The DDA Trouble Free Zone Part 10

[bear74]

This is hilarious!!!! My mom just emailed this to me:

To all of you that have sent me emails:

I must send my thanks to whoever sent me the one about rat poop in the glue
on envelopes because I now have to use a wet towel with every envelope that
needs sealing.

Also, now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl (Penny
Brown) who is about to die in the hospital for the 1,387,258th time.

I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the
$15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating
in their special e-mail program.

I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out
for me, and St. Theresa's novena has granted my every wish.

I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant
freaks with no eyes or feathers.

I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water
buffalo on a hot day.

Thanks to you, I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I
forward an email to seven of my friends and make a wish within five
minutes.

Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove
toilet stains.

I no longer can buy gasoline without taking a man along to watch the car
so a serial killer won't crawl in my back seat when I'm pumping gas.

I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr. Pepper since the people who make these
products are atheists who refuse to put "Under God" on their cans.

I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.

And thanks for letting me know I can't boil a cup water in the
microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face...disfiguring me
for life.

I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked
with a needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a
perfume sample and rob me.

I no longer receive packages from UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al
Qaeda in disguise.

I no longer shop at Target since they are French and don't support our
American troops or the Salvation Army.

I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number
for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore,
and Uzbekistan.

I no longer have any sneakers -- but that will change once I receive my
free replacement pair from Nike.

I no longer buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have
their recipe.

Thanks to you, I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big brown
African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when it
bites my butt.

Thank you too for all the endless advice Andy Rooney has given us. I can
live a better life now because he's told us how to fix everything.

And thanks to your great advice, I can't ever pick up $5.00 I dropped in
the parking lot because it probably was placed there by a sex molester
waiting underneath my car to grab my leg.

Oh, and don't forget this one either!

I can no longer drive my car because I can't buy gas from certain gas
companies!

If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 70
minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 PM this
afternoon and the fleas from 12 camels will infest your back, causing you
to grow a hairy hump. I know this will occur because it actually happened
to a friend of my next door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's
cousin's beautician...

That is too funny Kate.

ETA this is post 45,000

 

[tinknme]

So cute Jo

Ramiro will be wearing this September 30 @ WDW.
I will be smiling ear to ear.

 

[PNO4TE]

Any lurkers out there ready to pounce?

nope... wouldn't get it anyway!

 

[julia & nicks mom]

Anne Marie -

you are beautiful - it is so nice to "see" you!!!!!

I hope your pregnancy test comes out how you want it to!!! Did you go buy a home pregnancy test or decide to wait and hear from the doctor?

 

[tinker1bell]

Ramiro will be wearing this September 30 @ WDW.
I will be smiling ear to ear.

Jo,

I really like that

 

[Tammi67]

Congrats Jennifer!

 

[bear74]

Ramiro will be wearing this September 30 @ WDW.
I will be smiling ear to ear.

too cute

 

[Tammi67]

And with that I'm off to bed. Have a good night everyone!

 

[tinknme]

You got it Jennifer!

That is too funny Kate.

 

[legalslave]

Jennifer - post 45000 and the last post on page 3000 - two for one!

 

[triplefigs]

Birthday Party pics. Same password "beachfun"

http://s19.photobucket.com/albums/b175/DenisePersonal/6th Birthday Party/

 

[PNO4TE]

And with that I'm off to bed. Have a good night everyone!

night, Tammi

ETA: This post is time stamped 10:01, but my computer clock says it is really 10:21... weird

 

[tinknme]

I need to head to bed myself, early shift tomorrow Nite all!

And with that I'm off to bed. Have a good night everyone!

 

[legalslave]

Great pictures of more happy times Did Paula have something to do with Rees's shirt? It looks suspiciously like her talented work. The candles on Davis's cake are so well aligned that at first glance I thought he only had 3!!

 

[PNO4TE]

I need to head to bed myself, early shift tomorrow Nite all!

Night, Janet!

 

[PNO4TE]

And now it is my turn to turn in! See you all in the morning.

 

[bear74]

night all
time stamp is 9:13 computer says 9:33

 

[bengalbelle]

Birthday Party pics. Same password "beachfun"

http://s19.photobucket.com/albums/b175/DenisePersonal/6th Birthday Party/

Really cute pictures! I missed a bunch of posts from last night and I still need to view your beach pictures!

 

[Brendita]

THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR SUPPORT THESE PAST FEW WEEKS!!!

The doctor's office just called and told me that Nicks test looks normal!

I still want to talk with Nick's doctor to find out what caused the original test to be abnormal -

but the nurse said that the echo is much more accurate than an EKG!!

I can not even tell you all how relieved I am!!!!

Kate that is the best news.
As my DD job is to check lab tests.
I can tell you these people look at 1000's of tests per day.
Yes I said 1000's.
So it's very easy to get a misread or incorrect reading.
Sometimes it's the person doing the testing, or reading it,
sometimes it's the machine that does the test.

 

[marcij]

Birthday Party pics. Same password "beachfun"

http://s19.photobucket.com/albums/b175/DenisePersonal/6th Birthday Party/

What a fun party! I found myself wanting to paint some pottery!