To DIS or not DIS the hubby

[APiratesLifeForMe2]

I am trying to plan our next trip to either be September 2014 or September 2015 but the questions of who to go with remains my predicament. Naturally, since I am married I am inclined to make the obvious decision and choose my hubby. Frankly though, he isn't my favorite Disney travel companion. Growing up I always went with my mom and we do Disney in the exact same way. We like the same rides, prefer to ride them as many times as we possible can, like afternoon breaks to rest in the room, enjoy the same restaurants and have the same idea of how much time to spend at each park.

The first time I went with my hubby I quickly realized he does not like to rest mid day, prefers to see and do EVERYTHING and is not a fan of riding a ride as many times as you possibly can. Since I haven't been with my mom in over 5 years I am itching to bring her along on the next trip so I can Disney how I want! Although Disney in September is really a super cheap time and we would rent DVC or stay in value, the cost of a Disney trip is still a pretty decent dent in our budget. I can't help but think it would be very selfish to set aside money for my Disney trip and leave him out (my mom would pay her half). I have considered bringing both of them but DH would NEVER share a room with DMIL so that adds on cost of two rooms etc.

Although I have been trying to plan this for over a year, I am no further in my decision then when I began. So I come to you for some advise. Maybe there is an option I haven't thought of?

 

[com_op_2000]

Why not do both? Rent a DVC one or two bdrm.
Spend the day visiting the parks with your mom except one day spend with the DH. Let DH go do what he wants during the day, meet up for lunch once, and then the two of you make some evening plans.
Some of the things DH could do (depending on what he is into) without you are:
sports: golf, fishing, RPDE, marathon, bowling, ESPN Club, WWS/ESPN Zone, etc
shopping: DTD, area outlet malls, large scale malls
resort tours: monorail tour of resorts, Boardwalk around the lake tour of resorts, AKL/AKV
offsite: Gaylord Palms Resort, Citywalk, swamp tour
Some of the things the two of you could do in the evening:
drinking: Jellyrolls, Raglan Road, monorail tour of resorts, walking tour of resorts in the Boardwalk area
movies: DTD 24 screen theater some with meals served by waiters
night clubbing: Jellyrolls, Atlantic Dance, Raglan Road, Citywalk

 

[rustyfla]

As a husband, I find nothing wrong with the mother/daughter duo vacation.
Your mom will not always be around, so enjoy the great times you can have now.

Start planning another trip to Disney, or wherever with your husband for another time. This way he is not being left out. It doesn't have to be a vacation that costs a lot of money. You could even play tourist in your own town.

Definately enjoy the time you have with your parents, that time spent together means more to them than you will ever know.

 

[KateB]

So I know how you feel. My DH is not as fanatical about Disney as I am so this year I got him to agree that my mom & I could go alone. I had to guilt trip him a little, reminding him that the trip would be half the price and that these are the important moments I need with my mom. My mom & I had never been to Disney without my DH and dad.

Two very huge benefits of this year's trip is that my DH definitely missed me on my 7 day trip AND he realized how much he missed Disney. About a month after I came back we were discussing our anniversary next year (5 years) and he suggested we do a long WDW trip! Yay! We own DVC so naturally we go each year. However, I am usually pushing him to go. This year he was very jealous and didn't want to hear about all the fun we had.

I say go with your mom & then plan another trip with your hubby later.

 

[Disneyhearts]

I have almost the same situation as you only I am the one who likes to hit the parks hard with no rest and Hubby wants to relax. I was a single mom for quite a long time and had always done Disney with my kids...just the 3 of us. I got remarried 3 years ago and did our first vacation to Disney with my hubby and the kids as well as my sister last summer. Now thank goodness I already knew how my hubby likes to vacation, we had already had a major blowout on our first trip together to Cuba. His idea of a good time is plopping himself on a resort beach with plenty of food and drink and my idea of a good time was hopping on the first motorcycle that passed by getting the locals to show me around all day. I think he is boring on vacation and he thinks I am nuts (maybe I am just a little bit of a risk taker lol) So I didn't want him ruining our Disney trip by being all sulky because we wore him out the first day. We had to take 2 weeks to spread out our park days and had lots of rest days lounging at the resort in between. It worked out really well. I was so worried he would hate Disney but he really enjoyed it and actually added park days to his itinerary. So that worked quite well for us. My daughter is now 20 and working full time and she and I decided to do a trip this fall as I was offered free dining. DH cant get time off work and DS (13) is not able to take that long off school. We only have 9 days instead of 2 weeks and he understands how I like to do our Disney trips (10th time with DD) so he gave us his blessing and said go have fun. He and I will plan a couples trip for next year and I promised DS that we will do something special just the 2 of us in December for his Bday. The beauty of this whole situation is I end up getting 3 trips!!!! I say do the trip with just your mom the way you like to do it and plan something you and your hubby will both enjoy for another time. 12 more days till we leave for our momma/daughter trip!!

