This could be interesting...

[locolala]

So, I've never posted over here but I figured I might get a few answers and some help from you awesome folks. Little background.. hubby and I are both bi (he calls it ambi). I've had girlfriends in the past, he's had a few flings with guys but nothing serious. He was stationed in Alaska for several years, and during that time became friends with people we shall call Tom and Rebecca. Tom is gay, and didn't know about DHs sexual preference. Rebecca is a lesbian, but became a booty buddy for DH because neither one of them could find someone (makes no sense to me, but whatever). Flash forward to now.. we're going back to Disney this winter. Tom and Rebecca are meeting us there, as they are also friends and hang out on a regular basis. Tom now knows about DH's preferences and wishes he'd known sooner, as he had a thing for him the whole time they were stationed in Alaska together.

Ok.. so basically I have no idea how to deal! I completely trust my hubby and know he's not gonna try to hook up with either of them, but I just think it's gonna be awkward. Help!!!

 

[OrlandoMike]

Just be upfront and let "Tom" know that DH and you are in a commited relationship, and while you value his friendship, thats as far as it's gonna go.

Honesty is always the best policy!

 

[wallyb]

Bedroom Roulette!

 

[UKMark]

Bedroom Roulette!

Who needs theme parks

 

[DVC~OKW~96]

WALLY!!!! You are totally incorrigible!

Yep, let your DH know you are a bit nervous about it, certainly reassure him that he has nothing to be concerned with in regard to you and the other woman, and be sure he knows that you need the same reassurance from him.

Then move on. You love each other. You are in a committed relationship, and that's that, eh?

Wally not withstanding.

 

[jlewisinsyr]

My partner and I are committed to each other but realize that sex is just that and that sex does not equal love.

For us, we have a great relationship, but each relationship has to find its own happy median and having an open communication about that with each other is crucial.

 

[DVCajun]

Being "bi" doesn't equate to being ok with an open relationship.

: kwim?

Sometimes I think that both the glbt and straight communities don't quite get that little (but momentous) fact.

That doesn't mean that there aren't bi folks out there who ARE into that sort of thing, but it certainly isn't the norm. A committed relationship is just that ... two people who love one another and who are NOT ok with either of them having a little fling on the side.

I don't see how hanging with these folks would in any way affect your relationship .... so, you're both bi. You are also both committed to one another. That door simply isn't open.

Unless, of course, it is. Then that's another story.

 

[jlewisinsyr]

A committed relationship is just that ... two people who love one another and who are NOT ok with either of them having a little fling on the side.

Committed is what you make of it, as long as you both are on the same page. You can be committed to each other and still have an open sexual relationship, whether it be strictly threesomes including each other, distinct sexual partners on the side, etc.

 

[DVCajun]

Committed is what you make of it, as long as you both are on the same page. You can be committed to each other and still have an open sexual relationship, whether it be strictly threesomes including each other, distinct sexual partners on the side, etc.

Hmmmm. So I'm getting the distinct feeling that jlewisinsyr is in what we would call an "open" relationship. How interesting.

 

[jlewisinsyr]

Hmmmm. So I'm getting the distinct feeling that jlewisinsyr is in what we would call an "open" relationship. How interesting.

No, I'm in a committed relationship with my boyfriend, who we have an open sexual relationship with others as long as both of us are present. This is part of our committment to each other.

 

[edandcolleen1995]

No, I'm in a committed relationship with my boyfriend, who we have an open sexual relationship with others as long as both of us are present. This is part of our committment to each other.

Committed and open? Sorry but they don't go hand in hand like you pretend...

 

[jlewisinsyr]

Committed and open? Sorry but they don't go hand in hand like you pretend...

I don't pretend, I'm not stuck in a society confined relationship of what people seem to interpret as "normal".

We have been together for 8 years, we are committed to each other, more then most couples, but we don't define a relationship by sex, sex is just that, sex, sex is not love.

 

[locolala]

Ok, OP here lol. While we're not really open to sharing, I guess the thought in my head is that he might want to. He says no, but I'm no psychic. I trust him and love him deeply, so I do believe him. I dunno. I've never been in a relationship where I didn't get hurt, but that's another story. It's funny, the girl in the situation isn't a real looker, but has an amazing personality. The guy is incredibly good looking, lol. Before DH and I started dating, I saw Tom's myspace and thought "dang, he's hot". Thanks for the reassurance though, I appreciate it. As for bedroom roulette.. well, I know Rebecca tends to get.. amorous.. while drinking, so that could be entertaining, lol.

 

[OrlandoMike]

Committed and open? Sorry but they don't go hand in hand like you pretend...

If your relationship works for you, great!

If others have some sort of other type of relationship, great for them...


Please...... let's not judge here!

 

[maleficent's goon]

No, I'm in a committed relationship with my boyfriend, who we have an open sexual relationship with others as long as both of us are present. This is part of our committment to each other.

Hi J

...AHEM

back on topic Loco check your PM's, I sent a story your way that kinda relates.

 

[wallyb]

Sorry.
I'm of the same ilk.

Sex is sex.
Comment is comment.
Love is love.
Some combo of these can exist at the same time -
but they can also be exclusive.

 

[rpmdfw]

The guy is incredibly good looking, lol. Before DH and I started dating, I saw Tom's myspace and thought "dang, he's hot".

Wait. Tom's really hot?

That changes everything!

Well, not for you so much. But you need to post lots of pictures of him!

 

[wallyb]

I volunteer to keep Tom busy for you.

 

[jenn&nelsonrego]

Sorry.
I'm of the same ilk.

Sex is sex.
Comment is comment.
Love is love.
Some combo of these can exist at the same time -
but they can also be exclusive.

 

[jenn&nelsonrego]

Wait. Tom's really hot?

That changes everything!

Well, not for you so much. But you need to post lots of pictures of him!

I volunteer to keep Tom busy for you.

You two!

I swear!