. And baby Trolls are adorable. Can't wait to read more.

 

[TuckandStuiesMom]

Adorable lil baby troll on an adorable lil fuzzy hurr.

 

[kampfirekim]

I've never seen a more beautiful family of trolls.

Of course, I no longer consider you a troll. But I'll still have to keep it as a pet name. I hope you'll understand.

Love the TR and looking forward to your Pop stories about River Country.

 

[Tri-circle-D]

To TCD: I will research the RC water tower issue. I just have no recollection of it...and it's not something I'd miss, even as a really young child.

Onward!

So as I mentioned last time, Mr. TCD, the man who created an Internet sensation -- that I actually I saw mentioned on major sites like MSN and CNN -- by photographing the slow decay of River Country, stopped by my site to say hello.

He and I talked a bit about RC and we even discussed his top secret method of infiltration...which will remain top secret.

I reminded him of our bet. You see, in another thread, he and I bet a beer -- to be shared at Crockett's Tavern -- that the new FW DVC will reuse much of River Country. He says no way, that the Disney bigwigs will never use much if anything of the original RC.

We shall see.

Anyway, while we were talking, we were both surprised at how small a world it is. Right we were in mid sentence, my site neighbors Chris and Barbara, whom I had met the previous day, pulled up in their golf cart. They said, "Oh, hi!" and I said hi back.

But they weren't talking to me -- they were talking to TCD!

Turns out that by sheer coincidence, TCD and the folks camping right next to me are old friends!

Later Barbara asked TCD, "Hey, how did you meet Norm?"

And TCD replied, "I met him online."

OK, for clarity, I don't ordinarily meet other dudes "online."

I wish TCD had said, "I met him on a message board."

"I met him online," is what women tell their girlfriends where they met the guy they met on Match.com.

Anyway, later that night, TCD's old friends Chris and Barbara invited Mrs. Troll and me to share their campfire and knock back a few beers, which we accepted. During our campfire powwow, I learned that Chris and Barbara were totally unaware of Mr. TCD's celebrity status here on Dis.

In retrospect, I wonder if TCD appreciates the fact that outed him?

Woops!

1. Yes, we will revisit this River Country water tower issue at some point. If it existed early on, a photo of it will surface. Interestingly enough, I haven't found an old photo of it. Since it is kind of a landmark, you would think it would be in someone's old photos. We shall see.

2. I saw Barbara again later in the week, and she told me she couldn't wait to get home so she could start reading the Disboards. She is probably reading right along, so Hi Barbara! I have know Chris and Barbara a long time. We used to camp together with a group of families from our kids' school back in the day. Good times! It is, indeed, a small world that Norm would end up camping next to old friends of TCD!

3. A point of clarification: I have never infiltrated River Country or taken any photos during any such infiltration. Any photos I have posted of River Country were taken by others, or from over the fence. I always follow the rules.

4. That Baby Troll on the hurr is the cutest thing I have seen in a long time!

More please!

TCD

 

[storyteller]

Nice thing to say about your older brother, I have 3 older brothers.
by time I showed up, I had to take care myself, they still borrow money from me. They look up to me. I take care of them. However we have 3 DS and the two younger ones do very much look up to the oldest. If we had a 4th, that one would have been totally on his/her own.
And yes you're TR is very addictive. MORE PLEASE

 

[Specularius]

Fantastic TR. I am loving it. One point of contention though, this photo:

The circular indentions are not made from a band saw at all. These logs were cut with a circular saw blade. The teeth are set one to one side, the next to the other side and so on so that the turning circle of the blade cuts the wood. The arches one way is the front edge of the blade and the arches the other way is when the log passes the back side of the blade. This type of mill generates about 70% more wasted wood as saw dust than a band saw creates. Think of an overgrown skill saw. I know as I grew up with a circular blade saw mill in the back yard and hope to never shovel another load of saw dust ever!

Otherwise, gladly waiting on the rest of this TR!

 

[DebbieT11]

Dear Trollman, please tell me that you were able to stay at the fort for WEEKS, right??? Loving your TR.

 

[takeme2epcot]

Hi folks!

There are quite a few comments I've been meaning to respond to but haven't had the time, so let's get caught up!

Hey Troll,

I'm getting caught up with your report and am enjoying reading the nostalgic aspects of it. But I gotta correct you here.

My DW actually watched the wagon being removed from it's spot and taken behind the TP back on March 18th. She immediately reported it to me and I posted it here...along with a pic of it sitting in it's "new home" behind the Settlement TP per this post.

TCD has given me a hard time about my Dole Whip dispensing skills, so I ain't gonna let him get the credit for this one. It's Not Cindy deserves the kudos for the water wagon scoop!

Ok, carry on....

I stand corrected! TCD, please deduct one "props point" from your account, return it to me, and I will properly credit said props point to Dave in Tennessee and his DW!

Sorry about that.

I am new here, after all.

And a troll.

Maybe I was deliberately giving props to the wrong person to stir up controversy!

That's what Trollkind does!

Just kidding.

No, I'm just dumb.

