Things you believed BEFORE you had kids

[Mrs. Charming]

Before I had kids I believed Barney, Teletubbies and Baby Eisntien videos where a mindless waist of time sent too us by the devil to rot our kids brains. Now I know they are a great blessing that allowed me to wash , get dressed and on a really good day put on some mascara!

Amen, sista! It's a miracle if I get to shower AND dry my hair!

Oh, and I can't go to the bathroom by myself. At one point, DD was climbing into my pulled-down panties while I did my business. Thankfully that was only a passing phase!

 

[luvmy3jewels]

Before I had kids, I thought that having children brought couples closer. Now I know that after having kids you have to work harder to maintain a close relationship with your spouse. Dh and I have 3 (fairly young) children, and a lot of time and energy go into giving them the time and attention that they need. It is really easy at the end of the day to get the kids in bed and crash ourselves, without ever really having a serious conversation with each other. DH and I try to occassionally have a date night (or even a quick getaway for the two of us). We've also discovered that having a walk-in closet sometimes allow us a few minutes of "quality" alone time

I once read (probably on this board) that having a good relationship with my dh would be one of the best gifts that I can give my children. I'm a strong believer in this sentiment, but realize that when you have kids it may not always come easy!

 

[tzolkin]

Seems no one wants me until I close the door to the bathroom.

I haven't bothered to close the door for years.


A slight variation...

"something I believed before I had my second child"
-- that my first child's perfect behavior was the result of my fabulous parenting skills

 

[Kitty 34]

Before kids......

I thought I would never have a problem putting my child to bed.

I truly believed only healthy food would enter my child's mouth.

I thought that at 6 weeks they slept thru the night like the books said.

and the biggie.......I truly thought that at 18, they moved out for good.

 

[WeLoveLilo05]

Before I had Kids

I couldnt figure out why parents wouldnt just stop shopping and leave with the kid when they were acting up. Now I know its because youve been dreading taking said child to store for weeks and have no food left in the house

That ADHD was a crutch and Id never medicate my child ( dd has primarily inattentive adhd and is on adderall for her sake and mine)

That my dd would NEVER wear the color pink, its her favorite color

That my kids would be potty trained by the age of 2. DD trained right around 3 and we are still working on getting ds to poop on the potty ( welcoming all suggestions however please dont be offended if i say weve done it already)

My kids would not be picky eaters, ( i dont make seperate meals but they can make pbj's if so desired)

My kids would be great at sports ( my dd is the most uncooridinated, non competitive person I know)

laughing so hard at your 1st one, its so true haha.
And just wanted to say GL with the potty training, DD was peeing on the potty for over a year and FINALLY pooped on the potty when she was 5!!! I was getting nervous about her going to school (she didn't make cut off this year so she'll be in there next year), IDK, one day she just decided she was going to do it all by herself.

I never thought that I would NEED a vacation every year, like I NEED air,water, and food. Seriously, if I didn't get our Disney vacation once a year I would probably lose my sanity.

 

[Acklander]

I remember when pregnant with my 2nd child I had to keep reminding myself that I could never let this new child know that my first son was my favorite. I guess I didn't realize that I could love them both completely LOL

 

[rainydayplay]

I will admit, I still will not let my kids go out in public with dirty hands, face, clothes, snotty nose or crazy hair. THAT still drives me insane.

My DD gave herself a haircut a year or so ago, cuting the hair just around her face. (The rest of it is to her hips.) Ever since then it seems, it doesn't matter what I do to her hair...5 minutes after it's done, it looks like a comb or brush has never touched it in her entire life! One morning when I was driving her to the bus stop, she swore she was cold and covered up completely with the blanket in the car. 5 minutes later, it's half out of the ponytail holder and sticking out in every direction, with no time or means to fix it.

lol I just want some privacy when I used the potty!
And of course I'd like some sleep.

Sleep's not ever really been too much of a problem, but I gave up even trying to close the bathroom door so I didn't have to listen to the pounding and crying on the other side.

and the biggie.......I truly thought that at 18, they moved out for good.

