So do you ever wonder if all this planning and reading on the boards help to......RUIN a trip?
To an extent, yes. But I don't consider them the deciding factor.
Some can be bad reviews and I'm not talking legitimate critique. I'm talking 'I couldn't get a same day reservation at BoG for my party of 12, therefore my ENTIRE trip is a failure.'
Some is, in my opinion, self inflicted; i.e. parents who keep their children in the parks far beyond their limits (I can't tell you how many children I saw on our last trip that you could tell were upset from exhaustion) or force them to ride rides they're absolutely terrified of going on (saw this with a little girl who was terrified of ToT to tears and instead of leaving the line, they made futile attempts to convince her that it would be okay. Don't know if they ended up riding or not)
Some is micro-planning to such an extent that if it doesn't go perfectly according to schedule, they fall apart. (Witnessed a grown woman have a complete meltdown due to this.)
And some are legitimate bad experiences where everything that can go wrong did go wrong (terrible weather, got sick, rude CM's, etc.) and they just reached their breaking point.
I think what we all need to remember is that reviews on the DisBoards are, at the end of the day, subjective. Just because one person gave a bad review does not mean that it is legitimately that bad, it just means that person didn't like it. I also agree with a PP who said that we are more prone to share negative experiences over good ones. At one of my prior jobs, there was a saying that we had: If someone has a really good experience, they'll tell a handful of their friends. If they've had a negative one, they'll go out of their way to tell absolute strangers how bad it was.
It's also how we choose to react to negative reviews. Had I kept reading the posts of how crowded our trip was going to be, I would have dreaded it more than did and would have thrown myself into an anxiety attack. Was it crowded? Yes; the most I've ever seen at Disney. Were the negative posts wrong? No, I found them fairly accurate. But if you decide ahead of time that it's going to be bad, it's going to be bad because that's what you've convinced yourself of. I took the information I read, made my plans from what I took as valid reviews and still had a great trip.
By all means, be informed. It can help you make better decisions and improve the quality of your trip. But be discerning as well between legitimate complaints and those who literally have nothing good to say about anything. We've all seen them...