Thinking of leaving corporate world - budgeting advice from those who've managed it

[allthingsmickey]

I'm considering giving up my job to be a SAHM, Disney obsesser, crafter, baker, homemaker, etc. My DH's job is requiring more travel and having both of us working full time is becoming difficult to manage logistically.

We both have to work late sometimes, he has to travel overnight about 1 night a week and sometime more. We don't have grandparents or family in town to pick up our daughter when we are both late which is happening more often. We both feel like we rush home to try to get a couple of hours with our daughter before bedtime and then trying to squeeze every minute of family time in on the weekends. That's fine, but then I realize that it's Sunday night and the laundry's not done, last week's laundry isn't all put away, I forgot to call my mom on her birthday, I didn't get together the 100 items for the 100th day of school, etc, etc., etc.

My husband makes enough that we should be fine financially, but we will have to change some spending habits. So for those of you who have taken the plunge from 2 incomes to 1, what ways have you found to save money? Any tips appreciated.

 

[akcire]

I'm considering giving up my job to be a SAHM, Disney obsesser, crafter, baker, homemaker, etc. My DH's job is requiring more travel and having both of us working full time is becoming difficult to manage logistically.

We both have to work late sometimes, he has to travel overnight about 1 night a week and sometime more. We don't have grandparents or family in town to pick up our daughter when we are both late which is happening more often. We both feel like we rush home to try to get a couple of hours with our daughter before bedtime and then trying to squeeze every minute of family time in on the weekends. That's fine, but then I realize that it's Sunday night and the laundry's not done, last week's laundry isn't all put away, I forgot to call my mom on her birthday, I didn't get together the 100 items for the 100th day of school, etc, etc., etc.

My husband makes enough that we should be fine financially, but we will have to change some spending habits. So for those of you who have taken the plunge from 2 incomes to 1, what ways have you found to save money? Any tips appreciated.

I am currently doing it. I wish I had tried to figure out half or 3/4 time first. My suggestion would be to try those options before you walk away.

 

[Gr8t Fan]

We made the leap 12 years ago, but it is DH who stays home with our kids. Our oldest was battling a chronic health problem, and we decided to have another baby (and have since had one more), so when we decided to have #3 we also decided that DH would stay home full-time. It hasn't always been easy, but we've managed, and it's hard to believe it's been 12 years! We shop the food sales in our area (very lucky to have 4-5 great grocery stores within 2 miles of home) and decide what we'll have for the week based on what is on sale. We eat about 90% of our meals at home and we cook them from scratch. DH does the majority of the shopping, cooking, cleaning and laundry and I pitch in when I can. Good luck to you. I don't think you'll ever regret the time you spend with your child. They grow up so fast. Our oldest will be off to college in 2014.

 

[Southernmiss]

I'm considering giving up my job to be a SAHM, Disney obsesser, crafter, baker, homemaker, etc. My DH's job is requiring more travel and having both of us working full time is becoming difficult to manage logistically.

We both have to work late sometimes, he has to travel overnight about 1 night a week and sometime more. We don't have grandparents or family in town to pick up our daughter when we are both late which is happening more often. We both feel like we rush home to try to get a couple of hours with our daughter before bedtime and then trying to squeeze every minute of family time in on the weekends. That's fine, but then I realize that it's Sunday night and the laundry's not done, last week's laundry isn't all put away, I forgot to call my mom on her birthday, I didn't get together the 100 items for the 100th day of school, etc, etc., etc.

My husband makes enough that we should be fine financially, but we will have to change some spending habits. So for those of you who have taken the plunge from 2 incomes to 1, what ways have you found to save money? Any tips appreciated.

I went from full time to part time employee 14 years ago and haven't looked back!

Before I left full time employment, we saved and had a decent emergency fund and a buffer in our checking account "just in case" which we have never touched.

We also bought an extra freezer so that I could take advantage of grocery sales and good deals. This has been helpful to stock up.

I meal plan and this allows for less waste in our groceries.

We are both financial kind of people who always paid our bills on time and never had real debt, but we actually started budgeting along the way and have found this has been the best way to keep track of our spending and keep us in line. We have always paid our credit cards off at the month end and saved and paid cash for our new to us cars.

It has been even more beneficial for me to be flexibile in my schedule as the kids have gotten older and become teenagers. There are many times during the week when the kids have an after school pickup time (because of extra curriculars) or evening activity drop off time that would not work if we were both still full time.

Good luck! I hope it all works for you!

