The Overspent American. Help me, I hate budgeting!!

[eliza61]

LOL. This is more of a hypothetical question.

Not a real budget question, I've got a slow day and the first thing I thought to do was to "go shopping" even though I really don't need any thing.

How do thrifty folks NOT do that?

I'm reading a book called The overspent American and the premise is that as a country we've been programmed to believe that "more is better" but in reality so called Cheapskates are actually happier because they feel spending less money creates more time. The relentless pressure to buy more crap makes things like free time and relationship hard.

So thrifty folks how do you embrace this mentality.

I'll admit I hate budgeting. I probably do it because my family & l love traveling and I have 1 kid in college and 1 on the way who are sucking every dollar out of my wallet.

 

[dvcgirl]

LOL. This is more of a hypothetical question.

Not a real budget question, I've got a slow day and the first thing I thought to do was to "go shopping" even though I really don't need any thing.

How do thrifty folks NOT do that?

I'm reading a book called The overspent American and the premise is that as a country we've been programmed to believe that "more is better" but in reality so called Cheapskates are actually happier because they feel spending less money creates more time. The relentless pressure to buy more crap makes things like free time and relationship hard.

So thrifty folks how do you embrace this mentality.

I'll admit I hate budgeting. I probably do it because my family & l love traveling and I have 1 kid in college and 1 on the way who are sucking every dollar out of my wallet.

Too funny. Well, it sounds like you shop for fun, for the sport of it.

I don't know that I'd consider myself thrifty, maybe to a degree, but I *love* to budget, and sticking to that budget is sacred. DH and I are very goal oriented I guess, and sticking to the budget means we always meet our financial goals....primarily, that we're saving and investing what we set out to do in our yearly financial planning session (we do this each January).

I will tell you that I *loathe* shopping....so, I guess I'm lucky in that regard. Seriously, I'd rather go to the dentist than go clothes shopping. I hate it. So, I'm not the typical woman in that regard. But I think that if you have the money in the budget to go shopping, that it's really fine. The problem for many Americans is that they shop when the get bored, or for fun, and they really have no business doing so.

 

[CALIFLADY]

I agree with the premise of the book you're reading. I'm what many friends have referred to as a minimalist. I just don't have a lot of stuff around. I have everything I need, but not much else.

My closet is rather bare, but then I don't do fancy soializing, so I don't even need a dress!

I have every tool I need in the kitchen, but I'm not a huge gadget person, so I actually have a few bare shelves in my kitchen cupboards.

My brother came to visit me earlier this year and asked why I didn't have an internet router. Because I sit in my office and work on my computer. I have no desire/need to sit in front of the TV or on the deck typing on my laptop.

The point of the book is, having less is liberating. I have less to keep track of, maintain, clean, and move with me. Uncluttering your house also unclutters your head. Something like that...

 

[vicki_c]

If you want a budgeting program, try You Need a Budget. We have switched from using MS Money (which wasn't really any good for budgeting) to YNAB and it's awesome!

http://www.youneedabudget.com/

But I am a spender as well, so I feel your pain. I am trying very hard to change that mindset - and I've had it my whole life! It's not so easy to separate out need from want, when you haven't ever done it before!

 

[denise5374]

I think some people become non-spenders out of necessity...they don't have any money. After a while of living like that, it becomes second nature.

 

[PrincessDadx2]

LOL. This is more of a hypothetical question.

Not a real budget question, I've got a slow day and the first thing I thought to do was to "go shopping" even though I really don't need any thing.

How do thrifty folks NOT do that?

Ah, don't go to the store Get a cheap hobby, make a friend, go to the library, the options are only limited by your imagination

I think the biggest thing is to have a goal. Would I rather have the 15th purse or money in my Disney fund? All money will be spent, so you have to have a means to prioritize it or you will spend it on whatever is in front of you.

For me, I don't really budget, but the most important things are automatic. Giving, retirement, college funds, vacation come automatically off the top. Everything else is free to spend, but when the money is gone it is gone. If I go over, then I have to cut back next month. Use the pantry instead of going out to eat, etc.

Also, stopping watching TV and your neighbors will help. TV ads and lifestyles are not the reality except for extremely wealthy people.

 

[leebee]

We don't budget, we just don't have any 'extra' money to spend. Anything "left over" from this month is already committed to next month: Mortgage, internet, phone (landline only), cable (extended basic, no premium channels, 72 stations is enough), electricity, oil, medical bills.

