Thinking of leaving corporate world - budgeting advice from those who've managed it

[dreaming4disney]

I became a SAHM 16 years ago.(OMG! I cant believe it has been that long) I really wanted to be home for my kids. We have made many sacrifices along the way. It was hard to be home and isolated from adults when the kids were young. It was hard to live on one income and we have had a lot of medical problems all these years. So, it wasn't easy but more of a lifestyle choice.
I now work part time when my kids are at school(9-2) and summers off. It is basic office work with no benefits- but is a perfect fit for me -I can get to school sports and school activities with no problem and it is extra money for the household
I think it is a tough decision for anyone to make. I sometimes wonder what my career would be if I never stopped working. What my 401k would look like or how much more money I would have in the bank. But in 5 years my youngest will be getting ready for college and we will be empty nesters. I have no regrets.

Good luck with your decision!

 

[mom2alix]

I have thought about that, but my job is not one I can do 1/2 or 3/4 time. I wish it was. I am a criminal prosecutor and if I am in trial, I'm there until we finish. I've been at work from 6 a.m. until midnight when I am in the middle of trial. So to go part time, I would have to change to another employer and part time legal positions are hard to come by, not to mention our state requirement of mandatory pro bono work. If you are practicing even part time, the state requires you take appointed cases and it's based on your experience. Since my experience is criminal law, I could easily get appointed to defend someone charged with murder, rape, etc. And then I would be back to being in trial. Each lawyer is appointed approximately 6 clients a year, which doesn't sound like much until you get stuck in court with one of them or spend 80 hours a week prepping for a trial.

So my next thought is to possibly make some extra money in some other manner. I currently bake everyone's birthday cakes (fondant, gum paste, etc.), and I embroider. My friends think I should get a home baker's license and sell my pound cakes, cookies, birthday cakes, cup cakes, etc. And perhaps that is an option. Right now, I am just trying to figure out how much we can save by changing some habits.

The obvious places are: 1) we eat out too much b/c we are both rushing home late

2) Clothing budget (no more expensive trial suits and shoes)
3) Gas and parking (no more downtown commute and parking)
4) Travel - Now, I am not talking about giving up Disney, but I can downgrade resorts, go less often or perhaps a shorter trips.
5) After school care -- $400/month
6) Summer camps - we'd still plan to let our daughter do a few, but currently we pay about $1000 month in the summer for summer camps

Another idea for you - my friend was a corporate attorney and she now works part time teaching para legal classes at a couple of local colleges as an adjunct instructor. I started out teaching business classes adjunct and now have a full time instructor position. Teaching at the college level can be a great way to have flexibility in your schedule and still keep your foot in your profession. Good luck!

 

[bumbershoot]

My husband makes enough that we should be fine financially....

I'm going to take you at your word here. Others aren't, but you said it so I'll believe it.

My DH's job is requiring more travel and having both of us working full time is becoming difficult to manage logistically.

I cannot even imagine. My DH travels for work now, and when I even think about having a job and dealing with him being gone like he is, it freaks me out.


I wasn't coming from an attorney's salary, not even a criminal prosecutor's salary (which probably isn't as high as, say, my SIL's who is a trademark law attorney at a top 10 international firm) (I'm not saying that in a negative way, but just trying to be realistic about where the OP's finances are), but we found that we saved TONS by me being home than when I was working. When I was working we made about the same, and when I quit obviously that total was cut in half, but we stopped throwing money out the window and had almost no changes. Now, 10 years after I quit and DH asked if I would like to stay home, we are doing SO much better than we could have imagined.


Others have covered the "be sure to account for this" stuff pretty well, so I just want to give you my support.

Oh and I have an advanced degree and I could make people call me doctor if I felt like it, but I have never once been BORED by my son. He is just about the most fascinating human I've ever met (most kids are, actually), and while I might be bored with myself (which happened well before I stopped working), I've never felt like I'm not using my brain by being with him. Of course, homeschooling helps, I imagine, but even teaching a new human the ABCs or how to tie shoes is pretty stinkin' fun. (if it weren't fun and interesting to do those things, teachers and daycare workers would be bored out of their skulls, wouldn't they?)