 

[allthingsmickey]

I am currently doing it. I wish I had tried to figure out half or 3/4 time first. My suggestion would be to try those options before you walk away.

I have thought about that, but my job is not one I can do 1/2 or 3/4 time. I wish it was. I am a criminal prosecutor and if I am in trial, I'm there until we finish. I've been at work from 6 a.m. until midnight when I am in the middle of trial. So to go part time, I would have to change to another employer and part time legal positions are hard to come by, not to mention our state requirement of mandatory pro bono work. If you are practicing even part time, the state requires you take appointed cases and it's based on your experience. Since my experience is criminal law, I could easily get appointed to defend someone charged with murder, rape, etc. And then I would be back to being in trial. Each lawyer is appointed approximately 6 clients a year, which doesn't sound like much until you get stuck in court with one of them or spend 80 hours a week prepping for a trial.

So my next thought is to possibly make some extra money in some other manner. I currently bake everyone's birthday cakes (fondant, gum paste, etc.), and I embroider. My friends think I should get a home baker's license and sell my pound cakes, cookies, birthday cakes, cup cakes, etc. And perhaps that is an option. Right now, I am just trying to figure out how much we can save by changing some habits.

The obvious places are: 1) we eat out too much b/c we are both rushing home late

2) Clothing budget (no more expensive trial suits and shoes)
3) Gas and parking (no more downtown commute and parking)
4) Travel - Now, I am not talking about giving up Disney, but I can downgrade resorts, go less often or perhaps a shorter trips.
5) After school care -- $400/month
6) Summer camps - we'd still plan to let our daughter do a few, but currently we pay about $1000 month in the summer for summer camps

 

[Colleen27]

I found that just being home more saved money. When I left my career we had one toddler and a baby on the way, and between child care, the cost of my rather long commute, dry cleaning, our weekly cleaning lady, and way, way, way too much take-out on nights where neither DH nor I got home early enough to cook our "needs" dropped pretty significantly with one of us home. I do some freelance writing and proofreading, sell at a couple craft shows around the holidays, and have a garden that has shaved hundreds of dollars off our grocery bills too, but those are things done more out of personal interest than anything. Just being home to clean my own house, plan and cook meals, and look after the kids myself is where we saw the biggest savings.

 

[StephMK]

It sounds like you have options for other career possibilities. Would/could you consider freelance writing legal articles, being a consultant or college teaching as back up income sources? Could you take a leave of absence to see if it would really work for you? Would you be able to take some years off and go back if you wanted to?

As far as budgeting to stay at home, I looked at all of our bills and made cuts as needed. Dropped features we didn't need, changed carriers, and compared companies to find the best deals. It's much easier to shop the sales when you have time to look at the ads. Do you have car payments & would you still need that car?

You'll save on the gas, clothes, and lunch outings from working but just be careful not to use shopping and other spending as recreation if you're home more often.

Good luck! I enjoyed being at home but I also enjoyed finding PT ways to bring in some income.

 

[ariel71]

I'm not a lawyer so I don't know if this is feasible, but if there's a law school near you, could you look into teaching or tutoring? A friend who is a criminal defense attorney teaches a Trial Advocacy evening class once a week. I don't know if that would still subject you to the pro-bono requirements though.

 

[4luv2cdisney]

Well, I was going to tell you it is probably going to be easier than you think, because it was for me. However, I wasn't giving up an attorney's salary!

I found the expenses of working to be so much more than I had ever realized. Gas, food, clothes, convenience food and other items (because you just need what you need and don't have time or energy to go to 4 different stores for the best prices). As a SAHM, I had time to shop out the best deals for everything. I also took on small household remodeling projects (even made my own window treatments) myself - and enjoyed it! I felt like every dollar I saved us was my financial contribution to our household and it was kind of fun for me! Also I was happier and just found I needed less "stuff" in general. Even now that I work just part time I find that I do things or spend money on unnecessary things.

Take a hard look at your lifestyle / tastes. (Just examples - I have no idea if you already have or do the following): Would you miss buying designer handbags or similar items? Do you mind coloring your own hair and doing your own nails? Are you open to buying anything resale? Is driving an older car or giving up a "luxury" car an option? I consider myself a pretty simple, low maintenance person, so none of these things bothered me. They would be deal breakers for some. Who knows, maybe you will have plenty for all of these things even on one income. Some of my friends do!

Also, keep in mind, for many SAHM's it is only a temporary situation. Many of us end up back in the workforce and able to "go back" to our old lifestyle at some point ~ if we want to.

Put pen to paper and make a reasonable budget - leave some wiggle room - and see what you can come up with!

