Hi YaYas - I'm writing this from the hospital ER........ the emergency techs were gracious enough to put Kim, Jay and I in adjoining rooms while they are working on us.
It's kinda of a long (and funny, but not too funny) story about how we ended up here.....
It all started when I was preparing to do my Exotic Dance Of The Seven Veils........ well, Jeannie got me to thinking - it is only 15º outside tonight, and I always perform the dance outside...... the veils could freeze to my flesh. So, I say to myself, "Pam, what the heck! Go for it - try Jeannie's suggestion of veal." So I do it- I tie 7 pieces of veal to my body with string.
About that time, Kim comes over for coffee and a bowl of stew. She decides she wants to dance, too. Only she is gonna wear her thong and "I Love Apolo" crop top, complete with his photo emblazoned on it. I tried to explain my reasoning about the thong freezing but she wouldn't budge.....
We headed off to the woods, walking very quickly as the snow has very cold on our piggies. We could spy Jay skulking behind us, with his videocamera. He as dressed in camo, with little tree twigs stuck in his ears and clothing.
For a few moments, all was bliss - Kim and I were so "one with the universe" as we pranced and twirled. I tell you, it was so liberating. Although, if truth be told, the veal did leave a couple of marks from slapping against my nekkid body.
And then all beezeebus broke lose!!

The scent of the raw veal attracted a pack of wild dogs. They leapt from the woods, their giant fang teeth were gnashing and snarling. I automatically went into the fetal position, to protect my cha-chas. I cried for Jay to come and protect Kim and I - but alas! His tongue, which was hanging out the entire time Kim and I were doing our Exotic Dance, had become frozen to the lenses of the camcorder.
Kim was valiantly trying to make her way over to distract the dogs from my body, but her thong had frozen to her...... well, it was frozen, ok! And of course Apolo's furry little face was solid on her boobies. ( I personally think she like that!)
Kim finally made it over to me and got the veal untied from my body. With a herculean effort, she heaved what was left of the 7 pieces of veal into the brush and the pack of dogs took after it.
Somehow we made our way to Jay's car and got to the emergency room. The doctors are confident they will have Kim thawed out in a couple more hours. Jay's tongue should also be free and without any lasting harm.
They have swabbed my buttocks with peroxide and will commence with the stitching in any moment. The doctors assure me there will be no permanent scars.
Pam