We only buy what we need... and nobody needs a dozen pairs of shoes! I guess maybe that's the key; sort out "wants" from "needs" and you will stop buying all the time. I also decided, awhile ago, that if something costs over $100, it's not a toy, and dd doesn't need it. That lets out digital cameras (we have one camera for the family, she doesn't need to take pix of herself/friends 24/7), Ipods, gaming devices, etc. DD had a decent MP3 player and I have an additional $125 in the bank, to pay for food and gas. We all have enough clothes, but we have what we need, not multiple everything because it's "cute". (OK, maybe I violate this a tad for DD, sometimes it's hard to say no!).

It's really just a matter of priorities, and not thinking of money as "extra". Unfortunately we don't have much savings ($7000, but $5000 is untouchable in our minds, for emergencies like the furnace dies... we are not even touching that to replace my almost-dead van), don't have vacation funds or a college fund. We just don't earn that much money, although I have a master's degree and DH a PhD. The economy has not been kind to us, and professional positions where we live (and at our ages, 50+) are few and far between. It's not the life we thought we'd get, but it's the life we have, and we still get to WDW every other year. We just don't spend much on anything.

 

[Virgderon]

For me, I'm not great at budgeting, but I am relentess at finding deals. I use Priceline and resteraunt.com religously- basically won't stay at a hotel and rarely go out for a meal if I can't get use them.

Couponing and looking for sales at the grocery store is relatively new to me, but I am diving in like crazy. I've always couponed for toiletries and cleaning supplies.

I buy all my books at the flea market for $1.50 to $2.50.

I can't tell you the last time I bought clothes that were not on sale, and I like to wait until Old Navy and the Limited are doing clearance sales at 70% off.

I own less than 8 pairs of shoes, and I buy them at Payless on sale.

We go to baseball games and sit in the upper deck where tickets are only $12.00. We have season passes to arena football that cost about $8.00 per game.

DD was in the college program at Disney this year, and we are also Florida residents, so we have been able to do Disney, Universal, Busch Gardens and SeaWorld very cheaply this year. DD saved us about $700 on Disney tickets alone between Thanksgiving and Christmas.

We go to the free concerts at Busch Gardens and Universal and sometimes don't even go on the rides. ( we have the annual pass , and we pay $20 a month on a payment plan for the AP.)

My weakness is when the kids come to visit. All my thriftiness goes out the window. I buy expensive meals, souvenirs, tons of water and pop and a week later I am shocked at what I did.

 

[mrodgers]

I think some people become non-spenders out of necessity...they don't have any money. After a while of living like that, it becomes second nature.

Bingo. I get a real kick out of folks who make a lot of income that spend like there's no tomorrow on stupid stuff, then complain about being broke.

I don't have to budget myself. Bank of America, Chase, DirectTV, CenturyLink, State Farm, Allegheny Power, and Children's Hospital does my budget for me. they send me convenient letters in the mail every month telling me how to spend every penny of my money. I just wish they would leave some in the budget for McKnight Oil, Exxon, and Giant Eagle.

They did leave me $7 leftover of the budget this week. I was able to buy a package of 7 underwear. Yahoo, now I have 8 pair!

 

[RachelsMommie]

I am a SUPER strict budgeter. We're trying to pay off our house now, and that is a big elephant to slay one bit at a time.

However, I go shopping all the time for fun on the weekends. Not as much as I used to, but I still do it. I will go to Target and look for things on clearance. Gifts for my nieces/nephews for upcoming birthdays, items for an upcoming party in the next few months, and in the 2nd half of the year, great deals on items for Christmas. And sometimes I'll look at the grocery ads to see if there are great deals on meat (like boneless chicken breasts < $2/pound) and will go stock up and put it in the freezer. Or clothes on clearance for next year for my DDs. We have GREAT fun and a lot of times we come home empty handed.

I always use my monthly money (I budget a certain amount for grocery, a certain amount for entertainment and miscellaneous for each month) so I have zero guilt.

 

[ZephyrHawk]

It sounds to me as though your problem is not that you want to spend, but that you're bored and shopping just seems like the thing to do. Get yourself into another hobby. Perhaps something that will ultimately save you money. For instance, start a garden in your backyard and save on fresh produce. Learn to sew or knit and save on clothes.

In our household, we don't care so much about stuff, we care about travel. Sure, we don't have the latest gadgets, and our clothing style leaves something to be desired, but our photo albums of the places we've been and the things we've done fill our shelves.

 

[LisaInNc]

I think that it's how you look at things.

Shopping when I go my rule is if it's not on sale unless I NEED it (not want it) I don't get it. Simple.

I try to make a game out of saving money.

You have to refuse to use credit cards for non emergency purchases.

That is a good way to start.

When you have the urge to buy something you need to think...do I really need this?

