~The Man Report 2006~~~~~End & Summary~~~~~Lots of Pictures

[stinkerbelle's mom]

Day 9 – Epcot – Oreos & Canadian Whiskey

Here’s the problem with buffets; you overeat to make sure you get your moneys worth. With Disney buffets, there are many other problems.

We arrived today for our last ADR (the rest have been canceled) at the Akershus Storybook Breakfast. There’s supposed to be princesses and food galore. This also means hundreds of cranky toddlers & preschoolers followed by irritated parents who are then sometimes followed by smiling grandparents.

What in the heck are those pesky grandparents always smiling about? Every grandparent in the World is smiling while everyone else is miserable. They obviously know something we do not.

Anyway, we show up early, check in and wander around Norway snapping pictures at anything trying to kill time. Our only worry is the irritable Moan Boy. We luck out as our name is called within 5 minutes of checking in.

Have you been to one of these things before? Let me tell you, it’s a sight to behold! Children and parents, waiters, waitresses, cooks, hosts and hostesses, princesses and photographers. There are more cast members than guests!

We are placed in our first line where my daughter’s eye immediately goes to “Belle” who is the “Main” princess of the day. She stands stationary in a little room and your daughter walks in, gets a picture, then you are placed in a holding line to be seated for breakfast. Moan Boy figures, what the heck, so he gets a picture also.

After 25 minutes of ballyhoo, you finally get seated and get to meet your first Norwegian. Our Norwegian (waitress) is dressed in old, Bavarian style clothing (by my untrained eye anyhow) and has blonde hair. In fact, all the Norwegians have blonde hair. No joke either.

We can’t really understand her English but gather that she is indicating we need to go to the buffet. We fight our way to the front of the buffet line like seniors at the “early bird” meal and are horrified to not recognize much of the fare being served here. My daughter keeps yelling “eggs, eggs, eggs”. Problem is I see no eggs. I see some fruit, cheese, cold meat, and raw salmon. Yes, raw salmon. No sausage, bacon, eggs, or donuts.

I load up on cheese, salami, and crackers. I can eat this any time and it don’t matter if it’s for breakfast. All I need now is a cold frosty beer and a football game and I’m all set.

Since I’m not familiar with the routine here, I take enough for an entire meal. People are now looking at me and pointing as I walk back to our table with a mountain of processed meat and goat cheese where I go to work on what turns out to be a very delicious feast.

Minutes later, our waitress, the blond Norwegian, brings out a huge plate of eggs, bacon, sausage and a potato casserole. I’m already happy but now I’m ecstatic. Loud Girl loads up on eggs while Moan Boy grabs ALL the bacon (plus most of the second helping we receive from our waitress, the blond Norwegian ). Mom takes a giant sliver of the potato casserole while I grab a sausage and some eggs. Next comes coffee, OJ, and apple juice. My eyes are slowly rolling into the back of my head when the first princess comes sauntering out.

I think 5 came out total and the only one I knew was Snow White. Hard to miss her with that crazy dress she’s always sportin’. We snapped 20 pictures, purchased the $30 photo of daughter and Belle at the beginning of breakfast and hit the road. Only 45 minutes had passed. Disney knows what they are doing!

It was Epcot day and we did all the usual stuff. The difference was we were all stuffed and bloated from breakfast so no nibbling or sipping wine. At 1pm, we called it a day and went swimming.

After swimming, we took a break in the room before heading to Downtown Disney for food and margaritas. We hit the Earl of Sandwich again but I’m still full from breakfast. Does that stop me? Nope! I order a sandwich, eat a bag of potato chips, and gulp down a margarita. I need help!

I’m having problems even breathing. My body is so full of grease and carbs I can barely walk. Toss in some cheap tequila and I’m a wreck. Tonight I’m going to stuff myself with Oreos and Canadian Whiskey in the room while watching a movie. I’m sure to wake up around midnight underneath the kitchen table with crumbled up cookies stuck to my face and body.

