The rich are different, or

[EthansMom]

I lived in a county in NJ where that's happening quite alot but not quite to that extent - we also have the "Moms that never had to work who are now having to look for work because their DH's have either been demoted or let go syndrome".

Yup, I'm in CT. There's a lot of SAHMs here who are "thinking about getting a job". Also, a lot more people who are cutting their own lawn this summer.

 

[janey99]

Yeah, I thought this as well. There were other scenes in the piece where the author discussed the recession, but it didn't really apply to Steins.

She's no different than many women who try to hold onto a house (and in this case a lifestyle) that they can't afford once the divorce is final. I think what was amazing is that she put herself out there like she did. Most people in that world don't talk about their finances like she did.

I found the article particularly interesting because that's what DH and I earn a year. And we save 60% of our net income....so we live on 80K a year.....and have what we think is a very comfortable life. Then again, my house didn't come with a title....lol! Also, we have no debt at all, and our property taxes are 1/5 of what she's paying. Oh, and no kids...so no nanny is necessary .

I suppose when you're used to twice that income (at least) and then are plunged down to 300K it's a tough adjustment. She seems to realize that the house has to go, but I wonder how she'll make out in a far smaller house (without a title....gasp). Her true income is 225K (with child support)....as she can't keep pulling from investments at the clip she is if she'd like to retire someday.

Oh well, I give her credit for sharing....it's interesting in hearing how people like that live.

DVCGirl -

I found the article interesting because this is slightly less than what DH and I earn a year too. We have a similar house, 2 small children and a nanny, all in a fairly "exclusive" suburb of north-central NJ (although it's no Rye!). We also have no debt but a mortgage (and a very reasonable one, thanks to some luck and arbitrage in the real estate market of recent years)

After doing some back of the envelope calculations, comparing our budget to hers (at least the parts she discloses), I can't figure out how she's doing it.

Her house is costing her waaay more than 8-10k a month, not to mention the multiple activities her kids are in and the other lifestyle perks I'm sure she hasn't given up, even though her "color" is suffering. The only way I can figure she's covering every month without being "in the hole" (either spending savings she has from somewhere, or running up credit card bills) is if she's is contributing absolutely nothing to her retirement and her kids future education. Even then, she's barely breaking even, probably saving nothing at all.

That is bleeping scary, considering that she has three elementary school age dependants. I'm thinking she did the article hoping that some white knight would come and rescue her!

Jane

 

[Tink-n-MrIncredible]

Recession related. This woman has not been affected by the recession. She has been affected by a divorce.


Oh and i'm sorry her 10yo only has a generic cell phone

 

[mumom95]

Maybe she needs to visit the budget board?

She'd get eaten alive on the budget board

 

[C.Ann]

Oh please.. "Squeaking by" on $300,000 a year?

Priorities my foot.. Her priorities should be to feed and clothe her children; keep a roof over their heads; put aside something for her own retirement; and maintain health insurance for herself and her children.. That's it - nothing more.. The rest is just a matter of "wants".. If she can't afford to live in her current home, she should move - plain and simple.. I'm sure there is somewhere she can live that would be less expensive and still allow her to keep her current job..

Can't work up any sympathy for someone who is putting "wants" above "needs"..

 

[Hoodie]

These areticles bug me because they only serve to create class envy. It's easy for those of us who earn much less than this woman to want to have the $300k/year and mock her for not being able to live within it. That is what she's used to and no one wants to have to make sacrifices when they have settled into a comfort zone.

Trust me, even our "poor" here are MUCH better off than most places in the world. As we're all rolling our eyes that this woman can't live on this annual income, someone somewhere is rolling their eyes at us because we complain about our income.

 

[3boymthr]

If I were "months overdue for a visit to my colorist" I would find a part time job to pay for it I found that to be the saddest part of the story

That and her horrible jeans

Let's hear it for Clairol!

I understand about the house though. In this market she'd probably not be able to sell it especially if it needs a lot of repairs (the cracked foundation, the leaky faucet). But she could probably sk ip the painter and get the carpets cleaned.

As for the nanny, based on the article that woman is more than a nanny - she's a housekeeper too. I'd say nix the full time nanny for a part time sitter and get a cleaner in once a week and feed the kids yourself. For that matter her kids are old enough to get themselves a bowl of cereal in the morning - mine do and they're about the same ages.

 

[Disney Doll]

You know what, I will roll my eyes at someone who has a house they can't afford, a gardener and a nanny and is going for weekends in the Hamptons and buying $30 bangle bracelets while not being able to afford to pay a painter. I will roll my eyes at someone who has raised their child to think that a certain kind of cell phone is a necessity. I will roll my eyes at someone who is mortgaging their retirement and their children's future to maintain the appearance of a "certain" lifestyle.

I have no envy of "certain" lifestyles. My theory is, and always has been, that money doesn't buy you happiness. If someone works to be able to afford thier lifestyle, then more power to them.

But, the bottom line is that this woman cannot afford her lifestyle. And her future, and more importantly, her children's futures are going to suffer.