 

[RookieLady]

I am a litigator. I agree you don't litigate part time. I have a number of friends that went "part time" and came back to full practice. One did appellate work at home. She advertised heavily in legal journals and came to daytime bar meetings regularly. Her kids are grown and now she's a judge. The joy of appellate work is it's mostly paper and you can do it when you have time at home. I had another that owned her own law practice, which meant she never saw her family. She has obtained a job as an assistant clerk of court, adjudicating special proceedings, where she works 9-5, with state benefits. A couple have become mediators, where you choose your hours and there's never homework. Until you get a reputation, you won't have work, but folks start out on the court appointed list and develop from there. Still others changed there practice. One lady went from a heavy pi practice and now does wills. She has a thriving business, but with that kind of work, you can control better when you do it, instead of having to be present and ready for a judge and jury. Good luck with whatever you decide.

 

[tinker&belle]

OP, I quit my job 4 years ago and have never looked back. I made less than 30K so it was not as hard of a decision. Now that we are moving into the Elementary years from the Nursery School years I am hoping to work Part time. The women I know who are the happiest seem to work part time once their children are in school. Maybe you could work in a different capacity in your field? If so you would have an easier time with re-entry at a later point as well. Best of luck with your decision.

 

[StitchesGr8Fan]

Only one or two people have mentioned retirement. If you stop working, can you save enough of your husbands income to pay for retirement and retirement healthcare costs? If you save enough for retirement, can you still afford your living expenses? Retirement planning today is very different than it was 20 years ago. There is no one you can count on for support but you. Not the government, not your employer. And you can't finance your retirement.

 

[Ladcassidy]

I litigate part time, so it can be done. I was a partner in a top notch firm for years. Then I had kids. Now I work on a much reduced schedule. I work 9-5 most days, but if I want to go to the preschool mothers coffee, I go without a second thought.

 

[disykat]

While that is common advice, I'm not really sure it is good advice... .

I guess I thought it was pretty obvious that excluded the specific expenses associated with working.

 

[disykat]

Another thing I will add that many of my current SAHM friends have found and I've found as well. I find this particularly sad, but our society really has changed to the point where SAHMs often are simply not respected. People don't hire people they don't respect.

It makes me sad, but it is a reality you may face.

 

[HeyIt'sMe]

My DH & I both work; he's an Operations Manager and I am an Accounting Director. We have one DD (a sophomore in high school). My DH has gotten some substantial raises over the last few years and he now makes alone what we made combined in 2004 and we don't have the debt we used to have back then. Oh how I would love to quit my job or work part-time. But, to us that's thinking too short-term. With both of us working we can put alot of money away in our retirement accounts, savings accounts, and DD's college fund. Sure, with DH's salary alone we could pay the bills today. But with both of our salaries we can pay the bills today and ensure that we can pay them in the future too.

OP ~ good luck with your decision.

 

[kkmcan]

I have thought about that, but my job is not one I can do 1/2 or 3/4 time. I wish it was. I am a criminal prosecutor and if I am in trial, I'm there until we finish. I've been at work from 6 a.m. until midnight when I am in the middle of trial. So to go part time, I would have to change to another employer and part time legal positions are hard to come by, not to mention our state requirement of mandatory pro bono work. If you are practicing even part time, the state requires you take appointed cases and it's based on your experience. Since my experience is criminal law, I could easily get appointed to defend someone charged with murder, rape, etc. And then I would be back to being in trial. Each lawyer is appointed approximately 6 clients a year, which doesn't sound like much until you get stuck in court with one of them or spend 80 hours a week prepping for a trial.

So my next thought is to possibly make some extra money in some other manner. I currently bake everyone's birthday cakes (fondant, gum paste, etc.), and I embroider. My friends think I should get a home baker's license and sell my pound cakes, cookies, birthday cakes, cup cakes, etc. And perhaps that is an option. Right now, I am just trying to figure out how much we can save by changing some habits.

The obvious places are: 1) we eat out too much b/c we are both rushing home late

2) Clothing budget (no more expensive trial suits and shoes)
3) Gas and parking (no more downtown commute and parking)
4) Travel - Now, I am not talking about giving up Disney, but I can downgrade resorts, go less often or perhaps a shorter trips.
5) After school care -- $400/month
6) Summer camps - we'd still plan to let our daughter do a few, but currently we pay about $1000 month in the summer for summer camps

WOW! Sounds like you are going to cut out a huge portion of expenses just from not working! Did you ever calculate take home pay after all those expenses.... maybe its not as much as you think. Then subtract the amount you spend a week on eating out and see what that is.

When I quit to stay at home, I couponed and shopped sales, we ate at home way more and I started selling on ebay just to make some fun money. I also found cheap/free places to take my preschool/toddler aged kids to- library, park, zoo, swimming, etc.

