Things that make you shake your head!

[dsnymom2003]

OP here. I think some clarification needs to be made before I get the judge not lest ye be judged garbage! First in North Carolina there are two different cards for food stamps and child support/unemployment. The food stamps card is very distinctive and you have to tell the cashier that you are using "EBT" before you swipe the card. I know all of this because my sister is on food stamps and gets child support and unemployment! I am not downing this couple because they are on food stamps. I live in a poor county and there are a lot of people that need help here. Secondly, I am not judging without the full facts. Like I said in my original post-I talked to this woman in the candy aisle for several mins! She told me all about the big party she was throwing for her FREINDS! Not her children and not because someone was sick. She said she just felt like having a party! Don't try to push it off as they are just trying to have a "normal" life! That is partly what is wrong with generational poverty. Everyone just wants to give them a normal life! Normal is getting a job, not having children unless you can take care of them and taking care of the responsibilities of everyday life! I know that everyone falls on hard times and I am totally with helping your fellow man but, when do the handouts end? When are we as a country going to say enough is enough and educate people? When are these children going taught that you work for what you get? It has to end somewhere

 

[beansmom]

i'm ready to say 'enough is enough'...lock the thread already.

 

[tiggerplus5]

I don't see why the government can't limit what is purchased with the SNAP-Ed (Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program, and Ed. is for Education) program. It's supposed to be a SUPPLEMENT to your food budget. No one is telling you that you can't buy junk food. Just no junk food with my tax dollars. Use the SNAP program for healthy foods and use the rest of your food budget to by pepsi or pudding or chips. In reality, can the system be programmed that way? I don't know the answer to that.

 

[pampam]

We have a food bank here. One woman returned a bag of rice, explaining it was too hard for her children to eat.

On the other hand, at least she returned it instead of throwing it out.

I think a lot of these people need lessons on how to manage financially, or even basic cooking lessons

 

[mickaholic4077]

frankly, we are looking at 5 minutes of that person's entire life. Do you know ANYTHING about them?

Two phrases come to mind:

"judge not, lest ye be judged" and MYOB.

Thank you!!

 

[DMRick]

Again, it's a few minutes in an aisle, not enoughh time for full facts. You have no idea why she had food stamps. Perhaps she already used her cash for the actual food for the month. Perhaps she is a great shopper and over the months had money left, and her friends were all bringing lots of regular food to feed them, and she was buying candy part. Maybe the party was to put together candy bags for the less fortunate. Maybe her friends were all bringing their children and she was trying to put on a safe Halloween. How would you know all of this unless you questioned her in minute detail. I would need a lot more than a few minutes in an aisle to judge as you and others have. Heck, I doubt I could have remembered everything said in a food aisle in passing by the time we got to the register, and then remember to note how she was paying.

You also have no idea if she had a job or not, if when she had her children she could afford them but now fell on hard times. Heck, you don't even know if she's been sick all year and her friends have been helping her and now she is repaying them with a celebration party. How would you know all of this in a few minutes while grocery shopping. Lots of guessing/judging there.

Secondly, I am not judging without the full facts. Like I said in my original post-I talked to this woman in the candy aisle for several mins! She told me all about the big party she was throwing for her FREINDS! Not her children and not because someone was sick. She said she just felt like having a party! Don't try to push it off as they are just trying to have a "normal" life! That is partly what is wrong with generational poverty. Everyone just wants to give them a normal life! Normal is getting a job, not having children unless you can take care of them and taking care of the responsibilities of everyday life!

 

[jodifla]

Again, it's a few minutes in an aisle, not enoughh time for full facts. You have no idea why she had food stamps. Perhaps she already used her cash for the actual food for the month. Perhaps she is a great shopper and over the months had money left, and her friends were all bringing lots of regular food to feed them, and she was buying candy part. Maybe the party was to put together candy bags for the less fortunate. Maybe her friends were all bringing their children and she was trying to put on a safe Halloween. How would you know all of this unless you questioned her in minute detail. I would need a lot more than a few minutes in an aisle to judge as you and others have. Heck, I doubt I could have remembered everything said in a food aisle in passing by the time we got to the register, and then remember to note how she was paying.

You also have no idea if she had a job or not, if when she had her children she could afford them but now fell on hard times. Heck, you don't even know if she's been sick all year and her friends have been helping her and now she is repaying them with a celebration party. How would you know all of this in a few minutes while grocery shopping. Lots of guessing/judging there.

Great post. It's amazing the scorecard some people try to keep.

 

[goodfood4ursoul]

The reason WIC works is that it is a very limited program: milk, cheese, cereal,juice, peanut butter. There are no fresh fruits, fresh veggies (or even canned/frozen fruits or veggies) or meats. It is not a complete diet...


Actually, the WIC program has changed.
http://www.fns.usda.gov/wic/benefitsandservices/Snapshot-WIC-Children-WomenFoodPkgs.pdf

Moms and kids now get fruits and veggies and peanut butter and dry beans which count as part of the Meat, Beans, and Nut Group.

