Thoughts on gifts for room attendants, servers, etc.

[HeatherLassell]

Money & Candy!

 

[FigmentSpark]

I think I was surprised at just how many of the CMs were from other countries and not from first world countries. Our waiter was from Indonesia and was away from his young family (small kids) for 4 months at a time, for example. He needs to be able to provide for his family, not have a souvenir. Also, he was one of the ones who gave us the "speech" about excellent rating every night. I was upset about it at first, but then I realized that it was part of his culture to give us that detail and reiterate it, not just gloss over it. DH did the survey, but I made sure he gave them all excellents and we put extra in their envelope. These people are working hard and are friendly, but most aren't your friend or even your host. They are doing the best they can with an opportunity to make a living for their families. Treat them with kindness and be gracious and polite, but in the end, they need a financial gift as a bonus.

 

[bbel]

People work on cruise ships to make money, earn a living. Not to collect stuff.

Not for everyone. If I wanted to make money, I wouldn't have worked on a cruise ship lol.

 

[bbel]

They like money the best.

Yes they do. But not all can accept money...

 

[Flossbolna]

Yes they do. But not all can accept money...

However, the question was about those CMs that are tipped positions. As far as I know from your posts, you were a Youth Activity Counselor. Those are different category and I could see that those CM, who are not allowed to take a tip would appreciate a small gift.

But wouldn't you say that most servers and stateroom attendants would prefer a few extra dollars over some chocolate?

 

[jiminyC_fan]

This topic always makes me chuckle. People are adamant about cash only. Of course everyone knows that someone isn't going to replace or reduce the tip because of a gift. It is in addition to a monetary tip.

I am personal friends now with a CM since 2007. We talk on the phone and/or text. His wife and I now speak to each other. I send things to the ship for him for every holiday and have for years. I choose candy mostly but have personalized a couple of shirts. Maybe just a month or two ago he took a picture of the first gift I gave him and it was a puzzle book. The kind that they do at the dinner tables and such. He was proud that he still had it and wanted to show me. So going that extra mile means a lot to them. If the recipient doesn't like, need, has allergies or whatever excuse DISers comes up with, the CM can still share it with someone else. One time we went to MNSSHP before our cruise and we gave our candy to our stateroom host. He put it in the crew dining room. We don't go around giving gifts to just any CM. We give them to the ones that we formed a special bond with on that particular cruise.

 

[bbel]

However, the question was about those CMs that are tipped positions. As far as I know from your posts, you were a Youth Activity Counselor. Those are different category and I could see that those CM, who are not allowed to take a tip would appreciate a small gift.

But wouldn't you say that most servers and stateroom attendants would prefer a few extra dollars over some chocolate?

Well done Sherlock

Yes money is nice. But sometimes a piece of candy is nice too, kinda feels like someone thought about it. I was good friends with quite a few people in tipped positions (we we're allowed to interact with other departments, contrary to popular belief they didn't lock us in the club) and sitting with them in the mess at times when they pull out a bit of candy you can tell they really appreciate it and they're not sharing it with anyone.

If you also read my other posts, you see I pointed out that it TOTALLY WASNT EXPECTED....

 

[puzzledprincess]

Yea I was mostly asking what sorts of gifts I can give to ANY nice crew member that I encounter. I was in no way suggesting that I won't tip the people in tipped positions with cash. It's just that sometimes some random crew member was nice to me in the hallway or something and I would give them a little baggie of chocolate. Anyway, so I was looking for other ideas to give to unsuspecting crew members that they might enjoy. I'm still definitely going to give money to the tipped positions!

 

[lorenni]

Well done Sherlock

Yes money is nice. But sometimes a piece of candy is nice too, kinda feels like someone thought about it. I was good friends with quite a few people in tipped positions (we we're allowed to interact with other departments, contrary to popular belief they didn't lock us in the club) and sitting with them in the mess at times when they pull out a bit of candy you can tell they really appreciate it and they're not sharing it with anyone.

If you also read my other posts, you see I pointed out that it TOTALLY WASNT EXPECTED....

I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that you are not from a third world country and your motivations for taking a job on a cruise ship were vastly different from the many room stewards and food servers.

Snark is funny short term, but won't hold up for you long term.

 

[lorenni]

Yea I was mostly asking what sorts of gifts I can give to ANY nice crew member that I encounter. I was in no way suggesting that I won't tip the people in tipped positions with cash. It's just that sometimes some random crew member was nice to me in the hallway or something and I would give them a little baggie of chocolate. Anyway, so I was looking for other ideas to give to unsuspecting crew members that they might enjoy. I'm still definitely going to give money to the tipped positions!

I totally appreciate the spirit of what I think you are trying to accomplish here. Given our overall societal tendency to ignore everyone around us, I actually think a tangible gift isn't the best thing you could give. Instead, I would think that actually taking the time to stop and thank someone and explain to them in a few words why you appreciate them or their work would be a powerful and meaningful way to get your message across. In our "it's all about me" world, I think many of us forget to be verbally appreciative (or even nice half of the time).

 

[undertheradar]

Instead of letting this thread get out of hand, how about we all try and respect each other?

 

[mevelandry]

Brand new, first time cruiser here. I've seen some mentions here about gifts for CM and I'm wondering if that's something that is usual/expected for your server team and room attendant. And if so, what makes a good gift for someone stuck on a boat for several months at a time?

