tips for getting rats nests out of a child's long hair and making the hair more smooth?

[mom2cgj]

Definitely get it trimmed! Even an inch or two can make a huge difference in the health of the hair and it will grow faster after it gets trimmed, which will make up for it. My daughter is a dancer, so she has to keep her hair long and even lengths for competition season. As soon as the last competition is over every year, she cuts off about 6 inches, and it grows back and then some very quickly. We use a lot of detangled spray, a wet brush, and put it up most of the time - buns, braids, etc.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

For both my daughters, the key is to blow dry their hair. That may seem counter intuitive, but it helps immensely in not only detangling, but keeping it neat all day.

 

[wenrob]

my niece is 7 and she has rather long hair and really like long hair (says she wants to be like rapunzel).

the problem is she does not want to maintain it and when it is brushed through very well it does not stay nice for long.

even fresh out of the shower her hair feels like straw like when you just get out of a chlorine pool.

my sister has tried a number of products (not entirely sure of which ones) in her hair and she has not been able to find even one that works well and makes her hair smoother and easier to brush.

she also has the wet brush detangling brush which is not making brushing much easier.

we've all told her that she is gonna have to get her hair cut to a more manageable length but she becomes very upset as she wants her hair to be long. (of course my sister knows that she can force her to do it because after all she is only 7 and she is not the one in control but we all think it would be counter productive and kinda cruel to force her to get it cut).

so please i am open to suggestions about what products you have found that have worked well.

My youngest DD has this issue. I can comb her hair and ten minutes later it looks like I did nothing. What has helped immensely is getting rid of the kid's products and going with good quality shampoo and conditioner. Also when she gets out of the shower after towel drying, I come through and lightly blow dry, combing in between as I go. We use Paul Mitchell Lite Detangler on the daily and it's made a world of difference. Don't use the kid's detanglers, they are crap and actually make the issue worse in my experience.

eta-I agree long layers help as well. Just make sure the hair dresser knows you want LONG layers.

 

[whitney250]

Get a Wetbrush from Sally's. That will de tangle her hair with little to no pain (I'm tender headed, too). I also use Biosilk conditioner when I shower and leave it in my hair a good 10 minutes before I rinse. The smoothing serum from Paul Mitchell is what I use as leave in conditioner, put a pump through her hair while it's wet, and then a pump through the ends when it's dry.

 

[usd2bmd]

I'd probably take her and have a few inches taken off to get rid of any dead ends, and show her that I'm serious about cutting if she doesn't take care of it.

Comb wet hair, don't brush. Brush it dry before she gets in the shower to avoid breaking hair getting through wet tangles.

I agree. I have two wide tooth combs, One is in the shower and I use it to comb through my hair after conditioning it. the other i sue before drying it. It's always tough when they are little, because they want long hair but hate to let you near it with a brush or a comb. When my daughter was little, she insisted she wanted long hair but I got sick of the constant battle. I finally took her and had a couple of inches cut off. It was easier to manage and she then took me seriously about caring for it.

We religiously have our haircut every 7 weeks.

 

[wenrob]

Get a Wetbrush from Sally's. That will de tangle her hair with little to no pain (I'm tender headed, too). I also use Biosilk conditioner when I shower and leave it in my hair a good 10 minutes before I rinse The smoothing serum from Paul Mitchell is what I use as leave in conditioner, put a pump through her hair while it's wet, and then a pump through the ends when it's dry.

Yep, this as well. I tell my kids to get in, wash their hair, add conditioner, then wash their body etc. rinse hair very last.

 

[teacherlisa1978]

Long hair gal here. I second what others are saying about conditioning as son as you can in the shower and leaving it in after combing while washing in the shower. I also only shampoo a couple times a week. I thought this would make my hair greasy but after a week or so it adjusted. Also, yes, regular trims seem counterintuitive but they are important.

 

[marmalade]

You can put all the product in the world in her hair but if the hair is damaged and needs to be trimmed nothing is going to work.

I just went through this with my 10yr old. She wanted Rapunzel hair and didn't want it trimmed, it go to the point that the ends were nothing but a rats nest. I had 6 inches cut off (her hair was sitting at the top of her jeans after the cut). She cried at first but the next day when she could brush her hair without issue she realized she needed it cut. Her hair grew back about 2 inches in approx 6 weeks.

Take a few inches off and you'll see a world of difference.

 

[scrapquitler]

When my daughter had long hair and it was always a mess, I explained to her that she had several options:

- She could allow me to use proper products and brush her hair to keep it neat, then I'd braid it or put it in a pony so it wouldn't get tangled.
- She could care for it herself, to my satisfaction or we would revert to the above
- She could cut it shorter so that it would be more manageable

We ended up cutting it. You want long hair, you have to care for it properly. End of discussion.

You should have your sister consult with a hairdresser, maybe a thinning of some thickness and cutting off split ends would help, maybe she could suggest some proper product.