DH & I have had a lot of medical expenses this year and health insurance with a pretty high deductible. He is a the manager of a real estate office. 'Nuff said about that! We all know how badly real estate has tanked. I am a nurse working part time clinically and part time with our IT department. My hours with our IT department have just been decreased. The hospital is fairly fully staffed, so I can't too many extra clinical hours there. We have adjusted our lifestyle. Not so many "treats"...we eat home more, don't do as many "social" things that cost money, don't buy any unneccssary items, nothing frivolous, bring lunch to work, turned the AC temp up a few degrees to save $$, turn the heat in the winter down a few degrees to save $$, shop woth coupons, don't color my hair (I earned the gray so I'm showing it off! ). You know...the usual cost-cutting measures that one does. It makes a difference.

Thankfully, we did not buy a house that was above our means. When we were house-hunting 15 years ago, we decided to buy something that either of us could support on one salary alone. Good move on our part. We didn't feel the need to show off, keep up with the Joneses or anything else.

My car is a 1998 Ford Explorer. DH's is a 2004 Ford Explorer. Neither of them give us any trouble (knock wood!) so we plan on keeping them until the cost to maintain them is higher than their value. My last car I had 13 years. I expect to get at least 13 years out of this one, and probably more. DH's last car was about 10 years old when he got a new one.

Sorry, but in this lady's case I think I'd get rid of the house & stop taking a loss every month...take one loss one time and get it over with, pare down the lifestyle...if she needs a nanny, she needs a nanny, but there's a lot of corners that can be cut in her life, based on what she said. And yes, she was used to a certain level of lifestyle...a level she can no longer afford.

 

[DWGal210]

I don't understand why she can't get rid of the gardener and make the nanny part time. Those kids are in school - they don't need a full time nanny. And for goodness sake, her children are old enough to get outside with rakes, shovels, etc and clean their own yard!

She needs to sell the house pronto, downsize the extras and get to essentials. With her salary and her child support, she still has a great income and can make it work.

It sounds to be that she is not teaching her kids in this situation. This could be a perfect teaching situation, but instead, she wants to keep up the status quo. That will do them NO favors, not now and not in the future when they have families and perhaps are in the same situation.

 

[hentob]

These areticles bug me because they only serve to create class envy. It's easy for those of us who earn much less than this woman to want to have the $300k/year and mock her for not being able to live within it.

Class envy I just don’t get who would be envious of people who live such horrific lives?

We make half of what his woman does and lead a waaaaay better life. We garden/do "grounds work" together as a family, tend to our own children (we even shop for them and make them their meals…..gasp), and do most of our own house repairs. If we can’t make the repair, we are able to pay the people we employ without haste.

Oh. And we sleep well at night knowing we live WITHIN our means.

This woman has a horrible existence as far as most educated people are concerned.



No envy here

 

[Heidict]

She is basically making the same amount as she has been before. Sure she lost a bit when her bonus was cut a bit, but even with it, I really don't think she would have had enough to cover all of her expenses. The stupid thing she did was buying out her ex on the house, which more then likely means a second mortgage. Bet he was laughing all the way to the bank.

The nanny is a live in and still makes $40,000 a year!! This nanny pays no rent, electricity, cable, phone, heating, groceries, internet and still gets $40,000 a year? Maybe mommy needs to take a bit more of the responsibilities of raising and taking care of her kids. Doing things that us normal people have to do even though we have to work also. Like cook, clean, do the laundry and shopping. She loves coming home to a clean house with dinner on the table, who wouldn't, but she is doing it at the cost of her children's futures and hers also. What is she going to do when the extra money she has been dipping into runs out? How is she going to cover her expenses then?

These areticles bug me because they only serve to create class envy. It's easy for those of us who earn much less than this woman to want to have the $300k/year and mock her for not being able to live within it. That is what she's used to and no one wants to have to make sacrifices when they have settled into a comfort zone.

Trust me, even our "poor" here are MUCH better off than most places in the world. As we're all rolling our eyes that this woman can't live on this annual income, someone somewhere is rolling their eyes at us because we complain about our income.

Oh trust me, no envy over here. She is more interested in keeping up her lifestyle then living within her means. Heaven forbid if she had to look bad in front of the other moms or her neighbors and couldn't have a gardner or nanny. Her image is what is most important to her.

I don't complain about my income. Would I like more, sure, who wouldn't? But I live within my means. If something happens and I can't afford the lifestyle I have become accustomed to then you can bet your bippy that I would be cutting the expenses instead of jeopardizing my DD's future. Everyone is capable of doing that, some just don't want to face the cold hard facts and do it.

 

[mickeylove2]

Get rid of the nanny, pool guy and gardener, rent out the extra room(s?) if possible and sell a car. That's a start! I am a single mom of a 6 & 8 year old, work f/t and go to college f/t- with absolutely NO financial help. I make roughly $38,000 a year and only receive about $2,600 a year in child support. But I bet my children and I are happier in life than her and her kids.

