Touring with my parents

[iona]

We're hoping to take my parents for their first Disney trip to celebrate their 40th wedding anniversary. They'll be 67/68 and (a very fit) 77/78 (depending on when we go). I'd like to think that DH and I are WDW experts, we've spent over 150 days in the parks since 2005, but it's always been just us. Therefore, if anyone has any advice on either travelling with family or experiencing the parks as/with retirees I'd really appreciate it!

 

[lborne]

My advice - don't. Just kidding. These suggestions are mostly because they are disney virgins, not because of their age: Go over the attractions / park maps with them before hand and see what they think they would enjoy. Same with the restaurant menus. Since they are your parents, you probably already know their likes and dislikes. While my parents would love Living with the Land, they would hate Mission Space. Take it slow. Don't feel you have to show them everything. No matter how fit they are, keep things relaxed and try to avoid long lines. Probably more important to go on a day when it won't be crowded than a day like July 4. Listen to them. Once we took some friends that had never been and even thought they said they liked it, I think they hated it because we were running from attraction to attraction trying to cram in the most we could wanting to show them everything and feeling completely responsible for their happiness.

 

[xlsm]

My first joking response was the same as lborne...don't!!

I am kind of in the same boat...I'm a pro at trips with my DH and kids, but I'm going alone with my mother-in-law in May, and again with just my mom next October...it's causing me some stress.

I'm finding it so hard to come to a balance between fitting in the things I know they'll like and still taking it easier than I would on my own. My MIL can become very negative and moody, so I'm extra worried about that particular visit. I am only making two ADRs and we're going to go slow and wing it as much as possible. I think my acting skills will be put to the test!
The trip with my own mom won't be as bad, she's more adventurous than MIL. MIL is afraid of and nervous about EVERYTHING.

My overall approach with MIL is to make it very clear right off the bat that we do not have to spend every waking second together, and to remind myself to slow down.
Let them do some things on their own, have a day where you just meet up for a meal, and other days where you stick together more. Make sure they look at park/resort maps ahead of time and try to prepare them for the sheer size of the place without making it seem scary or overwhelming (easier said than done, haha!).

Good luck with your planning, and have an amazing trip!! After the worry subsides, you guys will have so much fun and make so many memories!!

 

[conandrob240]

If no little kids involved, I'd choose a different way to celebrate their 40th, in all seriousness. Unless Disney is something they've dreamed of for years or a trip where they'll get to see the joy of their grandchildren enjoying it, it's probably not for them, fit or not.

How about a cruise? Trip to the Caribbean?

 

[conandrob240]

Why are you going alone with your MIL? I don't get it. Is she wanting to go? Doesn't sound like it.

 

[xlsm]

Why are you going alone with your MIL? I don't get it. Is she wanting to go? Doesn't sound like it.

I'm assuming this is directed at me.

Because I want to torture her, of course. And spend a week being miserable.

No, in reality, it's because she actually DOES want to go and she's very excited. She and I are not very close, and in an effort to extend an olive branch and have a special experience together, I invited her to go to WDW, just the two of us. She loves Beauty and the Beast and I'm planning a Beauty and the Beast-centric trip for her. We're staying in a savanna view room at AKL so she can see the animals, and spending a lot of time at the Flower and Garden festival, because she loves flowers and gardening and all things nature. She is an artist and uses pressed flowers in her art, and I know she will love seeing all of the landscaping and topiaries and taking in some of the presentations and maybe doing a tour or two.
Does she get anxious about new things? Yes. Will she be ok once she's there? Probably. Does she hate flying? Yes. Will she get on the plane anyway after knocking back a couple xanax? Yes. Will she find a bunch of things to complain about and get grouchy when she gets tired? Yes, but so does a kid, and most people bring those along to Disney World.

I didn't get into all of that in my original post because it really had no bearing on the thread at all, I was just sharing my own anxieties about planning a trip with someone other than my husband and kids. OP asked about traveling with family members and I shared my plan for how I intend to manage my own trip with my MIL - by making sure we each have our own time and space if we need it, and slowing down my usual touring pace so she doesn't feel overwhelmed.

She's only 60, so hardly an old lady, she's just never experienced anything like this before. I'm nervous, she's nervous...we'll be in close quarters for a week.


As for the OP, I think it's great she wants to take her parents to WDW, who needs kids to have fun there?? Not every trip needs to be gogogo, riderideride, eateateat. Part of the charm of Disney World is taking in your surroundings and enjoying small magical moments that you might ordinarily overlook. Even though I'm nervous about traveling with my MIL, I'm still excited to take her and try to make some memories with her that are just ours...something special that she and I can look back on. I'm sure OP is looking to make the same sort of memories with her parents, and treat them to something special for their 40th.