 

[Ginny Favers]

We went to a one-income family when I lost my job right before the birth of our second. It was different, though, because I had the income from my writing (however, it fluctuates greatly, so I could never count on it).

However, I went back to work a year and a half ago, and I am SO HAPPY with that decision. Being a SAHM wasn't for me. Constantly worrying about finances was depressing, seeing friends going on vacations that I couldn't go on, etc. etc. It really made me appreciate the working life and a steady paycheck.

I used to be the same way with getting household chores done and always seemed to be forgetting school events for my kids. I, too, don't have any family or friends nearby to chip in. Sometimes I do get jealous of the free time others seem to have to volunteer for school events. But while at first many things might fall through the cracks, I've found that eventually I have gotten used to it and developed a nice little system. I keep an organized calendar with things I need to remember for school, I have a schedule of what lunches need to be made and what needs to be done, and I rarely forget anything. No, I can't help out as much as SAHMs, but I do what I can.

One of the things that makes me proudest is my ability to juggle a full-time job, my part-time job, and my family's busy schedule. Although I don't have a lot of free time, it's a very freeing feeling to be financially secure and dependent on no one.

 

[QVCshopper]

I have not read all of the posts, but I went from corporate writer to SAHM. But, right as I made the switch, I had applied for a part-time position at another company. That was almost 7 years ago, and I'm still there. I work at night after dinner, about 15-20 hours a week. I put in 50% of my salary into the 401k to make up for lost retirement (I wasn't eligible at first) and we still do Roth IRA contributions.

Anyway, when we thought about it, we lived on my husband's salary along or six months or so, and saved my salary. We did fine without touching my income, so eventually I resigned. You really can save a fortune when you try, and working full-time costs a lot, especially when factoring in multiple daycare bills. Sure, maybe I'm losing out some money, but do I regret it one bit? No way!

 

[eyor44]

OP, thank you for starting this thread. I am seriously considering quitting and I have been here for 22 years. Most days I am okay with the decision and then I think about this:

With both of us working we can put alot of money away in our retirement accounts, savings accounts, and DD's college fund. Sure, with DH's salary alone we could pay the bills today. But with both of our salaries we can pay the bills today and ensure that we can pay them in the future too.

I have been the sole provider before with a small child, so not having a job also bothers me because of the what-ifs. Yes, there are measures I can take to ensure I have a cushion, but still........ I am dealing with health issues and feel I can not give 100% to my job any more and part-time here really isn't an option. They need a full time person. I am struggling but promised DH to make a definite decision by the end of Summer.

Thanks again for the thread. Reading everyone's responses is giving me some stuff to think about.

 

[bdcp]

The OP is an attorney. I will assume she is making considerably more than 28K. That doesn't mean she can't survive on her husband's income but that cutting out cable and couponing shopping isn't going to make up for the lost income. Also I would assume you can't take a break from the legal field for 10 to 15 years and then just jump back in. Lastly the OP spent 7 years in higher education and possibly over a hundred thousand earning her degree. This is significantly different than most careers.

I know she's an attorney. I read her post. You totally and completely missed the point of my post. I said some of the things I DID and btw, that didn't make up for my income either, but we did decide what was important and not important and spent differently to do what we felt was absolutely the best for our boys. The 28K I was quoting was about 25 years ago (note I never said now). At that time, that's what they were using as a break even point. I'm positive it's a lot more than that now.

I'm also amazed at the number of women who mention being "isolated" from adults. Really? I was never isolated. I found two mom's groups when my children were babies and made friends there. I went looking for them and didn't wait for them to find me. When my kids were in elementary school I volunteered there several days a week and went on most field trips. I also volunteered at our church office one day a week as well as worked with our church moms group. What I always hated was my working sister who told my mom "I couldn't stay home all day". Well, I rarely stayed home all day. Pretty much only when someone was sick or the weather was bad. We went to museums, zoos, farms, play dates, parks, etc. It actually was the best time of my life.

 

[edk35]

Yes it can be done. I haven't read everyone's replies but you will probably realize really fast that YOU SPEND A LOT of money that you can easily cut back on. I work part time but basically never went back to full time teaching after having our three kids. My husband has ALWAYS traveled a lot. Matter of fact...after 24 years of marriage...we can't come up with ONE year he was here from start to finish. He has been gone for months on end. SO.....we decided that it was better for all concerned...for me to be a SAHM. I have spent many years over the course of our marriage not working much..... but I have been working part time the past 11. I started substitute teaching when our youngest got into kindergarten. That way I was always on his schedule. I could work when I wanted and if we had family in town or one of our kids was sick...I always had that flexibility. My parents live far away and so do his. We have never had family close to us. Good Luck....I am sure you won't look back and regret it.