 

[clarabelle]

I just hope that people realize not everyone making that kind of money lives like that.
It wouldn't make a good article if she were "normal"

Most people I know making that kind of money shop at Target and drive Hondas.

 

[MushyMushy]

Aw, poor widdle thing can't maintain her previous lifestyle. Welcome to life, lady!

 

[Stitchfans]

How do we do it?

First thing that came to my mind.

 

[golfgal]

I don't think this was a very good article about the recession. The woman has only seen a 10% decrease in her income (roughly $30,000 less) but is pulling $50,000 out of her investments this year to help with her living expenses.

She needs to take a real look at her spending and make some serious adjustments to her lifestyle. Selling one car, having a part-time nanny (all of her children are in school, after all), having the pool guy and gardener come less often, and cutting back a bit on some other non-essentials would help a lot.

I don't understand why she can't get rid of the gardener and make the nanny part time. Those kids are in school - they don't need a full time nanny. And for goodness sake, her children are old enough to get outside with rakes, shovels, etc and clean their own yard!

She needs to sell the house pronto, downsize the extras and get to essentials. With her salary and her child support, she still has a great income and can make it work.

It sounds to be that she is not teaching her kids in this situation. This could be a perfect teaching situation, but instead, she wants to keep up the status quo. That will do them NO favors, not now and not in the future when they have families and perhaps are in the same situation.

I agree-let the kids clean the house and cut the grass. Who cares how much money you make these are life skills that the kids should learn. At the ages of those kids they should be PLENTY capable of doing most of the basic housework instead of worrying about getting a new IPOD or cell phone-heck, I am sure there are other people in the neighborhood that are in similar situations that would gladly pay a kid $50 to do the lawn and they can earn the money for the new IPOD in a weekend.

 

[ChrizJen]

If I had to take $50,000 out of my savings to maintain my "priorities", I'd change my priorities.

Amen...Anyone who thinks that this woman is a "victim" of the struggling economy is in the same "La La Land" that she is in. She chooses to maintain the lifestyle. I don't care what she and her children are accustomed to. If they were truly suffering, they would simply get used to a different lifestyle. Plain and simple. "The rest of us" seem to somehow get by without nannies and painters and pool boys. She and her children would just have to do the same. Thing is, she is making the CHOICE to live that way. It doesn't have to be a struggle for her. I have no sympathy for her at all.

 

[ChrizJen]

I just hope that people realize not everyone making that kind of money lives like that.
It wouldn't make a good article if she were "normal"

Most people I know making that kind of money shop at Target and drive Hondas.

Don't get me wrong. I don't have a problem at all with how much money she makes. And I do realize that not all people in that income bracket live the way she does. My only criticism is that any normal family with that kind of income should easily be able to make it without struggling "paycheck to paycheck". She should take a lesson from those people that you know. She should try living within her means.

 

[rayelias]

Judge not.

I wonder what people in 3rd world countries, living in huts, without electricity or plumbing think about "poor" people in OUR country that complain that times are so hard that they have to cut back on their cable bill, or their cell phone, or they can't go on vacation, or they can't afford air conditioning, or they can't afford to go out to dinner, etc.

It's all perception.

$300k a year to one person is a blessing; to another, a curse.

 

[Chicago526]

To try to be perfectly fare, most of us would have a lot of adjustments to make if we had a signifigant reduction in income. It doesn't mater the income level, a severe and sudden decrese can be hard to handle. She won't be the first or the last to try to cling to the old way of things for a while. Denial is not just a river and all that.

And think about this logically for a second. Depending on how large a yard she has, and how complex the landscaping is, having a gardener or landscape service isn't as insane as it sounds, even small basic yards can be a lot of work (trust me, I have one!). With the kind of high end home she has, she probably has the high end outdoor space to match. Pools can be a lot of work too. Now, there is certainly room to cut back or shop for cheaper services, but I can see how cutting these down to nothing isn't relistic for a single mother working full time. There are only so many hours in the day.

As for the nanny, it really depends on her work hours and commutte. If she's a high powered exec she could be expected to work 10 hour days on a regular basis and have a long commutte on top of that. For that many kids, a nanny could actually be a better value than child care or a babysitter. Again, a reduction in salary or seeing if a p/t nanny would work out is a great place to cut back, but I'd imagine she has a real need for child care, she's not just being a lazy mother.

Yes, she certainly has the resources to cut back and still have a nice life, but sometimes when you're in the middle of it, it's not so obvious. She may be mourning the end of her marriage, worried about the effects of the divorce on the kids, and thinks that by keeping their lifestyle the same the kids won't be as upset. She'd be wrong, but in her mind it could make sense.

What she really needs is a financial planner or advisor, or maybe a life coach...someone impartial that can objectively look at her situation and figure out what she needs to cut back or change to get back on track. I would assume her friends are all in the same social/economic class she is and may not be the best people to go to for help.

All this said, she's probably not the best example to use in a finance article about coping with the economic downturn...what was the writer and editor thinking?