 

[APiratesLifeForMe2]

Why not do both? Rent a DVC one or two bdrm.
Spend the day visiting the parks with your mom except one day spend with the DH. Let DH go do what he wants during the day, meet up for lunch once, and then the two of you make some evening plans.
Some of the things DH could do (depending on what he is into) without you are:
sports: golf, fishing, RPDE, marathon, bowling, ESPN Club, WWS/ESPN Zone, etc
shopping: DTD, area outlet malls, large scale malls
resort tours: monorail tour of resorts, Boardwalk around the lake tour of resorts, AKL/AKV
offsite: Gaylord Palms Resort, Citywalk, swamp tour
Some of the things the two of you could do in the evening:
drinking: Jellyrolls, Raglan Road, monorail tour of resorts, walking tour of resorts in the Boardwalk area
movies: DTD 24 screen theater some with meals served by waiters
night clubbing: Jellyrolls, Atlantic Dance, Raglan Road, Citywalk

The cost of doing the villa would probably be too expensive just for the three of us. Even a one bedroom is almost $1000 more for the vacation then staying in a preferred room at pop. If my DH goes then he wouldn't want to wonder off on his own, he would want to come ride the rides but wouldn't want to go back a second or third time in a row and would want me to stay in the park with him all day. If he had someone else to go with him I am sure I could get him to do some other activities but he doesn't like doing anything alone!

As a husband, I find nothing wrong with the mother/daughter duo vacation.
Your mom will not always be around, so enjoy the great times you can have now.

Start planning another trip to Disney, or wherever with your husband for another time. This way he is not being left out. It doesn't have to be a vacation that costs a lot of money. You could even play tourist in your own town.

Definately enjoy the time you have with your parents, that time spent together means more to them than you will ever know.

Thank you for the husband perspective. I hope my DH will see it as a compromise. I go with my mom and then I can go with him on a vacation more catered to his likes.

So I know how you feel. My DH is not as fanatical about Disney as I am so this year I got him to agree that my mom & I could go alone. I had to guilt trip him a little, reminding him that the trip would be half the price and that these are the important moments I need with my mom. My mom & I had never been to Disney without my DH and dad.

Two very huge benefits of this year's trip is that my DH definitely missed me on my 7 day trip AND he realized how much he missed Disney. About a month after I came back we were discussing our anniversary next year (5 years) and he suggested we do a long WDW trip! Yay! We own DVC so naturally we go each year. However, I am usually pushing him to go. This year he was very jealous and didn't want to hear about all the fun we had.

I say go with your mom & then plan another trip with your hubby later.

Thank you! Perhaps he will miss me and think about how much he likes Disney and then want to plan another trip to include him. I think your on to something here...

I have almost the same situation as you only I am the one who likes to hit the parks hard with no rest and Hubby wants to relax. I was a single mom for quite a long time and had always done Disney with my kids...just the 3 of us. I got remarried 3 years ago and did our first vacation to Disney with my hubby and the kids as well as my sister last summer. Now thank goodness I already knew how my hubby likes to vacation, we had already had a major blowout on our first trip together to Cuba. His idea of a good time is plopping himself on a resort beach with plenty of food and drink and my idea of a good time was hopping on the first motorcycle that passed by getting the locals to show me around all day. I think he is boring on vacation and he thinks I am nuts (maybe I am just a little bit of a risk taker lol) So I didn't want him ruining our Disney trip by being all sulky because we wore him out the first day. We had to take 2 weeks to spread out our park days and had lots of rest days lounging at the resort in between. It worked out really well. I was so worried he would hate Disney but he really enjoyed it and actually added park days to his itinerary. So that worked quite well for us. My daughter is now 20 and working full time and she and I decided to do a trip this fall as I was offered free dining. DH cant get time off work and DS (13) is not able to take that long off school. We only have 9 days instead of 2 weeks and he understands how I like to do our Disney trips (10th time with DD) so he gave us his blessing and said go have fun. He and I will plan a couples trip for next year and I promised DS that we will do something special just the 2 of us in December for his Bday. The beauty of this whole situation is I end up getting 3 trips!!!! I say do the trip with just your mom the way you like to do it and plan something you and your hubby will both enjoy for another time. 12 more days till we leave for our momma/daughter trip!!