Kitty...I think my mother feels you on that one. Here I creep ever closer to 30..with a Master's degree and a job that pays better than what she makes, but between day care and student loans, etc., I still have to live at home. (I just tell everyone I'm pathetic...)

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I have nothing witty to include--my life is a big "before and after" lifetime movie.

But a funny funny thing---

The first night home from the hospital--I actually believed that I woudl sleep through baby's feeding time and she'd starve. (I sleep like a rock!) I set not one, but TWO alarm clocks. I slept on the couch with her near by. (have no idea why!)

Much to my surprise---seh woke up before that first alarm ever went off.

And yes--my DH "told me so".

 

[PrincessBelle39]

I had so much trouble sleeping at the end of my pregnancy for dd1. I remember thinking, 'I can't wait for this baby to come out so I can get a full nights sleep.'
What was I thinking? DD is now nearly 8 and I haven't had a full nights sleep since she was born.

 

[Mermaid02]

I remember when pregnant with my 2nd child I had to keep reminding myself that I could never let this new child know that my first son was my favorite. I guess I didn't realize that I could love them both completely LOL

I remember holding my newborn daughter thinking, "I can never have another baby because I will NEVER love another one as much as I do her...."

 

[Ceila]

Before I had my son, I believed I knew what it was like to completely and truly love another human being.

Don't get me wrong, I love DH, but the way I feel about my son is amazing.

So true! I can't believe the depths of the love you have for your children. It's amazing and at the same time exhausting!

I also thought that I'd never be one of those parents who just runs from one activity to another. My sister and I were close in age and usually had the same activities, so our mom had it a bit easier! With two kids with completely different interests, I need a taxi sign for my car!

 

[design_mom]

Before I had kids I believed that their behavior was a reflection on their parenting. Boy did my oldest force me to eat crow on that one. I don't blame myself for his behavior problems growing up, and on the flip side I don't take credit for my daughter being so well behaved.

They are who they are. All you can do is guide them and give appropriate punishments and rewards and be consistent.

A slight variation...

"something I believed before I had my second child"
-- that my first child's perfect behavior was the result of my fabulous parenting skills

Amen! My first is an easy child. I really tried not to pat myself on the back too much because he was so good (and SIL's child ran her ragged). But, when #2 came along, I have realized most of their behavior is personality-based. I never realized how different two kids could be! (DD and my nephew are two peas in a pod. My SIL just laughs.)

ETA: Before DH and I had our son, I thought it would be easy disciplining. Boy was I wrong (major Mommy melt-downs)! DS was born very stronged willed. It lasted from the time he was born until the age of 6. Since turning 7 last year, he's so different and I very rarely need to discipline him now. He's growing up and maturing

DD turns 6 next month. Maybe there's hope for her yet. I can hold out another year!

 

[Krazy 4 da Mouse]

I remember holding my newborn daughter thinking, "I can never have another baby because I will NEVER love another one as much as I do her...."

I had the same thought. A very wise man that I worked for at the time told me "You will think that you can't love another baby like you love this one, but you can. You will love this baby equally as much but in a different way." At the time it didn't make much sense, but now I get it! I love both my kids completely and can't imagine my life without either of them.

Before I had kids I thought....Car rider line at school looks like fun!!! JK
I did think potty training can't be that hard. Boy, was I wrong. I was afraid my son would pack diapers in his backpack for school.

 

[Mickeypooh99]

Before I had kids I thought the "What to expect the first year" was a great baby manual. After my DS was born I realized he had never read that book.

I also said I would never let my kids eat in the car.

I would still be able to keep my house as clean as I did before kids.

Before my 2nd DS was born just 12 months later I thought he would be a little carbon copy of 1st DS. They couldn't be more different in looks and personality!

 

[FINFAN]

before I had kids I thought High School was relatively easy, and they would be the greatest years of my kids lives. Boy was I wrong.
A lot has changed on the educational front in 30 years, and not for the better.
I also thought I would be able to pay for their college without them needing any loans

 

[Minnesota!]