But I do agree with you that WIC is meant to supplement diets so that diseases that are caused by malnutrition do not develop in children.
This saves our society a lot in health care costs down the road.



As for "sugary" items, it is such a slippery slope. So, no sodas, candy or cookies. How about a cake mix? What about a bag of sugar and chocolate chips? What about the choice between "regular" applesauce that has sugar added and "natural" that does not. Where do you draw the line and who gets to draw it?

At some point people need to be responsible for themselves.

I work with these people everyday. The ones who will be on public assistance for the rest of their lives. Yes, their food stamps are often twice my monthly grocery budget. I am so glad not to be in their shoes.

I agree with you about personal responsibility and where to draw the line.
This is just sad and there are no easy answers.
Just think of the people on food stamps who only get $16 a month

We have a food bank here. One woman returned a bag of rice, explaining it was too hard for her children to eat.

On the other hand, at least she returned it instead of throwing it out.

I think a lot of these people need lessons on how to manage financially, or even basic cooking lessons

The lessons you refer to are available for free to all who qualify for food stamps and wic.
See my post on page 4 for more info. post #55

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=2573949&page=4

 

[rachdd]

I get it... SADLY others don't! Without passing "judgement" and not even using the information the OP received from the lady, I KNOW that I work everyday and pay taxes and right now I don't have enough money to go and buy $174 worth of candy for a party but your right... I hope she has a great party, and her friends have a great time... I will be working! Never mind if she "saved" some of her food stamps and was able to buy the candy with her "savings" I mean the government gives her that much so why shouldn't she WASTE what she has saved... I mean I am still working so she will have plenty next month!! I mean people without jobs who need government assistance need to throw parties too... right???

RIDICULOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[jandel]

"That is partly what is wrong with generational poverty. Everyone just wants to give them a normal life! Normal is getting a job, not having children unless you can take care of them and taking care of the responsibilities of everyday life! I know that everyone falls on hard times and I am totally with helping your fellow man but, when do the handouts end? When are we as a country going to say enough is enough and educate people? When are these children going taught that you work for what you get? It has to end somewhere"


Thank you, thank you, thank you Could not have said it better myself!

 

[zscfan]

Working in a retail store, I see situations like this everyday. Women coming in with iphones, Coach purses and French manicures whipping out an EBT card.

But equally as bad is my co-worker, who has all 4 of her kids on Medicaid when she could add them to her work insurance plan for less than $100 a month and has a $550 car payment.

 

[DMRick]

Do you think that people that get food stamps are only those who don't work? And the person that only gets $16, do you not think there is a reason for that, like they are making too much money to qualify for more, or have less children?

Do you think if she just lets the food stamps lay there that she will continue to qualify for them? Of course she could never have just been a careful shopper..she's darned if she buys expensive stuff and spends it all, and darned if she buys cheap stuff and has stamps left over.

Do you not think that it's not just your tax dollars paying for them, but mine too?

Do you think that those of us saying this is judging don't want ways to stop the cheating? With what the OP wrote, I have no idea if this person was cheating. I just know what I went through with my now deceased parents and the judging I got to hear every single time I used their food stamps (and oh my, did my shopping at the same time, and I paid cash for the cat food and steaks..can you imagine the judging that went on there..I see there is even juding about those types of purchased here, again having no idea of the persons background?).
Oh yeah, I 'get' it. You can't afford to buy what she was buying (and having no idea how or why), so shame on her. People on food stamps should buy only cheap stuff, and preferable in a special store (and maybe just store brands) that only has what we (we as in those who pay the taxes, because for sure the person in the OP's story has most likely never worked or paid taxes in their life) judge to he healthy food, built with my tax dollars....RIDICULOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Between my parents they paid taxes for over 100 years combined..but that prob doesn't count.

I get it... SADLY others don't! Without passing "judgement" and not even using the information the OP received from the lady, I KNOW that I work everyday and pay taxes and right now I don't have enough money to go and buy $174 worth of candy for a party but your right... I hope she has a great party, and her friends have a great time... I will be working! Never mind if she "saved" some of her food stamps and was able to buy the candy with her "savings" I mean the government gives her that much so why shouldn't she WASTE what she has saved... I mean I am still working so she will have plenty next month!! I mean people without jobs who need government assistance need to throw parties too... right???

RIDICULOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[dodukes]

I get it... SADLY others don't! Without passing "judgement" and not even using the information the OP received from the lady, I KNOW that I work everyday and pay taxes and right now I don't have enough money to go and buy $174 worth of candy for a party but your right... I hope she has a great party, and her friends have a great time... I will be working! Never mind if she "saved" some of her food stamps and was able to buy the candy with her "savings" I mean the government gives her that much so why shouldn't she WASTE what she has saved... I mean I am still working so she will have plenty next month!! I mean people without jobs who need government assistance need to throw parties too... right???

RIDICULOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The guy next door to us is living with his mom, mid twenties, had 2 little kids and refuses to work. He tells my DBF taht he has been looking for work forever but is looking for managerial (i dont think this guy can change a light bulb, how he is manager material, lord knows). Anyway my DBF goes and gets him TWO jobs. (or sets him up to where he would be employed) Both of which he refused because they weren't paying enough ( i think dbf said somewhere about 8-9$ an hour). A lil while later(week maybe couple of weeks?) he invites dbf over for a bbq because his food stamps finally got approved.

Needless to say i DID NOT attend, I told dbf you are more than welcomed to go but when I cant go and do stupid things I want to do or splurge on random things I will not be attending the bbq to celebrate laziness and receiving food stamps. My dbf jsut said, just think about it this way, go eat the food that you are paying for.... Anway I think we went to the beach that day but regardless it kills me that people are lazy and then have children and still not care to do anything to make a buck.

 

[punkin]

I just know what I went through with my now deceased parents and the judging I got to hear every single time I used their food stamps (and oh my, did my shopping at the same time, and I paid cash for the cat food and steaks..can you imagine the judging that went on there..I see there is even juding about those types of purchased here, again having no idea of the persons background?)

Every time I see one of these threads (and they seem to be posted in one form or another fairly frequently), I remember the nasty looks I got when I was buying food for my Grandma using her foodstamps and paying for my own purchases with cash at the same time.

 

[VAfamily1998]

Maybe the party was to put together candy bags for the less fortunate.

I'm sorry, but someone that needs the government to pay for their food has no business spending $174 on "candy bags for the less fortunate"! That is just ridiculous.
If there are extra funds left at the end of the month after buying REAL groceries, it would be better to use the SNAP to buy canned/dry goods and stock the pantry, so if they ever eventually get off government assistance, and run into financial problems again, they will have some food storage to fall back on.

 

[rie'smom]

Every time I see one of these threads (and they seem to be posted in one form or another fairly frequently), I remember the nasty looks I got when I was buying food for my Grandma using her foodstamps and paying for my own purchases with cash at the same time.

In this thread, the OP was talking about someone she saw using $170+ in food stamps to buy candy for a party.

 

[arihillfarm]

It is ridiculous!!!! For some families that is a week worth of groceries.

For our family of four, soon to be five, that's about 2-3 weeks worth of groceries.

-Astrid

 

[DMRick]

Unless the story changed, the OP didn't know who the party was for in the original post:

Telling me how they are having a huge Halloween party and they had to buy lots of candy for said party. Well, that's wonderful, have fun I said back.

I give up..judge away if it makes you feel good. The OP saw this person in an aisle for a few minutes, happened to be behind her when she paid for her candy, and saw her total, knows she paid with food stamps, and from that few minutes has a complete story. It has to be that she was a bad person, not feeding her children, (shame on her for not using her foodstamps for future canned goods, or whatever (certainly not canned goods other than the store brand, because people on food stamps should only buy cheap stuff) and there could be no good reason why she was buying the candy. She had to be unemployed and never pays taxes.

The people behind me in line also thought they had a complete story (after all, I paid with food stamps, buying junk like pudding, ice cream etc (doctors orders, since my dad had lost so much weight with his cancer) and I got to hear their judging often. Especiallyt when I also did my own shopping and bought cat food and steak (and I can afford $130 in candy..prob should have paid myself for my dad's food, and not let him get foodstamps even though he qualified)! May even have been one of you.

For myself, I'll mind my own business, and assume there might be more to the story that I might not know, just like there was for me.

Carry on with all the stories of the people you know are cheating the system.

 

[C.Ann]

I get it... SADLY others don't! Without passing "judgement" and not even using the information the OP received from the lady, I KNOW that I work everyday and pay taxes and right now I don't have enough money to go and buy $174 worth of candy for a party but your right... I hope she has a great party, and her friends have a great time... I will be working! Never mind if she "saved" some of her food stamps and was able to buy the candy with her "savings" I mean the government gives her that much so why shouldn't she WASTE what she has saved... I mean I am still working so she will have plenty next month!! I mean people without jobs who need government assistance need to throw parties too... right???

RIDICULOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And a judmental person could say that you most certainly "can" afford to spend $174 on candy - but you're choosing to celebrate your birthday in WDW "again" instead..

That's where being judgmental about other peoples circumstances - especially based on no more that a 5 minute conversation - or one paragraph posted on a thread leads to..

I'll concern myself with all of our tax dollars being spent on wars - while everyone else conerns themselves over candy and how to dictate what foods other people are "allowed" to purchase and/or eat..

 

[woodkins]

Not being judgmental, but I think spending $170+ on candy is a bit nuts for a party....for anyone on assistance or not. You can get cake mix & frosting for $1 each & feed an army...cupcakes are waaaay better than candy anyway!!