Good luck!

 

[brockash]

I have thought about that, but my job is not one I can do 1/2 or 3/4 time. I wish it was. I am a criminal prosecutor and if I am in trial, I'm there until we finish. I've been at work from 6 a.m. until midnight when I am in the middle of trial. So to go part time, I would have to change to another employer and part time legal positions are hard to come by, not to mention our state requirement of mandatory pro bono work. If you are practicing even part time, the state requires you take appointed cases and it's based on your experience. Since my experience is criminal law, I could easily get appointed to defend someone charged with murder, rape, etc. And then I would be back to being in trial. Each lawyer is appointed approximately 6 clients a year, which doesn't sound like much until you get stuck in court with one of them or spend 80 hours a week prepping for a trial.

So my next thought is to possibly make some extra money in some other manner. I currently bake everyone's birthday cakes (fondant, gum paste, etc.), and I embroider. My friends think I should get a home baker's license and sell my pound cakes, cookies, birthday cakes, cup cakes, etc. And perhaps that is an option. Right now, I am just trying to figure out how much we can save by changing some habits.

The obvious places are: 1) we eat out too much b/c we are both rushing home late

2) Clothing budget (no more expensive trial suits and shoes)
3) Gas and parking (no more downtown commute and parking)
4) Travel - Now, I am not talking about giving up Disney, but I can downgrade resorts, go less often or perhaps a shorter trips.
5) After school care -- $400/month
6) Summer camps - we'd still plan to let our daughter do a few, but currently we pay about $1000 month in the summer for summer camps

This may not be an option for you, but just thought I'd throw it out there...I used to be a paralegal and worked for the D.A.'s office. In one of my division's (each prosecutor had 2 court divisions) I had 2 prosecutor's that shared the 2 court divisions. Basically they each worked 2 or 3 days a week, so just an idea, if you could find another prosecutor that would want to do it, and your office would allow it.

 

[xCourxCorex]

Only thing I would add: after looking at your spending habits for the past several months, look at specifically what can be cut down (eating out, not buying food/other items on sale, impulse buys, morning coffees etc). Come up with a budget, then before making the switch, see what it's like for a couple of weeks on just your DH's paycheck. That way you have a realistic idea for the amount of income you'll be working with. In the meantime, save all your paychecks while you're still working (consider them "not there" as practice for when you aren't working.. maybe bank them towards emergency fund, pay down cars/mortgage/some other type of debt?)

I like the idea of using your baking skills to try and turn a profit! Worth a look into seeing how the process would be in your state (I'm sure there's some sort of health code to follow)... doing something you enjoy and getting some income on the side

 

[disykat]

The biggest thing is to start living on his salary only right now. Then cut as needed to do so. Meanwhile bank yours to build up an emergency fund. Don't spend a penny of it. If you can do that, you'll know you're ready.

 

[Caseheidi]

I made the change to SAHM almost 4 years ago, and don't regret it at all. Besides budget items (many good ones have already been mentioned) you also need to look at and think about how you would like it? Do you want to be home? How much will you miss your work? Are there other things you can do to give you the validation your employment did? What about your social needs. These are all things that factor into this change as well. I don't think you will find it hard to fill your time (somehow you never have enough time to get everything done when you SAH) but will you enjoy it. I have several friends who tried it without planning for the change in life style this is, and it was a difficult adjustment. Others (like me) planned for it and had smoother transitions. Look for opportunities to get out and use your skills as well as socialize.

Some other budget ideas that I don't think have been mentioned include
*checking out books from the library instead of buying
*adjust your car insurance as you will not be driving so many miles (can lower your rate)
*dropping cable/satellite and do Netflix or Hulu or something for lower price
*dropping land line or phone plan - adjust to need not want
* we also dropped our yard service and do it ourselves
* also dropped the company that sprayed monthly for bugs. Now we deal with them as we see them ourselves
* Plan groceries a month out and do big shopping once a month with weekly trips for fresh produce & milk (can really save buying in bulk and using sales)

 

[HeatherC]

I would also suggest taking a look at your mortgage situation. Can you pay it comfortably on dh salary? With the rates so low, maybe refinancing is an option to get your monthly payment lower? If you have a 15 year, maybe consider going to a 20 year. You could always continue making the extra payment to the principal each month, but not be tied into it.

Also..do you have any debt that can be paid off before you stop working? Credit cards? Student loans?

If you only have your mortgage at a reasonable payment, it will certainly be easier to go to one salary.

I guess I am suggesting that you get your monthly bills as low as reasonably possible and then live on just that one salary.