Norm-
I never knew that the whole lawnmower used to be there. For all of my visits, up to now, all you could see were pieces of the lawnmower embedded in the tree. I have never seen a photo with a whole lawnmower sticking out of the tree. I would love to see that!

RIP Lawnmower tree.

TCD

I'm not fully certain that the entire lawnmower was present, but I remember seeing it very young -- around the age of 5 or 6 -- and recognizing right away without any explanation that it was an old timey push mower embedded in the tree. Neighbors of ours still had a an old push mower, and I would push it around whenever the neighbors left it out.

Good grief, I could have cut my foot off!

I've never seen a more beautiful family of trolls.

Of course, I no longer consider you a troll. But I'll still have to keep it as a pet name. I hope you'll understand.

Actually I wish I could change my screen name to The Troll! I wonder if I can?

Hey, Mr. Moderator, can you help a troll out?!

My wife Leslie just signed up for the boards using the name "Mrs. Troll"!

Dear Trollman, please tell me that you were able to stay at the fort for WEEKS, right??? Loving your TR.

Nope, unfortunately not. Just one week. But Mrs. Troll is now a full blooded, fully converted Fort Fiend, and she's already ready to make a return visit.

When we were first planning our FW trip, she said, "Well, all right...I guess, since it means so much to you..."

Then when our trip was winding towards a close, she said, "OK, so when do you want to come back? January? February?"

Fantastic TR. I am loving it. One point of contention though, this photo:

The circular indentions are not made from a band saw at all. These logs were cut with a circular saw blade. The teeth are set one to one side, the next to the other side and so on so that the turning circle of the blade cuts the wood. The arches one way is the front edge of the blade and the arches the other way is when the log passes the back side of the blade. This type of mill generates about 70% more wasted wood as saw dust than a band saw creates. Think of an overgrown skill saw. I know as I grew up with a circular blade saw mill in the back yard and hope to never shovel another load of saw dust ever!

Otherwise, gladly waiting on the rest of this TR!

Hmmmm...well, my brother Mike never operated a circular sawmill...just a bandsaw mill.

So maybe he was mistaken?

I don't know...those grooves sure look like the result of a bent tooth to me. But then again, I don't know much about sawmills, honestly. I'm sure you know much, much more about it than I do!

 

[Tri-circle-D]

But Mrs. Troll is now a full blooded, fully converted Fort Fiend, and she's already ready to make a return visit.

When we were first planning our FW trip, she said, "Well, all right...I guess, since it means so much to you..."

Then when our trip was winding towards a close, she said, "OK, so when do you want to come back? January? February?"

Lucky you!

So when is it?

TCD

 

[takeme2epcot]

Now on with the show!

Have you noticed that Mr. TCD is posting a Thanksgiving Trip Report?

Of course you have.

I'm worried the Troll Trip Report is going to lose viewers.

It's like being on against American Idol!

Oh yeah! In a previous installment, I mentioned that I met TCD and I mistakenly stated that he had infiltrated RC once. I was wrong about that. TCD and I actually talked about it. It was another person who infiltrated RC and gave the photos to TCD to post and comment on.

Woops.

Speaking of RC, I loved that place. There was so much charm about it. It was charming just in its basic simplicity -- two body slides, a river rapids ride, and a pool with two drop slides.

Take your pick.

You ever watch that show where that British chef Gordon Ramsey goes to failing restaurants and fixes them up to make them profitable? One of the very first things he always does is change the menu. Typically each one of those failing restaurants has a huge, confusing, and overwhelming menu of choices to choose from. What does Ramsey do? He trims it down to five or six entrees.

He keeps it simple.

It's like a buffet. A lot of people go to buffets, but many, many people all complain about the same thing: Too many options. There's just way too much to choose from. You pick one thing, and then instead of sitting back and savoring that one thing, you wolf it down so you can run back up and try something else.

Then you walk away full but somehow dissatisfied.

Modern water parks like Blizzard Beach and Typhoon Lagoon are like that. There are just too many options! You're overwhelmed.

River Country kept it simple. You appreciated each attraction much more that way.

So I decided, of course, like every other FW veteran overcome by nostalgia, to take a walk around the RC area open to the public.

Here are some shots of the ticket booth:

OK, hold the phone! Yes, I know I've only posted two pictures so far, but stop for a moment and take a look at that sign. It says, "Relaxing pool and springs."

The folks at Wikipedia define a spring as this: "Any natural situation where water flows to the surface of the earth from underground. Thus, a spring is a site where the aquifer surface meets the ground surface."

I began going to RC in 1976, right after it first opened. I know for a fact there was no spring at that water park!

What RC had was a kiddie splash play area named "Indian Springs," which was neither natural nor relaxing!

A little bit of false advertising there, Mr. Disney!

Also a bit of a stretch there, Mr. Disney!

And what's this?! A lantern? In a troll's trip report? Impossible!

I really like this shot and the lantern. The lantern has such an authentic look to it. Also notice that the glass is frosted. That way, Disney can put those new twisty "Go Green" bulbs in them without the ugly twisty "Go Green" bulb being visible.