 

[wenrob]

When my daughter had long hair and it was always a mess, I explained to her that she had several options:

- She could allow me to use proper products and brush her hair to keep it neat, then I'd braid it or put it in a pony so it wouldn't get tangled.
- She could care for it herself, to my satisfaction or we would revert to the above
- She could cut it shorter so that it would be more manageable

We ended up cutting it. You want long hair, you have to care for it properly. End of discussion.

You should have your sister consult with a hairdresser, maybe a thinning of some thickness and cutting off split ends would help, maybe she could suggest some proper product.

This kind of happened with my oldest DD. She has insanely thick, coarse (thanks to me), curly (thanks to her dad) hair. Needless to say it is very hard to wash and maintain. She was at that stage that kids go through where they don't care about grooming and it was a constant battle. I finally gave her the same ultimatum: wash it properly and maintain it or we're cutting it. We ended up going with a heavily layered, thinned out cut to just above her shoulders for a couple of years. I don't advocate a short, short cut as that was done to me and I was so embarrassed (in retrospect it was probably done for the same reasons, just the extreme end) but there's nothing wrong with a really good, mid length cut that's easy to take care of if they can't take care of long hair.

 

[pryncess527]

I use an Apple Cider Vinegar/water mix to detangle my hair. It works when my hair is wet, or when it's dry. I drive a convertible, so my hair gets a LOT of wind damage and the tangles used to be insane, but the ACV has made a huge difference.

FWIW, when dry, my hair does NOT smell like vinegar

 

[aprilchem]

When my daughter had long hair and it was always a mess, I explained to her that she had several options:

- She could allow me to use proper products and brush her hair to keep it neat, then I'd braid it or put it in a pony so it wouldn't get tangled.
- She could care for it herself, to my satisfaction or we would revert to the above
- She could cut it shorter so that it would be more manageable

We ended up cutting it. You want long hair, you have to care for it properly. End of discussion.

You should have your sister consult with a hairdresser, maybe a thinning of some thickness and cutting off split ends would help, maybe she could suggest some proper product.

This is what I did with my DD - if you want long hair you either allow me to maintain it properly, or you have to cut it. I ended up having it cut and she has a chin-length bob now (which she's fine with).

 

[Julylady]

When my daughter had long hair and it was always a mess, I explained to her that she had several options:

- She could allow me to use proper products and brush her hair to keep it neat, then I'd braid it or put it in a pony so it wouldn't get tangled.
- She could care for it herself, to my satisfaction or we would revert to the above
- She could cut it shorter so that it would be more manageable

.

This is basically the same thing my sister-in-law did for my youngest niece. She took her to a salon for a trim and deep conditioning. The stylist suggested washing her hair 2-3 times per week instead of every night. IN the shower she puts a liberal amount of conditioner on her hair and combs it through with a wide tooth comb that stays in the shower. She then rinses it out. Once out of the shower, she squeezes her hair with a towel, never rubs it. She then sprays on "Its a 10" and combs that through. Every night she now braids her hair in one long braid down the back. (She often stays overnight with me due to her parents' work schedules so I have a duplicate set up at my house.)

Its been over a year and her hair seems much healthier and always looks nice. She now does it all on her own except spraying the leave in conditioner. Its a large bottle and she can't quite seem to get the right angle.

 

[chiefmickeymouse]

DD15 doesn't usually have trouble with tangles in her long hair, but a couple of weeks ago she got a HUGE knotty tangle in her hair after swimming in a pool. It took me two days to get that thing out, I was beginning to think I'd have to cut it out. I used Argon oil and a detangling comb, kept wetting the hair down with a spray bottle. I had to cut a few pieces within the knot to undo it, but you can't tell unless you're looking for it.

 

[CaoilinnsMom]

try not to wash it too often, that dries it out. Cut a little off the ends. Try washing with a conditioner, you can look that up. Condition if you get it wet. Don't put to much product in it when it is dry, including detangler it causes tangles when it builds up. Use a tangle teaser or something similar, wide-tooth comb. Don't dry it with a hair dryer, let it air dry.

 

[WDWBarb]

Coconut oil on the tangles before washing. Leave it in for half an hour. Shampoo it out AND use conditioner. Then argan oil on the hair after every wash.

 

[tcufrog]

I have long and very thick hair. My younger son used to have thick hair almost to his waist (it was gorgeous) until he insisted on my cutting it. I would get in the shower with him and shampoo his hair. Then I would gently put conditioner on the his hair with my hands and give him some bathtub stickers to play withto distract him. After the conditioner had been on his hair for a few minutes the tangles would loosen. Then I would take a wide tooth pick and gentle start combing his hair in sections starting at the end. The key to not hurting is to hold the section with your non dominant hand and comb with your dominant hand. If you hold the hair you won't pull on her hair and it won't hurt. It takes awhile but it won't damage the hair by pulling on it. When he's done washing his hair I wrap it up in a towel turban to help it dry. I only blow dry on low.

Every night after dinner I'd let him watch a show while I brushed his hair with a detangling brush. If I starting fighting a tangle I'd spray just the tangle with detangling spray. Sometimes if they were really bad I'd gently pick them apart with my hands.