I may be a candidate for the Betty Ford Clinic upon our return home. I will need to detox my body off the Disney food first and foremost. It’s really starting to get to me. I need to eat a leaf or something. Maybe a carrot. Something not fried, breaded or formally mooing. I find I now sweat in the shower. That can’t be good. Also, my “stretchy” shorts are starting to look strained. I won’t even go near the portion of the closet where shorts with buttons & zippers are located!

Could two weeks on vacation ruin a years worth of dieting? Probably since that diet started after our return home from the LAST vacation.

The only thing that keeps me going is the pedometer reading (17.4 miles as of two minutes ago). We’re on pace to hit 24 miles or 2 miles per day average. That’s not bad but I run 4 ½ miles per day back home so I’m really going in the wrong direction. That might explain my fear of the non-stretchy shorts section of my Disney closet.

Well, that’s about all for the day. We are slowing down, unable to keep up with our earlier frantic pace. Tomorrow is MGM for the first time since the debacle last week. It’s the only park we have yet to master so the game plan is set, and the troops know their duties. Starting tomorrow at 8:45 am, we begin our own little D-Day invasion of MGM.

Talk to you tomorrow! MDF

This could be your best installment yet. BTW, the grandparents are smiling because they're thinking of all the misery their own kids caused them & love that the grandkids are torturing their parents. You know the ole "Been there, done that" routine!

 

[blue_river]

Sitting here with my cup of tea.

I was a bit behind again and enjoyed your new installments.

They really are fantastic...being live and all. You both have such a great sense of humour. It keeps me smiling

Loved all your pics as usual and thx for posting some of the resort. Charming place.

Buzz - I suspect you'll be sleeping on the couch tonight after posting that pic of Linnie eating the chicken

Linnie - paybacks are a ..... I won't say it.... but you know what I mean

I laughed so hard at this part:

"Also, my “stretchy” shorts are starting to look strained. I won’t even go near the portion of the closet where shorts with buttons & zippers are located!"

and spewed my tea all over my laptop - dang it

Linnie - I had quite a few pics taken with the characters - I'm such a kid at heart. Next time I plan on buying my own autograph book. Why not? Wasn't able to do that as a child and I feel that I have missed out. I now live my life doing the things that are important to me (with exceptions of course)

It's probably a good thing that you're starting to slow down. This is a vacation after all

for taking the time to share with us all and I'll be back to read about your adventures in MGM. Have fun!

 

[blue_river]

It does get easier with time. You just got a double whammy. Maybe you could get yourself a nice holiday ornament to represent your dad & your grandma.

Montanna Family: sorry for the hijacking here

stinkerbelle: that is such a terrific idea...i'm taking this advice

 

[Montana Disney Fan]

Day 10 – MGM – Part #1 - The Mermaid “Nazi”

I won’t bore you all with excruciating details of the morning at MGM but suffice it to say, Veni, Vidi, Vici.

I will tell you that I met Darth Vader today and his sidekick, “Sammy” the Stormtrooper.

Now, let me tell you, Darth is quite the imposing creature and my daughter was terrified to be around him. He’s all big and menacing looking. It was cool. We got some pictures which I’ll post later.

We were second in line to meet Darth & Sammy and after we got our pictures, I looked back and the line was now close to 50 or 60. We lucked out!

Well, not exactly lucky. As we walked off Star Tours 45 minutes earlier, they were just leaving and my wife heard a cast member say they’ll be back at 11 a.m. My wife definitely wanted pictures with these two so we went to Muppet Vision, and then came back at precisely 11 a.m. to find only one couple standing in line. We jumped behind them and soon the dynamic duo appeared.

I have to say, it was pretty cool. Meeting Mickey Mouse is, well you know, not bad. But Darth Vader! Wow! He could have killed me with a blink of his eye!

Prior to this encounter, I had a little run in at Voyage of the Little Mermaid with a Disney Cast Member. Nothing big, but a little irritating. Now mind you, this is not my first time having problems with the Cast at this attraction. Last year, while waiting in the queue, my daughter yells out, “Dad, I gotta poop!”. So mom packs her up and heads to the nearest toilet while Moan Boy and I hold our spots. We are standing right next to the doors to go in and are the first to enter the theater.