Lisa

 

[Planogirl]

I shop a lot because I enjoy it but I don't buy much. I hunt for bargains for things I need and the occasional book. Books are my downfall but I've gotten to where I can buy one paperback and feel satisfied.

Since you like to shop, could you try not buying as much? My mother practiced the philosophy of putting one thing back. She would get several items and then would put the most expensive thing back. Then she might browse a bit more and put something else back. She did this with clothes and since I'm not much of a clothes shopper I haven't tried it yet.

 

[cglaura]

I pay cash for everything. If I don't have the cash, I can't go shopping.

The cash I keep on hand is only for that. Everything else after the bills are paid from the checking acct. gets transferred to savings, ira, etc.

So you can still get your shopping fix in, but you'll know exactly what you can spend.

 

[Shanan]

My big budget buster is scrapbooking. I know my limits so I don't go into Hobby Lobby as much as I used to and stay away from online scrapbooking stores. I do try to use the supplies that I have at home now.

Another budget buster for me is time/convenience. Instead of pre-planning for meals, I will run by grocery store and get something quick and convenient which of course I would not need to do if I took time to plan meals.

 

[Colleen27]

Thrift and simplicity is easy for me because I'm just not a shopper by nature. I set foot in a mall all of once a year, when DH & I do our big Christmas shopping day out, and I generally keep even trips to the local shops to a minimum. I hate clothes shopping, I'm a jeans-and-tees girl who doesn't care a whit about the latest styles, and I'm something of a minimalist who abhors clutter. Bookstores are my only weakness and even that is starting to get on my nerves; DH & I are paring down our book collection in a big way and anything that doesn't get a spot on the office built-ins is bound for the library sale. I'm so looking forward to the iPad DH is going to get me for Christmas so I can switch over to e-books that only take up hard-drive space.

What Zephyr said about caring about travel, not possessions, is true for my family as well. There's just nothing at any store that gives me as much pleasure as the trips we take, so there's little temptation to spend money shopping that could otherwise be used for vacationing.

 

[Justsyd2]

We don't have a budget now, but I've lived most of my life with one. I think the trick is to determine what is really important to you, and save money for "that" instead of randomly spending money. Look at my tickers..we stopped blowing money and save for trips instead, BUT, we allot spending money for each other each week so that we can purchase things. That way is doesn't feel like we have to "give up what we want" in order to get to go on trips.

 

[crisi]

I don't like to shop either. And that makes it a lot easier.

Two other things which have been mentioned upthread. 1. Would you rather have your 15th purse or....learn to look at every purchase as opportunity cost and a spend which takes you futher from your "big goal" - whatever your big goal is. Pay off the mortgage. Pay for college. Visit Europe.

2. Have an inexpensive hobby. Read. Old movies. Paint. Play the piano. Garden. Hang on the DISBoards. Avoid hobbies that are excuses to spend money - spending $10 to spend five minutes pasting things onto a scrapbooking page is not going to give you a lot of bang for you buck. So go for things where the supplies are cheap (or free) and the result is something you enjoy that consumes time. i.e. buying six expensive beads to string onto a leather cord isn't going to be an inexpensive hobby. Buying $10 worth of string beads, a crochet hood and thread and beading a purse might take three months.

 

[PrincessBelle09]

I have only been budgeting for a few months and this month is probably going to be the first one where I've got it "right" (know how much I actually need to spend in each category. Several things have helped me start budgeting and stop shopping and they are all Dave Ramsey related, of course. =p First, I remind myself as am I writing my budget and then keeping up with it that I am "telling my my money where to go, not wondering where it went." Also, I have started allocating cash for all purchase categories at the beginning of the month. If I do not have the cash set aside for that particular shopping trip or extra purchase, I just don't do it.
I am not saying that it is easy. I love love love going shopping. Accumulating new "stuff" has always been my way of making myself feel better or fight off boredom. I was moderately spoiled as a child as well, so I am not used to be told no or telling myself no. If you're interested in not shopping so much, these methods could be a start.

 

[princessbride6205]

I also enjoy shopping and browsing. I'm kind of a cheapskate but I also like to get new things - not for myself, but for the house or DD.

I am at the end of my rope with clutter right now, so I tell myself - do I want another thing to find on the floor or need to put away?

Travel and vacations are what we're always saving for, so that's another motivator.

Shopping/browsing is more of a hobby or boredom buster. Since DH and I work full time, we try to have family time on the weekend, and he doesn't like to do anything! His idea of a good weekend is lying around the house one day, going out for all meals, and walking around the mall the other day. So for us, it is more about finding different, cheap or free things to do. I don't have many ideas - I've had trouble finding inexpensive things to do that we can all enjoy as a family.