Things My Mother Taught Me!

[~*Belle 2003*~]

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an
accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
'You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught! me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother ! taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, They are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come
running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"


So true - LOL!

 

[nativetxn]

Too cute, Belle

 

[Serena]

LOL, oh yes.

And I have to admit to using a few myself. Along with "Be careful! I don't have time to go to the emergency room today." I guess that would be time management. lol

 

[Serena]

LOL, oh yes.

And I have to admit to using a few myself. Along with "Be careful! I don't have time to go to the emergency room today." I guess that would be time management. lol

 

[cinlee3]

My Mom taught me so much in the time she was with us. Two of her favorite sayings that I will never forget are:

"Bloom where you are planted" and
"A job worth doing is worth doing well"

She taught me how to be a Mom, how to talk to my kids about anything.

Sniff, sniff - I miss her

Oh, she also taught me how to swear

 

[Lovely2CU]

Excellent stuff Belle - thanks for posting it.

One bit of motherly logic I never understood as a kid was the statement; "I've been so worried about you", followed by the slap of mother's hand!

 

[~*Belle 2003*~]

Originally posted by cinlee3

Oh, she also taught me how to swear

LOL Cinlee - did she tell you off when you did though?