Oh my you aren't kidding about being opposites. I do like to spend the majority of my time in the park and love to ride the rides and see the shows but I also need a break sometimes. On our last trip it was so cold and I was so exhausted from stress at work that I just needed everything taken down a notch. All I wanted to do was spend an hour in the room to recharge mid day but he hated it. We stayed at POP so the hour in the room really took up two hours when you account for the 20 minute bus ride and walking to the room. We were also used to traveling in September and we went about two weeks before Christmas which was crowded compared to September. I left that vacation being so upset that it tainted my Disney love/obsession. I couldn't wait to get home. I have definitely learned my DH and I prefer different types of vacations and it is a chore to try and combine what we each like to get the magic trip recipe.


I think I could honestly spend the rest of my life only vacationing to Disney World. My DH would rather travel the world and see everything at least once. It's not that I don't want to see the world as well, but each non Disney Vacation only means the next Disney vacation is further away. Surely they make pills for this condition? Going with my mom seems like quite the magical solution. DH gets a break from Disney and if I can just plan to budget in a non-Disney vacation for him when I get back I think he will be completely fine with it. Thanks everyone for the help

 

[wiigirl]

As a husband, I find nothing wrong with the mother/daughter duo vacation.
Your mom will not always be around, so enjoy the great times you can have now.

Start planning another trip to Disney, or wherever with your husband for another time. This way he is not being left out. It doesn't have to be a vacation that costs a lot of money. You could even play tourist in your own town.

Definately enjoy the time you have with your parents, that time spent together means more to them than you will ever know.

 

[MissMaryQC]

While I don't have a DH, I do have a DBF; we are married without the certificate. He is not a part going like I am; he likes to wander the parks and ride the rides, but he isn't much for parades, fireworks, crazy themed restaurants, etc. So when I decided to plan a BIG WDW trip I invited my mother and adult LilSis; DBF is staying home with the cats! We haven't been on a girls only trip in almost 10 years so we are doing Disney how we want to! For me, DBF and I have so much time for vacations and things like that, but my original unit (mom and LilSis) don't necessarily. That's just my two cents.

 

[Bete]

Maybe, you should present all the scenarios to hubby and you may be surprised at his answers. He may say go with your mom and he'll be happy for you. You do save some money just going with your mom.

My best suggestion is for him to plan a separate vacation with a friend or family member of his own while you are gone on your vacation with your mom. Both of you can take a separate vacation for one year.

Furthermore, if you rent a house there you could invite a friend/ family member for hubby and you would have your mom. Then, you could be together or apart at times.

Perhaps save a little longer and get that Disney villa with you, hubby and your mom.

If you would get over staying on site you could get a very nice two bedroom suite with kitchen nearby for a reasonable price. We stay at the Residence Inn. We have done this place with my mom. They have bus service to the parks. One hassle, here is you do get dropped off at Epcot and you need to do the Disney transportation to get to the other parks. This will take longer. In return you get a marvelous breakfast included at the resort. It pulls us through the day time hours. The resort serves an evening reception three times a week. It's enough for us to make a meal out of it. We do take a car on our trip; so, we don't have to deal with the transportation issue, but we see others using it. You could rent a car. By car I find it about the same as Disney transportation coming from POP.

 

[spiceycat]

go with your mom - sounds like you miss going to WDW with her - so do it.

Your husband would probably agree so you can talk to your mom about the trip and not to him.

some people assume everyone has money - understand now I do own DVC but brought back in 93 when it was cheap. sold OKW to buy BLT - and boy do I love it. sold 280 points and brought 120 points - so it cost me.

regardless - you should go with your mom - it sounds like you will enjoy the trip more.

in Sept they will probably have the free dinning - so despite loving DVC might go with Pop - because of the fd