 

[skuttle]

We went with my inlaws last December. My MIL is in pretty good shape, but my FIL has knee trouble and, little did we know, was about a week or two away from having a heart attack, so had some SOB during the trip as well. Since it was their first trip in years, and we go regularly, we planned our days with them in mind and picked things that we knew they would enjoy as well as our own kids. We went at their pace. But we also told them they could stick with us or do their own thing. We weren't offended either way! I'd say the majority of the time we stayed together, but there were times when we split up. We stayed at different resorts as well, so that also allowed us our space.

We did a similar thing with my SIL and her family a few years ago. Planned with them in mind, knowing it was their first trip and made an effort to do the things you should do (and eat at the places you should eat) when you area first timer, even though for us we'd probably skip it. We again told them they were more than welcome to stick with us and follow our plan, or go their own way. We stayed together. however, again, we stayed at different resorts so had space in the evenings and mornings.

 

[conandrob240]

I go plenty without kids but we love Disney. I am assuming that people at 70+ years of age who haven't been mainly aren't huge Disney lovers. If they aren't real Disney fans and don't have an alternate reason for wanting to go (seeing their grandchildren enjoy it), maybe re-think it. I am a huge Disney fan,parents are not. They were happy to go once to enjoy with their grandchildren. I considered it for their 50th but realized it was me wanting it, not really them. So we did a cruise.

 

[goopysolelady]

Well...this 67 year can keep up with the best of them ...including a teenager and a 10 year old who "goes 100 mph" ALL the time! Seriously though, great idea...DH and I are taking a trip...ALONE...in December for our 45th anniversary celebration. In all fairness, I will admit that I like to spend a lot of time alone...strolling the parks looking for out of the ordinary photo shots and my family allows me that time alone without question. On our November trip last year I was at the park later than "the girls" on more than one night; the only time I left for the resort alone and early was after a POURING DOWN RAIN SHOWER totally flooding the streets of the MK, carrying my camera equipment, packages from the Emporium, my backpack AND the rest of my dinner left over from Tony's. And then it was only after I discovered their "choice of rides" (since everything was a "walkup") was going to be OUTDOOR RIDES and Space Mountain! My advice to you would be to spend maybe 50% of the day with them and informing them of the "quiet, indoor" attractions and shows...like the movies in the WS; the American Adventure; the shows at HS and AK etc. My family isn't as fond of these as I am so I often visit these spots during my "alone" time. Fantasyland would be a good area to spend time with them...IASM, Peter Pan, Under the Sea, etc. for them to become oriented with "Disney magic". And remember...once they discover that magic, they may be more enthusiastic than you when they find their inner "young at heart".

 

[Tucker24]

You are very brave to go with MIL. We went with both in laws and the kids and it was hell every step of the way.For some reason DH and I forgot one important thing and that is how much she loves to shop. If your MIL or parents for that matter like to shop than schedule some time for that. My MIL is also afraid of heights and clostrophobic so she refused to go on a lot of rides. I've never been on a tour before but they might like some behind the scenes type of adventures. You could also do an anniversary scvaneger hunt like"take your picture with ...

 

[gap2368]

I think you need to find with they are interested in and do things around that like EISM said

a few other things do not plane things minute to minutes have an idea of what park to go to and you 3 FP and maybe a few ADR but also have time for them to rest ( either in the park or back at the hotel) have some time for if they really do enjoy some thing simple they can. or take a tour they can ( I am thinking along the lines of behind the seed tour at EPCOT)

ask them question about rides do they like roller coaster, do they like to get wet, do they want to see the night time show, do they want to do non ride tings, would they like to focus on food and eating different foods. Do they want a schedule and if so how much of a schedule ( and I would also conceder letting them know about FP if they want to do rides and having a general idea of what parks and FP can be very important ) I am sure you can think of more. take this with what you all ready know about them and then plane out your days.

 

[iona]

Thanks all, there's some good advice in there.

For clarity, we're going to ask them if they'd like to come with us rather than tell them that they are doing so! We're also tying it in with their wedding anniversary so that we can get round their likely insistence that they pay their way (which isn't the plan at all!) and we won't be out there for their actual anniversary - I believe they have their own plans for a romantic trip for the two of them.

 

[FanofG00fy]

My experience with going with my parents was twice while dad worked then about 10 to 12 times with them after they retired. To be honest, I found it so much better with them after he retired. First remember, you are not responsible for their happiness and they are not responsible for your happiness. Second, go in with no expectations. If you expect them to love something you love and they don't, do not get upset. Third, go with the flow. Do not over plan, but make sure they are 100% involved in the planning. They will know what to expect. Fourth, make sure you get space apart. Remember one thing also, you are going to have a blast because you are going to be seeing the park through "virgin" eyes. Fifth, ENJOY this! Since our last trip I lost my father. Now it's mom and me. We are going in 24 days. Have fun.