 

[allthingsmickey]

Thanks for all of the replies. You have all given me lots of good advice and lots to think about.

1) We have an appt. with our financial advisor to go over our retirement portfolio and how much we need to be putting aside.

2) I am looking to see what I can find in terms of part time work teaching at one of the local colleges, tech schools or law school. I have been approached to do this before when I was doing big firm work and I recall the pay wasn't great, but it would keep me working in the field and have flexibility. I am also looking to see if there is any other part time work in the field that might still e exempt from the pro-bono requirements. It's a little difficult to put out feelers without it getting out that I am considering leaving, but I'm determined to figure out something.

3) I put together a spread sheet of our fixed monthly expenses to determine exactly what we will have left over each month.

4) My last paycheck is in the savings account and the plan is to keep putting them in there until we make the final decision.

The good thing on this timing is that DH's recently got a pretty decent increase in salary so the income loss won't be as much of a hit since we haven't gotten used to spending based on his new income level.

In the end, we have decided as a family that we want our daughter to have time with family instead of hired help all the time. Thank you all for the responses and insight.

 

[diznee25]

I'm considering giving up my job to be a SAHM, Disney obsesser, crafter, baker, homemaker, etc. My DH's job is requiring more travel and having both of us working full time is becoming difficult to manage logistically.

My husband makes enough that we should be fine financially, but we will have to change some spending habits. So for those of you who have taken the plunge from 2 incomes to 1, what ways have you found to save money? Any tips appreciated.

Before I left the corporate world, we started putting my paychecks into our savings account. This was a test to see if we could live without it. We found that we could, but it was required that we changed our spending habits.

Prior to quitting, we made a ton of money. We ate out, bought anything we wanted on a whim. Once we just brought in one paycheck, we found that we needed to budget, and plan ahead for "fun" money.

I would budget the necessities, keep a chunk to put into savings, and the remainder would be our "fun" budget. Sure, there were some months when the most we could afford was RedBox, because emergencies came up, but life still happens, even on 1 paycheck!

After 2 years of not working, I am proud to say that our "fun" budget is almost what it used to be on 2 incomes. But I've become more savvy with saving on groceries, and knowing where to find the deals for fun stuff, like coupons for restaurants, movie theaters, etc.

This whole experience of leaving the corporate world, and learning that it is possible to survive on one income, has been liberating for me! And in doing so, I have now discovered that I want to work from home. I'll be working as an assistant, first to my FIL, but I hope to expand and take on more clients soon!

 

[edk35]

OP, I quit my job 4 years ago and have never looked back. I made less than 30K so it was not as hard of a decision. Now that we are moving into the Elementary years from the Nursery School years I am hoping to work Part time. The women I know who are the happiest seem to work part time once their children are in school. Maybe you could work in a different capacity in your field? If so you would have an easier time with re-entry at a later point as well. Best of luck with your decision.

I agree. I am a part time worker and I love the flexibility. I know not everyone can do, this but it has worked for us. You just have to make sacrifices along the way. We don't have the nicest/biggest house but I would take that over working 40+ hours a week and having a super nice/fancy home. I agree with the poster that said to take 6 months and live off her husband's income. That is a great suggestion.

 

[edk35]

Thanks for all of the replies. You have all given me lots of good advice and lots to think about.

1) We have an appt. with our financial advisor to go over our retirement portfolio and how much we need to be putting aside.

2) I am looking to see what I can find in terms of part time work teaching at one of the local colleges, tech schools or law school. I have been approached to do this before when I was doing big firm work and I recall the pay wasn't great, but it would keep me working in the field and have flexibility. I am also looking to see if there is any other part time work in the field that might still e exempt from the pro-bono requirements. It's a little difficult to put out feelers without it getting out that I am considering leaving, but I'm determined to figure out something.

3) I put together a spread sheet of our fixed monthly expenses to determine exactly what we will have left over each month.

4) My last paycheck is in the savings account and the plan is to keep putting them in there until we make the final decision.

The good thing on this timing is that DH's recently got a pretty decent increase in salary so the income loss won't be as much of a hit since we haven't gotten used to spending based on his new income level.

In the end, we have decided as a family that we want our daughter to have time with family instead of hired help all the time. Thank you all for the responses and insight.