My DD gave herself a haircut a year or so ago, cuting the hair just around her face. (The rest of it is to her hips.) Ever since then it seems, it doesn't matter what I do to her hair...5 minutes after it's done, it looks like a comb or brush has never touched it in her entire life! One morning when I was driving her to the bus stop, she swore she was cold and covered up completely with the blanket in the car. 5 minutes later, it's half out of the ponytail holder and sticking out in every direction, with no time or means to fix it.
QUOTE]

The crazy hair on other kids doesn't bug me - it;'s on MY kids.

However, the dirty, snotty faces and dirty clothes on other kids bugs me just as much as if it were my kid, though!

My younger son - he's 3 - has such gorgeous hair and I LOOOOVE how he looks with it a little longer/shaggier (looks like a hockey player!) but since it's so long now (just on top and it kind of flops over his eyes), it can get really shaggy really quick. So yeah, yesterday he would out and about sporting quite the "do since I didn't brush it right away after his bath and it dried all funny!

 

[mykidsand_i]

Before I had kids, I believed that my life was busy.

I still have a friend who says she's busy ALL OF THE TIME- she works 2 days a week, volunteers one day a week and she has NO KIDS- I tell her she doesn't know what busy is until she has kids!

 

[smkiya]

Before I had kids I believed that I would never answer my kids nonstop "Mom, mom, mom" with WHAT??!! In that crabby, exasperated voice that was just like my mom's.........yeah, I do that a lot and I sound exactly like her

LMAO... I know!

 

[Disneyglobegirl]

I remember when pregnant with my 2nd child I had to keep reminding myself that I could never let this new child know that my first son was my favorite. I guess I didn't realize that I could love them both completely LOL

LOL- I did the same thing

I have also learned that I will always love my children but they will go through stages sometimes were I don't really like them all that much for example now that my first child is about to turn 16 he is being a little turd about not getting a car for his Bday He has been told over and over for the past couple of years that he will not get a car until he can help pay for the car, gas and insurance - guess he thought we were joking. The turd actually suggested that if I went back to work fulltime that we would be able to afford to get him a car At this point he will be lucky if he gets to drive one of our cars until he gets over that entitlement attitude.

 

[CaliforniaDreamin]

Before I was a parent, ok....here is a list. I was 20 when I had my first DD16

-I thought babies would be so fun to play with. All the time.
-I thought that people would support me and not threaten me (Ok, you deserve a backstory, when Haley was an infant, our first outing was to Kmart. Everything was fine until she woke up and was hungry. Like, immediately hungry. Neither one of my kids would take a pacifier or a bottle. So I have picked her up, abandoned my shopping cart, she is red faced and screaming bloody murder and I'm running to my car to breast feed her. On my way out, I over heard an old lady say "I ought to jerk a knot in that womans head for letting that baby cry". I cried for hours over that one. I was young and SO proud that I breastfed..please don't take this as a debate. But this
was in the early 90's and breastfeeding hadn't really made a comeback yet.)
-Like another poster, I thought my daughters and I would be best friends and we would tell secrets and make rice krispie treats and do each others hair. I didn't have a mom from the age of 8 on, so it was really important that I have an amazing mother-daughter relationship. But in reality, about 90% of the time, I am the enemy. They are daddys girls.
-I never considered that as long as I lived, I would always have an overwhelming, all-consuming fear that they would die before me. Everytime I see a story about a child dying, it breaks my heart and scares me at the same time. When I think about how evil the world is, I wish I had never had them. That sounds really bad....I just worry so much. I don't want them to ever suffer or feel pain. I'm so scared. I lost about 6 good friends from the time I was in 4th grade until I was about 24. One of them was "the one" in high school. I was so in love with him, but he found someone else. She got pregnant with twins, they got married and at age 25 he was killed at work. My heart still breaks when I think about him. But it's nothing compared to the fear of losing a child. No matter how old they are.