It can be done, just takes a bit of planning and juggling of expenses.

Best of luck to you!

 

[HeatherC]

Forgot to add..we have been living on one salary since I had my first kid 16 years ago. I do substitute teach part time, but only the last six years. We also live in Massachusetts which is a high cost of living area.

We have really been able to live comfortably without sacrificing most of the things people suggest cutting out like cable, cell phones, vacations, etc.

We have all of the above and vacation a couple times a year and my dh does not make a ton of money....town employee.

It really is a matter of keepimg expenses low so you have some leeway in your budget for savings...long and short term, as well as fun stuff.

For us, we find that sometimes the more money coming in, the more that goes out since we tend to not pay as much attention to it then. Does that make sense?

Just wanted to give you some hope that you don't have to be living a totally destitute life to stay home for a while.

Best of luck!

 

[bunny]

I know this may not be where your heart is, but I have you thought about hiring help instead. If you hired a housekeeper and/or nanny, it would alleviate a lot of your at home work. Is law something you can take a break from for a few years and then get back into? You may want to work again when your child is older but won't be able to get back into your field.

I have found on these boards when polled most mothers who quit working didn't make significantly more than their associated costs. I assume as attorney you do, so take that into account when asking for others' advice.

 

[pocomom]

You can save a lot by downsizing your life. But it will take a lot of adjusting. I know several ladies who have started cake/cookie businesses after leaving their career. It may work, but to make significant income from it you'll pretty much have to put in the same hours. I thought about it myself but here in PA you can't get your kitchen certified if you have pets at all, so I would have to rent commerical space... which kind of makes it not a work for home job!
The hardest part of staying home for me honestly is not financial, it is the isolation. It depends on the area you live in and whether you have a good support network, etc. But there are days when dh is working late or out of town and I realize I never spoke to another adult in person the whole day, and when I do, nine times out of ten it is about the kids. You can easily lose your identity. Of course we moved, and I had a baby at home, so it is a little different but still it can be hard being alone or with children all day long. That's why I would suggest staying active in your work network. If there are ocassional conferences, networking events etc. go to them, stay involved. Or consider teaching a class or two during the day at a local college/community college. Or just something Good Luck!

 

[bdcp]

I left my job in 1983 when my oldest DS was born and I never, ever regretted it. I was making about 30% of the household income and we did have to cut back some to do it, but it was sooooo worth it. At the time, we got rid of cable and I paid more attention when shopping. At that time, we rarely took vacations, so we weren't giving that up or adjusting that anyway. People just didn't take vacations then the way they do now. I stayed home for 14 years and then went back to work part time (25 hours/week) til they both graduated HS. I'm still part time (32 hours/week). As the boys got older, our (DH's) income increased and we did just fine.

What I don't get on here is all the posts saying "you won't be able to get back into your field later". Really? I know a lot of women who left careers/jobs to be SAHM moms and they've all been able to go back to the work force when they were ready. Did they lose time/some income? Sure, but so what? The time they spent as SAHM's they feel was more than worth it. But, they all do very well and most actually do catch up in a few years to their peers since most people stabilize in their career paths in their 40's anyway. Not everyone will be the CEO, CFO, Senior Executive and that's true for both men and women. Heck, both my sisters never quit work and I make as much if not more than them. One has more responsibility but she picked a field and employer that don't pay as much.

What some also forget is besides spending less in gas money, work clothes, eating lunches out, etc. is that you'll save on taxes also. You will be in a lower tax bracket and only reporting one income vs two. When my kids were small, there was a report done (US News and World Report I think) that said to break even a woman with two kids needed to be making about 28K which at the time was pretty good money. A lot of women working thinking they "need" the extra income are really only paying for the child care, commuting costs, work related expenses and not bringing home any more than if they weren't working.

 

[howlongtildisney]

I don't have too much advice because I'm in a similar situation. I am an attorney and DH also has a full-time job. The one thing I'm considering is moving to 30 hours a week once DH is done with his masters. Have you considered working for a nonprofit? That would probably involve switching sides for you, but nonprofits tend to be a bit more part-time friendly. Most states where the bar requires pro bono have an exemption for attorneys who work for non-profits.

 

[pocomom]

Just wanted to add, since staying home my dh's salary has increased to more than our preivous combined income in part because he is free now to focus only on working. When an opportunity comes up such as a new job further away or a project out of town, he is now available to take it without question becuase he knows I'm here to handle everything else. Obviously just my experience, but another point to your finances may not end up that different in the long run!