Since I’m a nice guy, I hold two extra seats at the very end of the row for Wife and Loud Girl. Before they show up though, the Mermaid Nazi is on me telling me to “…fill in all the seat!”. I calmly start to explain that I’m holding the seats for my daugh… when he all of sudden cuts me off and barks “FILL IN ALL THE SEATS”.

I walk up and get real close to him so he can feel my intensity when I calmly explain that I’m holding the seats for my family and if he has a problem with that he should go fetch his immediate supervisor so I can explain it to him. He nods, backs away, and says “ok, I’m sorry sir, you may hold those seats”. Thank you!

Loud Girl and Mom are the last to enter, I flag them down and they come and sit by us. All is well.

This year, there’s nobody here so we don’t have to fill in all the seats. We’re one of the first ones to enter and we grab a row with nobody in it mosey down to sit about 7 seats from the end, leaving those empty.

Well, once again a new Mermaid Nazi starts barking at not just me but the entire audience to move in and fill in the auditorium. Someone down below is trying to explain that nobody was in the queue and the theater will be only 25% full when the Nazi starts yelling again to “FILL IN ALL THE AVAILABLE SPACE…” and he wasn’t nice about it!

I wasn’t moving. It was stupid to do so. There wasn’t anyone here and nobody entering the theater. In fact, we all stayed put. Nobody moved. It was great. I had this big smile on my face. The Nazi was very flustered by this point. I enjoyed watching his frustration.

I put my hat on Moan Boy and took a picture before the show started. The doors were still open, the lights were on, people were still milling around, it was harmless.

The Nazi comes over to me and gives me “heck” for taking a *FLASH* picture and that I can’t take *FLASH* pictures in the theater. The show wasn’t on. There were no performers on stage. I just thought Moan Boy was cute with my hat on him. My camera was already stowed and was not eagerly waiting in my hand for me to take shots during the show. It made no sense to me so I say “I just did. What are you going to do about it?” Poor guy was having a bad day. He just walked away mumbling something about “you better not take a picture during the show”. Typical Nazi, all bark and no bite.

Anyway, guess what? Someone did take a flash picture of the Sea Witch during the show. I couldn’t believe it. They make it very clear to NOT take pictures during the show. Contrary to what the Mermaid Nazi might think (my picture was before the show). Besides, what good is a picture without family members in it?

The wife and I are both thinking the same thing; Buzz is gunna get blamed for this. After the show we bolted out of there to avoid a scene. I wasn’t going to be nice if the Mermaid Nazi tried to pin the caper on me.

The only other raw service we’ve received on this trip was the madam “Gate Guard” at SSR when we arrived on Saturday morning. I showed my DVC card, which is usually good enough to get in any DVC resort (it’s a perk), but she holds me up, asking why I’m here. I say I’m checking in and she asks for my card again and also my ID. She goes over them good then calls the front desk to make sure my name is on the list. By this point I’m irritated. She’s obviously one of those people who let a little “power” go to their heads. If I was here to merely swim, it is my right as a member of DVC. There should be no "guff" involved at all.

When we return later to finally get our room, a new Gate Guard is there but I’m prepared this time. I show him my DVC card and ID and he only grabs the DVC card, enthusiastically says “Welcome Home Sir” (just like they're supposed to do) and lets me thru.

Now why can’t the other guard have done that? Very irritating.

Well, we went swimming and the kids are getting a bath now then mom and dad are off on another night alone as our baby-sitter is coming back tonight at 6 p.m. We’re going to hang out at Epcot, taste some wine, watch some shows, stay for Illuminations & just totally "wing" it. After that we’ll probably just hang around the Boardwalk for a while. I will park at the BW prior to going to Epcot as is my right. I will show them my DVC membership card, and will get no “guff” unless I’m unlucky and the madam “Gate Guard” is on duty at this resort. If so, I might just run her over.

Should be a lot of fun and I’ll post Part #2 tomorrow.

Later Gang, Buzz

 

[Linnie The Pooh]

What? you only recognized one out of 5?

Linnie the Pooh, please fill in the missing princesses for me?

Let's see there was Belle at the entrance.
Snow White
Moulon (Is that how you spell that?)
Jasmine
Sleeping Beauty
Uh oh, I can't remember the other one!!!