Give them a good tip in the end and give them good reviews (mention their name on the comment card). Trust me, it goes a long way. They can bring more money to their family (tip) and get promotions (good reviews on comment cards).

 

[Flossbolna]

Well done Sherlock

Yes money is nice. But sometimes a piece of candy is nice too, kinda feels like someone thought about it. I was good friends with quite a few people in tipped positions (we we're allowed to interact with other departments, contrary to popular belief they didn't lock us in the club) and sitting with them in the mess at times when they pull out a bit of candy you can tell they really appreciate it and they're not sharing it with anyone.

If you also read my other posts, you see I pointed out that it TOTALLY WASNT EXPECTED....

I never implied that you said that it was expected in any way.

I just think it is important for people who are less experienced with DCL and how it works to understand that there are differences between different CMs, depending their position (tipped or not tipped) and also where they come from. You mentioned you did not take the job for the money you earned. I am sure my wonderful server from Indonesia however saw the job as an opportunity to make a good living. So, your perspective on the trinkets that you mentioned that you still enjoy is one of many possible ones. I actually really appreciate you sharing the story about the friends who enjoyed the candy that they were gifted and not sharing it. It is input like that that makes it either for us that only have the guest experience to understand more about the cast experience.

However, my main point about this whole issue is: The average guest does not know a CM well enough to know what this CM would appreciate. That is always the tricky part of giving gifts.

 

[Flossbolna]

Instead of letting this thread get out of hand, how about we all try and respect each other?

I never meant to attack @bbel and read her comment as tongue in cheek not as snarky. I do appreciate her/his perspective as a crew member!

 

[bbel]

I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that you are not from a third world country and your motivations for taking a job on a cruise ship were vastly different from the many room stewards and food servers.

Snark is funny short term, but won't hold up for you long term.

You are correct, fortunately I am not from a third world country. But I did live in one for 18 months prior to my Disney days...
Im going to go out on a limb to say you've never worked for DCL, so you probably don't really have an understanding of how life really is backstage...
A lot of my friends onboard were from said third world countries and I know quite a few would be a little upset that people see them as a charity case that need extra tips because of where they come from.

Some people were asking what else, other than tips, that they could give as a sign of gratitude. I simply answered the question.

Snarky? Working for Disney for so long means I don't need to come to here to be snarky, now, if I tell you to have a magical day...
But being me has achieved me more than I could ever have dreamed of and I've done and seen so much more in my life already that most people from where I'm from will ever do, but thank you for your assessment on my life.

 

[bbel]

I never meant to attack @bbel and read her comment as tongue in cheek not as snarky. I do appreciate her/his perspective as a crew member!

Just putting it out there (not aimed to you, to everyone), however it comes across, I never mean to come across as rude or snarky. I say it how it is, with everything, thats me. Don't like, you don't have to. If I wanted to waste my life trolling boards, Id probably create a separate account, but thats a lot of effort. People here ask questions, I try and answer them. My jobs means I travel a lot on my own, so spend time on here because most of the internet depresses me, a lot of my info is already getting outdated after just a few months, but I just try to help or clear up where I can...

 

[dcassetta]

A lot of my friends onboard were from said third world countries and I know quite a few would be a little upset that people see them as a charity case that need extra tips because of where they come from.

I cannot speak for everyone, but that is never my intent. I tip extra for good service. I am also very aware that most crew on the ship are away from home for long periods of time and work long hours. I hope that the extra money allows them to buy more internet or phone time to stay in touch with their family and friends at home. I do drop off candy and magazines to the youth, merchandise and guest services teams. I also make it a point to note the names of the crew working in the public areas when they provide good service.

 

[ArtemisPhoenix]

Thanks dcassetta! That's probably the most helpful comment so far. And thanks bbel for your input as well. It's very helpful to know that the kids counselors can't accept tips but can accept other things. We have two kids, so we definitely want to have a way for them to show their (and our) appreciation to the people who will be working so hard to make this trip special for them.

Thanks to everyone else who at least tried to make their advice sound a little nice. Whew! These boards are rough...especially considering this is how a question from someone who says they're a brand new cruiser and has a total of three (now four) messages to their credit. I sure appreciate all the info and insight available here...but it may take a bit for me to work up the nerve to ask another question!

 

[jiminyC_fan]

Thanks dcassetta! That's probably the most helpful comment so far. And thanks bbel for your input as well. It's very helpful to know that the kids counselors can't accept tips but can accept other things. We have two kids, so we definitely want to have a way for them to show their (and our) appreciation to the people who will be working so hard to make this trip special for them.

Thanks to everyone else who at least tried to make their advice sound a little nice. Whew! These boards are rough...especially considering this is how a question from someone who says they're a brand new cruiser and has a total of three (now four) messages to their credit. I sure appreciate all the info and insight available here...but it may take a bit for me to work up the nerve to ask another question!

That makes me sad. I am so sorry you experienced it. Ignore the ones that are a bit sassy. Don't let it stop you. A DISer hug for you from me.

 

[cruisehopeful]

While I normally give extra cash, on my last 7 night cruise, I brought my stateroom host a special treat for each day. I figured consumables would be easy to deal with and if she was hungry, she had a little something to snack on without having to go ashore. She was very appreciative.