Those "Go Green" bulbs are a great idea, but man are they ugly:

I like things that can't be dated, things that are "timeless." Go Green twisty bulbs are too modern.

I love this fencing:

Couldn't they have made the dog park fencing look more like this somehow?

Look at the rope hooks on certain posts:

These are the things cast members hook cordon ropes to to close off the area to guests. I like the way it looks like the hooks on a dock that you tie your boat to. Nice riverboat-type touch. River Country...river boat...attention to detail!

It could, after all, just have been a simple hook.

Here's the downspout behind the RC ticket booth:

Doesn't look like the barrel is catching much rain water anymore.

And then look at this...I found it odd:

This logo was painted on the backdoor of the ticket booth and is very plainly visible to guests. Yet the logo looks way too modern for RC. Could it have been an actual product placement?

It sure is:

Well now that's as mercenary as it gets -- a modern product placement in the midst of a water park exquisitely and meticulously themed to look old fashioned! Have those boardroom execs no shame?

I wonder if they realize there are nuts like the Fort Fiends who pay attention to, photograph, and comment on little things like this?

The water fountain in front of the old ticket booth still works:

Just think -- many years ago kids like me would take a refreshing sip of water out of this fountain while their parents waited in line to buy tickets to get in.

This cage sits next to the ticket booth:

Fortunately the bird that once lived in it was able to escape the decay and neglect that's overcome RC:

He was like, "I'm out of here, bee-yotches!" and flew the coop.

Here's the ubiquitous, ugly green fence that blocks the decay of RC from the curious public:

It's about as foreboding and forbidding as the Berlin Wall. It just screams, "Keep out!" and, "Don't even try to look or go back here!"

But then walk ten feet through some loose landscaping and you come upon the original RC fence:

And here's an old in-ground sprinkler that just screams 1976:

It's still in pretty good shape.

And here they are, those awesome freefall slides, the Upstream Plunge:

As a 10-year-old troll, these slides were terrifying! Just think, 31 years ago, I slid down each of those slides over and over and over. Thousands of other kids did, too. Now they sit dry, crumbling, and all but forgotten.

Remember how I commented on the odd tendency of Disney to leave certain attractions in a spooky state of maintenance and decay?

Well, this area absolutely epitomizes it. The roof of the bird cage thing is giving way:

Yet the shower house sign is still in perfect, opening day shape:

And there are no showers in there anymore! Well, there might be showers, but they're walled off.

But the sign looks brand new.

There are old Mr. Pibb cans discarded here and there:

Yet the towel and sundry booth looks freshly painted:

This fence is crumbling away:

Yet go around the corner of the towel and sundry booth, and the door looks like it's still being used:

This picture says it all:

The old classic RC rocks are fading and crumbling, yet the tree crew has dutifully come back here and marked branches for trimming back.

This rope is in great shape:

 

[Lil' Lisa]

.

 

[takeme2epcot]

And actually, so is this old RC rock:

But then there are more soda cans strewn about, fading:

Notice that some of those cans were never even opened!

So this mix of maintenance and decay gives this area a very creepy feel, like the ghosts of old RC cast members were never notified that RC is closed and so they just continue to maintain their assigned areas.

I think the shower/bathroom area creeped me out the most. I suppose it's open for the Backyard BBQ thing, but during the day there's nobody back here.

And yet it's still well maintained.

And why does the sign still say " & Showers"?

Anyway, I was beginning to feel heavy hearted at seeing things this way, so I decided I better move on.

Up next: I recall a near tragedy at RC and the Troll's stepson pays a visit!

 

[Lil' Lisa]

.

 

[Tri-circle-D]

Have you noticed that Mr. TCD is posting a Thanksgiving Trip Report?

Of course you have.

I'm worried the Troll Trip Report is going to lose viewers.

It's like being on against American Idol!

Norm, don't worry about TCD.

TCD is over-rated.

This trip report of yours has a lot of readers.

You are doing fine.

Just do your best.

About the Fishing Logo on the River Country ticket booth . . .

For a while, the ticket booth was co-opted by the fishing guides.

It looked like this:

There was a plywood barricade in front of the ticket booth:

These next two shots are what you could see if you peeked around the plywood barricade that was erected in front of the ticket booth. These were bait tanks that were used by the recreation department for fishing excursions. Also, note that the ticket prices were still posted on the concealed ticket booth.

This is what the burrowing owl's cage looked like before they cleaned it up:

Why do I feel like there is "bromance" in the air???

Well, we did meet on-line.

Interesting... The showers in the mens room are gone, but there is still an area in the ladies room where there are showers. I wonder why they would remove them from one and not the other??? The showers that are left aren't the private kind like in the comfort stations, but rather the public kind where you rinse yourself off in your bathing suit after using the pool.

There are showers accessible in the ladies' room? I didn't see them when I inspected the ladies' room earlier this year. There were hair dryers mounted to the wall, but no showers.

TCD

 

[storyteller]

Oh, the memories....