DD is telling me that was all. If I remember the other one (if there is one) I'll post it.

Today was great at MGM!! I loved meeting Darth and the storm trooper. When I heard they were coming back at 11, I knew I had to be there!! I'm not a Star Wars fan, but it was so cool seeing them. I was actually a little nervous of the Darth-he's HUGE!! Must be 7 feet tall. Quite menacing looking. I can't wait to show my nephews and brother-they're huge STar Wars fans and are so eager to go on a trip to WDW just to see the Star Wars store. They'll be so jealous I got to meet Darth!!

 

[Cass]

Let's see there was Belle at the entrance.
Snow White
Moulon (Is that how you spell that?)
Jasmine
Sleeping Beauty
Uh oh, I can't remember the other one!!!

Mary Poppins, maybe?

 

[stinkerbelle's mom]

Montanna Family: sorry for the hijacking here

stinkerbelle: that is such a terrific idea...i'm taking this advice

Thanks! Oh, now I feel like Martha Stewart!

Ok, sorry Buzz & LTP, please continue with your exciting family vacation reports!

 

[blue_river]

I'm not going to quote all the parts I'd like to today because I don't have time...I'm off and running to prepare for my DD's bday party.

Just wanted to let you know that you had me smiling and laughing with your latest installment

Hopefully I'll have some extra time over the weekend to read your next post, look at your new pics (once you post them), catch up with all my other subscribed tr's and write some more of my own.

 

[serendipity]

more please!

 

[Montana Disney Fan]

more please!

I'm going to finish when I get home tomorrow or Sunday. We just got back to the room after our final day in the parks (Epcot) and 2 1/2 hours of swimming (small pool).

I still have the second half of yesterday to finish plus today and tomorrow.

Here are some pictures to hold you over. I'll post a little more tonight though also.

Moan Boy & Dad at the small pool. Our room is right behind us, top floor, far left.

The “Spitting” Frogs. I started my own version of “Spitting” Buzz.

At my post, pop in hand, entertaining you fine people. Why do I do this?

9 a.m. and all is calm. We’re off to Test Track. Imagine that!

”I did ToT with my daddy!”

I didn’t get a margarita but I’m still happy!

I DID get a margarita and I’m VERY happy!

After this picture, Darth cut off my left arm with his light saber. Apparently, he’d been talking to the Mermaid Nazi.

The picture I hope to show the police of the perp leaving the scene of the crime. I used my good arm for the shot. ::cop:

 

[Linnie The Pooh]

That is a good idea about the ornaments. I was just thinking that when we get home, it'll be 3 months already since my dad has been gone. I can't believe it's been that long already. I did get a little sad last night during Illuminations when I heard the song and the lyrics were something like, "moving forward through the good times and the tears." Dang near broke down right outside France, but I held it together. Why oh why does Disney's music primarily consist of tear-jerking, heart strings-tugging lyrics?

Today was our last park day. I really don't want to go home. Sheesh. Back to reality. My DD put if perfectly the morning we left. It was cold & snowing. We were backing out of the driveway and she says, "When we get back to this world..." I forget the rest, but I thought that's exactly what it's like-a different world. Kids and their insights.

Epcot was fun last night. I needed a night out and some time by myself to shop. I'll let Buzz post about it though. Suffice it to say, the last day was GREAT!! Many surprises and good things happened to us.

I did have another bathroom issue. I'm sure he'll be telling you all about it. Maybe has something to do with Epcot. It's like the public library, Barnes and Noble and Kmart. Just walking into those places makes me have to go to the bathroom. Even DD was getting into it, "Mom has to go to the bathroom again????!!!"

And yes, he'll be getting majorly paid back for that eating picture! That's not the first picture he's taken of me while I'm eating. One of his relatives saw one (from a few years ago) and said, "That really captures Linnie's personality." Great. Sweating and eating. That's me.

I do have to say that I'm looking forward to going home and typing on my own keyboard that fits my man hands. No more of this dainty one!!

 

[iamjkmb]

great report!

 

[remfam5]

What excitement--- I just found your trippy!
And I just had to say "HI" while you are still in the world. You are, aren't you? You haven't left yet, have you? No, I'm pretty sure you leave tomorrow.

Before I gush about your report---- a little 4-1-1 about "US".

#1) We feel an instant animal connection to anyone from MT. (or is it all the deer spirits we've hit with our cars traveling the Big Sky roads?)

#2) Hubby and I both grew up in Gt. Falls. with many a relative still there.

#3) both went to school at UM

#4) Spend our summers at our place on Flathead (heaven on earth!)

#5) But, unlike your cute little family--- I am pretty much the only Disney addict in our cute little family.

OK, enough about me. (like I said though, it's fun to "meet" people from your home state!)

And onto YOU....
You have been entertaining me all afternoon with your report (I'm finally all caught up). Anxious to hear how you guys wrap it up.

And a shout out to your wife---- you make me laugh! Love your additions and "what-really-happened"!

Great Job guys!!

 

[adreayoung]

I love this TR Your picture captions are funny I can't wait to go back down in March I'm so stoked! I think my mom is getting tired of me talking about it

 

[sherreis]

Looking forward to hearing how the trip ended. It's been wonderful going with you on your vacation.

Thanks for more pics. As I've said before, you have a beautiful family.

 

[Martha7]

Hey, guys, would it be too much to ask for you to keep reporting like this about your regular lives back at home? I'm afraid you've created countless addicts here and you can't just cut us off cold turkey! I hope your trip home is uneventful and easy!

 

[IWantMickey]

I did have another bathroom issue. I'm sure he'll be telling you all about it. Maybe has something to do with Epcot. It's like the public library, Barnes and Noble and Kmart. Just walking into those places makes me have to go to the bathroom.

Linnie The Pooh, I am also perplexed by this phenomenon! For my DH, it's Home Depot or Lowes. Go figure!

Well it took me a few days to read this thread, but I agree with the rest of the responses. You and your husband are very entertaining and have a great writing style. I love the "he said/she said" point of view. Great pictures, too!

Keep up the great work!

 

[IWantMickey]

OK, I'm back. I had to cut my comments short because I didn't want my DH to see the Home Depot/Lowes comment! I haven't told him how much fun the DIS is because, once he gets into it, I'll never get computer time again. Keep him in the dark, that's what I say!

Montana Disney Fan, here are some for you for your wonderful trip report. And, Linnie The Pooh, here's some for you - we all know you're the glue (duct tape?) who holds it all together.

Here's to more entertaining reports!

 

[Montana Disney Fan]

Hi Gang! Well, it's Saturday and we've made it to the Denver Airport where we await our connection to Billings. We already miss "Gickey"

Will finish posting when we get home.

What excitement--- I just found your trippy!
And I just had to say "HI" while you are still in the world. You are, aren't you? You haven't left yet, have you? No, I'm pretty sure you leave tomorrow.

Before I gush about your report---- a little 4-1-1 about "US".

#1) We feel an instant animal connection to anyone from MT. (or is it all the deer spirits we've hit with our cars traveling the Big Sky roads?)

#2) Hubby and I both grew up in Gt. Falls. with many a relative still there.

#3) both went to school at UM

#4) Spend our summers at our place on Flathead (heaven on earth!)

#5) But, unlike your cute little family--- I am pretty much the only Disney addict in our cute little family.

OK, enough about me. (like I said though, it's fun to "meet" people from your home state!)

And onto YOU....
You have been entertaining me all afternoon with your report (I'm finally all caught up). Anxious to hear how you guys wrap it up.

And a shout out to your wife---- you make me laugh! Love your additions and "what-really-happened"!

Great Job guys!!

Thanks! We live in Billings where my wife grew up. I lived all over the world but have called MT home since I got out of the Army in 1990.

Yes, we are ALL Disney nuts and I've already started planning for next year. I've got the dates done but have to decide which resorts. I think we're done with "off-site" and will stay on-site prior to moving to our DVC room.

Stay tuned for grand finale....

 

[pixie dust 112]

Have a safe trip home! I too want to recommend...beg... that you post your life from when you get home until you go back to the motherland next year! You too are sooo funny. What will I do for entertainment if you stop posting